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⇒ Blueprint Apartments
10:30am
He didn't wait too long, right? Because, after all, he needed his own break from everything just like Changbin right? He needed to let go too- he needed to take that breather from everyone too but, standing there in front of that body-length mirror in his bedroom with glossed lips, a cozy outfit, and a pastel blue beret to match, even though it had been three weeks, Felix still did not feel fully ready to face Chan.
But he had to, and he knew that. He had been bluffing for way too long and, maybe Kai's birthday was the best timing for such a thing; replace the anniversary date of a recently ended love with the confession of another. Yes, sounded about right. And with the way that Chan had been caring for him over the period of time with so much humility and understanding as if he still was not convinced that he had nothing to do with Felix's breakup was enough surety for the latter's heart.
He smiled at his reflection, soft and small, as he reminisced on just how loving Chan had proven himself to be; from everyday rides to simple checkups, and he sighed contently as his fingers traced over the silver letters on the necklace that his child's father had gifted him. Yes, Felix may have not been ready for the possibility of rejection or anything along that line but, standing there, he could safely conclude that he was prepared.
So grabbing the wrapped up present from his nightstand, and strolling out into the living room; decorated with balloons and posters of the child's favorite cartoons, and a pile of gifts in front of the television that were brought in doubles and triples by Felix's friends; he really did appreciate them.
"Minho," he called at the brunette in the kitchen, faking an apologetic look at the realization that he had interrupted a rather interesting conversation between the older and another familiar male. "Jeongin, hey."
"Hey," Jeongin smiled, nodding, kind of nervous even though Felix had willingly invited him over for that celebration. "H-how are you? I placed the gift I bought him over there," he pointed to where the others were, making every effort to avoid eye contact with Felix, but blushing when his hopefully-soon-to-be lover snaked an arm around his lower waist.
Faking a gag, Felix nodded, bowing and mumbling a low, "Thank you," as he attended to his ringing phone. "Hey," he answered, his small smile dimming when his ex spoke over the line. They hadn't spoken in a while, and Felix wasn't sure whether it was choked-up tears that had Changbin's voice so raspy, or if he had just woken up. "H-how are you?"
"I'm good," Changbin sighed, gulping thickly to keep his sobs from being sold out over the phone whilst his shaky hand had him straining to write out a few words on the card that he wanted to give to the birthday boy. "W-where's the big boy?"
"With Chan," Felix sighed, taking a seat at the dining table, and smiling warmly at the beautifully decorated Pororo Penguin cake laying there; four blue and yellow candles topping the icing off. "We wanted to make kind of a surprise party... Me, some friends... and Chan... It isn't much, but it's the best I could do considering everything..."
"You're doing great," Changbin coughed, clenching his jaw gratingly and closing his eyes to keep back the cry that threatened to escape his throat. He couldn't allow Felix to witness his lowest after everything that had happened, no. Gosh, he didn't even want to hear his own self cry, especially since he had promised himself to move on quickly- but, obviously, that alone had proven to be quite implausible, especially when the second of October was supposed to grant him two whole years with the- with who he thought was the love of his life. "I'm sending over his birthday present in a while..."
"Thank you," Felix sighed, leaning back in his chair, "very much, Binnie. I- I'm sure he'll love it once it's from you... And take care of yourself, okay? I- I know it's different but... I do love you, okay? Don't- don't let today be a bad day for you... please? And I'll- I'll bring you a slice of cake tonight... as well as other things we made... I'm sure Kai'd want to see you..."
"Could you bring it tomorrow instead?" Changbin sniffled, not sparing the male who had just walked into his apartment to collect the box-shaped present a glance from his red eyes. "I understand everything but... today just isn't- I'm not in it today... I'll be able to smile for him genuinely...tomorrow."
"Okay..." Felix hummed, sighing when the older wasted no time before hanging up. And he could've sworn that he heard a choked sob in the last few seconds before the call ended but, Felix didn't deem it fit to dwell on that. Because it was his son's birthday; Kai's big day- the day that he was to confess his undying love for someone else.
So standing, he trodded over to the two males' side in the kitchen to help with the other food and beverages that they were preparing, and a wide grin was quick to stretch and scatter his freckles, lightly coated with concealer, when a loud pattern of knocks was sounded at his front door.
Scurrying over to the door to open up, he chuckled, hearty, widening his arms to first engulf Seungmin in a hug, and then his fiancé, careful not to disrupt the gift in his hold.
"Hyunjin, Seungmin," he greeted, letting them in, "Thank you for coming... even if-"
"Lix," Hyunjin stopped him, resting the present on the table whilst his social butterfly of a partner made his way over to the kitchen to befriend the two strangers, "just because you two aren't together, it doesn't mean that our friendship has to change, okay? We're still uncle Hyune and MinMin to Kai, okay? And never hesitate to ask us for anything."
"Thank you," Felix pouted, touched, looking down. "Thank you very much... I'm grateful for you guys, honestly."
"Us for you too," Hyunjin chuckled, patting Felix's head and making him giggle, "you're doing a great job. But anyway, what time is the birthday boy going to be here?"
"His dad, I assume Changbin told you about, is taking him out for breakfast, so he'll be here at about eleven or twelve," Felix shrugged, closing his eyes and stretching, too caught up in a yawn to notice the deep gulp that Hyunjin had to take to be able to speak up again.
"Oh," he looked down, unsure whether to sell out the fact that he knew Chan or not so soon. "Well," he settled on the latter, also strolling over to the kitchen, "we'll just wait then. I hope he enjoys everything."
-
"Happy birthday Kai-Kai!" All of the males shouted simultaneously as Chan walked in with a bubbly toddler on his back, and they each cooed when the child started clapping and giggling at their unexpected presence.
"Kai, baby," Felix smiled, walking over to Chan's back to take the toddler down and, to meet expectation, hugging the latter to greet him properly. "Happy birthday! How are you feeling?"
"Happy!" Kai grinned, nodding and hugging Felix tightly before twisting and turning to get down on his own two feet. "Uncle HoHo," he scurried over to Minho, his young mind not at all considering how embarrassing one could get when such a nickname, though innocent, was publicized. Letting go of his favorite uncle, Kai then ran up to Seungmin, and then Hyunjin, ringing his nicknames for them even after letting go and, hysterically skipping around in circles for a few seconds before settling in a judgmental gaze at Jeongin; Felix already knew that he'd be out like a light, not far into the night, after using up so much energy.
"Who is that?" Kai whispered into the person that he was nearest to's knee; Hyunjin. "And where's Binnie?"
Hearing that, Felix strolled up to his son's side, stooping down and stroking a bit of hair back behind his ear. "That's Jeongin," he pointed at the named male, each participant too caught up in the child's innocence to take note of Hyunjin's and Chan's subtle glares at each other; the black-haired started it, of course, and Chan just hoped that he wouldn't act so immaturely as to start any argument on a day like that.
"And Binnie can't come today," Felix tiredly faked a smile, ruffling Kai's hair. "But he sent you a gift though... and we can go see him tomorrow..."
"He really isn't coming back?" Kai barely whispered, his lower lip already quivering and, one fist lifting to rub over his eyes, "Can't we see him today...?"
"Kai-Kai," Felix sighed, feeling hopeless, "we spoke about this... But don't worry right now, okay? It's your birthday, and we're all here to make you happy, hm?"
"Is Sunhee coming?" Kai's eyes lit up a bit, but he pouted at the confused look forming on his father's face.
"Sunhee?" Felix arched a brow, tilting his head and looking around in hopes of detecting a knowing expression on any of the guests' faces. "Who's Sunhee, pumpkin?"
"My friend," Kai whined, slapping a palm over his face; and Felix could safely assume, based on times spent with Chan, that the child had picked up such habit from him. "I told Channie about her," he pointed at his other dad with a childish, kitten glare, "she's my only friend! We met in Channie's office."
"Well," Felix sighed, standing fully and shooting a warning smile Chan's way, and scoffing, jokingly, at the nervous manner in which the latter's hand found and scratched his nape. "Maybe Channie forgot to tell me," he matched the snicker that Hyunjin had let out, shaking his head when the toddler folded his arms, disappointed. "Maybe we could organize for her to spend your birthday with you next year?"
"But daddy," Kai whined, his youthfully heavy tongue letting out his words kind of soft and jumbled; or maybe that was just a lisp that neither of his parents had taken a not of yet. "I want to spend it with her today. Not just adults," he looked around the room, and Felix had to cock his head with eyes on Chan as he questioned, internally, what the hell the older was showing him on TV. "Channie, can you call Ms. Kim? Please? Pretty please please please?"
"Oh, your assistant's kid?" Felix questioned, nodding lightly to give the others an "ok" to shift from their awkward stances to other parts of the apartment for more comfortable interaction. "How could you forget that then?" He punched Chan's arm playfully, satisfied when the older man pulled out his phone.
"I'll call her," Chan showed Kai the screen, combing a hand through his hair. Sighing when the woman picked up, he spoke again, moving to a corner of the room out of sheer reflex to talk privately. "Hey, Jisoo," Chan chuckled when Kai crawled up behind him, the child's puppy eyes ridding any thought to even get him out of there. "It's Chan, I wanted to ask you something."
"What's up?" The woman greeted from the other line, her smooth tone selling out just how relaxed she was that Saturday. "You don't usually call unless it's work, or Kai wanting to talk to Sunhee."
"Yeah, it's about Sunhee," Chan chuckled, folding one arm across his chest, "Today is Kai's birthday, and Sunhee is like his only friend, so he wanted her to come over."
"Oh-"
"But before you say anything, I know it's late notice. He asked me beforehand, but I forgot to bring it up... He's having a birthday party right now, but it's filled with adults and, I mean, I get where the little guy's coming from," he laughed when Kai clung onto his leg, still gazing up with wide eyes. "So is it possible for her to come over? We could pick her up and bring her back, but if not, I understand..."
"Are there any women?" Jisoo asked sternly, the strain in her voice giving off the fact that she was standing from her comfort. "I mean, she's my daughter, I have the right to be protective, you know?"
"N-no there aren't," Chan bit his lip, looking down and thinking of a way out. "But, you can come if you want to. I understand your concern, and I respect that, so we have no problem with you coming along! You don't even have to bring anything, and I'd send you the address..."
And at that, the new brightness of Jisoo's smile practically radiated over the phone, as well as the contentment behind her daughter's giggles when she whispered the plans near her ear. "Well in that case, sure. We're going to get ready, and we'll be there soon, okay? And about the gift, she had one for him already. We just weren't sure of the exact date, so I planned on asking you on Monday."
"Oh, well I'm glad things worked out like this," Chan flashed Kai a thumbs up, him as well as all of the other adults letting out a chain of laughter when the child started screaming and chanting his friend's name around the house. "Thank you, Jisoo. You made Kai really happy, so we look forward to seeing you two."
"I'm glad," she smiled, searching for an outfit. "See you in a few."
-
The day couldn't get any better, could it? Goodness, things were going so great that Felix even thought that something bad would happen afterward. Kai was happy with his little toddler friend and, her mother was getting along pretty well with the other guests even without Chan. Everyone was just so much at peace.
Well, everyone except him, because his plan to confess everything to Chan was still eating him up inside no matter how hard he tried to organize the right lines so, despite his smiles and laughter and giggles and songs, Felix was not settled. His heart fluttered aggressively with every glance that he'd send Chan's way, whether accidental or on purpose.
He couldn't help but feel dazed anytime he'd admire, from a distance, the older's features for too long and, his conscience raged, not from guilt for leaving Changbin or anything like that, but from threat and a different type of guilt that demanded he make something happen that night.
And Felix was in no place to object, so glancing over at the wall clock, he sighed; seven-thirty. It was time, wasn't it? People were lazing down, and Kai was in some corner playing with his friend so, why not then? It could be one of those sweet moments where the two love birds sneak out to talk and kiss and maybe... start something new?
Yes, so he stood up, brushing his thighs self-consciously, and strolling over to Chan's back at the dining table; he was on his phone, reading some report that probably only Jisoo could interpret among them all.
"Channie?" He ignored the low, cartoon-type music to call, soft and timid and, somewhat scared to even go further. Tensing up when the other blonde turned to face him with a small smile and deep breath, he nipped at his bottom lip then spoke again, fingers fiddling with each other behind his back. "I- I want to talk to you... can we go outside? On the balcony...in my room...?"
"Sure," Chan hummed, somewhat confused yet kind of hopeful, but not willing to draw up any imagination of Felix's lips finally meeting his- yeah, that seemed too farfetched for the moment. So humbly, he stood to follow the boy into the larger bedroom, praying that nobody had eyes on them to possibly get the wrong idea. Arriving on the cooler platform, he gazed down and out at the busy streets and buildings, soaking in the early night's air before asking a question. "What's up?"
"I -I lied," Felix stated bluntly, and after that sentence, he knew that he could not sugarcoat anything anymore. "I lied when I said that you had nothing to do with Bin and I's break up," he looked down, bouncing on his heels anxiously. "But don't feel bad because... it's still not exactly you... it was me... who..."
"What? You who what?" Chan huffed, leaning against the railing weakly, only hoping that it was strong enough to withstand his weight.
"Fell for you..."
"What?"
"I fell for you... C- Chan..." Felix looked up and into his eyes, gazing, heart skipping a beat with each second that passed by with neither of their blinks. And he almost felt bad at Chan's speechlessness but, it was more than understandable. So stamping down the doubt that had already started to weaken his knees, he spoke again, hoping to bring more clarity to his words. "I- I fell in love with you, Chan... and I- I understand if you don't feel-"
Oh...
Something happened. Was it a dream? Felix did not know. Felix could not think.
And Felix's mind was suddenly in so much chaos that it could hardly process the pink, moist clouds that had met his lips.
Chan's lips were soft.
Really soft.
Really. Fucking. Soft.
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[A/N]
I think we all know what happened in the end there...👀
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1. What do you think about Changbin's decision to skip Kai's birthday party? Justifiable or unjustifiable?
2. Thoughts on Felix's confession?
3. What do you think will happen next?