—•—
——
People were touching me poking me, needles were pressed into me.
I took a giant breath and sat straight up.
"Stop! Stop! Stop!" I pulled my knees to my chest, I yanked any needles that were in my arm.
"No, don't touch me!" I looked around four doctors surrounded me they aren't from the Capitol.
"Where am I? Who am I?" I gripped my head and rocked back and fourth. "My name is Cypress Bennett winner of the 70th hunger games." I said.
My hands shook as I looked around.
Two doctors left the others stared at me.
"My friends are Peeta, Roland, Johanna and Beetee." I jumped back at the door opening.
"Cypress!" It took me a second to recognize him.
"Roland!" I screamed and ran to him. "Roland!" I cried, my voice slowly became so painful to speak but I continued to.
"She's gone." I let go of him. "I'm so sorry I couldn't save her. I tried! I really tried." My voice cracked. "Who are you talking about?" "Blossom." "She was in the Capitol?" "Yes! I tried to save her I promise I did! I failed! I'm so sorry."
"It's okay." He pulled me into a hug and rubbed my back. "I'm happy you're alive." "Cypress." I looked past Roland to see a blonde.
He ran up and tried to give me a hug I pushed him back. "Cypress?" "You're a killer!" I screamed at him. "Cypress?"
"Don't say my name! I don't know who you are! I've never met you before and you are a killer!" "Angel?" "Stop! No one calls me that!" I looked at Roland.
"Who is he?" "She doesn't know you?" "It's me?" "You're a killer." Tears brimmed his eyes. "You're a monster."
"Finnick why don't you go." The blonde nodded and left. "You don't recognize him?" "No, I was told he is a killer." "What did they do to you in there Cypress." He pushed back hair that laid on my face.
I just stared at him.
"Where's Peeta?" "In another room." "I want to see him." "It's dangerous, he tried to kill Katniss." "Please Roland. I need to see him." "You need more tests done." "No! No more needles!" I yelled.
"Okay. Okay. No more needles." He rested his hands on my shoulders.
"Roland?" He looked at me. "Who was I before?" "What?" "I don't remember a lot. So, what was I like before?" "Cypress, what do you remember?"
"My name is Cypress Bennett, winner of the 70th hunger games. My friends are Peeta, Roland, Johanna and Beetee. I have a boyfriend named Atom." I said, it felt like I was reading a script.
"That's all you need to know kid, and. Finnick." "The blonde?" "Yes, he's your friend too." "Oh, okay." I know he's a killer but I trust Roland enough to believe him.
And I'm a killer too.
——
"Good evening. Yesterday, I authorized a covert rescue mission inside the Capitol. I am please to announce that the Victors have been liberated." Coin who I still have not properly met spoke.
I stood next to Roland in the crowd of people, my eyes looked back and fourth between Coin and Finnick. He looks sad, I can't help shake the feeling I did that to him. A girl is gripped onto his arm, Annie. I remember her.
A weird feeling was caught in my throat as she held onto his arm tighter.
"My name is Cypress Bennett." I looked down as I tried to focus on what Coin was saying.
"Let this day mark in historic change. With the mockingjay and the Victors beside us, we have sent a clear message to the Capitol. That we will never endure injustice."
Everyone clapped. I looked around theirs lots of people here. Do I know them? Do I just forget them like how I forget myself.
"Today, a day on which we reunited family." Roland's arm went around my shoulders.
"Friends, and loved ones. Let all of Panem come together. Not to battle for the amusement of the Capitol. But to join hands in this fight. Let today be the day we promise never to give up, never to give in until we have made a new Panem, where leaders are elected not to imposed upon us. And where the districts are free to share the fruits of their labors and not fight one another for scraps!"
"Do we like Coin?" I whispered to Roland as people cheered. "I can tolerate her." "Okay. Coin, good." I mumbled the last part to myself.
"This new Panem is on the horizon. But we just take it for ourselves. The road there leads through the sharp mountains and deep ravines of district 2. There in the heart of Panem's steepest mountain range lies the Capitols principal military facility. We can conquer this stronghold because we are one people, one army, one voice. Because today is our new beginning. Today we have freed the victors. Tomorrow, Panem!"
The crowd started to chant.
"Hoorah! Hoorah! Hoorah!" I stayed quiet. I don't have the best feeling about this.
——
After Coins speech I had to go back to room, they wanted to evaluate my memory.
"What's your name." The doctor asked. I saw Rolands shoulder peeking out from the small window on the door. He had an awful time sitting still so he would sway back and fourth when he was nervous.
"My name is Cypress Bennett, winner-." "One question at a time." The man cut me off.
"Which hunger games were you in?" I looked around the room. "70th and the 75th?" "Correct. Who was in your group in the 75th hunger games?"
I knew right away but the image of the television popped up in my mind. A blonde who was not Peeta disappearing.
"Miss Bennett." "Sorry, Roland, Katniss, Johanna, Peeta and Beetee. And there was Wiress but she passed on." The doctor nodded seeming slightly satisfied with my answer.
"How old are you." I opened my mouth to speak since it was such a simple question but I stumbled. "I'm not quite sure, my years of living have fumbled over each other I suppose."
"How old do you think you are?" A memory flashed in my mind.
"Hello my little canvas." She said with a smile. "Hello, you know I'm older than you right?" She kissed both my cheeks and sat me on the stool.
"Yes, but only by a month." "Technically in two weeks we will be the same age. Sorry I'll have to miss it."
"I'm twenty three. Exactly. The same age Emerald would have been." My voice started to trail off my memory taking over my mind.
"She was twenty three. I had time to say happy birthday, but instead she turned into an Avox. And I don't even know if she's dead. She just disappeared. Blossom died. I remember that."
I looked down rage filled me and before I knew it I was screaming.
"I hate memories. You should be glad I don't remember everything! I know I am! Why cant I be happy this one time and forget about my past! Why couldn't I have stayed in the capital until I forgot about everything! The capital didn't do this to me! You did! The capital wanted to help! But instead you ruined there plan you all did!"
As more words fell from my mouth the doctor got up. "Cypress calm down." "No! I deserve this happiness! You can't take that away from me."
But like my entire life has shown me. I have no control.
I shoved and kicked my arm and legs but he still was able to hold me down and give me a shot which made my vision start to blur.
—•—