58 | Au revoir, asshole!
I hate Rafael Grayson.
That's the first thing I was going to scream every morning until it turned into reality.
New day, new beginnings. I was going to listen to Harri boy and be my awesome self. Wearing one of my favorite summer dresses, I looked at the mirror, doing something I hadn't done since a very long time.
I practiced a smile.
There! Perfect!
I could either slip into depression and whirl my mind with dramatic suicide thoughts or cheer up, forget the past and focus on my future. I chose the latter.
I knew it wasn't going to be easy but I had to at least try. There was no way I was going to let Rafael Grayson get me like he did last time.
"Queens don't cry over bitches." I did a hair flip, praised myself and headed down, ready to face their stares like I was some specimen.
My face lit up as I spotted Harri discussing something with Jake as they passed by the foyer. Our eyes met and I used that brief contact to convey my gratitude to him. Poor guy talked to me for more than an hour until I dozed off.
Strolling to the kitchen in desperate need of a strong coffee, my eyes fell over the car outside. So Rafael and his fiancée were heading somewhere to spend some 'alone time'.
And you, dear Vittoria, do not give a fuck about it, do you?
Nope! Not all all!
Good.
I noticed there was a huge gift basket atop the kitchen island. It was filled to the brim with chocolates and decorated with a golden ribbon.
A set of footsteps entering into the kitchen diverted my attention. Charcoal orbs snapped at me, startled to see me normal.
I feel so ashamed with myself about what I did yesterday. No man was worth losing your self respect.
"Morning, Mr Grayson." I smiled widely. "What's with this face? You're going on a romantic trip with your soon to be wife. Cheer up or else she might think you still haven't moved on from your ex."
Damn! This was so thrilling! I could see his ego crumbling and oh boy! That worked like a therapy.
"Where are you off to by the way? Montroc— among the Alps?"
"I hate that place and every single memory of it. Just because you're so curious, I'll tell you where I'm going with my soon to be wife." He spat.
"I'm listening."
"Paris." That sadist smirked, craving to see the pain.
I felt it right there. As I said, hating him wasn't going to be easy. But if fooling myself into it was the only way, then be it. Nonetheless, I didn't let it show. He wasn't the only one to be trained to control your emotions.
"Amazing!" I beamed, began moving out but stopped and turned back dramatically, closing the distance and pulling him down to whisper into his ears with my husky voice. "Be careful, mon chéri. Don't accidentally slip your whore's name while you fuck your soon to be wife. Au revoir, asshole!"
Something changed in him.
"Wait, please." I felt a soft tug over my wrist.
Suddenly all my determination vanished. This time it wasn't the addiction of his touch. It was the disgust. Dread twisted in my stomach and the urge to throw up became prominent. My breaths came out as short gasps and I struggled for air.
"Vittoria! Oh my god!" He whispered, terrified.
"Don't touch me." I shoved him away, scampering back to the farthest corner and it was only then did I find myself capable of breathing normally again. "Don't you under any circumstances ever touch me. I'm being hell serious."
"Vittoria please listen to me." He almost panicked. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it."
"Oh please, Mr Grayson. Don't stain your pride by apologizing to a whore."
"Stop it goddammit! Stop saying that!" He yelled in frustration.
He can go shove his guilty conscience up his ass. This must be a pretence for all I know.
"I don't need your apology. Just leave, run away before you fall in love with me again."
"I'm not running away." He said defensively. "This has got nothing to do with you."
The sound of our argument must've reached Mason. He entered the kitchen, his hard gaze boring holes through Rafael. He returned his glare and stormed out without saying a word.
"Isn't he a complete cartoon?" Mason scoffed, eyeing Rafael's retracing form rather amusingly.
My reply to his comment was sheer nonchalance. I was more interested in knowing the reason behind Mason's behavior.
"Mase?" I narrowed my eyes. "Why are you acting so normal? By now you should be treating me like a trauma victim."
I wasn't complaining. They did that because they cared about me. But sometimes it got a little too much.
"Um..actually," He scratched his head. "Toby has given us strict orders to treat you normally and not like a specimen...although I told him you were one." He stick his tongue out.
"Mase!" I whined. "You're so mean."
And my Tobo was a rockstar!
Mason's eyes peeked over my shoulder, outside the window. I resisted the urge to turn back and cast one last look at Rafael before he left. Don't know how long he'd be gone.
Your mantra, Vittoria!
Yes. I hate Rafael Grayson.
"They're gone. You can relax now." Mason said, a light despondency lacing his words.
I shook my head as if doing so will shake away the thoughts and instead focused my attention on the basket of chocolates.
"Whom is it for? Can I take one?"
Mason swatted my hand away. "Keep that down. Keep it. Keep it."
"Jeez! Fine! Who is it for anyway?"
His lips stretched up into a goofy grin. "I'm meeting someone special tonight."
"You what! Who! When? Where? What happened to Suzanne? Why don't you ever tell me anything? You didn't even-"
"Shh." He scolded, clamping his hand over my mouth. "Stop giving me a headache, kiddo!"
"Then tell me. Who are you meeting?" I said despite the barrier of his hand.
"Junior Outhwaite." He grinned.
•••••••
Minutes turned into hours which tumbled ahead into days. Six days to be precise. It wasn't working.
Rafael's absence was taking a toll on me.
Yes, that's how fragile my resolve was. I can fool myself all that I like but there was no way I could deny the dark, amiable truth.
I love Rafael Grayson.
And I lost him.
I did exactly what Harri did. I took his love for granted and I fucking lost him. Rafael was right. He did all that he could but it wasn't enough for me. As I let off some steam and thought about what happened that day, I realized that I overreacted.
Rafael would never disrespect me like that. He was angry. People blabber shit they don't mean.
He was right, like every time and I was wrong again, like every time.
But the anger still remained. For me as well as him. When he made a mistake, I always forgave him. I always gave him a million chances. Now when I asked for one, he just couldn't.
The chains suspending the red and black punching bag jingled as I landed a kick, following with my continuing punches. I focused on my bloody knuckles, trying to subdue the pain springing from my heart.
Bam!
The leather of the punching bag heated up slightly at the assault of my fists, my skin scrapping at the contact and drawing out more blood.
"Fucking feelings. Fucking heart. Just go to hell!" I gritted, my hits getting more intense and my breaths heavy as I gasped for air.
"Vittoria!" Harri called out, his hasty footsteps echoing in the basement gym. "Stop it, Vittoria! What are you doing." He forcefully pulled me back from the poor punching bag.
"Practising."
"Doesn't look like it." He scolded like he does to his daughter whilst quickly drawing out a first aid kit and wrapping my hands with a bandage. "What did you achieve by hurting yourself? Please enlighten me."
"Don't scold me like that. I'm not Xenia." I mumbled grumpily and sat down resting my back against the wall. He sighed, settling down next to me but maintaining a decent distance. "I'm seeing you after two days straight. You're ignoring me. Go and guard the mansion. That's more important. I'm never going to talk to you."
He grinned. That idiot freaking grinned. "Xenia told me the exact same thing yesterday."
"And?"
"She didn't talk to me for full five minutes. Can you believe it? I for sure can't." He feigned awe.
Don't laugh. You're mad at him, Vittoria.
"No, don't even try, princess Leia. You're going to give in soon. See? It's there. It's almost there. Oh no, what am I seeing? A...smile? Vittoria is smiling? Holy-"
"You don't swear Harri!" I screeched.
He knit his brows. "Cheesecakes. I was going to say cheesecakes."
"Sure." I laughed. He stared at me for a second. Then he smiled.
"That wasn't so difficult now, was it?"
It's never difficult when I had my favorite people around. But everything goes back to the new normal the moment I'm left alone. Why was I was so fucked up?
"He loves you, Vittoria. He's just angry." Harri reassured. "You can't just unlove a person you've loved so much."
"He's marrying Camila! No person does that out of anger."
What must he be doing right now? Kissing her at the top of Eiffel tower? Enjoying the morning coffee with her? Or maybe fucking her like he did to me?
I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling my tears fall over my lap. It was a week of trapping my tears inside me, thinking I was strong enough to not shed a tear for him.
Harri rubbed my back, giving me the time to let it all out. Don't know what was it about his spectral touch. It was like he touched me and all the jumble of my thoughts sorted out. I was dying to know how he did that.
What was I doing? Why was I sitting here crying over it instead of doing something about it. I can't let go of the one thing that meant the world to me just like that.
I tried once and I failed. Okay. Get over it. Rafael tried god knows how many times. I can't just give up because of one failure.
"Harri." I said like a determined soldier. "Let's do it."
"You want to have sex with me right now!" This time he screeched.
"Huh? Sex? What are you say- no, Harri!"
"Phew!" He let out a relived sigh. I raised a brow. "No, I mean I would love having sex with you. I didn't mean it that way...." And then he started talking at a supernatural speed like he does when he's nervous.
"Harri boy!" I chuckled, shaking his shoulders. "You're a single piece, you know that?"
"Really?" He beamed but quickly switched it to an adorable fear as if something clicked. "In a good way right?"
"Of course. God! I can't with you." I was on a full blast laugh mode by now, literally rolling onto the floor clutching my tummy.
"Let's get back to let's do it? Let's do what?" He asked, clueless.
I straighned up back and took a deep breath before announcing the childish plan. "Let's make him jealous."
There was silence for a fleeting second and then, after a very long time, I witnessed Harri's rare evil but playful smirk. "I'm so in."
"Yes!" I pumped my fist in the air and Harri jumped back, escaping the hit.
"Oops!" I smiled sheepishly.
"Bless my reflexes." His hand flew to his chest.
Poor Rafael had been a victim to so many of those.
"Let that arrogant ass come back home. I swear to god he's so gonna regret leaving me alone here for a handsome British guard with dirty blonde hair and insanely gorgeous blusih grey eyes and a sexy tattoo on his perfectly toned chest and who also happened to be my one day boyfriend to snatch me away from him."
"One." He held up a finger, his calm composure not faltering. "Breathe! And two. Um.. Thank you?"
"Most welcome." I flashed him the widest smile before going back to being serious. "Tell me it will work." I chuckled nervously.
"Nope." He replied instantly. And very confidently.
"What? You said this childish tactic always worked." I pouted.
"It's childish only if you do it like a child." He stated. "But if we apply our mind and our acting skills, we can definitely get through it."
"Please be the director of this story. I'll do whatever you say blindly." I threw my hands up in defeat. I better not use my mind. Whenever I do, I only end up fucking things up.
"You trust me so much?"
"Yes, Harri. I do."
A twinkle sparked in his eyes and he turned sideways to face me, crossing his legs. I imitated his actions excitedly.
"Here's how we're going to go about with it." His hands formed a steeple as he began explaining. "We have to make this look real. We need to convince boss that he's lost you. It's the fear that'll do the job for us."
Wow, this was so fascinating. Our approach to this ordeal was that of a country's defence strategies. He was laughing at me when I was making a big deal about winning that dance competition and look at him now.
"But convincing him isn't enough. We have to make him believe it. And for that, we have to make others believe it as well. Boss is no fool. Not to mention he is trained to catch lies. Also, he knows how much you love him. That's actually a disadvantage for us."
"Oh no!" I freaked out.
"Chill! No fear, Harri boy here." He wiggled his brows.
"That name is reserved for me. You can't call yourself that."
"Possessive already?" He smirked.
"You're my boyfriend. Duh!" I rolled my eyes.
"Yet another childish turn." He corrected. "He knows you well, Vittoria. In fact everyone does. One mistake, and they'll know this is all just an act."
"Ugh! Then what do we do?" I pulled my hair in frustration.
"The just good friends scheme." He grinned devilishly. "Trust me that's utterly infuriating."
Correct. Like how we're feeling with Alli and Ollie. This guy is a genius. Amazeballs!
"But that will be only until that breaking point where everyone will be pulling their hair in frustration like you did a few minutes ago. After that, stage two will begin. We'll finally break our denial and start dating. Yay!" He clapped, imitating a high school cheerleader.
No wonder he got an award for best direction. This man knew how to make believable stories. That was an art.
"Your brothers like me. That's a plus point. All you have to do is convince Oliver sir to allow you to date a guard." He said.
Sounds fun.
Shut up and focus, Vittoria. Your life depends on this.
"Just tell him you feel good around me. He'll melt. I know he's a softie on the inside. Just like boss." He smiled.
My heart soared. How could someone be so good. I owe my life to him. I don't how I'll ever repay this debt to him.
"Thanks, Harri." I said, genuinely feeling grateful.
"No problem. I'll get to kiss you. What else do I want." He sassed. "Just don't fall in love with me while pretending. Although I wouldn't mind."
I scoffed, staring at him in plain awe. "Where's my shy Harri boy?"
"I'm just getting in my character. A little warm up, you know."
"Oh yes?"
"Uh huh."
"Come here you." I laughed, throwing my arms around him.
"Woah." He chuckled, slightly falling back at my abrupt action.
"I don't need to lie about feeling happy around you. I feel that way genuinely. You make me feel alright, Harri. And I love you for it." I hugged him tighter. He hesitated for a second before hugging me back. I'd blame that on his decency.
"I've been looking for you everywh-"
Harri and I jumped back, tearing apart from our embrace, my face turning red and Harri momentarily panicked.
"I'm sorry sir." He blurted out, his head bowed down.
Grandpa was here.
He studied us silently, switching his stern gaze between us like a strict school teacher. The tension was thick. This must look so inappropriate.
But hey, that's what we wanted, right.
Dear universe, was that a sign to go ahead with this plan?
"I'm sorry sir. It's not how it looked like."
Oliver still didn't speak a word, letting the mute horror suspend in the air. Then, finally after a long stretch of silence, he spoke. Just a stern and maybe even displeased order.
"Meet me in the study, Harrison." And with that, he marched out without sparing us a glance.
Harri: *chuckles nervously* Vote and comment to save me from the brothers.