Blaise Beck-Day
Present
"So– you left and came back– did you lose your ability to see the nuts that were all over that pie?"
Rolling my eyes at my dad's remark, I reached for my glass of water sipping at it as Naomi and Rory left the table abruptly. I assumed they were chasing after Sage who had bolted after grabbing my plate and slamming it on her own.
"My bad."
The only two words I could utter as I continued to drink the water in front of me. Maybe if I continued to drink this water, I would drown myself out of the confusion I was fighting off. Who the hell was this girl?
I pushed my chair back before exiting the dining room where everyone sat. I would be lying if I said I was avoiding a few people at this dinner table but nothing says welcome home like a big feast. I walked into the living room, one that hadn't changed at all since I was little.
So many pictures, trophies– anything you could think of was all over this house. Everyone was so happy. Families looked better together than apart. A friendship that had lasted over decades– there was nothing that I could do but run away rather than carry the guilt on my back.
"You little shit you knew there were nuts in there. I know you did," I blinked slowly staring up at my mom who had shrunk a good five inches since Christmas. As she walked toward me, I couldn't hide my smile as her obnoxiously loud heels slapped against the hardwood floor.
I shrugged.
I did.
"You and your dad are so alike it's disgusting." Yeah.
"You knew that had nuts! What were you thinking!" I thought that Sage doesn't give a shit about me anymore and she did a great job at lying about it. Nothing says I still care about you like a death scare.
She sat down next to me, crossing one leg over the other. She laid her head on my shoulder. "It's been hard–" She swallowed. "Without you– you know?"
"I'm sorry, mom." She cranked her head to the side to look at me and she let out a sigh of disapproval. "But you aren't. I mean, you don't act like you are!" Her words were filled with disappointment.
And the last thing I would ever want was for my mom to be disappointed in me. I didn't want either of my parents to be disappointed in me. Or to lose Sage. I didn't want any of that– ever.
"I'll change mom, I'll be better."
"I don't want you to change, Blaise. I just want you to stay home. I don't want you to leave, I don't want you to hate coming back here. You won't even tell us why you left– I just need to know, was it me? Was it me and daddy–"
"Gross. Please stop referring to him as that."
She batted her eyelashes. "I'm sorry, Blaise. You are my miracle baby and I don't want you to go away ever again for that long. Please don't go away again." She brushed my hair with her hand. She looked me in the eyes, her own were glossy and I felt my heart beating slower.
God. It would have been easier to just stay in Paris.
"Enough of me! What is up with the tattoos?" She asked, a smile appearing on her face. I chuckled, "I got bored."
She hummed. "Your father told me about the one above your knee." Well, it was more like on my knee.
"Yeah."
"Have you tried to talk to her yet?"
Yes, I have tried to talk to Sage. But the issue is that Sage doesn't want to speak to me. Sage still cares about me– I found that out using physiological warfare, but she doesn't want to speak to me. We are on the right path.
"We had to replace every pillow on your bed after two weeks of you leaving, you know that? Her tears had actually ruined the pillows. She would come over, and just go up to your room and cry. She would leave, and come back crying. Every day. It lasted for months,"
I cleared my throat.
"I don't want to talk about it, mom."
"But you just left! How do you just leave someone like her!"
A throat cleared and my eyes met him in the doorway.
"Hiding from me?"
Reese's voice teased as he walked over to the couch that was adjacent to us. He wore a Penn State Polo as he plopped down and kicked his feet up. Mom laughed before chucking a pillow at him.
"Never hiding," I muttered.
Mom looked at me, her forehead scrunched up in confusion. I sat up, getting ready to stand up. "Never hiding– but just running, right?" I offered him a look of warning before mom stood up next to me.
"My baby boy is as tall as his father– and is as tattooed as his father. He's all grown up, isn't he?" Mom pinched my arm as Reese laughed.
"All grown up and looking like the perfect football player." I squinted at him.
Before I could tell him to shut the fuck up, we were interrupted by Baker, Drew, Leighton, and Slater trudging in. "Football? As in soccer? How the hell did that even happen anyway?" Baker asked as he walked over toward his dad and slapped his legs. Reese just glared at him and pointed to the other available seating.
"Yeah. Thirty million dollar professional soccer player my ass. How the hell was it that easy for you?" Leighton added on.
I shrugged. "Just a born athlete."
Slater's eyes met mine after I uttered the sentence. "Not for every sport though." He spoke back.
I nodded. "Right."
"You joining our soccer team here? Benji would be thrilled." Drew, who was still chewing a hotdog nearly choked as he laughed at Baker's comment.
I shook my head. "No, I can't. I'm already signed to a contractual agreement that is nonvoid. I can't play for another league." My dad entered the room as I finished speaking.
"Great. So you can't play soccer, what are you going to do for the school year?" I released a deep breath. Shrugging my shoulders, I went to answer but I was cut off.
"My teams always open." Reese was taunting me.
I cleared my throat. "Maybe I'll go help coach the soccer team." I wanted off this conversation topic. "What are you guys doing tonight?" I asked.
Baker let out a loud laugh. "What aren't we doing tonight! Man! Big party at our new place to celebrate Slater's birthday! You in?" Drew, who was done chewing leaned over and fist-bumped his best friend.
"It's someone else's birthday too," Ellie announced walking into the room with a dish of ice cream in her hands. She leaned over the couch and handed it to Reese. As she handed off the ice cream, the front door opened down the hallway, and then footsteps were heard.
My heart started to pound– so fast, so hard, so out of my chest. God, who was she? As she walked into the room, my eyes just trailed up her. She didn't wear glasses anymore? No braces? She filled out– she was not the same girl.
Mentally.
Emotionally.
Physically.
Her eyes avoided mine as she walked to Drew, collapsing in his lap. Oh?
I watched as her fingernails which were not– dirty with soil– traced patterns in his hair. He didn't react at all, he didn't even stare at her. How the hell could you not stare at her? I mean, she looks breathtaking.
"You in? Beer, music, bitc–"
"Baker Joseph," Ellie warned.
"Ladies– Beer, music, well respected beautiful classy ladies, hot tub, swimming pool, fire pit! Come to the party!" Baker corrected himself. I chuckled before shrugging my shoulders, I don't know if I'm feeling up for a party.
"Are you throwing a party?" Sage asked. My ears perked up, hearing her voice.
"Yeah," Slater answered, a grunt in his voice.
"Why wasn't I invited?" She asked, sitting up straight on Drew's lap. Slater shook his head. "Because you never went to parties before. You didn't like going to them."
"Okay. Well, now I do."
Slater furrowed his eyebrows. "You want to come to a party that's filled to the brim with drunk college boys and hot girls? Sage– have you ever even been to a party? Other than the birthday party when you had dad pick you up crying–"
"Hey! Asshole! Shut up!" Naomi entered the room yelling at her son, walking over to my mom, and sitting down.
"Drew, Baker– am I allowed to come to your house for the party?" Baker, Drew, and Slater all lived together? What genius thought of that idea?
She looked up at Drew, batting her eyelashes so affectionately at him I wanted to rip his face off. Are they together? What the fuck happened while I was gone? She has boobs, she has a plump ass, she has a nose piercing, a belly button piercing, and she parties now?
"I don't mind. We have a spare room anyways." Baker belched after speaking. I felt Reese's eyes on me as he spooned in another mouthful of ice cream. Right, a spare room.
"Great. I'll be there," Sage smiled at her cousin.
"So will I." My neck snapped as I turned to face Rory, a girl who I had never met before but now I think she will be around all of the time. She had a bow in her hair pulling it back so it was half up and half down.
Naomi clapped her hands in delight. "Oh, this is so great! I remember when Sloane and I went to our first college party together! Sloane let's go tonight! Show all these young kids how to funnel a beer!"
"No." We all uttered.
"Blaise, you in?" Slater's voice grumbles out the question. I clear my throat, "I'll think about it." But in all reality, I was going. If I had any chance of just talking to her– I wanted to go. I wanted to talk to her, and just see how she was doing.
"Well, it's like eight-thirty now. We better head back to make sure we have everything ready." I watched as Drew rubbed circles on her knee before she slid off of him and walked toward my mom and hers.
The boys– minus Slater– walked up to me, giving me short hugs before walking out of the room. Reese got off the couch and walked into the kitchen where I knew the rest of the parents were.
I went to take a step towards Sage, but a body was placed in front of me.
I raised my eyebrows at the cheerful voice. "Hi, I'm Aurora, but you can call me Rory. I am deeply sorry for almost committing involuntary manslaughter. How could I ever make it up to you?" I blinked hard and fast at her words.
"Maybe a different pie? I read once in a magazine that your favorite pie is cherry. Would you like that?" My eyes moved to the girl who was giggling about something with my mom's arms wrapped around her.
"If you are going to sue me from Paris, just know that I can't leave the country I do not have a passport. Sue me in at least six months so I can file for the passport this week." My eyes looked back down at the girl who was wearing way too much pink. She looked like a strawberry yogurt machine had exploded.
"Um, I'm good. Nice to meet you, Rory. No harm, no foul. Yeah?" I offered her a small smile.
I stepped aside from her, walking to the small circle where my mom and her mom stood talking to her. My mom's eyes met mine and she offered a small smile. I stood right next to Sage, our fingertips practically touching, and as they slowly brushed against each other, she pulled her arms up to her chest crossing them over each other.
"I'm going to go get ready." She tried to quickly exit the situation.
I caught her arm, finally touching her. "Hey, can we talk before you go?" My question rang out. She gave me a look of amazement before shaking her head.
"I'm actually busy right now." Her fingers grabbed my forearm and removed my touch from her. "Bye mom, bye Sloane. Let's go, Rory," I watched as she became flustered and ran away from me.
I turned to face the two women who gave me a look of bewilderment. First, I looked at my mom and then gained the courage to look at Naomi. "Blaise," Naomi spoke my name as I nodded.
"Hi, Naomi, nice to see you." It wasn't a moment later that she was wrapping her arms around me, squeezing me in a hug.
If only her daughter's reaction was the same.
"Why are you home– why did you leave!" She pulled away from me, slapping my chest. I frowned, noticing the tears in her eyes. "I mean, I am glad you are home because Slater misses you, more than he would like to admit."
I slowly blinked.
"Does she hate me?" My voice cracked as I asked the question. I never meant for her to hate me, I just meant for her to miss me. From a distance. Until after everyone graduated from college.
Naomi shook her head. "Of course not. But it's going to take some convincing on her end for her to even give you a chance to explain."
"What the hell even happened to her?" I asked, flailing my arms in the air. A deep chuckle was heard behind me as someone settled into the couch. I turned to see my dad and Matti sitting on the couch sharing apple slices.
"You left you, idiot," Dad muttered.
"He passed me in Instagram followers, did I say that was okay?" Matti's question was teasing as my dad swallowed his apple. "Me too! And I was the president!" They laughed together on the couch as Naomi and my mom sighed.
"Are you going to go to that party tonight, baby?" Mom asked as I shrugged.
"I don't know. I'm not really into that party stuff," Matti snorted at my answer.
"Bullshit. She has magazines of your face plastered all over the front of them of you entering and exiting clubs." She has magazines? Of me?
"Matti–"
"Go to that party, be a man, and apologize!" My eyes widened.
"Mattison–"
"No! I don't know if this is like karma or something coming to bite me in the ass but the ass has been bitten, go apologize." It was coming. I was being swallowed whole on the inside. I was being swallowed, and I hated confrontation.
"Calm down, man." My dad patted Matti's legs before standing up, wrapping one arm around my shoulders, and walking with me out of the room.
Natalie and Griffin's house hadn't changed one bit. And I think the familiarity was the only thing keeping me sane at the moment because I was one moment away from collapsing into a puddle of tears.
Things had changed. Life had changed. My emotions had changed. I was now a boy who felt too much on the inside while on the outside trying to keep my composure and keep cool. Unfortunately, that meant I shut out a lot of people. Unfortunately, it meant I had to leave everything behind rather than talk my feelings out.
We stepped outside of the house and walked toward the car I bought for this trip because that's all it was for me– a trip. A trip that had an expiration date because whether I wanted to leave her again or not, I already booked a one-way ticket out of here.
"You gotta tell me what's going on. Two years with no answers? You can't say it's because of Stella's wedding either. Why are you back and why did you leave? Tell me. Now– if you're in trouble, tell me."
My palms were clammy. My heart was racing, and I was starting to sweat. I was going to have a meltdown. Something that happened a lot whenever I was alone in Paris. I swallowed trying to salivate in my mouth, my mouth was becoming dry.
"I just can't talk about it yet, okay?" I spoke. "I'm not in trouble. I'm just trying to find the right words."
His eyes filled with rage. "You've had two years! Two years! Two years of me holding your mom while she cries because she misses you! Two years of me crying and trying to hold myself together because I miss you. Why are you back!"
And then I exploded.
"I'm back because I miss her and I made a mistake about not keeping in contact with her. Okay? That's why I am back." He let out a laugh before taking a step back from me.
"Go to that party tonight and talk to her and when you're ready come talk to me. I can't deal without the 'no answers' answer anymore." I huffed out a deep breath.
"Listen, if she won't listen to me tonight then I'm going to cancel my lease and head back to Paris. I just needed to check on her." She looks like she is doing fine without me. She looks amazing.
A finger was shoved in the center of my chest. "You aren't leaving. You're here for the semester don't be a little bitch, Blaise." He turned on his heels and walked away from me.
"Je suis content que tu aies le tatouage sur ta rotule parce que c'est exactement là où tu seras quand tu demanderas pardon." He bitched under his breath as he walked away from me.
I'm glad you got the tattoo on your kneecap because that's exactly where you'll be when you ask for forgiveness.
I entered the car, slamming the door and then punching the steering wheel multiple times as I watched him walk into the house, disappointment for his son surrounding him. That's exactly what I wanted to avoid and what I never wanted.
I pulled out my phone and scrolled through the missed messages from Mannon. Would it be bad if I just left this country now? Just bolted and never came back? Never talked to anyone ever again?
I turned on the sportscar and reverse in the driveway. The sun was setting in the sky as I pulled into my apartment that was within walking distance from the boy's house. I quickly ran up to the apartment and grabbed a hoodie.
As I walked down the semi-crowded streets of State College I realized that this place hadn't changed one bit. Maybe it was just me who changed? Just the thought of it was enough to send me spiraling.
"Blaise!" A voice yelled my name, sprinting up right next to me. The man was out of breath and I recognized him right away.
"Hey Benji," I smiled at him.
"Oh my gosh– you remembered who I am!" He squealed while trying to keep up with my footsteps. "Hey! I was thinking, would you like to come to our soccer practice?" I cranked my head to stare at him as he smiled.
"I mean, I'm only the waterboy but I would love to have you there." I couldn't help the smile that was tracing my lips. At least someone was excited to see me.
"Um, yeah. When is it?" Shock was written all over his face.
"Monday. Five o'clock. Do you have classes then?" Oh shit. That's right. I was at college, I had to register for those still.
"I'll be there."
"Thank you so much. Maybe I'll be promoted to the golf cart driver. Where are you headed to?" He asked.
I hummed in amusement, "A party, want to come?"
He gaped at me. "Of course–" He gasped. "Where?"
"The football house. Ever heard of it?" He nodded. "Yes, I've never been invited to those parties though. I can't wait." He and that Rory girl would be perfect for each other.
We walked together toward the party which certainly had more than two hundred people there. Holy shit. "They just renovated this house. It's amazing now," Benji explained. I could tell. It had a garden– wow– my dad's house never had a garden.
As we walked up to the front door, I felt everyone's eyes on me. I used to have meltdowns over that but now that I've gotten used to it– It's like a breeze. My eyes swept over the people, but none of them were her.
"Who are you looking for?" Benji asked.
I ignored his question as I walked further into the house, I was getting random handshakes and pats on the back. Benji smiled and greeted everyone, enjoying the attention as I made my way through the crowd. I reached the windows and found her.
"Benji, why don't you get us drinks?" I asked as he nodded. I told him I wanted a beer and the pointed toward the backyard. Where she should with a pair of shorts on and a black bikini top.
Jesus.
I walked down the backdoor steps and reached the patio. She stood near the pool house, looking at something on her phone. She had a drink in hand, but she stood by herself. She always was by herself unless she was with me.
She was an introvert so why the hell was she so adamant to party?
I quietly snuck up behind her, eyeing the poolhouse doorknob.
Okay. I could do this.
I wrapped my arm around her bare stomach and threw open the door. She screeched as I slammed it behind us.
She panicked, her breathing erratic as she met my eyes, and then—they were filled with anger.
"What the hell are you doing!" She yelled.
I raised my eyebrows. "I wanted to talk."
Her mouth dropped open. "Are you stupid? I don't want to talk to you! I'd rather throw myself in front of a moving vehicle than talk to you!" She was furious.
"Well you don't have to talk– just listen."
"Sorry–I don't listen to assholes or deadbeats." My eyes widened before a laugh left my mouth.
"What happened to you?" I asked the girl who was cursing more than she ever had in her life.
"What the fuck do you mean what happened to me? What happened to you!" She was screaming.
She shoved my chest, pushing me back against the door and I couldn't help but laugh at the five-foot-four girl who had just technically hit me with a door. The door method is something that she had sworn by our entire life.
"You need to leave and never come back here ever again." She warned.
But god, it was so good to just hear her speak to me again. I missed her looking at me. I missed her touch. I missed her voice. I missed her.
"I can't do that."
"Yes, you can. You've done it before. You need to leave this country and leave me alone." My hands went to her face, brushing her hair out of her eyes.
"Don't touch me!"
"What happened? I know I left. I'm sorry. But I'm back now. I'm not leaving, what happened? Why are you like this?" I muttered.
She didn't answer me though, she just shrugged my touch off of her face and looked at me with her big eyes.
"Qu'est-il arrivé? Qu'est-ce qui ne va pas chenille?"
What happened? What's wrong caterpillar?
"What's wrong is that my foot is going to be up your ass in a second if you don't let me out of this room. I don't want to be near you. I didn't miss you. Are you surprised, baby?" She mocked me.
"You missed me. And you care about me."
"I fucking hate you."
"It has nuts." I mocked her and her tone from earlier. She furrowed her eyebrows.
"Saving your life and caring about you are two different things. Now move, and don't bug me again for the rest of the night."
I was going to continue to pester her but as soon as I saw the tears, I stepped away. With a sigh, I watched as she opened the door. With one foot in and one foot out, she froze. She sucked in a deep breath before speaking.
"Did you ever plan on writing me back?"
I had no clue how to answer her.
And after a minute of silence, she muttered the words 'forget it' and stepped completely out. I watched her walk away and I trailed after the girl who was now a beautiful woman. She was alone at this party? Not on my watch.
"For what it's worth, I am sorry for leaving."
I apologized but she just shook her head and continued to walk away from me. She walked toward the hot tub. In the hot tub sat Drew, Slater, and three girls who I had never met in my life but none of them were Sage. None of them were even worth looking at because she put every single girl to shame.
"Hey, sorry I'm late." She apologized before sitting her feet in the water right next to Drew. She sat her ass on the edge, her shorts still on while he grabbed onto one of her legs with his wet arm. Slater tensed up not only because of the way that asshole was grabbing his sister, but because he saw me taking my shirt off, following with my pants.
"What the hell do they feed you guys over there?" Baker came up behind me, squeezing my ass as he got on Sage's other side.
I stared into Sage's eyes as I slowly moved my hands to the buttons of my jeans and zipper before letting them drop. I dropped myself into the hot tub and hooked my arms around the sides of it. I perked one eyebrow up at her, hinting at her to say anything.
"Can you believe our parents used to play truth or dare at these parties?" Baker asked after taking a long swing of his beer. Benji still hadn't found me yet, so when Slater shockingly offered me a sip of his, I took it.
"That shit is so lame. Can you imagine being in college and playing a game like that?" Slater laughed through his words.
"That's almost as lame as like being dared to have your first kiss at a fucking eighth-grade party." Drew laughed before readjusting the grip on his beer.
I watched as Sage chewed on her cheek, swallowing her thoughts as he just outed what had happened to her. Of course, he didn't know it, I knew it.
Because we were each other's first kiss.
"I love that outfit you have on," Drew looked up at Sage, smiling at her as she winked down at him.
"Thanks, I wore it just for you." She rested a palm against his clavicle. Were they together? I didn't think so. I mean, I would have been told. If they were together, he wasn't doing a good job because she was still messaging me.
"Shame," I muttered.
The hot tub went quiet.
Sage hummed at my one-worded sentence. My eyes trailed from the water, up to her as I gave her a smirk.
"You wouldn't have to wear anything for me."
I watched as she froze, her eyes icing over. I felt Slater flick my temple as Baker let out a loud laugh. "Oh shittttt, he came back with the moves. You naughty boy."
"Sorry, I'm late. I got caught up with this guy named Benji, here's your beer Blaise." I turned to face Rory, a smile on her face as she approached the hot tub. There was no more room in the hot tub but it didn't matter to her.
As soon as the beer was in my hand, she climb in and landed on Slater's lap. He raised his eyebrows at the very outspoke girl who wore a pink bikini. Sage's face landed in her palms before sighing. "You're Aurora– right?" Slater asked.
She nodded, "Yep. Like the princess."
Baker mocked her words before reaching over and clinking his beer with mine. "To a good semester?" He asked and I nodded.
"To a great semester." I stared into Sage's eyes when I said it.
Hey besties!
I hope you enjoyed the chapter!
If you were at the Discord hangout— I had so much fun playing games with you guys and answering questions!
I always get asked this question so I'll say it again:
The book will ALWAYS be present/past UNTIL the reason he left is revealed!
I am SORRY if you do not like the past, I really do try to make them good. If you do not like reading them then the ODD chapters are the chapters you should read because they are present!
The past is the only way I feel like you would experience the plot unveiling the best!
I love you all so so much! Thanks for everything!
Keep your voices loud and heard— I love you guys and to my American besties we are in this together, fuck the Supreme Court <3 !