I wake up to my alarm at 7:45. I then get out of bed and brush my hair and teeth and wash my face. I then go back into my room where I get on a black and white hoodie. It had a white torso with black sleeves and a hood. I then put on black leggings and my black smiley face hat. I added a few chains and then put on my basic black and white Nike shoes. I then put my hair back into a ponytail. I checked my phone to see the group chat making sure everyone was awake, I responded that I was indeed awake and then responded to a few random Snapchats. I continued my journey and went downstairs as Techno slides me a cup of cereal.
"I already brushed my teeth," I said blowing my minty breath at him.
"Do you want to eat carnival food instead? That stuff is good for snacks but as meals they are disgusting," He says and I don't know if he is tricking me or not. I have never been to a carnival so I have no clue. I trust Techno though so I groan and sit down eating my cup of cereal. While I am eating Tommy and Wil come down, eating their breakfasts. Once I am done, I throw away my cup and Phil comes down the stairs.
"Thought you said you were leaving by 8:45," Phil says yawning. Techno then looks down checking his phone to realize it is 8:43.
"You guys ready?" Techno asks.
"One second," Wil says as he grabs a Monster from the fridge, "Now I am ready," He says and you can hear the snap of the Monster can crack open. Then we say goodbye to Phil and head out into the car. We drive over to the carnival and end up getting there at 8:57. I look around for my friends and see Drista, Lani, Tubbo, Dream, George, Sapnap, Karl, and Quakity. Then I and my brothers walk over to them and say hello. After a few minutes, everyone showed up. Wil and all of his friends left the group and so did Tommy and his friends.
"You guys can go off if you meet us back here at 12:30 and make sure to keep in contact with us," Dream says sternly.
"Yes, we will! Can we go on rides and stuff now," Drista whines, and Dream laughs.
"Of course. Stay safe, call or text us if you need anything," Dream says and then we all run away toward the first ride we planned to go on the blade. It was a ride where we sat in a big boat and it swayed us super high back and forth. I have never been on any sort of ride before so I was a little nervous but I didn't let it bother me. I had a strange gut feeling that something was going to go wrong today but I brushed it off as nerves and continued waiting in line talking to my friends.
"I am so excited for today, I love these games and rides!" Eryn said and Drista agreed.
"Rides are scary though," Lani said, and Hannah agreed.
"I like rides but they are pretty scary," Freddie said.
"I have never been on any sort of ride before, so we'll see," I said shrugging my shoulders.
"Wait, you have never been to like a carnival or amusement park?" Drista exclaims.
"Yeah, I never have," I say shying away a bit because of the volume increase.
"How? They are so much fun! Even though they can be scary," Freddie says.
"Well, none of my foster parents ever took me to one," I say and then notice how their faces got kind of sad, "I am very excited to go there though," I say happily, attempting to lighten the mood. I see their faces perk up a bit and then we go onto the blade. We slide into a seat toward the back. Then the ride starts we all grip onto the bar in front of us and then we start swinging, slowly getting higher and higher. Screams started emerging from people on the ride until I am almost being lifted out of my seat. I float up and then down slightly and let out a slight scream. The ride then slows and we get off and head to new rides. We have a fun time on rides before Lani says we should take a break and play some games. So that's what we did. We first went to a balloon popping game. I have good aim because well, I play softball, so I pop the first balloon and the second, and then the rest of the balloons with all of the darts I have. They all scream behind me because I won the jackpot and get to pick a huge stuffed animal. I choose the giant pink pig because it's Techno's mascot and then start to carry it around. Drista ended up winning a medium prize during the same game and got a dog stuffed animal. Lani and Hannah ended up winning small prizes on a different game so they both got dolphins, Lani's is yellow and Hannah's is pink. Then, Eryn won a medium prize and picked a shark. And Freddie, well he won a goldfish, a pet goldfish. When he won it we all laughed and he started carrying it around. After all of the games we played, it was 12:23 so we started to walk toward the meeting spot. After a minute all of them walk up to us and they laugh at all of our toys and the fish.
"You need a spot to put that all, is that a fish?" George says and starts giggling confused halfway through his sentence.
"You guys can put it in my car, or Dream's," Techno says and then we walk over to the two cars loading in the stuffed animal and putting the fish in a cup holder, "Nice pig," Techno says down to me.
"Hey, I won the jackpot for that don't be sarcastic with me," I say acting offended.
"You picked a giant pig," Techno states.
"Yeah, I did. Guess why, because it reminded me of you," I say and his face lights up.
"Oh, wait is it because of my youtube-"
"Because you act like a pig," I say cutting him off and then he attacks me. Swooping me up and holding me above his head. "It was a joke, it is because of your mascot dude," I say, and the scream because he fake drops me.
"You are evil," he says laced with sarcasm spinning around. I hear laughs coming from everyone else and then he sets me down.
"Now I am dizzy," I say stumbling back as laughs come from my friends.
"Well, are you guys hungry or anything? Or are you all okay?" Dream says.
Luckily before I could even process Drista and Eryn shouted, "Yes! Food! Please!" I laugh uncomfortably but everyone was laughing so I blent in.
"Well then, let's get some food!" Sapnap yells and we head over to the food area. I just listen in when everyone is discussing and our group agrees on getting 2 nachos to share and each of us can get a drink, and if we want something else we can. Of course, I say I am just going to have the shared nachos and a coca-cola but Hannah is similar; She is only getting an Icee and the shared nachos. Freddie and Lani are getting some skittles, Drista is getting Airhead extremes, and Eryn is getting Doritos. I have no clue what the other group is getting but that doesn't matter. I wait for everything to be ordered and handed out while joking around with everyone and then we walk over to a clean red picnic table. We sit down and I grab a few nachos to look normal with my friends but I make sure not to have a lot. They taste really good but the way it feels down my throat makes me want to puke. I keep calm though. As I am talking I see Techno side-eyeing me, making sure I am eating. I am eating a bit so he looks pleased.
After about 15 minutes we say our goodbyes and go back out to the rides. We start running around and make sure the first few rides aren't crazy. Eryn's eyes then light up, "SPEED!" He screams. I look at the huge white ride. I see the white hand-spinning in a giant circle, sending the people inside hundreds of feet in the air. I look up in shock.
"I'm going to sit this one out," Lani says.
"I agree," Hannah says.
"Well, Me, Freddie, Eryn, and Y/n it is. We need 4 people!" Drista says and skips toward the line. I didn't want to be difficult, even though I was extremely scared, so I tagged along. We waited in a short line as I listened to people scream and terror and cry coming off of it. I squeezed my nails into my palm but everyone else was too excited to notice. Then, it was our turn. I step onto the big metal platform where the ride resigns. I take a deep breath. I continue to walk toward the seating for the ride. I walk around to the other side with Drista. We then walk up the steps that were dragged out for us and sit in our seats. I pull down my restraint and buckle it in. The operator comes along and tightens it, making sure it is secured, and then we slowly lift into the air. The clouds become closer and the chance of death becomes greater. Then we are stopped right at the top, looking at the rides that go on for miles and the houses forever away. I glance up and look at the clear blue sky and then back down to see my impending doom. "The wait is the worst part but it is also so fun," Drista says loudly, so Eryn and Freddie can also hear behind us.
"So true! You hate and love it at the same time," Eryn yells back.
"I think I just hate it," Freddie rebuttals, and we all laugh.
"Agreed," I say, "But the view is so cool." A few anxiety-inducing seconds later and we are going down. The speed goes from zero to one hundred in seconds. I am being flown toward the ground and shot back up, spinning upside down and then back right-side-up along with going in another huge circle. We all scream as the wind speeds against our faces. Watching myself almost hit the ground then fly right back up into the air almost instantaneously in a never-ending loop. Soon enough we are at the bottom, completely stopped. Until, the ride started moving again, but backward. I fall forward because of the cart spinning itself and I am hanging upside down. The ride repeats itself except this time I am mostly upside down and have no idea where I am going, barely being able to comprehend where I just was. We then come to a stop at the bottom, for the second time, and we all get out. I stumble out of the seat and am cringing. The repeated motion of falling, from a deathful limit, over and over. It didn't feel good, but it also did at the same time. I try to shake the thoughts about falling to my death from my head and manage to somewhat do so. I keep on going with my day and we keep going on rides and having fun. Well, we were having fun. Unknown to me, the people that beat me up were there and were now standing right in front of my face. I had just chosen to sit out for a ride with Lani, and she was up throwing away garbage. I stare into Joey's eyes, with pain and fire behind them. I don't know what to do so panic rises through even though I want to push it down. I slide my fingers on my phone to call and toward Techno's name but when I look down Joey smacks me across the face. Hard. Not hard enough to bleed but it's gonna leave a bruise. I quickly attempted to click on Techno's name as my phone was knocked out of my hand and onto the rough grass.
"What do you want from me?" I say standing up and asserting my dominance.
"I want you to suffer," He says winding his hand back.
"Why?" I say and his hand comes crashing in, I quickly duck to dodge it but that makes him angry. His friend behind him comes rushing in to try and take me down and he rushes in from the other side. "GET OFF OF ME!" I screech throwing a punch at Joey's face. Which hits and leaves a trail of blood on my hand and his face but he takes me and pins me to the ground. I kick and squirm until his friend takes his spot and he punches me across the face. I keep resisting and fighting. Trying to get loose from his grip. I get a kick and another one to the gut and then the hands release from me. I see Techno and Dream holding the guys by their hoods.
"What the fuck did I say last time," Techno spits, "Stay away from my sister." With that, he drops him, and they runoff. I stand up and Techno lifts me when I am almost at my feet. Swiftly turning around and sitting on the bench. "It's okay," He says calming me down as I notice the tears from my eyes. I look at the blood on my hands and the grass stains and dirt on my outfit. I wince and then hug Techno. I feel a presence next to me, which I look over and it's Dream.
"Your phone isn't broken by the way," He says and I giggle. I feel Techno relax for a second too and I adjust to wipe my tears.
"I'm okay," I say looking him in the eyes.
"Looks like you got a good punch off."
"Yeah, that's progress I guess," I say and giggles emerge from the older boys.
"Just barely got that phone call off," Techno says, "Impressive."
"I wish I could say that was all a part of the plan but this was improved," I say sarcasm fluently in my voice. The laughs only get stronger from the two boys and I join in. Lani comes walking back and the rest of my group does too. I look at my body and realize questions will arise. They all start running toward me and before anyone can say anything I say, "Joey and his friends came along got a few punches in, so did I. Techno and Dream superman style saved the day," I clear up and their faces go to talk but I interrupt again, "And I am okay." Dream and Techno laugh but my friends hug me in shock. They end up going back with their friends and we keep walking around the park. We go on some more rides and just hang out recording videos and playing games. We end up meeting up with everyone at 8:30. We all walk over to a huge open field with only a few people around and we lay on large blankets. I lay back staring at the sunset and taking a picture. I am sitting in the middle of all my friends and we all take group selfies. I giggle at everyone's funny faces before saving it. I end up getting a few selfies with Eryn and Drista, who were sitting next to me as the day finally disappears. When it does I hear a crack and immediately panic. Gunshot. I look up and see red in the air. Fireworks? I shiver at the thought but lay back. Another. Bang. Flashes of the ice cream shop.
Bang. The car.
Bang, bang. The parking spot.
Bang. My fault.
Boom. They're dead.
Bang. I am dying.
Boom. I am in the hospital.
Bang. I'm snapped back into reality.
I quickly wipe my cheek, flushing the single tear out of existence. I focus on the colors. I attempt to drown out the sounds and thoughts. But that ends up being more difficult than expected. They keep going and I try my best to enjoy them but I physically can't. I look over toward the rest of our huge group. Techno, Tommy, Wilbur, all seem invested and are chatting with their friends. Why am I so weak? I cringe and start to panic. I hold my breath. I look up. Tilting my head up, slightly. Don't show weakness. Don't be a burden. Don't ruin everyone's lives. Again. I squeeze on my hands. Blood peaks at the surface. I start to get lightheaded. I time my breath with a firework so people don't hear and are distracted by most. I then hold it again. I put my head back normal and touch my glossy eyes. I haven't calmed down. My presence has though. I watch the beautiful reds and blues pop in the air. I see the beauty but feel worthless and pained. My fault. Burden. Worthless. Killer. Soon enough the noise stops. Then, the worst thing ever. The finale fireworks. They all come off, one following another. They don't even explode but the next one is right behind it. I breathe out and then hold my breath. Shaking. I push my hands into the ground to stabilize myself. I feel the rush of death and the burden on my shoulder. Them yelling in my ear "YOU KILLED US!" After what felt like hours, the fireworks come to end. I stand up and so does everyone else. Scattered opinions about what they all claim to be 'amazing' fireworks come and I just nod along. Then, we all walk to the cars that were driven here, and all of us, somehow, with a lot of squishing and a few people on the ground of the car, drop everyone off and drive home. We play some tunes which makes me feel better. I am squished in a corner in the very back up against the car wall and Eryn. We are both jamming out and it takes my mind off everything. I let myself bounce to the music and we all giggle.
Soon enough we arrive home and everyone else is dropped off. I walk inside and I am exhausted. So instead of making conversation with Phil and everyone else I go up to my room and immediately flop on my bed and sleep. I don't even think. I am simply exhausted.
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