"Are you kidding me?" Evan demands after the slew of curses come to an end.
"Do I look like the kidding type?" Rick snaps back, gripping the wheel tightly in his large ready-to-strangle-someone hands.
Evan shakes his head, his brows pulling together in confusion. "How did Ryan steal our territory?"
"Because we weren't there to protect it!" Rick snarls over his shoulder.
The vehicle swerves as it fills with screams. Alicia grabs the wheel to straighten it. Rick immediately gains control over the SUV again as Alicia yells at him.
"Calm my ass! You almost got us killed! Slow down, or I'm driving!"
He growls, hunching over the steering wheel, but eases up on the gas pedal. Alicia keeps her hand on the wheel for another minute longer before pulling back.
Silence falls over us as our racing hearts slow to a normal rhythm and the truth sets in.
While we've been stressing out about the rogues attacking the Silver Star Pack, Ryan used them as a distraction to cross into our territory and stake his claim over it.
Does that mean it no longer belongs to us? It can't be that simple, can it?
"So, what's the plan now?" Evan asks, breaking the silence that has filled the SUV for several miles now.
Rick's eyes flick to Evan's reflection in the rear view mirror before returning to the road. "We're meeting your aunts, dropping Ali off with them so she's safe and away from harm's way, while the rest of us continue on home to confront him. Your parents will meet us at the mall, along with some warriors that Clyde feels comfortable in sending to aid us should Ryan and any of his followers try to attack us. We'll try to reason with him first and foremost before we initiate any kind of strategic attack."
My stomach twists into knots as I listen to Rick. His voice is calm and calculated again, making my anxiety level spike once more. He's talking about another battle, and that means more fighting and killing.
He can't be serious. I'm not ready for this. I'm not over the last one, never mind another attack.
And with Evan's brother!
I look to Evan and see him swallowing next to me, nodding his head. He presses his hand to his forehead. "I can't believe this. I just can't. Has he lost his mind completely?"
"A lunatic can't formulate a strategy like that," Rick says. "Unless, perhaps, it was Kairo's idea. Any idea what Ryan's mental state is?"
Evan shakes his head. "I haven't seen him in four and a half years. When he left..." He hesitates, looking down at the phone in his hands on his lap. "When he left, it was like he was a different person. Course, that's understandable after what happened, but no, I have no idea what his mental state is like. Before... Before that, he was a good guy. Strong, logical-minded, calm..." He sighs and places the phone in an empty cup holder. "He changed. The extent of which, I have no idea."
Rick slows the vehicle down as we round a sharp bend in the road. I glimpse his face, which is like marble again-cold, smooth, and unfeeling. "What was the accident that your parents mentioned?"
Evan stiffens a little next to me, but he turns his gaze out the window.
"Evan?"
I reach over for his hand and entwine my fingers with his. He glances briefly at our hands, but refuses to raise his gaze.
"If you don't tell me now, I'll get it from Emily," Rick grumbles. "Emily?"
Evan's eyes shoot toward Rick in the front seat. "Okay, okay."
Emily sighs with relief behind us. I look over my shoulder to see her wringing her hands in her lap, biting her lower lip, and her eyes clenched shut.
How is it that she knows, but I don't? Evan's my mate! There should be no secrets between us, yet Emily knows about this and he wouldn't even tell me before?
I clench my teeth as my heart tightens under the grip of an invisible hand. I pull away from him as he sucks in a lungful of air.
"His mate was killed."
His eyes finally look into mine and I see moisture glistening over his golden irises before he blinks it away
I crumple under his gaze, knowing that this is why it's been so hard for him to tell me. My heart aches at the thought of it as everyone falls silent again. I just want to pull him into a hug, but the seat belt restrains me to my seat.
It must have been terrible.
His brother couldn't handle the loss, and now that Evan's found me, he can't bear the thought of losing me too. Heck, I can't bear the thought of losing him either. We've only been together two months, but it feels like it's been a lifetime. Sure, he irks me at times, but I'm sure I do the same to him. Nevertheless, he completes me, and makes me feel more content in my own skin, if that makes any sense.
But then, he was really angry about his brother too.
'If he threatens you... I have to kill him.'
Those aren't words of mourning or loss. They're words of anger. There has to be something more that he's not telling me. Evan's not one to hold a grudge for no reason.
What did Ryan do to piss Evan off so much? And why would Ryan go crazy at the loss of his mate?
I swallow an emotional lump in my throat as I try to understand the delicate nature of the mate bond. If I lost Evan, or if someone killed him, would I slip into insanity as well? I think about it for a few minutes during the silence that follows. I might want revenge on the person who killed him, would that make me insane? I don't think so, but what else happened that led to Ryan taking off, abandoning his family, and losing himself in his grief?
"I don't understand," I say, choosing my words carefully as I try to wrap my head around the confusing subject. "What happens when a mate dies? Do they go crazy with grief, or does something else drive them into madness?"
"Just like people," Alicia says, turning around in her seat so she can see me as she talks, "no two shifters are the same or will react to death in the same way."
"So his reaction has nothing to do with the mate bond?"
"The mate bond does make the feelings more intense, yes, but everyone will react differently. Some go insane, some fall into depressions in which they cannot climb out of, and others are more resilient and will learn to cope with their loss over time," she says. "It is an emotional blow that we feel very deeply. Just like when we find our mates, we feel a sense of wholeness. When we lose our mates to death, we feel like a part of us has been ripped away."
I nod in response to her answer. I would hate to think that if I lost Evan I'd inevitably go crazy. "How many go insane?"
"Very few," she says, tucking a lock of blonde hair behind her ear. "I mean, finding your mate is rare enough. Usually it's just alphas or offspring of alphas who find their mates because they move around the country more freely, so they come into contact with more shifters, and alphas are typically stable emotionally."
"Typically," Evan parrots.
"Yeah, not like this one," Alicia says, jabbing her thumb at Rick.
"Excuse me?" He doesn't look too pleased with this assertion, but his face is still passive as he keeps his eyes on the road.
She pats his arm. "I'm just teasing. Trying to lighten the mood since Keith's not here to do that."
"I probably would lose my mind if he were here," Rick mumbles under his breath with a disgruntled sigh.
Alicia ignores his comment and turns her attention back to me. "Of course, not all shifters have good hearts, much like humans. There's always a rotten apple somewhere."
"With Ryan, there was no hint or indication," Evan says, suddenly quiet again. "He just snapped."
Alicia nods. "That's typically how the insane ones react. You're lucky he didn't inherit the land after all. He probably would have driven you crazy with him."
A heavy sigh escapes his lips as he leans his chin on his palm, gazing out the window at the passing scenery.
I catch myself chewing on my bottom lip as I watch him. I still don't know why Evan reacted so angrily towards his brother. Was it because he left and never came back until now and has joined with the rogues instead of his family?
"Evan," I say in a soft voice as I place a hand on his knee. "I understand now why talking about Ryan upsets you, but why are you so angry with him too?"
His shoulders tense up as he squeezes his eyes shut. A shuddering breath seeps out of his lungs before he opens his mouth and his voice is so low I can barely grasp it.
"He killed his mate."