Today I have been sleeping until my body said he had enough, without bothering to even check whether I may be late for the classes. Why, you may ask? Because today is Saturday, the best day of the week. The day where you do not have any obligation and you can do whatever you want. Without those annoying classmates that would not stop talking. Without those pesky teachers over you. And the best thing of all? You still have Sunday as the following day off.
Today, It is my intent to stay lying on my bed, scrolling and browsing random dumb videos people post on the internet.
Or that was the idea I had in mind, as I am heading to the training facilities right now. The good part is that I am in black sport suit with gold straps, which is super comfortable. If only I did not have to carry a sport bag. It is already past 15:00pm, so the Sun is shining on us with the hottest daylight. I yawn out of boredom. There are few people hanging out in the campus. Most of them may still be eating their lunch, so the campus is not very crowded.
"You know, you could have just said no." Shain is walking beside me.
"Do you really think that guy will accept no as a response?"
"Yeah, he will not." he bursts out a laugh, "This man is awesome!"
"Yeah, so awesome." I groan out of disgust, "I still wonder how he got my number."
Shain puts his hand on his chin, then he realizes and grins at me, "Guess who!"
I leave a sigh. That fucking fat ass bitch elf. Why is she always involved in everything? Is she a sexy secret agent?
After walking for a while, we can finally see the building. I also spotted someone waiting in front of the entrance, sheltering from the daylight. And that someone is Caesar with his earphones plugged on his ears. He is wearing a deep blue sport suit and carrying a black sport bag around his shoulder. He realizes my arrival when I get close enough to him and unplug his ears.
"Hello." he salutes at me.
"Hi."
"How are you feeling?"
"Well, I'm alive." I shrug and head to the entrance, "Let's enter."
"Wait, someone is joining us."
I stop right on my track and face him, clicking my tongue, "Huh? For real?"
"Do not worry, I can shield other people besides me."
It seems that my worries and thoughts were very evident, as he said that out of nowhere. Well, if he can manage to protect other people, then I guess there will be no problem.
And so, the three of us end up waiting near the entrance, shielding us from the daylight. We are not exchanging words between us. Well, not that I am giving the chance, as I took out my phone as soon as I started waiting. I can feel him glancing at me from time to time. I also feel an urge deep inside my chest, something that wants to resurface and see the light. Why am I fighting against this urge?
Finally, I can see someone approaching us. Wait, is he not the waffle guy? The brown haired guy stops in front of us and waves his hand.
"Yo! I've come!" he grins at us.
"You are late." Caesar leaves a sigh and greets him with a fist bump.
The waffle guy does the same, "Ya, sorr' pal! Wasn' payin' attention to da clock!"
He then shifts his glance onto me and greets me with a fist bump. "Yo! Lorraine, righ? I'm Heron! Nice t'meet ya!"
"Yeah... Likewise..." I also greet him with a fist bump. Well, a poor attempt of fist bump.
"And I am Shain! Nice t'meet ya!" he had to comment. And what is with that accent?
Now that I have a closer look at him, he is a rather skinny tall white guy. His entangled curly brown hair grants him a messy look and his pointy ears surfaces between those tangles of hairs. Well, his white and blue sport suit is also messy. His bag is also messy. In fact, everything about him is messy.
"I asked Heron to help you practice with your magic." Caesar puts his hand on top of Heron's shoulder, "He is a hemomancer."
Heron smiles at me, very proud of his status. And something catches my attention, something blue. It is his collar. I instantly frown my eyebrows, confused with what I am seeing. This makes no sense.
"Why are you not wearing a green collar, then?"
"He is an especial hemomancer." Caesar points at him with his head.
Heron nods happily, "Yup! I can control other people's blo'd besides' mine!"
Okay, now it makes total sense. What a truly dangerous and terrific power this guy possesses. If he wanted to, we would be dancing at his mercy. Even Caesar would not be able to stop the control as there is no tangible attack to deflect with.
"I see. Anyways, let's enter." I suggest them.
The crystal door slides open as it detects our presence. As always, the main hall is not very crowded. Heron and I wait at the entrance to the training rooms as Caesar again manages the bureaucracy in the reception.
"What's ya power, by da way?" Heron asks me, "Ev'rything happened so quic' yesterday."
"She is a metallomancer." Caesar answered for me from the reception, "Well, kind of."
"A Metalo... Cool, pal!" he really loves to smile.
Does he really know what a metallomancer means? Do not get me wrong, but this guy does not seem very gifted in intelligence. After all, there is another one that is still willing to help me after what happened. I am not looking at Caesar or anything like that.
Caesar returns to us after finishing the procedure and hands to each of us a barrier medallion, which we take them and put on our chest. Then, we cross the door that leads to the training rooms. As always, the place is filled with students practicing with their magic. Do they not get exhausted with that much training? I would, definitely. I wonder if Agata is also training here. Well, not that I really care, actually.
After a while, we reached our designated and private room, courtesy of Aelard. We leave our bags on top of the bench and near the entrance except Heron, and we prepare ourselves on the field.
"Lorra, can ya show me'gain ya magic?" asks me Heron while dropping his bag near his feet.
Lorra? What is with this sudden approach? Revolting. Who the hell allowed you to call me that? Disgusting. Are you even my friend? Gross, gross, gross. Please, die.
"Yeah, no problem."
I wave my hands in motion to create the half blade. And I point it towards Heron. Hm? Heron is casually looking at me. Is he not afraid in the slightest? Do not put yourself so high. I thrust my arm forwards and the blade for once obeys my command, passing a few meters from Heron. I am very proud of myself.
"Be more careful." scolds me Caesar.
Heron has been following the blade's trajectory with his gaze, and now he looks back at me smiling.
"One mor' time, please."
I keep creating more blades and try to shoot with them at the hologram dummies. As always, the blades act as if they had their own consciousn. One after another, the new guy asks one more time again and again. Cut the fucking crap already. How many times do I have to demonstrate for you? What are your eyes for?
"Ya really suc' at dis." he looks at me after analyzing the last blade shot.
"I'll kill you." I glare intensely at him.
"How'd ya do it?" he suddenly changes the toppic, as if nothing happened.
"Huh? What do you mean?" I am confused, and I also feel a little bit tired already.
"I mean, how'd ya use ya mana to create and sho't dem?"
I blink thrice, "I have no clue. Never thought about it."
Heron laughs wildly. Hey, are you picking a fight? What is so funny? I will kill you... Probably.
"There 'r many methods, but I prefer dis one." He unzips his sport bag and takes out a filled blood bag.
"I think where's da objec' I wanna control. Then I flow mana onto dat."
Heron opens the blood bag. Motioning with his hand, the liquid magically flows upwards, leaving the container and hovering near him.
"Y' can command it with ya mind. But usin' ya hands gives ya better ref'rences." The blood moves wherever the hand guides it, whirling and spinning around, and many more. "Such as... Dis. "
He thrust his hand forwards, pointing at me specifically, and the blood follows his order. In a matter of seconds, the blood stops mere centimeters from my face as a liquid form of a lance. That was so fast that I backed off a bit. A cold sweat sprouts from my forehead and falls down up to my chin.
Following his hand's circle motion, the blood spins around me as if enveloping me, and then it finally returns to hovering on top of Heron's hand.
"Jus' like dis!" he smiles in satisfaction.
"Yeah, just like this. Easy." I mock him.
"Yes, just like this. That is, if she starts with a tangible object in the beginning."
The three of us turn toward that familiar voice. Jorik is there leaning against the glass wall with his arm crossed and a smile, overseeing the training. Somehow he has entered the room without us even noticing it.
"In your case, Lorraine, you have to start with a clear image of the concept you want to conjure." he points with his finger at his forehead, "Then, you imagine and feel where it is. Once you grasp it, you can command it to move wherever you want."
I keep staring at him, dumbfounded. Was he not a non-magic person? How can he be so certain about how to use magic? Well, he is a teacher, so I guess it is natural for him to know the theory.
"I see, that makes sense..." Caesar murmurs to himself, touching his chin with his hand.
"Why are you here in the first place?" I question Jorik.
"I cannot be there? Is that what you mean?"
Yes, that is what I mean, so get the fuck out of here.
"Besides, it is the teacher's duty to oversee his student's growth." answers me Jorik, "Now, try it, Lorraine. Close your eyes, channel your mana and imagine your blade."
I frown at him for a few seconds. I am not convinced with his answer nor do I really want to use his advice. What if that happens again? There are two more people now. Can Caesar really protect them?
"Don't worry, Lorraine. I believe in you." Jorik smiles at me.
I inhale and exhale deeply. I guess I will do as he say, but only this time. Just as he said, I close my eyes and channel my mana. Wait, how do you even channel that? Well, whatever. I do not think it will matter anyways. Imagine your blade. Imagine its form. Imagine his structure. Imagine the edge. Imagine...
The edge stained with blood? Corpses and blood? No, do not think of that! The massacre? Lorraine, stop now! Daddy? Agata? I cannot do it... Help!
"Lorraine!"
I return to my senses, with my eyes wide open and exhaling heavily. I get a glimpse of a reflecting light. Golden blades are flying everywhere, crashing against the walls' barriers and Caesar's ones, with Heron and Jorik behind him. Each impact makes the barriers waver on the hitted spot. Seeing this scenario, my heart shrinks and I attempt to control the blades. However, they do not obey my commands. This is so bad.
Blood projectiles fly around us and crash against the blades, creating blood fireworks all around. A short while after, the last of them falls motionless on the ground and vanishes into thin golden dust. I drop myself onto the floor, sweaty and frightened.
"Crisis avoided." comments Caesar.
I hear someone approaching me as I try to regain my breath. I do not want to look at them.
"Ya alright, Lorra? Didn' get hurt?"
"I can't do it..." I murmured to myself.
"What did ya said?"
"I can't do it."
No matter how I do it, those images somehow always manage to start haunting me again and I get overwhelmed. And if that alone was not problematic, I cannot even control how they act when I am in control of the situation. As much as I hate to admit it, it is a matter of time before another catastrophe happens.
"Well, that is why we are here. So you can do it." says Caesar.
"You don't get it. Sometimes, when I close my eyes I just... It fails somehow... I can't."
"I will protect us, so do not worry and take your time to master your magic." he squats and places his hand on my arm, "I am truly conscious of what I am getting myself into. And I do not mind."
"Neither do I." Heron smiles at me and extends his hand to me.
I look hesitant at the hand. Even after what they have said, there is no guarantee they will get out unscathed. Nor am I willing to injure them.
"If you are still worried, imagine your blades quick and with your eyes open." suggests Jorik, "I am sure this way you will not be overwhelmed."
I look at them for a while, and then leave a sigh, "Alright. I'll continue."
I grab the hand and Heron pulls me up. I still do not feel very sure nor good about it, but we will see where this leads us to. Who knows, maybe it turns out to be better.
After I have calmed down a little bit more, we resume the training.
During this session, I have been applying all the advice they have given to me earlier. Surprisingly, the advice have proven to be quite helpful, more than Caesar's. However, I still need a lot more practice. Imagining quickly the blades, making them consistent and then trying to shoot them with all your might is way harder than you would have thought. And many times I have only created a partial blade, or none. Maybe I am not channeling the mana properly. On the bright side, it seems that today I managed to control the blades a little bit better.
As expected, after an hour or so, my body feels exhausted and we call it a day. As I turn around to pick my sport bag, something takes me by surprise. Why the fuck is Jorik still here sitting on the bench?
"Nice training." he hands me a towel.
I begrudgingly take it and start removing my sweat from my entire body. Caesar and Heron also grab the towels Jorik hands them.
"What do you want?" I go straight to the point.
"I wanted to tell you this after your training." Jorik clears his throat and glares at me, "Lorraine, the council has decided to add the red strap on your collar. The new collar will be delivered to you once it is finished."
I just felt for a moment how the world went upside down. I blink twice. Yes, this is the reality.
"I see." I expected this outcome, to be honest.
"After looking at the recordings and matching with the readings of your collar, they deemed you perilous and unpredictable for the welfare of the campus."
I lower my gaze, "And what about that bastard?"
I have a feeling that I know what will be the answer, but I want to ask nonetheless.
"None of them will be punished. The council condemned you as the sole culprit of the incident. You attempted against them with your magic first, and that makes you the offender."
"Of course." I chuckle sarcastically, "Unlike them, I have no connections. I am worthless, after all."
Jorik looks displeased with my answer, "That is not tru-"
"Save your excuses. I'm sick of them."
And that is it. I can no longer use the training facilities. I cannot participate in magic classes. My delivery requests will be denied, not that they accepted many of them from the beginning. A curfew will be put on me. This. Is. Awesome. I feel very tired.
"I'm sorr' to hear dat, pal." Heron puts his hand on my shoulder.
"I expected this." I grab my sport bag and return the medallion to Caesar, "I'm going home, then. Thanks for everything."
"Wait, Lorraine." calls me Caesar.
I stop at the door and look at him.
"If there is anything you need, feel free to ask us."
"Sure." I smile at him and exit the room.
I do not feel like changing here, so I skip the locker room and leave the training facility. After exiting, the daylight blinds me for a second before my eyes get accustomed to it. So annoying. While I walk slowly towards the apartment, I can hear the annoying talks and laughter of the nearby students. So annoying. I just want to be quiet. During the walk, I cannot help but keep rewinding Jorik's statement over and over again. Not that it really affects me, honestly.
After arriving at the student apartment, I enter without looking at anyone and head quickly to my room, taking great steps on the staircase. Once I am at my door sprayed with egg yolks, I quickly scan my ID card and it slides open. Finally at home. I drop my sport bag while I walk towards my bed and fall on top of it, without caring about my sweat. I exhale deeply, as if trying to remove all my negative energy accumulated on the body. I stare blankly at the white wall. I feel so tired. Jorik's words resonate again inside my mind. Suddenly, I feel a gentle stroke on my head.
"Wanna talk about it?" Shain's voice is so gentle.
"I'm fine." I hide my face on the blanket.
"What a bunch of bastards are all of them."
I nod, "Yes, they are."
"I am here for you, you don't need them."
I do another nod. We stay silent for a while as he keep stroking me, and I close my eyes. My body feels so light right now and my breathing relaxes.
"It is fine to vent."
Suddenly, I have an urge to sniff myself. Blergh. I stink so much, that is unforgivable. I wake up, despite feeling numb and having to abandon the relaxing petting.
"I'm going to shower."
I head to the bathroom, leaving Shain behind me. The door slides open upon detecting my presence and I lock it through the screen once I have entered. I think I will take a bath this time. I approach the bathtub and open the faucet. As the warm water starts filling the bathtub, Jorik's words strike me again.
"The council has decided to add the red strap on your collar."
"They deemed you perilous and unpredictable."
Do not mind them. You are used to it, anyways. It has always been like this. What is different this time?
"None of them will be punished."
"You attempted against them with your magic. That makes you the offender."
But this was very one sided. I was not the only one doing the bad things. Well, not that they really care.
"You are the sole culprit of the incident."
Strange, my vision starts to get blurry. Hm? Droplets are falling on the bathtub? Wait, are those tears? My eyes are watery. Am I crying? This does not make sense, I am not sad at all.
I fall onto my knees as I gasp in an attempt to hide my crying. But the tears won't stop flowing out. In fact, the more I fight against it, the worse it becomes. I bent forwards as I grasp my chest with my hand and feel how my heart shrinks into nothingness. Still not willing to accept the truth, I try to mutter my sobbing. This is so painful.
Surprised, I feel Shain hugging behind me, with his cheek caressing my head. This sudden warmth is the straw that broke the camel's back. My soundless sob becomes an unleashed cry, and I turn around to hug him, hiding my face on his chest. My fingers claw deeply into his back. I feel how he embraces me with both his arms and strokes my head.
"That's unfair... That's unfair. That's unfair. THAT'S UNFAIR!" my voice is being muttered against his chest.
"Yes, it is unfair."
"Why am I the only one punished? WHY!?" my sobbing increases, " I didn't do anything! They started first! And they even called me a lot of things!"
Shain keeps patting and kisses my head.
"I'm not a slut. I' m not a witch. I'm not a HARBINGER!" I sniffle.
"You are none of that."
"That ruler hurted a lot! And nobody cared about that!"
"Unforgivable."
I inhale before continuing, "Why does everybody hate me so much? Why? I haven't done anything to them! Just WHY!?"
"That is not true. I don't hate you, I love you."
"You're not even real..." I mutter to myself.
I exhale deeply between sobs. I feel so tired. I barely can open my eyes.
"Why do I have to go through all of this...? Just... why...?"
The crying becomes less virulent.
"I want to die..." my voice weakens.
"Don't." I feel him tightening the hug. "Don't ever think about that."
"I want to sleep forever... I really want to..." I can barely feel any force left in my body. "I'm very tired..."
"Then rest, but remember to wake up..." he gently caresses my cheek.
"I'm sorry..."
I let my head rest on his chest. My eyes itch. My throat feels thirsty. A final tear runs through my cheek. Slumber is slowly but steadily crawling through my mind. Everything starts to feel numb, to feel fading. The sounds and noises feel distant. Until I feel nothing more but darkness. And I fall into the depth of the slumber.