Sweetie, I'm a guy - Total Dr...

By cerluvz

87.1K 2.4K 670

This is an self insert (but we'll call it an oc) x tdi story Also the ocs description is in the first chapter... More

A/N and Description
0.5) 1 MILLION DOLLARS?!?!
1) Not So Happy Campers Part 1
2) Not So Happy Campers Part 2
3) The Big Sleep
4) Dodgebrawl
5) Not Quite Famous
6) Sucky Outdoors
7) Phobia Factor
8) Up the Creek
9) Paintball Deer Hunter
10) If You Can't Take The Heat...
11) Who Can You Trust
12) Basic Straining
13) X-Treme Torture
14) Brunch of Disgustingness
15) No Pain, No Game
16) Search and Do Not Destroy
17) Hide And Be Sneaky
18) That's Off the Chain!
20) Wawanakwa Gone Wild
21) Trial by Tri-Armed Triathalon
22) Haute Camp-ture
24) Are We There Yeti?
25) I triple Dog Dare You!
26) The Very Last Episode, Really!
27) Total Drama, Drama, Drama, Drama Island!

19) Hook, Line and Screamer!

1.2K 51 7
By cerluvz

Cer's POV - Lindsay Eliminated
The day started off pretty different from what I'm used to. For one, it started at like 9 p.m.

I was awaken by the loudspeaker, followed by Chris telling us he had a "reward" for us.

You're probably wondering why I was asleep so late...Well, my sleep schedule has been messed since the last challenge. I sleep during the day and I'm only up at night.

Usually, i just listen to music or just stay in my room until I can fall asleep. Sometimes I would talk to some of the campers before they went to sleep.

So, yeah this really wasn't something I was used to.

But hey, there's one perk of all this. I got to do my hair yet again. It took pretty long considering I was improvising. It was my first time doing the style I did but I like it.

I stood up as I rubbed my eyes. I didn't feel like changing. So, I put my slippers on and fixed my hair.

Outfit:

I stretched my arms out, sighing after. Although my sleep schedule was completely f**ked, I was getting enough sleep each night.

I sighed once again as I joined up with the group. They were walking to wherever this "reward" was. Chris said that everything was already set up.

Of course, I decided to walk in the back. I was still pretty tired considering I just woke up.

Anyway, this "reward" was near the campfire. As we got closer, we noticed a huge theater screen and one chairs in front of it.

Everyone sat down and after a while, a movie started to play. From the looks of it, it was one of those horror films that featured a psycho killer and a dumb couple.

Static - Confessional
"I'm not usually one to get scared easily...okay, that's a lie. I'm scared of a lot of things and horror movies are one of the main things," I sighed.

"Most of them aren't scary. Everyone knows that. But the ones that are scary, literally give me nightmares. And that movie we watched will definitely give me nightmares," I exclaimed.

"It didn't help that these people were making jokes about something strange being on the island," I frowned.
Static - End

The movie was nearing its end and I could feel myself shaking. Luckily, I was behind everyone. So, no one noticed.

The rest of the campers seemed pretty calm, except for DJ. He was just as scared as I was. It didn't help that he was now the target of these maniacs ruthless pranks.

"He's coming out of the woods with a big hacky chainsaw!" Izzy smirked.
"That's so cool!"

"Oh no! Psycho killer man's going for the car!" Owen yelled.

"Yo! Fool couple! Stop makin' out and start the car!" Leshawna spoke.

"They're gonna be chainsaw sushi!"Izzy laughed.

With that, the boyfriend on the screen was slashed into bits and pieces until there was nothing but blood stains and pieces of flesh.

The girlfriend screamed and tried her absolute hardest to start the car while her boyfriend was being killed.

"Great Canadian cheese! Now the car won't start!" Owen yelled, standing up.

"Oh, man. I hate scary movies," DJ said, shaking.

"Run, the psycho's gonna get ya!" Izzy yelled, standing up as well.

DJ gasped as he moved behind his seat, trembling in fear. It took everything in me not to do the same thing he was doing.

Static - Confessional
"I would rather not have to deal with these people trying to scare me right now. I could literally feel myself shaking and my heart was racing," I groaned.
Static - End

"Here comes the blood fest!" Gwen smiled, standing up.

The girlfriend was now being turned into pieces as well. Her blood was all over the screen and her guts were everywhere.

The group just stared at the screen like what we were watching wasn't terrifying.

"Yeah! Right on!" Gwen yelled.

"Gross!"

"Aw, gross! Aw, the chainsaw psycho's going back to the woods! He's getting away! Yeah! Good ending! Izzy loves scary movies!" Izzy said, falling into Owen's arms.

"So does Owen," Owen smirked.

I was relieved when the movie finally turned off. I sighed as I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead. I, absolutely, hate being scared of things like this.

It's just a movie yet I was literally shaking in my seat. My sleep schedule is definitely going to be worse than it already is.

"Whoo. Am I ever glad that's over. I really hate scary movies," DJ sighed.

"Oh yeah? What scares you most? The, uh, part where everyone meets a grizzly death? Or the psycho killer with the hook?!" Duncan yelled out revealing his hand which has a hook on it.

DJ screamed and jumped behind Leshawna. Everyone stared at him before laughing.

Static - Confessional
"I know I said I understand DJ being scared but what Duncan just did wasn't scary. Corny? Yes. Scary? Definitely not."
Static - End

"Aw, c'mon, DJ. For a slasher flick, it was pretty tame," Gwen smirked.

"Yeah, there was hardly any hacking. Not like Bloodbath 2: Summer Camp Reign of Terror!" Duncan smiled.

"No way! That's my favorite movie! I love when the killer jams that guys hand into the lawnmower!"

I sighed as these two spoke. The movies they continued to speak about sounded terrifying and I, desperately, didn't want to hear anything about horror movies.

"Aww. Looks like Gwen and Duncan have more in common than bad fashion sense. It's just mindless guts and gore," Heather sassed.

"Horror movies aren't mindless."

"Yeah, they're loaded with psychological trauma. Heh, look at DJ," Duncan smiled.

"Whatever. Does anyone have any idea what our challenge will be this week?"

"Yeah. Where's the Chrismeister?" Geoff budded in.

"Why don't we go ask Chef?" I suggested, standing up. "Isn't that him on the docks?"

"Looks like it."

Everyone stood up and started walking to the docks. As we did, I felt my skin start to crawl. It felt like something was watching me...okay yeah the viewers were but it felt like someone else was.

Like someone was really on the island with us.

Static - Confessional
"That wouldn't happen though. Like there is no way someone can sneak in the island,...right?"
Static - End

I tried my hardest to brush off the feeling. I thought my mind was just playing tricks on me or someone was just trying to punk us.

We got to the docks and Chef was putting luggage into the losers boat. He was moving pretty fast.

"Hey yo, Chef! Where's the fire?" Duncan asked.

Chef stared at him with complete fear in his eyes. He didn't say anything. All he did was run on to the boat. Chris, who was driving, started the boat and they rode off.

"Dude! You forgot this!" Owen yelled out.

As he did, a newspaper fell out of the bag. Owen picked it up and stared at it before reading it out loud to the group.

"Escaped psycho killer on the loose. Be on the lookout for a man wearing a hockey mask with a hooked hand and carrying a chainsaw."

"Haha! He's on the loose!" Izzy laughed.

Everyone stared at Owen in horror.

Static - Confessional
"This is like so fake. Even if it wasn't, The producers will keep us safe,...right? Like we won't be stranded here will a psycho killer, right?"
Static - End

"Oh, come on! They don't expect us to fall for this. Scary movie followed by hasty exit followed by strategically placed lame prop?" Heather fumed.

"I don't know. He looked pretty spooked," DJ trembled.

"Puh-lease. It's all part of their little stunt to freak us out."

"If this was a stunt, would Chris leave behind his...hair gel?" Owen gasped.

The group looked around at each other. As they did, I started to notice how tense everyone looked (not including Heather).

"Whoa. This is for real!" Gwen said.

"So let me get this straight. Chris left us for dead and now we're alone while that escaped psycho killer with the chainsaw is on the loose?"

"No. We're alone while that escaped psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook is on the loose!" Duncan yelled revealing the hook yet again.

"I told you, dude! Not funny!" DJ yelled after screaming in fear.

"Ugh! Neither is your Chicken Little routine! Get a grip, bro," Leshawna said.

"I can't help it. I feel like we're being watched."

"Duh. It's a reality show. We're always being watched," Heather sassed.

"Okay so, say this is real, what exactly are we supposed to do? We're sitting ducks with nothing and no one to defend us," I asked, still pretty spooked.

"Cer's right. Without anyone here to help us, we should figure it out ourselves. We need a game plan," Gwen replied.

"Yeah, yeah, we need a game plan," DJ agreed.

"You little frightwigs might need a game plan, but I need a facial," Heather said.

"Are you crazy? First rule of slasher films, never go off alone!"

"I might actually listen to you if I were in a movie. We're being punked. You're so gullible. Hey! Chris! If you're listening, next time, rent one that takes place at a summer camp!"

"...you're kidding, right?"

"If you losers wanna hang around and play 'boogie man', go ahead. But I have got a date with exfoliation," Heather said, walking to her cabin.

"And the bossy mean chick seals her fate," Izzy laughed.

"How am I not surprised?"

"Okay look. I say we go back to camp and talk strategy. Who's in?" Gwen asked before walking back to camp.

Leshawna, Duncan, DJ, Geoff and I all followed her. Izzy and Owen decided to wander off somewhere.

Static - Confessional
"It was nice knowing them. Everyone knows that the couple that wanders off, dies first. It's so obvious."
Static - End

Everyone sat down around the bonfire as Gwen lit it with Duncan's lighter. She thought for a second before looking up at us and sighing.

"For now our best bet is staying together. There is no way this killer can get all of us at once. To insure that we do this, I have a few rules to help us out," Gwen started.

"Do tell."

"Okay. Rule number one, do not go off on your own. Rule number two, if you do go off on your own, never go in the woods! Rule number three, if you do go in the woods, never ever ever make out in the woods or you will die in the woods!...Where's Izzy and Owen?" She asked, looking around.

"Breaking rules one through three," Duncan smirked.

"...Okay, Leshawna, can you come with me to the cabin? I have to get something," Gwen asked.

"Sure, come on."

With that, the two walked off to the cabins. I sighed as I put my head in my hands. My body had stopped shaking but I could still feel my heart beating out of my chest.

"Looks like someone's scared," Duncan said from beside me.

"Do I look scared to you?" I replied, sitting up.

"Yeah, you do...Don't tell me you believe this crap?"

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't."

"You're actually scared of the escaped psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook?" He smirked, revealing the hook yet again.

"...Geoff, let's switch seats. Please," I sighed, looking over at him.

"No way, dude. I'm fine over here," he smiled.

"Oh, come on. I'm just having fun," Duncan complained.

"...Please, Geoff. I'll give you all my food for a week."

"So, you're ignoring me now?" He questioned.

"...DJ, switch with me, please," I sighed.

"Tsk, whatever," he dismissed, rolling his eyes.

We sat in silence. The only thing in my mind right now was this "psycho killer." I mean, come on. The producers would never leave us alone with that guy.

Although I wanted to believe that, a part of me thought that I would die tonight. Everyone knows that black people in horror movies die first.

Well, I don't think I'd die first.

I can out-run some of the people here. And if I can't, I would grab onto someone so I don't die alone. But the point still stands.

I was terrified.

After a few minutes, Geoff and DJ walked off. They told us that DJ had to use the bathroom and Geoff was going to be a look out.

"And then, there were two," Duncan smirked.

"Stop joking. Everyone will be back," I sighed.

"Sure sure. Everyone knows that going off in groups of two only seals your fate."

"What makes you say that?"

"At least one person in the pair is a chicken and will bail on their partner."

"Uh huh, so you wouldn't be upset if the killer started charging at us and I pushed you in front of him to save myself?"

"I wouldn't be upset. I'm pretty sure I can take him," he smirked.

"You think you can take a killer? Seriously?"

"I know I can take a killer."

"I'd like to see you try."

"How about we go find him?"

"...excuse me?"

"Come on, Cer," he smirked, standing up.
"We go find him and I'll challenge him. It'll be fun."

"I would rather not die tonight. So, we should stay here," I declined, rolling my eyes.

"You can stay here alone then," Duncan suggested, walking away.

I thought about it for a second.

If I die, I'd rather be with someone than be alone. And seeing Duncan in a fight might be pretty entertaining.

It might just be the last fight I ever see tho...At least I get to die knowing my idiot boyfriend tried to fight off a killer. I guess, that's pretty comforting.

I sighed and stood up. I caught up with Duncan and grabbed his hand. I felt afraid in that moment. Being at the campfire surrounded by everyone kinda helped me calm down.

But right now, all my fears had came back. I could feel my heart start beating out of my chest and my body start to shake. Unfortunately, Duncan noticed my body start to tense up.

Static - Confessional
"I'm sure you can all tell how much I hate being scared. It's like your worse fears haunting you AND you're vulnerable. That's, like, the worse combination ever," I complained.
Static - End

"Where exactly are we going?" I asked as Duncan lead us to the darker part of the woods.

"Just trust me, okay?"

"That's not an answer."

"We're almost there. Just be patient."

I sighed yet again. I decided to wait and see where he was leading us.

As we walked deeper into the woods, I could feel my skin start to crawl. It was dark as hell. The only light seen was from the moon.

I tried my hardest to distract myself but that's kind of hard when there's a killer on the loose and you're in the woods. That's a terrible combo.

After a few minutes, Duncan stopped and leaned up against the tree. He grabbed some sticks and used his lighter to set the ends of them on fire.

Once the sticks were lit, I noticed a carving in the tree. It was of a small heart. I remembered making the carving. I had done it a few weeks ago.

I moved a bit closer to the heart and noticed our initials inside of it. Mine had a small smiley face above it and Duncan's had a tiny skull under his.

"I don't remember adding your initial," I smirked.

"I added it."

"After I left?"

"Yup. Thought it could use a bit more spice."

"Wow. I didn't think you would do something as cheesy as this but I like it."

"Glad you do," he smirked, wrapping his hands around my waist.

"You do realize we're still on the run from a literally killer, right?"

"We have time for one kiss, though."

"Yeah, no. We can do that after we survive," I smiled, grabbing his hand and walking back towards camp.

As we walked, we got to the light side of the woods. I could feel myself calm down as we did. Duncan's little gesture helped out a lot, I must say.

Yes, it was cheesy but it was cute at the same time. I was, honestly, pretty flattered but who wouldn't be? Everyone knows carving your initials into a tree mean you'll last pretty long.

Ask every romance movie that has childhood lovers in it. They'll tell you that I'm right.

Anyway, we eventually made it to the cabins. I started making my way to the campfire up until Duncan stopped me.

"I'll be right back. I think I forgot my lighter in the woods."

"Alright. I can go with you if you want."

"Now, who's the one worrying too much?" He teased.

"...I'm starting to hope you lose this fight," I shrugged, walking to the campfire.

When I got there, Gwen was standing next to this drawing. She looked pretty pissed off.

The drawing had all of us on it and everyone had an "X" on them.

Before I could say anything to Gwen, she kicked over a bucket and stormed away from the campfire.

Now, I was here. Alone.

I could have gone after her but something in me told me not to. I sat down on one of the seats and sighed.

I had accepted my fate at that moment. This will be the day that I die, I thought.

After a few minutes, my skin started to crawl yet again. By this time, the fire had started going out and the darkness got closer and closer.

I looked around for some more sticks and as I did, I heard, "Cer, Cer, Cer," in the distance.

I stood still for a moment as my heart sank.

"Okay, that's probably just my mind playing tricks on me. No biggie," I smiled, nervously.

I continued to look for more sticks but the voice repeated itself.

That's when I stood up. As I did, something jumped out of the bushes. I turned around and ran as fast as I could. It didn't really help, though.

The faster I got, the faster the thing got. I could have sworn I was going to die. I mean, why else would this thing be chasing me?

As I ran further and further, I felt my body start to ache. My legs felt like they were on fire.

Before I could react to anything else going on, the thing appeared in front of me. I tried my hardest to get away (after screaming, of course) but the thing grabbed me.

I closed my eyes as I waited to be killed but instead, I ended up in a tent filled with surveillance screens. All the other campers, along with Chris, were here.

"Cerberus, wasn't really expecting you to last as long as you did but hey, nice job!" Chris smirked.

"...wait, this was a challenge? Are you kidding me?!"

"Yeah, Chef here punked you good."

"I should've just stayed asleep," I sighed, rubbing my head.

"I don't think you want to be sleep for our next victim," Chris said, sitting at the screen.

I decided to watch whoever was next. It's a lot better than sitting there regretting it coming to this stupid show.

The next person was Duncan. He was at the docks waiting for this "killer," who had been chanting his name, to show up.

The "killer" slowly walked onto the docks and Duncan just smirked.

"Mother of pearl! He's going to face off with the escaped psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook!" Owen yelled out.

"Oh, this is gonna be fun. Come and get it, goalie boy," Duncan smirked, lifting a chair.

He threw it and the "killer" used the chainsaw to cut it in half. Next, he threw a canoe. Then, a life jacket. Then, he threw a surfboard.

As he got closer, Duncan looked around. After a few seconds, a fish hit his hockey mask. They stood stood in silence staring at the flopping fish who was now on the ground.

"What? I ran out of stuff to throw," Duncan shrugged.

The "killer" raise his chainsaw causing Duncan to scream and trip. When he opened his eyes, he saw that the chainsaw went through the docks.

He kicked it off of the hockey stick it was once taped to and rolled his eyes. The "killer" put his hook up. Before he could do anything, Duncan cut it off with the chainsaw.

"Thought you could scare me? Ha! Now let's see who's behind the mask!"

Static - Confessional
"Times like these make me wonder: how can people be so fearless in such scary situations? It makes no sense. Like, you think you're about to die and your first instinct is to fight your possible killer?"
Static - End

"Someone lose this?" Duncan smirked as he walked into the tent with Chef's mask.

The camper cheered and clapped for Duncan as he walked it.

"Way to go, Duncan!" Izzy smiled. "Hey, coolio! Gwen's taking on the psycho all by herself! Oh ho ho!"

"Wait a sec. If Chef's in here, then who's in the lodge with Gwen?!"

"Holy Lola! It's the real escaped psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook!" Owen yelled.

Everyone looked at each other before bolting out of the tent. A few of us yelled out for Gwen to give her an early warning but that didn't really work.

"This could be really, really good for ratings or really, really bad for lawsuits!" Chris panted.

We continued running to the other side of the island, still yelling out for Gwen. Once we made it there, we ran into the cafe.

"Gwen! He's the real escaped psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook!"

"What?"

The real Psycho killer raised his hook and chainsaw in front of Gwen. She screamed and kicked the killer in the face.

"Ow! Oh, that was totally uncalled for! Man, I am so out of here! I was treated way better in prison!" The Psycho killer said as he left.

"...what the actual fu-"


𝚃𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝚂𝚔𝚒𝚙

"Hahaha, well, it's obvious to everyone that Gwen wins invincibility. And sadly, it's equally unanimous that DJ walk the Dock of Shame.
Since he was the only one who screamed and bolted without the escaped psycho killer even being there. But...no hard feelings, dude. You will be missed," Chris frowned.

"Aww, group hug!"

Everyone stood up and walked over to DJ. I have to admit, that was one of the best hugs I have ever gotten.

Afterwards, everyone followed behind him to the Docks of Shame. We all said our goodbyes as the boat of losers rode off.


𝙱𝚘𝚗𝚞𝚜 𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞

I was sitting on the stairs of the cabin. I couldn't sleep get any sleep yet again. Not cause I wasn't tired. I was. Being scared for hours on end was actually tiring.

It wasn't because I couldn't sleep. I had actually been asleep a few times prior to me coming out here.

It was because I kept getting nightmares. I know the "killer" was just Chef but think about it. Some random guy managed to sneak on the island and almost kill Gwen.

By the looks of it, I was the only one that cared and was actually spooked by that fact. Let's not forget he is still somewhere on the island.

Can you believe that?

Every time I tried to sleep, I would dream about him actually hurt us and what now while we were asleep. I would still be in my bed if I was so tired of the nightmares.

Now, you're probably wondering. Where's Duncan?

He's inside. He tried to scare me and he succeeded. So, I pour some water on him after screaming my head off.

He walked out of the cabin in a different pair of pajamas before sitting next to me.

"I can't believe you did that."

"That's your own fault for scaring me, you idiot," I shrugged.

"I thought it'd be funny."

"Thinking, clearly, isn't your strong suit."

"I'm, seriously, rubbing off on you. You weren't this mean when we met."

"I'm not mean. I'm, like, the nicest person I know."

"Whatever you say, Cer."

"Shouldn't you be going to sleep or something?"

"If I do, who'll keep you entertained?"

"I don't need to be entertained. Plus, I've been alone while staying up before."

"Fine, I'm bored and I'm pretty awake right now. So, why not bother you and have some fun?"

"Uh huh, what do you have in mind?"

"Remember Chef's road hog?"

"Yeah, why?"

"He fixed it up after Heather took it apart. So, hope you know how to drive this thing," he smirked, throwing me the keys.

"Oh, you're crazy."

"Come on. It'll be a lot more fun than us sitting here all night."

"I feel like I'm going to regret this..."

"You might but who cares?"


𝚃𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝚂𝚔𝚒𝚙

"How did you even manage to do this!?" I yelled.

We had been taking turns on the bike for hours. It was pretty fun, I must say. Chef's bike was pretty fast.

I was having a good time up until Duncan somehow managed to drive into the ocean with us on it.

"I don't really know and stop yelling! You'll get us caught."

"You don't think the broken and wet bike will get us caught?"

"As long as we hide it, he can never prove it was us."

"I'm in a relationship with an idiot," I sighed.

As I did, some water was splashed in my direction. I gasped as I felt the cold water hit my face.

I looked over at Duncan and noticed him smirking.

"How dare you!" I yelled splashing back.

The rest of the night went in like this. He did lose that splash fight, though. It's sad but hey, at least I won.

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