"s-sorry I just uh..zoned out." I responded to my scene awkwardly. I backed away and rubbed the back of my neck still waiting for her to do something similar. "Oh." She added in a confused tone, "y-yeah, that's fine. I kinda dazed off too, so.." she pressed her lips together as the dim room grew silent.
I stared at her, not really knowing what to do. God I should've kissed her..what is wrong with me? That was such a good time. I heard my phone receive a notification so I grabbed it and powered it on.
It's Michael.
Michael: how's it going over there?
Thomas: fine
All good
I glanced at the text on the bright phone screen, then back over to Rae who was sitting in her chair, also on her phone.
"Hey, I gotta go, my mom just texted me to go home." I lied while sliding my phone into the pocket of my jeans, feeling a need of escape. Guilt twisted my stomach as the words exited my mouth.
"Oh, that's fine. You'll be here tomorrow right?" She questioned while lifting her chin up to give me her attention. "Yeah, I should be. If not then I'll text you, ok?" I responded with a warm smile resting on my face.
"Ok, be safe." She smiled as her hand waved freely in the air, giving me her goodbyes.
-
This week sure was interesting for the both of them. They almost kissed two days in a row which was crazy for the two to comprehend.
Unfortunately for them, the next few days resumed back to as it was before the touchy encounters they both experienced.
Sometimes they would catch one another staring, or being oddly close, but why would they mind? It made their hearts beat faster than ever and would make their stomachs do backflips.
-
Once Thomas decided to stop showing up where Rae was usually dropped off at school, he hasn't spoken to Isaiah. But boy hasn't he been jealous of Rae's tedious connection with him. Why couldn't it just be him? Why couldn't he be the one with his arm around Rae's neck as they walked. It all just bothered him and made him feel like he was gonna be driven mad by the small actions.
-
Today is now December 22nd. The last day of school before entering break was yesterday, he and Rae haven't spoken since, as they both had different plans how to spend their vacations.
Rae was going to hang out with her group of friends, consisting the 3 trouble-makers and Thomas was gonna hang out with his friends on Valorant.
They both thought this was a great plan to keep them both entertained for the two weeks they had vacation for, but they were wrong. Especially after what just happened between them, how did they think they could go so long without each other?
-
Rae pov
"So we're all going out tonight, right?" I lied in my bed holding my phone up to my ear asking Isaiah a question about our plans tonight.
"Yeah, since Asher has his license he'll be the one picking all of us up. Just text your address into the group chat I made and we'll be there around 8." He said calmly and speaking in a raspy voice, probably from just waking up out of a nap.
"Alright, sounds good! Oh! And we're also going to your house for Christmas too, right?" I questioned while twiddling with Mika's ear as his furry little white head rested on my lap.
"Yeah. I'll make sure to pick you up that day, alright?" He stated, making sure I understood what he was saying. My heart started beating faster from just hearing his voice like this.
"Ok, just text me when you get here." I said with a soft smile on my face, as a cool air breathed against my face from my fan.
"Alright, see you tonight Rachel."
He abruptly hung up the phone, closing off my access to also say goodbye to him. A cheesy smile appeared on my face as I tossed my phone onto the crinkled blanket that hung over my bed to get up and get ready.
-
2 hours have passed by since the call, and it's 8:16 p.m right now. I already texted my address in the group chat, why aren't they coming to pick me up?
I sat there in the cold, rubbing my arms trying to seek warmth and hope that they'd show up, but once it hit 8:45 I just walked back inside to the warm house.
"Back so soon? You barely left about 30 minutes ago." My mom asked as she lied on the couch with a lamp next to her. She closed the book she was reading giving her full attention.
"They didnt even pick me up mom." I said, smiling softly, trying my hardest to prevent my voice from cracking or my eyes from tearing up. The last thing I wanted was for my mom to think I was a little wimp who didn't have real friends.
"Darling.." she stood up off of the white couch and walked over to me. I stayed still, feeling very tensed in the moment, not really knowing what to do except show my real emotions. My bottom lip quivered and I sniffled as she accepted me into her arms, pulling me close into her embrace. "Who did this to you? Is it that tutor boy you always talk about?" She questioned as she swayed back and forth slowly, brushing the hair that fell down my back with her hand.
I chuckled softly at her description of Thomas, "no mom, it wasn't him." Tears stung my eyes and my vision became blurry from the wetness around my pupil.
"I'll tell you what, it's Christmas break isn't it?" She mumbled, but clearly enough for me to understand. Her breath pressing against the side of my face, making me feel welcomed in a way, and comfortable; probably the most I've been in a while.
"Mhm." I nodded while closing my eyes, and resting my head on her shoulder. Is this what I could've had all these years if I had just gave her a chance to comfort me?
"Invite that boy over, I can tell you enjoy his company, and it's quite obvious he enjoys yours too." She chuckled lightly, causing to me give in a soft smile. "I've seen the way you look at him..Its, magical.." she stated, almost in a whisper.
"What's so magical mom?" I questioned, still swaying rhythmically in her arms. The strands of her hair tickling my cheek as her hands followed up and down my back.
I haven't felt so close to someone in so long.. This is what I've needed all along.
"Teen love." She chuckled, "teen love?" I asked, almost giving a chuckle at the words.
"It's so obvious, but you guys don't see it." She said calmly, and pulled away from me gifting me a warm smile, "invite him over Rachel. If he declines, it's fine, it is late..But if he does come over, then he cares for you. Be careful with those boys. You don't wanna lose them, they're the important ones during this journey." She grinned even wider then she originally was while caressing my cheek.
"Ok." I whispered heart fully, while staring into her eyes, thankful for her advice. The same pit of warmth I get in my stomach that usually occurs with Thomas, was summoned right now, but this was different. This made me feel like I was glowing, and I could do anything. But when I get it with Thomas I feel limited of my actions, nervous and like I just want to hug him 24/7. It's odd..
-
I walked to my room with a smile on my face I couldn't hide. I closed the door behind me as Mika followed me into my room. His pink tongue was hanging out of his mouth and he panted lightly. I let out a small giggle as I planted onto my soft bed feeling Mika crawl over me to get to the other side. I turned onto my back and pulled out my phone. I scrolled down to Thomas' contact and smiled widely as it popped into my vision. I tapped on it and brought the phone up to my ear. Surprisingly he answered right as the first ring ended.
"Rae?" He asked confusingly, "You ok?" He stated, curiosity filling his voice, probably wondering why the hell I was calling him at 9:00.
"Yeah." I chuckled, "I was actually wondering..do you wanna come over, right now?" I hesitantly asked, my heart beating faster as each second ticked by.
"N-Now..? It's pretty late though." I sighed as I sort of picked up that he didn't want to come over. I pressed my lips together in disappointment, while also trying to think of something to convince him.
"It'll be fun though? I mean we can watch movies, play Valorant, prank call people, I mean listen to me, I'm bored out of my mind! I just think it'd be a great idea to waste allll of my energy on you." I chuckled over the line as shared a brief laugh with me. I twiddled with a strand of my hair as I sat up properly in bed waiting for his response. "So?"
"Yeah, I have nothing to do anyway. My mom's out again, she usually works night shifts so I'll be over there soon." He said talking with a smile on his face, I immediately noticed it by the way his tone changed so suddenly.
"Great. I'm just gonna get changed into pajamas and I'll see you soon." The soles of my feet plants on the floor as I crawled off the bed and walked towards my closet, still holding the phone up to my ear.
"Ok, just uh, make sure to lock the door this time." He teased. I laughed in embarrassment as he joined me.
"Shut up." I stated a bit giggly still, "I'll see you in a few." I said in a soft voice, trying to hold in all my hyper and excited emotions.
"Ok bye." He said soothingly as he hung up the phone. I tossed it on the bed next to Mika and walked over to the door. "'make sure to lock the door this time.'" I said, mocking his words in a playful tone. I pressed my lips together as I locked the door. "Oh Thomas.."
-
"Hey! Thanks for coming over." I smiled as I opened the door greeting him warmly. He returned his sweet smile to mine and released a chuckle.
"Yeah, it's no problem." He walked in quite pale, with a red nose, "it feels a lot nicer in here. I was freezing while I was outside, it's real cold right now." He said looking around, shifting his curious gaze up and down the inside of my house. I giggled inaudibly, and walked over to the kitchen, "hot cocoa?" I questioned with a grin spreading across my face.
"Always." He laughed, as he joined me in the kitchen. He slid on top of our marble countertop that was centered in the kitchen, "so is there a specific reason why I'm over here right now? Or did you just miss me?" He smirked teasingly while swiping his hair to the left, resting above his beautiful eyes. I pressed my lips together as they curled into a smile.
"Actually, I was supposed to hang out with my Isaiah and those guys tonight, but they ditched me." I admitted while leaning my elbow next to the stove, like it was no big deal. He shook his head in disappointment, "well, at least we can do something together. That'd cheer you up right?" He smiled widely, while wiping his nose that was still red from the outside cold.
"Yeah! But you being here has already cheered me up a lot." I giggled admittedly, as I presented a cheesy smile. His cheeks grew red, which I couldn't tell if it was from the cold, or if I caused it. He looked away, breaking eye contact and fixed his striped green scarf that comforted and wrapped around his neck snuggly.
-
I poured the hot cocoa into two mugs. I swirled the whipped cream on the liquid, and sprinkled small marshmallows on the fluffy substance, smiling as I served him. I joined him on the marble island, crossing my legs over another.
I looked down at my steaming hot cocoa, but before I sipped my own, I looked ahead of me and watched Thomas drink his. He brought it up to his pink lips and the whipped cream stuck to the rounded edge of his nose causing a small giggle to escape my mouth. He also laugh slightly, and took a sip of his drink through a wide smile.
"This is good." He states as his eyebrows rise in surprise. He cleared his throat and licked his lips, not removing his vision from the hot cocoa. "I've always loved this drink since I was a kid, Christmas has always been my favorite holiday."
He chuckled briefly while looking around my house again and wiping the small bit of whipped cream off his nose, "and it wasn't because of the presents either. I-I know a lot of others say this, but it really was because of the quality time I got to spend with my parents. Especially the times I got to spend with my dad, the gifts really didn't even matter since my dad only came around every once and a while."
His eyes sharply directed into mine as he carefully took another sip out of the hot beverage. He planted his mug on top of the marble island and smiled. "I remember that one Christmas day, my dad came home with a whole bunch of summer stuff, and I was so confused because it had been snowing for so long!" He laughed briefly as a breathtaking smile crossed his lips. "I asked him what it was for and he told me it was for the summer, because that's when he would be back to visit me again." His smile faded, and he wiped his nose again, shifting his gaze elsewhere. "That summer I out-grew everything he gifted me. It was unfortunate, and it bummed me out a whole lot." He sighed deeply, "But, I guess it didn't matter too much anyway." His eyes aimed down at Mika who had finally come out of my room, as he shook his fury little body to fully awaken himself.
My eyes focused into his still, "why didn't it matter?" I furrowed my eyebrows as I stupidly asked the question. I took a sip out of my own drink, tilting my head slightly to the right waiting for him to continue, while he looked at me like he was at a loss for words.
"My dad, didn't make it back..He died, during those 6 months." His straight face melted into a frown, and I immediately began to panic in my mind, almost choking on my hot cocoa. I looked at him sympathetically as I realized I brought back crucial memories. "I-I didn't even know until school started." His said shakily, as his voice cracked. My heart split into two, breaking even more as each word spilt from his mouth forcefully.
I've never seen you sad..
It pained me to watch, to listen, to sit there and do nothing only because I didn't know what to do.
"I, j-just thought that they had kept him for longer, and, and h-he'd be back soon, for Halloween..o-or for Christmas..!" He croaked, looking well close to tears.
He grabbed his striped scarf and brought it to his eyes, attempting to wipe away the emotions. His chin started shaking as he tried his very best to contain his tears but they easily brimmed his eyes, "I-It had never even crossed my mind!..that he had maybe died. I-I even remember writing a small song for him that, that I would play for him since I was learning guitar back then." He wept in a shaky voice, obviously trying to choking back tears. He attempted to smile, but in response the start of his eyebrows curled up, and his lip quivered as his eyes flooded with tears.
"I was so excited for him to come back." He sniffled between words, as a single tear rolled down the side of his cheek. He stepped off the marble island and leaned his back against it. "I just couldn't wait, to hear his voice again, for his arms to wrap around my small body and to tell me..he was finally home.." His face scrunched up and he closed his eyes, squeezing them shut, still trying to close off his emotions. He pinched the inner corners of his eyes, trying to stop his emotional flow.
Tears began streaming down the side of his face along with his emotions as he sobbed. An awful expression crossed his face just paining me even more, my heart ached as I watched. "I just miss him Rae.." He admitted as his face fell into his hands. He continuously hiccuped from the strong tears now rolling quickly down his cheeks. Tears stung my eyes as I watched, stupidly not doing anything, and not knowing if I should.
He gasped for air after each sorrowful, and quiet cry left his quaking lips. He sniffled after each gasp, "I'm sorry.." he muttered, before sobbing again, and sniffling while wiping the dampened area around his eyes continuously as the tears kept spilling out.
Then I couldn't take it, those words burned my eyes with tears, I slid off the counter and attempted to wrap my arms around his large body compared to mine, I cried into his chest, gripping the back of his hoodie making sure I wouldn't let go.
He wrapped his arms around me tightly, passionately pulling me closer into his embrace trying to truly seek comfort. He looked down and deepened his face face into the crook of my neck. I felt his heavy tears slowly attach onto the surface of my collarbone.
"I'm sorry for making you talk about that." I spoke roughly through my tears and emotions, saddened that I had him go through that. He chuckled briefly, obviously still hurt. He brushed the back of my hair and rested his head on top of it.
"It's ok.. I am a little dramatic sometimes, I-I should be over it by now." He sniffled while laughing, his head lifted up, "it happened years ago.." he admitted disappointed in himself, while looking down at me.
"You're not dramatic Thomas." I said softly as my eyes met his puffy ones. "You're strong, and it's alright to cry like this sometimes." I cried as a tear ran down the side of my face. I brought my hand up to his cheek, and softly wiped his tears with my thumb. He sobbed quietly, and leaned his head into my hand. His hair tickled the surface of my fingers, and his tears met my thumb as I wiped them away. I lightly smiled at him trying my best to comfort him and he reflected my actions, while rubbing his cheek against the palm of my hand.
Thomas pov
I'm tempted.. I'm tempted to tell her right now that I love her.
As a friend or not, because I'm not even sure myself.
"I'm glad to have a friend like you Rae. Even though I've been friends with Michael and Toast for years, they've never been able to help me like this.." I stated in a gentle tone, "well, I guess I haven't really let them try and help me.. I didn't mean to start crying or to open up, but I did." I smiled while looking down at her. "I'm glad I did." Her face was nuzzled into my chest and she nodded in agreement. The arch of my back remained resting against the marble island.
"And I'm proud of you for that." She chuckled, and looked up at me, "even though I kinda forced it out of you." She giggled, while resuming our deep hug.
"How about we watch a movie?" I suggested in a soft voice, "I bet our cocoa is still hot, we can lie down while watching the movie and share a big warm blanket." I looked at her dispensing a beam full smile proud of my idea. The waves of her dark hair swayed as she parted from me. "I don't know about you, but that sounds like a good idea to me." I chuckled while walking away to her room.
"Where are you going?" She laughed while following me until I passed the living room, she turned and hopped over the arm of the couch plunging onto the soft cushions.
"I'm just gonna take off my shoes and hoodie." I said while tossing my hoodie onto her bed and leaving my shoes on her hard-wood floor. I quickly looked into her mirror and fixed my hair, swiping it to the left since it had gotten a little messed up from our passionate hug.
I skipped back out to the living room before I launched onto the white couch landing right next to Rachel, causing her to laugh.
I smiled as I sat up fixing my posture, "what movie do you wanna watch?" She questioned with the remote in her hand, as she scrolled through the countless movies that were displayed on the television screen.
"I don't know, you called me over here so you pick." I gently demanded, carless of her movie selection. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and watched Rae stand up out of my peripheral vision.
Suddenly the lights turned off. I looked around to see what happened and I saw Rae walking back with our mugs in her hand. A soft smile curled her lips up as she glanced at me, before quickly looking back at the table where she placed our glass mugs.
"Oh can you go get a blanket from my room? There's one on the floor next to my bed, it should be able to cover us both." She smiled, while joining me on the couch again, her hair bounced majestically as she was sat.
"Yeah, give me a moment." I jumped off the couch and jogged to her room. The door was already opened so I walked in, spotting the blanket immediately. I grinned and bent down on one knee to grab it, but I saw a green sleeve laying out from under the bed. My eyes trailed it, and my green hoodie, the one I thought I lost, lied right under her bed frame.
I smirked and pulled the cloth out as I chuckled to myself. I tucked it under the blanket and picked up the two items, closing the door behind me as I walked back into the colder air.
I tossed the blanket on her and she let out a giggle making me smile. "Look it, we can match now!" I teased, while throwing my hoodie on her. She looked at me on shock, "where did you find this?" She asked as she examined the piece of cloth.
"Under your bed? It was on accident by the way, I swear I wasn't scavenging or anything." I assured before she got to assuming anything odd.
"Oh, yeah uh s-sorry I just forgot to give it back when you let me borrow it." She furrowed her eyebrows followed by a nod as she pulled it over her head sliding into her body.
"It's fine." I chuckled, "I didn't really mind too much anyway, I barley even noticed." I stated honestly, while crawling on the couch to lay down next to her.
She sat up straight at the end of the couch, and I lied down next to her, my head was resting next to her right thigh while the rest of my body lied across the couch.
I hazily blinked as she pressed play on the movie, my eyelids felt heavier each time they'd close.
I'm so tired..
I focused my eyes to the Tv, squinting harshly from the screen brightness.
But I have to stay up for her.
Then suddenly I felt the palm of her hand rest on my head, and then she patted my hair gently. I looked around the area confused while not moving my head, I didn't want to give her my attention in case she would stop.
Then I felt her fingers linger through my hair, "you're gonna mess up my hair." I mumbled lazily, she giggled in response, "sorry."
She retracted her hand, "is it weird that I've always wanted to do that since I met you? Your hair is just like..unreal." she laughed again, and I couldn't help but join at the silly sentence.
Rae pov
Halfway through the movie I caught myself dazing off tiredly, "Thomas? Are you still awake?" I questioned quietly, not trying to wake him incase he was asleep already.
"Yeah, I'm awake still." He answered in a raspy voice, also seeming pretty tired. I looked down at him, and he was curled into a fetal position while snuggled into the blanket we were sharing.
I smiled softly while in awe of him. He looked adorable!
I adjusted myself into a laying position so I wasn't sitting up anymore, my head rested on the arm of the couch and everytime I blinked, my eyes grew heavier; Heavier until I couldn't open them anymore.
Eh, Thomas could just go back home when he feels like it.
-
I woke up to the sound of vague 'booms' and dialogue, and a slight tickling on the bottom of my chin. My eyes fluttered open curious of the noises, and it was another movie that had auto-played after the previous one I had selected. I tiredly squinted my eyes trying to scan the area for the remote, and spotted it on the glass table in front of us, it was located next to our mugs of hot cocoa, that probably wasn't hot anymore.
I tried to stretch my arm to reach the remote so I could power off the TV, but then I realized there was a weight on my chest. I curiously looked down l a little half-asleep, and saw Thomas sound asleep on my body hugging me.