I woke up the next morning, I don't think I dreamt of anything. I was hoping to wake up and find it was all a bad dream but no such luck.
"morning lazy bones" kendall greeted me with.
"hey... All okay?" I asked
"yeah you feeling a bit happier today... I heard you crying last night bells" he said sounding concerned.
"I'm fine, just so confused" I replied.
"it will come back Isabelle, don't worry, James is coming over, how are you two?" He asked
"fine I guess, I think he still thinks we are together, he sends me kisses and says he loves me, its all a bit much from someone that I've known less than a week" I explained as I poured some cereal out.
"you adored him though bells. Don't give up on him... Promise me" he said.
"I won't, what's the deal with you and penny, she isn't your type I thought" I said.
"Isabelle don't even start with that crap, I had enough from you before, I don't need it now okay" he snapped.
"sorry I'm just saying that I wouldn't of seen you with a girl like that, that is all" I tried to explain.
"just drop it bells, I love her okay! Don't fuck me off so soon when I thought we were all getting a fresh start" he moaned.
"what? What do you mean a fresh start? So basically you don't want me to remember what a bitch your girlfriend is so I can get along with her! Thanks a bunch kendall" I shouted.
"no I didn't mean that, I'm just fed up with you having a pop at her all the time" he said.
"what do you mean all the time? I only met the girl yesterday, just goes to show her character that I can't stand her already. She is just using you for money!" I said angrily.
"fuck you Isabelle" kendall shouted just as James walked in the door.
"what is going on? Are you alright bells" James said pulling a chair out next to me and sitting on it.
I tried my hardest to hold my tears in but a few escaped.
Kendall stormed off out of the room.
"hey cmon, don't cry" he soothed.
"i tried talking about penny... He has never spoken to me like that before, ever" I sobbed.
James gave me a smile.
"bells he has, pretty much anytime you guys talk, he doesn't mean it, he just gets carried away" James explained.
"really?" I said shocked, the kendall I once knew was only ever kind, he never spoke to anyone like that, the only time I had was when people were being horrible to me. He was like my big brother.
"really! kendall has changed a lot since he started dating penny, he seems miserable without her, but miserable with her, but he won't have a word said against her" James said.
I just shook my head at the ridiculous relationship my lovely kendall had found.
"cmon eat up, I have a fun day planned... Well until 3 then I'm having another photo shoot session" he said excitedly.
I ate my breakfast, and got myself ready to go, James had my truck again, he drove us to a lovely looking house
"is this ours?" I asked.
"yep, cmon" James said as he jumped out the truck then opened my door and grabbed me by the hand and led me inside.
As I got in the house I had a good look round
"oh my God its familiar! This is the back ground to that photo I said about!" I said, sounding excited, I then grabbed his hand and walked quickly through the house. I went in to the kitchen. I looked around
"okay I bet in that cupboard is the dishwasher" I said confidently
I opened it up and there was the integrated dish washer.
I gave a little scream of delight.
I ran up the stairs and found the bathroom behind the correct door, I found the linen cupboard behind the right door, I could even tell James which drawer had his socks in.
I was so excited. James was laughing, he had this twinkle in his beautiful brown eyes.
"okay I have one more test for you if you are willing to try it" James said smiling from ear to ear,
"yeah go for it!" I replied.
James led me back downstairs and in to one of the rooms, the door was shut, but as he opened it a tiny little dog leapt out wagging his tail.
"fox!" I screamed "oh my God my little guy... I've missed you so much!" I said as I crouched down to pick him up. He seemed so happy to see me, his tail wagging almost hurt as it whipped across me so quickly.
"I remember fox, I know fox, I remember getting him." I said excitedly.
The look of relief on james' face is something I don't think I will forget.
"its hazy but I remember it James. It was a breeder from San Diego, she lived by the beach... I can't remember you being there... I remember the lady... But not you" I said disappointed.
James smiled "I wasn't with you when you picked him up that's why. Bells this is a huge step. Its all going to comeback to you" he said grinning.
I put fox down then gave James a hug.
"cmon we need to get going, I've got a busy day planned" he said
James then took me on another mystery tour in my truck. we headed back to the beach, but a bit further along than we were yesterday.
"how do you fancy windsurfing?" He finally said as he unlocked a large gate in a boating yard.
"I would love it! Is this where I work?" I asked looking around.
James shook his head.
"no this is where me and you keep our gear" he said as we walked in to the yard and in to a large storage area.
James and I had a lot of fun windsurfing, it was so good to do something I knew I was good at. It was like a little respite from the crazy world I had been dumped in.
After we dried off and put our stuff away James declared that he had a picnic waiting for us. He looked a bit concerned though as some beach goers had recognized him and he was getting bugged for autographs.
"did you want to go home and sit in the garden with this?" He said to me.
"yeah I think that would be best" I said getting a little nervous at the amount of attention he stirred.
"thanks for taking me out today" I said on the journey back to the house.
"no problem, its so good to see you smile again!" He replied.
Once home we sat on the grass in the beautiful back garden and enjoyed the picnic that James had made. Fox was running around like a loony.
"bells what do you think of me?" James asked after he had been silent for a bit.
I looked at him. Only one thought could strike me.
"I think you are the most handsome man I have ever seen... Honestly James you almost hurt my eyes" I laughed.
James smiled "they say that you can never give a second first impression, I guess in a way I'm lucky because I am with you. Is it a good impression?" He asked. I could hear the emotion in his voice.
I smiled back at James "I can see why I fell in love with you the first time round, put it that way." I replied.
"do you think that you might fall in love with me again?" He asked.
"I would like to" I said blushing.
"your my world izzi. Honestly I love you so much. Your my everything" he then said not breaking eye contact.
"James did I lose my virginity to you?" I said now going bright red.
James had a little chuckle and looked at his feet.
"no not with me, you dated a guy back home in Kansas for a few months, you lost it with him... But our first time was very special" he said.
"I wish I could remember" I said quietly.
"so do I bells" he said.
I felt a bit emotional and a tear escaped down my face.
"don't you start up again" James joked as he moved closer and pulled me in for a hug.
Once again he smelt lovely. So... Homely, he was my home. I pulled out from the hug and looked at his beautiful face through my teary eyes, I rubbed my thumb over it, wondering how many times I had done this but couldn't remember.
James leant in for a kiss, he was scared I could tell. He tested the water first with just a small soft kiss on the lips, it felt nice, I then welcomed more by running my hand through his hair.
Our tongues met, his slowly danced around mine. It was incredible. He was mind blowing. I felt like a million memories were hitting me but none of them I could process, nothing was getting through, all I knew was that kissing James Broke down this invisible barrier inside me that made my heart ache for him, I was in love with him, so deeply, so passionately, so unconditionally.
It was the weirdest feeling in the world to know you were so in love with someone that you knew nothing about.
James pulled away "sorry" he breathed and rested his head against mine.
"don't be sorry... Don't be, feel this" I said and held his hand up against my chest, my heart beat was going so fast.
James smiled then let out a little laugh.
"I still take your breath away then" he chuckled as he felt the rhythm of my heart beat.
"you do, you definitely do" I replied.
James checked his watch then announced that it was time I had to go back to kendalls, unless of course I wanted to stay at my house, but I declined that offer. But I did take fox with me to kendalls while James went to his photo shoot.
Logan was visiting when I arrived.
He seemed tense.
Kendall seemed to have forgiven me but he seemed offish. He later left saying he was going out with penny but would be back after 5, I gathered this was why Logan was visiting, so I had a baby sitter.
I sat in the living room watching some mindless TV, Logan sat in there too, the conversation was few and far between.
After a few minutes Logan decided to try his act like nothing had changed trick again.
"bells we usually watch porn when we are alone together" he laughed.
I frowned at him "I hope that is a joke" I replied.
"yeah it is" he smiled "we can try it though of you like" he then added with a big grin.
I laughed at him, there was something about that cheeky grin that made me happy.
"if I was the old me and we was hanging out, what would we be doing?" I then asked him.
"well nothing really just having a laugh... You wanna play on the Wii with me, you usually beat me at Mario Kart" he said.
"yeah okay" I replied
So my afternoon went by with Logan playing video games with him, he really was so funny with some of the things he would come out with, I really found myself warming to him.
"I'm sorry about yesterday, I didn't mean to be such a bitch, if I could help you with the penny thing then I would" I said as we played yet another game, Logan had beaten me in all of the games, he was now sat upside down on the sofa in an attempt to let me win.
"its okay bells, I know that if you could then you would" he said.
"I spoke to James about it, he said that she demands money off of you or she a will tell kendall.
Logan laughed "oh bells.... You do make me smile, I didn't know that James knew, you must of told him then promised me that you hadn't". He said chuckling.
"oh.... Sorry." I replied "at least I did though, otherwise I wouldn't of known that" I added.
"true" Logan said with an upside down shrug.
"your face is bright red... That can't be good for you to sit like that" I said looking at Logan as his legs sprawled out in the air.
"well you best hurry up and win a race then Isabelle" he said sarcastically.
We both laughed and kendall and penny walked in the room, eyeing up the odd position Logan was in "I see you two are mates again" kendall said with a smile.
"getting there... Logan has been filling me in on lots of gaps" I said raising my eyebrow to penny, she crossed her arms over her chest and planted her best bitch face on her.
"okay cool. Penny wants a take out tonite Isabelle so feel free to raid the cupboards" kendall said.
"mmmm we wouldn't want to poison you with a take away allergy" penny said sarcastically.
I frowned at her, she was so evil it was untrue.
"its alright bells I know a great place that you can eat with me" Logan said then flipped the right way up on the sofa.
"okay cool... Can fox come?" I said then paused the game,
"sure he can" Logan replied.
Logan and I actually ended up going to dominos for a pizza, it took a while to be convinced, but after Logan spoke to the guy behind the counter and it was explained that they now do gluten free bases I was very happy with the world I currently lived in.
"oh my God, I haven't had a dominos since a was about ten!" I said a I shoved another slice of pizza in my mouth at Logans house.
Logan laughed hysterically " bells we do this at least once a week" he said.
"really... I so wish I didn't have all these dumb allergies" I said.
"well if you didn't you probably wouldn't be with your prince charming" Logan said.
I smiled "what do you mean?" I asked.
"carlos almost killed you once, before you dated James, he handed you the wrong coffee when we were all hanging about at that studio, you ended up drinking one that had hazelnuts or something in it, but you had this immediate reaction to it and it was Mr sensible maslow that had the brains to check your purse for an epi pen, everyone else was just panicking, kendall froze, I was phoning an ambulance, but it was James that saved your life. Ever since then you were smitten with him, and he has kept an eye on more or less everything that passes your lips, or anything new you come in contact with." He said.
"my God... He really is my knight in shining armour then" I said out loud.
"pretty much, he was the one that bought you this" he said pointing at my medi bracelet, it was like a locket that unclipped and had a concertina effect of paper folded up inside which listed all of my allergies.
I had always worn a bracelet but not one that listed every allergy and every reaction. The Caduceus medical cross was on the front, I looked at the back of the locket type holder as i twisted it in my fingers, there was an inscription that I hadn't noticed "keep me safe, for I am loved" I read out loud.
I shook my head in awe at how amazing I was finding James to be.
"I kissed him today... I thought my heart might explode" I laughed still looking at the bracelet.
Logan smiled "let's hope that's not an allergic reaction to James your developing then"
I had fun with Logan, he really was a super guy, once I let my guard down with him his dirty mind and silly jokes would have my ribs hurting from laughter.
Logan dropped me and fox off at kendalls and I went off to bed, I did the same as last night and text James, it was a bit more relaxed now, he knew I liked him so he was more relaxed rather than trying to sell me his best points, he had begun teasing me that anything that he had done to annoy me had never happened and that if I did remember them he would convince me that it was a dream.
I found it hard to believe that James could ever annoy me, he was so lovely, so caring, he was amazing.
That night I did dream, it was a very mixed up dream world, I'm not sure what was once reality and what was a made up dream but I woke up after I dreamt penny was screaming at me "don't you fucking dare!" I heard from her mouth which jolted me awake.
I tried to re live it in my head but I couldn't hold on to it, its funny how dreams just kind of fade away from your memory as you wake up, but I hadn't forgotten her screaming her foul words at me. Even in dream land she was a bitch.