56 | Breaking A Soul
I waited for their reactions.
I didn't receive any.
It was like time had stopped. No one moved. They didn't even so much as blink. Everyone went still like they were stone sculptures. But there was one thing in motion—Vittoria's tear, as it rolled down her cheek, leaving a stain behind it.
"Move away." She mumbled, her voice low but strict and her eyes riveted on me. "I said move away, Camila!" She roared, shoving her away violently.
Our hands moved apart and her harsh blow caused Camila to almost trip over an armchair but Toby kept her from falling.
"Excuse me but what do you think are you doing, Vittoria?" I spat, trying my best not to lose my calm.
"You can't do this to me, Rafael." She cried.
All eyes grew wide and jaws dropped at her reaction.
"Vittoria. It's okay, please calm down." Oliver held her, gently rubbing her back. "I hope you've thought this through." He gritted, focusing his angry eyes on me. "Don't you even dare play with my sisters like that."
"Me and Camila happen to be mature individuals. We aren't interested in playing stupid games like her." I nodded at the seemingly hurt victim like she always pretended to be.
"You're doing this just to hurt me." She shook her head.
"Everything isn't about you, Vittoria. Stop giving yourself so much importance." Camila sneered, coming back to my side.
"Do I look like I've asked for your opinion?" She retorted.
"I'm sorry. I own up to all my mistakes. I've broken your heart and I'm sorry. But please don't do this, Rafael. Please." Her words were unclear from crying so much and she struggled to maintain balance. If it wasn't for Oliver holding her, she'd be slumped down by now.
I simply watched her, my cold turned heart not feeling an ounce of pain seeing her like that.
"I love you, Rafael."
"Oh really?" I scoffed. "I don't think so."
"Then who does? This bitch?"
"Vittoria! Careful with your language. She's your sister." Oliver scolded.
"Yes, Vittoria. She loves me. At least I don't have to worry about our relationship status changing every morning."
"That's fucking devotion! Not love!" She yelled.
"But that's better than obsession, no?" I raised a brow.
"I didn't mean it. I was angry and..and scared and I don't even know what. You can't marry someone else just because of one fight."
"Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't you like...have a boyfriend?" I smirked.
"Didn't you like...call yourself a matured individual?" Mason snorted.
Now what the fuck was his problem? Shouldn't he be the happiest? Even more than Camila.
"I-I'll do anything you ask me to, Rafael. Tell me how do I make you forgive me?"
"Stop it, Vittoria! He's not worth losing your self respect." Mason snarled.
"Now if you're done making a fool of yourself, excuse us." Camila cringed as if seeing her face was the most disgusting thing to do and held my hand, guiding us up to my room but I stopped her.
Something had to be done before that.
"You." I held Vittoria's arm. "Come with me." The touch of my skin against her only made me want to retrace my hand as I tugged her to a nearby room, slamming the door shut.
"What are you up to, huh? Stop this madness and for fuck's sake Vittoria, stop making a scene. You want to go and embarrass yourself, go ahead and do it. But I'm not up for it, you get that?"
Her eyes, swollen and terrified looked up at me in mute horror mixed with disbelief. "Do you..do you hate me, Rafael?"
"I think I do." I affirmed, my lack of hesitation in confessing it startling me as well.
My words seemed to have hit her hard. A loud horrified gasp departed from her lips followed by the tormenting struggle to breathe. Her back hit the wall and her hand flew to her chest but her eyes and her blurry vision stayed rooted on me.
She was hurting more than she could handle it. There was a lot of pain. I could clearly see it.
But I couldn't feel it anymore.
It was beyond my imagination. Just a few days ago, I'd have turned the world upside down seeing her in this state. But now..
I simply couldn't care anymore, no matter how much I wanted to.
On the very contrary, I felt happy that she was experiencing all the pain I went through. Maybe that's how she'll understand the reason for this drastic change in me.
"You forgot everything we shared together?"
"I'm surprised you need me to explain myself. Why don't you just give yourself all those reasons you thought were logical when you stayed away from me like I was some curse. It's shouldn't be so difficult for you. Plus it would save a lot of time for us."
"I love you, Rafael." She whispered, shutting her eyes and tipping her head back to rest it against the wall.
"I'm sorry, Vittoria. I don't love you anymore."
"You're lying."
I wasn't sure if I was.
Now when I looked at her, my heart didn't beat faster, the smile forming at her mere mention died away and so did the urge to protect her from every danger and keep her happy.
"I did everything one could do for this love. Name a single thing I might have missed but it wasn't enough for you. I wasn't enough for you." Now that hurt. I strolled to the window, pushing it open to feel less stuffy.
"You think it was easy for me to see Camila hurt like that? No, Vittoria it wasn't. But I was ready to live with the guilt for the rest of my. For us! I did that for us. That's because I loved you. But you? You chose to hurt me just to deal with your guilty conscience. You thought you were a good person to do the right thing but no, you were just selfish."
"You're right." She replied immediately. "It was wrong on my part to solely make decisions for us."
"You kept pushing me away. I thought I'd never get tired of trying but I did. Because I realized my love has no value for you." I shrugged, not knowing how else to put it.
"Give me one last chance, Rafael. Please! I'm begging you. I promise I won't let you down this time. Just one more chance." She managed between those hiccups which made it so difficult for her to speak.
I hated this feeling of not loving Vittoria. It made me feel empty. But that was the sad truth.
I don't think I could ever love again.
"I stepped over my ego. I entertained all your stupidity willingly. Hell, I even broke the Esztar Code for you. And what did I get in return? Nothing but dejection and pain." I closed my eyes, trying not to think about it. "You insulted me. I didn't mind it one bit. But what I couldn't tolerate was the fact that you insulted my love. That's where you fell in my eyes."
"Stop, please." She sobbed, trudging my way until her feeble body fell over me. Her delicate arms wrapped around me, holding me with her shaking hands. "Don't do this to me, Rafael. Please don't punish me like this."
"Move away, Vittoria." I demanded, my hands drawn behind my back balling into a fist.
"No." She shook her head into my chest. "I was waiting for you the whole day. I was going to talk to you and clear out everything. I know you're angry. Hit me if you want. Beat me until you've got all your aggression out but don't do this."
"Last warning, Vittoria. Get the fuck away from me."
"I can't lose you, Rafael. I love you. I need you right now."
"Enough!" Her body fell over the couch by the force with which I tore her stubborn self away from me. "You no longer get the privileges to do whatever the fuck you want. I'm not going to tolerate all your bullshit any longer. So I suggest you know your place and don't you dare overstep your boundaries." I yelled, struggling to keep myself from getting violent.
But at the same time I knew I would never hit her again. Ever.
Throwing a last disgusted look at her, I began moving out. There was nothing left to talk between us.
"No! Stop!" Panicked, she grabbed my hand in an attempt to stop me. "You won't do this, will you? Y-you won't marry her." She quivered.
"I will."
"She doesn't love you, goddammit!" She screamed, slamming her palm over the wall. "That bitch is totally fake. She's not how she pretends to be."
"Oh please, at least she's not a desperate-"
She sucked in a breath. Her tears dried. Her heart died. She clamped her hand over her mouth, staring at me with petrified eyes.
A pang of hurt hit my chest. For the first time today, I felt the pain she felt.
I shouldn't have said that.
"Say it." She blinked rigorously but the action wasn't intented to blink back the tears. It was to keep her eyes open. She was slowly losing consciousness.
"Complete that sentence, Rafael. I challenge you." She gritted, rage switching for the stretched agony.
"I didn't-"
"Say that I'm a whore. Come on. You hate me. Shouldn't be so difficult for you." She hurled my own words at me.
No, I would never say that. There was a reason I couldn't complete that sentence. No matter how angry or hurt I was, I would never disrespect her like that again.
"Just out of curiosity, Rafael." She spat, the fury wrestling to stay within the bounds of her heart. "When did you reach to that glorious conclusion? When I was sucking Camila's fiance's dick in his office? Or when I was cheating on my boyfriend? When exactly did you crown me as a whore?"
I felt the heat of her gaze penetrating me. I felt ashamed of myself. I hated her. But I hated myself more.
Something happened. Her knees, too weak to bear the burden hit the carpeted floor. Her body collapsed down. Those eyes, not being able to stop the tears looked at me in utter helplessness.
"I'm reduced to just a whore." She cried bitterly, each tear falling over the maroon carpet raising my fear.
I was angry before. But now I was scared.
A shiver ran down my spine when I failed to understand what to do next. My feet began carrying me backwards and I soon found myself exiting the room altogether.
I ran away like a coward.
I left her fallen form alone in there.
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