Louis watched as all the color drained from his younger boyfriends. The open horror and fear in his boyfriends' eyes were almost too much for the oldest to cope with, but he tried his best to keep his mask of calm in place. He needed to stay strong for the others. He owed that to them after what he'd done. It was his fault they were here. If he had not mess with Zayn at the signing, then no one would have known anything. Zayn would not have gotten hate from everyone.
Louis gritted his teeth and looked back up at his boyfriends, noticing that all three wore expressions of panic.
"No" Harry breathed, looking equally as pale as the oldest. "No, he- why? Why did he do this? We were here for him. How could we be so stupid? so blind?"
Louis felt his throat aching with the suppressed emotion, and swallowed painfully. "I do not know, Love. We all thought he was getting better. I can not believe we let it come to this. What happens if we lose him?" He said seriously.
Liam's head snapped up and he took a deep breath. Louis was relieved to see that the mask of calm had slipped back into place, and that Liam's eyes were now filled with a serious determination. "We are not going to lose him, Louis. Zayn is a fighter. He will make it. He will be fine before we know it."
Louis nodded his head once as he took Liam by the arm and walked out of the waiting room. Louis's heart clenched once again as he glanced back quickly to the blonde crying quietly on Harry. As he got far away, Louis slid down the wall, pulling his knees to his chest. "I do not know how to be strong anymore. What if he honestly does not make it. There was a lot of blood there, Li. It will break Niall if Zayn does not make it. It will break all of us, really, but Niall. I am worried about him. He has not said a word since we found Zayn."
Liam crouched down so that he was at eye-level with Louis. "Zayn is going to be fine, Lou. I promise. You need to be strong for him, me and the other two. You can do it, Louis. I believe you can. I am also worried about Niall, but we need to let him know that we are here for him also." Liam tried to put as much encouragement into his words as possible.
"It's all my fault. It's all my fault." Louis chanted over and over. Tears streaming down his face.
"Louis. Lou, listen to me." Liam said calmly. "I want you to take a deep breathe and concentrate on my voice for a minute, can you do that?"
Louis swallowed and took a deep breathe, his heart hammering in his chest. He knew he wad going to end up hyperventilating if he carried on like this. He needed to calm down and focus. "Okay. I'm alright." he said.
"Louis. It is going to be fine. It is in no way your fault. You were just having fun with him during the signing. You know how he gets during those. You were just trying to help him. He said right afterwards that he forgave you. He was fine then. It's a pity that we did not see the hate he was getting. I do not know how we missed it, but the most important part is, is that we got him here alive. The doctors and nurses are taking care of him. Come on, let's get some tea for the other two." He held his hand out for Louis to take and then pushed him towards the little cafe area.
Harry was pacing the waiting room nervously. They have not heard anything yet. None of the nurses could get any information from the surgeons on how Zayn was doing. It was nerve-wracking to say the least.
"I hate waiting around like this!" Harry exclaimed grumpily, dropping himself down in a chair.
"I know, Haz. we all do." said Niall softly. "But at least we know he is in good hands, and they will not allow anything to go wrong."
Harry nodded his head in agreement. "Yea. Guess you are right."
"I am always right." Harry rolled his eyes at the blonde, with a small smile. It was nice to hear the blonde's voice. Niall had been way too quiet for the Lads' liking. It scared all three of them. They never saw Niall this quiet and sad. They never want to anymore.
The door suddenly opened, and Louis and Liam came back into the room. "The nurse could not get any information." Louis sighed, sitting down on the couch with Liam. " She told us that the surgeon would not tell her anything. All they said was patient was in surgery."
"No kidding." Harry said sarcastically.
"I want another tea." Louis grumbled, putting his hands to his temples an rubbing them. Liam shook his head firmly.
"No, Louis. You've had two, and that's quite enough. You know what happens when you drink to much, when you are stressed. You will wear a hole in the floor with all your pacing."
"But" Louis began.
"No!" Liam repeated firmly. "You're stressed enough as it is. Add hyperactive pacing into the mix, and you'll end up being sedated by one of the nurses."
Harry smiled to himself as he listened to his older boyfriends bickering amongst themselves.
Before, Harry could ask one thing, but was stopped by the doors opening and there was a surgeon coming into the room. Everyone was on their feet.
"Doc, How is he?" Liam demanded worriedly. The Surgeon raised his hands in a calming gesture.
"Zayn is going to be just fine." The four boyfriends let out a collective sigh of relief.
"Zayn's surgery was a success." The doctor continued. "We had to transfer some blood back into him, since he lost a lot. We had to go in and do stitches in every cut that he had. There were some quite deep ones, but everything is perfectly fine. We gave him some medicine for pain, and will want to keep a watch on him for the next couple of days, so we know that this pain medicine will work. He should be waking up soon, if you four want to follow me and I can show you his room." Nodding their thanks, the four Lads followed him.
"I ought to warn you four, though" said the Doctor. "We have Zayn hooked up to quite a few machines in there to monitor everything. But he'll be alright, and there is nothing to worry about. Okay, you lads ready?"
The Lads nodded, feeling their hearts begin to thud in their chest again. They just wanted to hold their boyfriend and never let him go.
The doctor opened the door. The Lads took a deep breath, suddenly feeling a little light-headed, and stepping into the room.
Louis moved into the room ahead of his younger boyfriends, he managed to get a good look at Zayn. He was pale and unmoving, his eyes closed and his nose and mouth obscured by the oxygen mask. Wires traveled down from the monitors and machines above the bed, connecting to the skin in many different places on the lad's chest and arms. Zayn's IV line was in his arm which was covered in bandages where the cuts were. Well, both arms were wrapped up.
Louis rushed forward to the unconscious form, sitting on the edge of the bed and taking Zayn's small limp hand in his own. With his other hand, he ran the bad of his fingers on Zayn's ears.
"Hey, Zee." he whispered softly. "It's alright. We are all here. We are waiting for you to wake up, Love. Please show those beautiful brown eyes. We miss them."
Louis watched as his awake boyfriends pulled up chairs and sat around the bed, regarding Zayn silently and occasionally reaching out to gently caress an arm or a leg. The tension Louis had felt radiating from each of his boyfriends had dissipated almost entirely, with the exception of Niall. And this worried Louis slightly. Niall was always the last person to give in to stress, and the first person to return to his old self after a troubling event. He had always been this way. Always the first to apologize, to forgive, always the first one to start laughing. But now? Now he seemed withdrawn from the rest of the group, wrapped up in his own little world of pain. It just was not right.
"You okay, Love?" Liam asked Niall gently. Niall did not bother to look up, he merely kept his eyes hidden by his hands and exhaled forcefully.
"Ni?" Liam pressed, giving him a gentle squeeze. "C'mon, Love. Speak to me. Please? I am worried about you. We all are worried about you."
Niall took a deep breath, composing himself and plastering a fake smile onto his face. Raising his head from his hands, he rested it on Liam's shoulder. "I'm okay, Li" he murmured. "I'm just- just worried about Zayn, I guess."
Liam's face softened, and he held Niall closer to him. " I know, Ni." he said gently. "So am I. But- are you sure that there's nothing else bothering you? I have not see you this stressed in a long time."
Niall closed his eyes against the wave of pain that washed over him. He felt an arm coming his front to grasp his other shoulder, pulling him around to face Liam. His older boyfriend's expression was one of worry and concern, and Niall realized that he had not answered Liam's question yet.
" Niall, you are not alright." Liam stated worriedly, his eyes studying Niall's pale and drawn face in concern. "Please. Please tell me what is wrong."
Niall felt tears spring into his eyes., and tried to hurriedly brush them away. He was not going to cry in front of Liam. He had to be strong.
"It's nothing, Liam. Just been a long day. Just tired." he croaked softly.
"Niall, do not shut me out like this." Liam begged desperately. "I can not help you if you do not want to be helped."
"Who says I want your help?!" Niall shot back angrily, then clamped his mouth shut. He felt guilt rising up inside of him at the look of hurt that passed across Liam's face.
"Alright then." Liam said softly. "But if you want to talk, I'm here. We are here."
"Li wait, please?" Niall aced, his tear-filled eyes staring up guiltily at the older one. "I'm sorry, I did not mean it. Please do not go."
Liam frowned in concern, dropping back down onto the couch, pulling Niall into a hug, ignoring the worried glances that Louis and Harry were giving them.
Niall buried his face into Liam's shirt and clung to him tightly, feeling safe and secure in the gently embrace.
"It's alright, Ni." Liam soothed. "You can let go. You need to get it out of your system."
Niall clung tighter to the broad shoulders. He knew he needed to cry. Hell, he wanted to cry. But the tears would not fall. He had no right to be comforted by Liam when Zayn lay unconscious in a hospital bed.
Liam held him for several minutes, and Niall's eyes became heavier and heavier with fatigue. "Niall?" Liam said gently, breaking the comfortable silence. "You still awake?"
Niall grunted softly as he fell asleep in Liam's comfortable arms.
As soon as Niall had falling asleep, the Lads heard a voice they thought they would never hear again.
"What happened?"
"Zayn? How are you feeling?" Liam asked as he laid Niall down fully and covered him with a blanket.
"Sore, and horrible to be honest."
"Well, I would believe."
"Why did you save me? Everyone wanted me dead." Zayn mumbled as he did not look at any of his boyfriends.
"We did not want you to die. We love you Z. We want you to live. We need you. You are the one who keeps us together. You keep us from losing our minds. We love you! We saved you, because you first saved us." After Liam's speech there was no dry eye in the room. Even Niall was awake.
"I just thought that you four hated me like everyone else did."
"Oh no, Love. There is nothing you can do that will make us hate you. We love you to the moon and back." Louis said.
"What about the Sun and back?" Niall asked as a small smile appear on his face.
Everyone in the room chuckled. " Yes to the Sun and back."
As the day went on and on. Doctors had came in and told the Lads that everything was looking up and that Zayn could leave soon, if everything was well during the night. Which is did. The Lads had made Zayn feel so loved and wanted that anyone's heart could burst with happiness.
As the Lads were walking out, Zayn turned to them and asked, "What is everyone going to say when they see my ears and all."
"Zayn. Do not worry about what other people say about you. You are perfect. You are Beautiful. We love you that way you are, and that is all that matters." Harry told him.
"Yes it does." Zayn commented as he threw away his beanie. "I will not be needed this."
All his boyfriends had a huge smile on their faces as they walked to the car.
Before Zayn jumped in, he turned around to his boyfriends. "I love you four. Thank you for not leaving me. For not letting me be alone. Thank you."
"We love you too. And no. You are never alone!"