Jay felt glad.
No. Glad wasn't a strong enough word.
Jay was happy. It was Wednesday, and on Wednesdays, he had his weekly appointment at Doctor Yang's practice.
Thing was, Jay had always felt insecure about himself since childhood. He was lonely and sometimes even angry. He had tried seeing several psychologists, however none of them had helped him.
That was until he met doctor Yang. He was new in town and Jay's parents had heard of him through friends. Jay was hesitant at first. After years of useless consultations, he couldn't imagine this one working.
But it did!
Jay had been seeing doctor Yang for a few months now, and needless to say those appointments were the highlight of his weeks.
At first, Jay didn't talk much, however doctor Yang had showed so much patience with him that eventually, he had opened up to him.
Years of loneliness had been swept away just like that. Even though Jay knew doctor Yang was his psychiatrist, he considered him as a friend.
After all, aren't friends there to show support and help with our problems?
Jay didn't care he was his patient. Doctor Yang was the most important person of his life. Whenever he walked into his office, he felt like home. He felt like he could tell him anything.
Jay gladly shared every secret he had with him.
Well, almost every one of them.
There was one thing he hadn't told him. Yet.
As the weeks had passed by, Jay had noticed how his feelings for doctor Yang had changed. What felt like friendship at first had slowly shifted into romantic interest.
Jay had started dreaming about doctor Yang, both at night and during the day.
He was constantly thinking about him.
Imagining him brought Jay comfort and warmth.
Jay had thought about it a lot. He felt ready to confess to doctor Yang.
He knew it would probably be weird, as he was the patient, and doctor Yang was, well, his doctor.
But Jay didn't care. He needed to express how he felt. He had spent his life feeling bad and only expressing negative things. Now that he had something positive in his life, he wanted to celebrate that.
A big smile spread Jay's lips. In a few minutes, doctor Yang would come in the waiting room to call him. Then, they would go to his office and Jay would be able to confess.
Suddenly, Jay felt a little nervous. The butterflies in his stomach were going insane. He could feel them.
What if he likes me back?
I shouldn't be thinking that. It's more likely that he doesn't.
Which is fine. He doesn't need to love me back.
As long as he's in my life, I'm good.
Better than good.
I'm a boy in Love.
Doctor Yang showed up in the waiting room at that moment. He had a gentle smile on his face, and a shy dimple on his cheek. Jay felt his heart skipping a beat. Doctor Yang was so handsome.
"Hi Jay, ready?" asked the psychiatrist.
"I am!" replied Jay, standing up.
~
"Are you okay?" asked doctor Yang, slightly frowning.
Jay knew that doctor Yang had asked that because he hadn't talked much. It was unusual.
"Actually" said Jay. "I am doing well."
"Good" answered the doctor. "What makes you feel that way?"
"It's a good question" replied Jay. "I know the answer, and I came here wanting to share it with you."
Doctor Yang raised his eyebrows, showing curiosity.
"Tell me" he asked.
Jay stood up. Nervousness had taken control of him. Wasn't it always like that when one was about to confess?
Jay looked into his doctor's eyes. His beautiful eyes. He saw the sweet smile on his face and suddenly the world crumbled below Jay's feet.
He saw everything going black and felt his body falling heavily.
~
"Jay?"
Jay slowly opened up his eyes, adjusting to the bright light of the room.
Where am I?
"Oh, Jay" said a feminine voice next to him.
I know this voice.
"Mom?" asked Jay.
"Yes, honey" she replied, tears in her eyes.
"Where is doctor Yang?" asked Jay, slowly. "I was with him."
Jay saw his mother frowning.
"Jay, sweetie, there is no doctor Yang" she said, slowly passing her hand through his hair.
"What do you mean? I was with him earlier" he asked.
"I don't really know how to tell you that" she started, as tears rolled down her cheeks. "But you've just woken up."
"Yes, what happened?" asked Jay, confused.
Jay didn't understand why she was so upset. He had fainted. That's all.
"You've been in a coma for over a year" she whispered.
"Do you mean that... doctor Yang doesn't exist?" slows asked Jay
She looked quite puzzled.
"I'm afraid not, sweetheart" she said.
Jay laid his head back into the pillow. He couldn't believe what was happening.
The worst thing wasn't the coma. It wasn't the wasted year. The worst thing was that doctor Yang wasn't real.
His only friend wasn't real.
The person he thought was the love of his life wasn't real.
"Let me call the nurse" said Jay's mom.
~
A few minutes later, they heard knocks, followed by the sound of a door opening.
"Good morning" said the nurse.
"Oh, you're here, thank you" replied Jay's mother.
Jay looked up and almost fainted.
The nurse was looking at him, a sweet smile on his lips. He had big bright eyes and-
"I don't think we've met before, as I'm new here, but I'm Yang Jungwon" said the nurse, a wild dimple on his cheek.