Lisa's POV
"We have audited the accompanying consolidated balance sheets of all departments as of January to October and the related consolidated statement of operations...."
I pierce my eyes on the presentation of the balance sheet for the three quarters this year but my mind drifted back a month ago.
I left him in his container house and finally put an end to my delusion but for the whole month I've been hearing his voice all over again in my head like guilt is forcing me to go back and tell him it's okay.
That he is worth the risk, but how can I be so sure that he is? When the man himself wasn't sure of his own feelings.
"Do you not like me?"
"I thought you feel the same..."
No, I already fallen in love with him. I knew it deep within me for these past weeks. I knew I love him now. Not as an idol, I look up to, but as a man. Him as Jeon Jungkook.
"It's not their life to make.. I choose who I want to love..."
I'm such a liar. To make an excuse about his fans will not support him if he ever dates me, it's not about his fans. Being dragged and threatened by his fans is the least of my worries.
They ain't gonna do anything about it, in fact they would be more shock than hate, in my perspective. Imagine a kpop idol being in a relationship with the richest person in all Asia?
No stupid fan would threat an influential person like me. That's basically baiting a fish over a hungry cat,
It's a death trap for them.
And also, I decided to continue living the name Kwon Lisa at least for two months, cause I'm not that stupid. I know that building was his newly built building and the original rental fee of that huge apartment wasn't 300 hundred won, the room he showed was actually the biggest room and has at least 900-1M rental fee and other dues are excluded.
How did I know? They forgot to cover the rental fees guideline and his name as the building owner on the last part of the contract. And it would be weird if I leave the place just because of some stupid love problems, if it can be called a love problem.
But it's all over, I know everything we had shared before was just temporary enjoyment? Happiness?
He doesn't deserve being deceived, he deserves everything in the world. And me? I'd go back to the same workaholic person I was. Succumbing myself to reports and codings, just continuing the life I made in this lifetime.
"The 57% balance of accounts receivable was $50.6 million and the remaining 43% was the external parties of $30.4 million." "That's it for the report for the three quarters Vice Chairwoman Han....."
"Vice Chairwoman?"
"Ms Han?"
I was startled when they all looked at me with a confused reaction. I never get lost in such an important presentation every quarter ends but I already read the written report last night so it's no matter.
"Give me the written financial report for the last quarter, and send the inventory list to Ms Kim so she and I can double check on it" I composed myself, sitting straight.
"Yes Ms Lisa, I already have it prepared" the presenter said.
"Very well then, this meeting is adjourned" I said, standing up from my seat and going back to my office.
As soon as I entered my own office, I went straight to my interconnected closet room and change my dress to a much more comfortable clothes. His Hoodie to be exact, a black fitted pants and Adidas shoes.
"Are you going for a run?" Jennie appeared with a five file case on her hand looking at me confusedly.
"No, i'm going Kwon" we had this silly saying that when I said 'I'm going Kwon' means pretending to be Kwon Lisa, and vise versa.
"Are you going home already?" She asked me, and I nodded my head.
"Yes, put it on my backpack, I'll read it in my apartment" I said, tying the ribbon of my shoes then my eyes went back to where she was putting the file case on my black backpack.
"Jen?" I caught her attention.
"Hmm?"
"Do you want to drink soju at my house?" I asked her and both of us looked at each other.
"Okay," We decided to go home a bit earlier than usual . She usually goes home by 7pm and me almost at midnight considering that I have my own penthouse in my own building.
We went to a convenient store nearby first using her car and bought 10 bottles of soju, chips, and a whole fried chicken all for us. As soon as we entered my room, we decided to watch Pride and Prejudice while drinking.
"So why did you invite me here all of the sudden?" Jen broke our silence.
"I'm confused," I said plainly,
"Who wouldn't be... it's because you're too selfless you forgot to pursue your own happiness" She said, and I looked at her.
"You're really such a great pretender, a liar" she said "You told me before that day that you're starting to love him, but now you're crying like this because you left him there"
"What?" I held my cheeks slowly and felt the liquid that had left on my left eye.
"I-I'm such a coward" I sobbed "I know, I'm already in love with him that's why before it go deeper and I could hardly deny myself I have to end this bitch feeling"
"Lis.."
"But you know what? After a month without him, I felt like i'm being torn apart.. I badly want to meet him and tell him that I love him but I'm too afraid of the world"
"After I return back time, and achieved all of my wishes on my first life, everyone who knows me... sees me as a token of success" "They don't want me as woman who would love them, they want me as a tool for their own greed, authority, to gain power just because they think women aren't capable of co-ruling this masculine dominated world"
"But for once, after 24 years of my life in this lifetime, I found someone who doesn't even know me as Han Lalisa," I paused, "Kwon Lisa may have been a great liar about her true identity but I showed him who I was truly" "I showed him myself and not the cold Vice Chairwoman of LiHan Empire"
"He accepted me even without knowing who I was or where I came from, he didn't question my intentions for accepting all his invites and he treated me like a true woman on a date that Hanbin never ever did for me" "Taking me to a museum date, making breakfast for me, giving me my favorite flower, randomly calling me, sending me good morning messages"
"We've known each other for a week but he had already done so much than that dickhead had given me!!" I yelled.
"That fucking shitty head made me believe that he loved me for the a year we had shared, but all those times he just used me to make that Nabi jealous to get her and satisfy his lust after our arguments to make me shut up"
"FUCK THE STUPID FIRST LIFE I HAD IS ALL WRONG!!!" I messed up my hair.
"Did he?"
"Yes!" "Our huge arguments always have been and always will because of that woman.. he ditched our first anniversary because of that woman, He never asked me for a date!!" "It's always me who beg for his time, for his attention, for his love but I was foolish and blinded because he was the first person who loved me but I was wrong!" "He just wanted my body... that's all what he wants".
I wiped the tears on my cheeks, I thought our love was real before but now that I finally realize that I was just blinded by what I thought was a good memory that we shared.
He is my first love, and I was too innocent about love and newbie about the tenancy of love, because he was the first man to ever love me and took me out of the darkness of my past after being bullied for years but now I realize that I was just fooling myself for waiting to a person who doesn't even deserve me.
"He did that?"
I was startled by Jen's serious voice and found myself shivering from her cold gaze on the TV like she wanted to murder Mr. Dorsey.
"Why do you look like you're gonna murder Mr. Dorsey?" I saw a smirk on her face.
"Oh I will"
"What?"
— 한 리사 —
"KIM JENNIEEE!!!"
Everyone was startled by my voice when I yelled for my best friend's name in her own office near the executive department. I saw their shock, and some have already prayed for their own lives not knowing why I'm angry all of the sudden.
"Where is Jennie?"
I turned my gaze to the trembling person near me who already had his paper scattered on the carpeted floor when he heard me screaming.
"On h-her of-office Ms Han"
I didn't thank him nor look at him for another second before stomping my feet walking like a fireball going to her office. As soon as I entered her office, she was startled by banging my heels on the door while she was facing the panoramic view of Seoul talking to someone.
"Explain," I said before closing the door, and taking a seat to the one man chair facing her desk while crossing my legs.
"What do I need to explain?" She ended the call, and faced me instead leaning herself on the side of her front desk.
"Why did you do that to the construction department?" I asked, she creased her brows searching for answers on the ceiling.
"Jen" I closed my eyes pinching space between my brows "The head of the firm is begging me to stop you for torturing the new comers"
"Really??!" "Are they having a hard time?" She asked with a big smile on her face, giggling, and clapping her hand with joy.
"Oh god, you really did?!" "They don't even know me Jen, we know each other from my past life, not this lifetime!" I shook my head.
"SO WHAT?! They tortured your heart in their past life so they need to suffer the consequence of their previous actions!!!" "Giving them a lot of field and paperworks while being paid so much more than ordinary companies out there?! They should thank you for allowing them to have a good portfolio for their future!"
"On my perspective that wasn't even a torture enough, they need more punishment!!" She yelled back.
"Bu—"
"No but or I'll fucking kick you in the ass and throw you off on this fucking building do you understand?!!!!!" I was startled by her, she looks like she's going to kill me if I say another word.
"Y-yes Maam"
I rest my back on her chair and saw a huge smile on her face like she achieved a lot before going towards me.
"Do you want to eat lunch with me?" She offered.
"Ste-Steak and wine?"
"Alright babe, let's go" She said before we exited the room laughing about how scary she looks like yelling at me while holding hands, making everyone dumbfounded by seeing rainbows in our head after setting it on fire earlier.
And as the time went by we ate our lunch in a luxurious restaurant near the building before heading back to our offices to continue working for the rest of the day and before I knew it the time had already hit 10pm.
I changed my office attire to a very cozy nude color hoodie, a black leggings, running shoes, and a warm black coat. A very typical outfit I used to wear in the past where I'm just a normal citizen of this country.
I grabbed my black backpack, slid my laptop and a few other reports inside before going out of my office to start my walk going kwon for the night again, just continuing the life that I acted.
I wore my hood and wore a mask as soon as I got out of the building, luckily there are not many employees at these hours besides the night shift and graveyard shifts employees entering the building.
They don't really give a fuck to someone who doesn't look like an executive employees so it's fine. It's not that I'm complaining that they aren't bowing their heads, I'm much more comfortable with them ignoring me.
I walk past the streets and watch the people doing their own business. The days are getting colder and colder. I just hope everything I prepared for the 24 years of this lifetime wouldn't be in vain.
Just few more months Lisa, few more.
You would say this life is better than having a normal life in Daegu in my past life. Having this empire, owning a lot of real estate in and out of South Korea, even having a hectare where our main house mansion was built is a better life.
It's not easy to be an influential woman. I became their jackpot prize, fighting themselves off giving me a lot of gifts and proposals for marriage ever since I turned 18.
I felt afraid of the thoughts of them harming me because I knew they have that capacity to do that. That's why I cannot date Jungkook, cause he already became an important person to me.
I subconsciously started insisting Hybe to add their securities for some reason, I don't feel safe seeing him in and out of the country for three weeks. He probably arrived from Hong Kong right now.
And I'm so glad he wasn't visiting me and giving me an ounce of time, cause with that I could just continue this two months smoothly to make it not too obvious that I went away that fast just because I rejected him.
I feel like he's already moving on, and wasn't really serious about me. Although it's hurting me, it's for the best for both of us not to continue whatever we started.
I was lost in my thoughts, that it took me a second to finally realize that I arrived on the foot stairs of the building. I ascended the stairs in silence going up to the third floor of the apartment complex.
And as soon as I arrived on the third floor, I saw a figure of a man that I had missed for three weeks standing next to my door with a sunflower bouquet in his hand.
Even with that mask and beanie covering most of his face with just his serious eyes gazing on me, I knew who he was. And I never felt so scared and so overwhelmed all of my life.
"Ju-Jungkook?" I uttered his name.
I knew I wanted to be with him, but I'm too scared.
I knew I can't hide my own feelings anymore, but.
Is he really worth the risk?