"What makes you like him so much?" asked dad, while he rolls up his sleeves all ready to cook.
"I don't know dad! I just feel a connection with him." Dad's eyes open in surprise.
"Connection? Are you guys in a relationship?" I let out a laugh.
"Dad, I wish."
He lets out a giggle, turning to the refrigerator.
"But, Hana, don't make it difficult for me, okay?"
"What do you mean?" I asked, jerking my eyebrows.
"I cannot bring you Jungkook to marry. He is just too far out of my reach. So, before you order me to marry someone, think about your poor dad!"
"Daaaaaddddd!" I scream, laughing at the same time. He laughs too.
"But dad, you know what?" I asked in a slow, muffled voice.
He suddenly comes near the counter where I sit, leaning in. "What?"
"I am already married to him.." His expressions change to a wonder-face. "In here," I said, pointing at my forehead.
"My bad! My daughter has married already!" he says, very seriously. "I will kill you Jungkook!" he says pointing the knife at his poster lying on the counter that I was decorating.
"NO, DAD!" I yell back, hugging his poster.
The little memory made me laugh; old, good times when Jungkook was only to be seen through screens, and not like every day. I felt much better, lying on my bed, absorbing the warmth of my blanket. Jungkook's lips were still fresh on my lips, his soft touch and a salty taste. It made me blush, undoubtedly.
How far have I come? Just looking back a few months, my life has taken a 180-degree turn. I haven't ever been this hard in my life and resisted this much. The regret hit me. I wish I could have told Jungkook that I loved him even more. He doesn't even know, but I love him more than myself. But, at the same time, I want Jungkook to prove it. Not by caring, but genuinely showing how I affect him and his life; how my absence makes him sad? Because this is what love is, right? How can he fall in love with me within like a few months or so? I just cannot fall for him this easily; I could be a threat to his career, as well. I can risk my life, but not that. His poster shines in the moonlight, while I slowly doze off to end the hectic day. No more thoughts, just sleep.
But my phone! It started buzzing like crazy.
Who is texting at this moment?
I pick up my phone, seeing it after a long time- 100+ messages on my Instagram? As I open the app, every second kills my curiosity.
In the picture I see, I am stuck.
Jungkook was carrying me in his arms when I fainted.
My eyes would come out anytime. I sat up, opening the explore section.
It's me and Jungkook, everywhere- edits, collages, videos.
He really didn't think about his impression or public appearance. He was genuinely worried. My hands are colder than ice, with my whole body shivering.
What would everyone think? Let's think and not sleep tonight.
***********
I don't know how I will face Jungkook today. I don't know how I will react to the changes he has made, and how will I ignore his concern for me?
I walk to his apartment, all dozy with my body shaking with anxiety. But as soon as the door opened, Jimin's warm hug took all the tension away.
"Noona!" Jimin remained clung, his voice was different than usual. I backed off out of curiosity only to find tears flowing down Jimin's face. He suddenly wipes them off his sleeve.
"Jimin? What?" I asked, pulling his arm from his face.
"You were so sick. It hurt me seeing you lying on the hospital bed with so many machines around you." Jimin's voice is breaking and he is sobbing badly.
I looked around, all the boys, except Jungkook in sight, stood still. Their heads bowed down. I cannot see any one of their faces, just their figures. Something is strange. Why are they all acting like this? I walked to Hobi standing around. How is it possible that he is not smiling? I bow down to see his face.
He is crying.
"Hobiii!!" and as I walked to each one of them, I could see nothing but sadness and tears in their eyes. Even Yoongi.
"You guys. Are you kidding me?" They just sob. "I am okay now! Look at me!" The boys finally clean their faces and look at me. In no time, tears started falling out of my eyes. Their concern for me is something I never even imagined. They all are crying because of me? I turn my back and hold back my muffled voice of crying.
What did I do to deserve them?
Before I could cry out, a big hand cupped my shoulder. And then another tapped my back, another patted my arm and like this, there were hands of hope and love all around my body. I turned back to see all of them standing with their red noses. It made me laugh, out of nowhere, with tears in my eyes.
"We are glad you are okay now, Hana. Just never do this again," says Taehyung's calmed voice.
"I won't, I promise." I smiled back, and the boys did too.
"Enough with this emotional segment, I miss my funny oppas!" The boys passed even a brighter smile now, scattering around the lounge.
"We need to throw a party. Seriously, the last few days were too stressful!" complains Jin.
"Why don't we go to the annual ball?" the voice came from behind me.
Jungkook.
"Oh! I never thought about that! Isn't that around the corner?" says an excited Hobi.
"Next week!" says Namjoon.
"Do you have any plans for the next week, Kookie?" asks Taehyung, as Jungkook walks closer to me.
"It's blank! Golden week, IT'S BLANK!" shouts Namjoon in the air, dancing out his excitement.
Jungkook eyes me, standing right next to me, biting his lower lip.
Stop.
"All right! We are going on the ball!"
"But isn't that public? Like how would Jungkook go?" I asked, ignoring Jungkook's stare.
"No no, there are always two events, a day apart; a private one and a public one. So like all the celebrities go on the private one, and no one really bothers one another there," explains Namjoon, still tiny dancing.
"Umm, okay!" I replied.
"Ah, noona! It is just so good. I attended it two years back and I loved it!" says Jimin, jumping.
"I know why you loved it, Jiminie," says Taehyung, nodding and smiling, mischievously.
"Hmmmmm," follows Jin's naughty stare.
"Can you stop it? Noona is here," Jimin's excitement disappeared, turning him into a small, angry ball.
"It's okay, Jimin! You think I don't know?" I said, winking.
The hall echoed of the boys 'woahs'.
But what was odd was Jungkook's staring at me. He never broke the contact since he walked into the lounge.
What's he thinking?
"You should buy a dress for the ball!" says Taehyung.
"Ahh, sure. I will look for one."
"It's on me," Jungkook's stare finally breaks, along with his silence.
"What?" I shot back.
"I'll buy you the dress," he says, pushing his hands inside his pockets.
"I will do that-"
"Hana, let him do it!" says Namjoon. "He looked after you for days, he deserves a bit of privilege, doesn't he, hyungs?" His expressions were visibly jolly. He was messing around.
Before I could protest, all of them screamed yes.
Who can argue with them? No one.
Jungkook smiled his best as soon as he saw my nod.
God, what is next?
********************