Luke sighed, frustrated as hell. All he wanted was not being stared at whenever he walked into the school. He didn't want the attention, he didn't like that everybody thought they knew everything about him and he didn't like the person he became in this school.
He wasn't himself when he was around his friends, well except Calum and Michael. They were the only ones who knew the real him. Britney didn't even know him, all she cared about was that she was dating the most popular guy in school..
He had been fighting a lot with Britney lately and everybody seemed to talk about it. He didn't even know what was so important about him and Britney. Sometimes he envied people that could be themselves, like Rosa. He had noticed her many times and to be honest he found her interesting.
He had his earphones plugged in and ignored every stare and everyone who talked about him and how cool it was of him to get drunk at the party last weekend. What Luke did wasn't cool. Getting drunk every weekend to forget about his problems wasn't cool and he didn't like that people thought that, but for some weird reason, he couldn't stop himself from letting them think so. For some weird reason he found it important that people thought he was cool, he cared what people thought about him and he couldn't do anything about it.
When Luke came to his locker, Britney stood there, arms crossed and a frown on her face. Luke wanted to sigh, but he knew it didn't make his problems go away, so he remained silent as Britney started yelling at him for not calling her last night.
Last night had been rough for Luke, his mother came home drunk again and Luke had to take care of her. She hadn't been the same since the divorce with Luke's father. He had cheated on his mother and Luke's mother took it pretty bad. It was hard for both of them and Luke didn't like seeing his mother like that, but he didn't know what to do.
He heard some giggles and he turned his head to the side only to see Rosa and her friend or something laugh with each other. As Britney continued to yell at him, he focused on Rosa.
Her blonde hair was in a ponytail and she wore black skinny jeans and an Arctic Monkeys hoodie. She looked kind of tired today with bags under her eyes and not too much make up on her face. Luke still thought she looked cute.
Her green eyes noticed Luke and started staring at him again and he had to look away quickly. He knew she had caught him staring at her before and it was kind of awkward, but Luke thought she was beautiful with her blonde hair, green eyes and those dimples whenever she laughed. She had a cute laughter too. Luke knew he shouldn't think that about her, but he couldn't help it.
"Luke! Are you even listening?" Britney snapped Luke out of his thoughts.
"Huh?" Luke asked, tilting his head and looking into Britney's angry, brown eyes.
"I can't believe you. You know what? We'll talk later." she yelled and shoved Luke away before walking herself to her class.
Luke leaned his head against his locker and let out a groan, hoping all his problems could just disappear, but he wasn't that lucky.
Luke rushed to math, he was a bit late again and he knew how his teacher always got angry at him. When he came into the room, the teacher said stuff about him being late again, but he didn't listen as he just rushed to the table right beside Rosa. Rosa ignored him, like she always did and Luke had a staring contest with the white wall.
Rosa was a mystery to Luke. He didn't know much about her, but he knew she didn't talk to many people except for Ashton. He also knew she was good at every subject in school and that she loved music. She probably just owned band t-shirts. That was all the shirts Luke ever saw her wear.
After math, history and english, he walked to lunch where Michael and Calum sat.
"Are you okay?" Calum asked, a bit worried for Luke.
Luke just shrugged, staring down at his food.
"I guess so. I'm tired though." Luke mumbled slowly.
"Yeah I understand. All the fights with Britney must be tiring." Michael agreed, making Luke sigh quietly.
They didn't understand, that, that wasn't the problem. No one understood Luke. Luke's arguing with Britney was the least of his problems.
"Yeah," Luke muttered.
*
After school, Luke walked to the library down town. He just couldn't stand being home or with any of his friends right now. He knew his mother was hungover and probably moody and he knew that he couldn't talk to his friends about it, so the library seemed as the best soloution for Luke.
He found to kill a mockingbird and began reading it. It was his favorite book. No one really knew that Luke liked reading and listening to music that wasn't the music his classmates liked. He quite liked that not everybody knew that. He liked that he could be himself alone and he liked that not everybody knew everything about him.
Suddenly the door to the empty library opened and Luke's head shot up. There weren't often pepole in the library. His eyes widened as he stared right into some crystal green ones. Her eyes were confused as well and Luke looked away quickly.
She wasn't alone though, she was with her brother, or Luke assumed it was her brother. He was just standing there, looking at the floor.
"Max, just sit down. I'll find a book we can read." Rosa said to her brother and walked over to a bookshelf for children.
Luke couldn't keep his eyes away from her as she scanned the bookshelves. He noticed that she bit her bottom lip when she was focused and he also noticed that she narrowed her eyes a bit.
Luke's phone started ringing and everything happened quickly as Rosa's little brother started running out of the library. Rosa looked suprised and ran after him and Luke sat there confused to what just happened.
He got some ugly looks from the librarian and he stood up to walk out of the library so he could talk to the one calling him. When he saw it was his mother, he groaned, knowing she probably wanted him to come home and make dinner or clean the house or just be a shoulder to cry on.
Luke knew he shouldn't groan about that, but it wasn't that easy. It got tiring because he didn't have a mother anymore, he had to be the one to help his mother so it didn't feel like it should feel.
Luke loved his mother, but always "babysitting" her made him a bit sad, because sometimes he was the one that needed help, but he couldn't get that help or advice because his mother was helpless.
"Hello?" Luke asked as he pressed the green button on his phone.
"Luke? Where are you?" his mother asked.
"I'm doing homework at the library." he answered.
"Luke.. Can you come home? I could really need some dinner." she begged and Luke sighed.
"Yeah.. Fine.". And with that, the converstation was over.
Luke forgot his jacket inside of the library and when he got inside again, Rosa was sitting beside her brother, both having a frown on their face.
"Max, please. I know you can read." she begged, but Max shook his head and tears streamed down his face.
"I don't want to read." he mumbled.
Rosa didn't say anything else after that, but she looked up and locked eyes with Luke for a split second.
When Luke came home, he made dinner to his mother and then listened to her complain about her life and her questions about why Luke's father had to cheat on her. Luke had to tell her, just like he did everyday, that he was just a jerk and that there wasn't anything wrong with his mother, but his mother didn't listen to that. She never did.
They ended up sitting up until 3 AM and Luke didn't want to go to school at all. At school he just got into more arguements with Britney and he just felt like he would explode soon. He felt like if his life was going to continue like this, he would explode on Britney, on his stupid fake friends and he was afraid that he would blow up on his mother too. He just felt so angry and so tired. All he wanted was to go back to bed and sleep all his problems away, why did he have to be like this? Why couldn't he have a normal life?