this is loosely inspired by "My fiancee is in love with my sister", i wouldn't really recommend those who get annoyed easily to read this since the development is quite slow and the beginning will get on your nerves a lot
He's in love with my sister.
A love that would later cause your death for over six lives.
You're the oldest daughter of a Marquis, (Y/N) Bythesea, a girl with a normal appearance and decent skills, nothing too catchy to look at. You've lived your life studying, whether it's manners or history. Your sister is the opposite of you. A girl with a sick constitute that tends to worry others whether it is intentional or not.
Her name is Sophia Bythesea, a girl whose appearance was so breathtaking yet fragile-looking, making almost anyone feel the need to protect the poor ill girl. Everyone loves her, including you and well, your fiancee.
From when you were a young age, you were promised to Duke Basten as his son's bride. Your father had been best friends with him and was once saved the duke. As a form of gratitude, he offered you, his firstborn as a match for his best friend's firstborn that happened to be a boy. The two closed the deal with a written promise, a piece of paper that bound the two of you together.
During your childhood, you would often come to visit the duke's castle to play together with your fiancee. And although the first impression was rough for the both of you, you two soon figured out your preferences and dislikes. Talking about history until late at night, playing ball together in the garden, or just laying down on the grass to feel the sun's warmth.
It was a magical time for you. Your parents still loved you and your fiancee liked you as well.
But it all turned downhill when your mother got pregnant again with a second child.
Your mother had a hard time having her, she would vomit thrice a day, not a day without nausea, and for the fourth till sixth month, she had to be bedridden due to her body being so weak. Your father was so busy with your mother that he barely looked at you anymore. You who were still six years old didn't want to further distress your parents with your study so you stayed quiet.
Sophia was born prematurely and had to be monitored twenty-four seven. And even after she grew up, her body was still weak and often would get sick. But the child was so bright that she still ran around the garden and laughed while bedridden.
The two of you grew close as years went on, she admired you and highly regarded you as the best sister in the world. How could she not? You took care of her when she was sick, accompanied her to tea parties, trained her manners, and even down to the littlest part such as brushing her hair.
Her bright personality made you love her so much, even if you knew that she was also stealing away your parents' love from you.
They no longer pay you any attention, your grades were left for you to decide, you had to arrange your own debutante, buy your own clothes, hell they even forgot your birthday! And at this period, you were no longer visiting your fiancee since your parents deemed it unnecessary. Instead, they told you to focus on taking care of Sophia since you are her elder sister.
Once, you retaliated and complained about the unfairness you are receiving, but they replied by slapping you in the face, saying, "You are the older sister! You should not be jealous of your little sister! Don't you see how much she's suffering right now? How could you be so ungrateful!"
At that moment, you finally realized that things have really changed. Your parents didn't love you anymore.
But that didn't stop you from loving Sophia. You could never bring yourself to hate her since she is innocent. She is also one of the only people to care about you, besides your personal maid.
One day, your father said to you that your fiancee is coming the next day to visit you. You couldn't hide your smile from showing for the rest of the day. You began to imagine how he looked now. Is he taller than you? Is his interest in history still the same? Will the two of you be able to talk when you meet again? What topics does he like now? You heard he practiced swordsmanship and mastered it by the time he was sixteen. His arms should be muscly now, right? Does he have a six-pack too? You shooked those thoughts away after noticing how indecent it was.
In short, you're happy to be able to meet him again.
When he arrived at your doorstep, you couldn't keep your hand still as it kept on brushing your hair to the back of your ear over and over again. What's his expression going to be when he sees you? Will he be shocked? Happy? Sad?
The door finally opened and in came a tall man with a sturdy build, striding confidently towards you and your family. You saw his expression go from stoic to shock, the only thing is, his eyes weren't directed towards you.
You looked at where he was looking at and tilted your head to the side only to see your sister smiling at you happily without a care. When your eyes met her, she smiled even wider and hugged you. You of course hugged her back but your mind was racing with thoughts, thoughts that were getting wilder by the second.
That was the start of your torture, a never-ending nightmare for you to experience over and over again. His eyes would always catch hers, his smile was kept exclusively for her jokes and acts, his hands were to hug her when she's sad. While you were in the background, watching it all happen silently.
You tried, you tried so hard to approach him again, to make him return to you. But he kept a blind eye to you. It was as if the time you spent together was nothing but a flaw to him. Sophia though kept on trying to get the two of you together. The innocent girl was convinced that the two of you are made for each other and that he is just lost for a bit.
No matter how hard you tried, you could never hate her. A pure bright girl like her was destined for love so beautiful, it was a shame her health became a flaw to it.
When you are out of the picture, you could see how much the two suited each other, a perfect couple living in a painting. That's how beautiful it was. So you kept your distance and even offered your position to your sister. But the paper specifically said the firstborn so you couldn't do anything about it.
Your fiancee though was furious to hear it. You were getting in the way of him marrying his true love. In the end, even after you obediently stepped aside, he killed you. His sword sliced your neck right in the middle as your tear slowly falls, the hurt from the betrayal you experienced was still vivid even after you woke up the next day.
That's right, you woke up again. You returned back to when you were eighteen, where all of it began. On that day, you tried to meet up with the duke first, greeting him at the front door and even leading him towards the garden without introducing him to your sister. But when he saw Sophia in one of the hallways, his eyes were the same as before, so enraptured with her sight.
In your second life, you tried to escape from him earlier, living in a small cottage with a beautiful valley of flowers. But he soon found you and killed you again.
In your third life, you tried to take your own life, but you returned again.
In your fourth life, your love had dried up for him and you tried to poison him then yourself but he found out and killed you.
In your fifth life, you were falsely accused of trying to murder your sister and he had you hanged.
In your sixth life, you tried to negotiate with him but he didn't trust you and killed you.
And now you're in your seventh life, this time you returned way back to when you were three, the age where you first met him. When you first opened your eyes, you couldn't hold in the relief as you cried. Has God finally shown mercy on you?
You kept playing with him for the fun, of course, the child him didn't do anything wrong. But when the last day of your stay came, you said something to him that made the boy widen his eyes,
"I hope we never meet again." Fck you asshole.
And after that, came the pregnancy period. Before you would keep quiet in your room but now you tried to help your mother and father with anything, whether it was bringing medicine to your mother or just singing a melody to the baby in her tummy. In return, the relationship between you and your parents didn't go sour and they still loved you despite Sophia being born.
Your relationship with Sophia remained the same as before, still very close. But now the difference was, you felt more like a sister than as her caretaker. The days went by peacefully, but before your debutante, something came up.
Usually, with debutantes, the girl would at times be escorted by her loved one if she has one or her family. And for you, you came with no one which in turn grew into a major scandal at the time since you were famous for having the title of the Young lord's fiancee. Some even questioned your relationship with your father.
In this life, you were sure you're going to be escorted by your father since your fiancee rarely comes to these types of events. He also didn't bother with sending you any letters to ask how you're doing so you figured he was too busy to even think about you. He may have even forgotten about your existence.
So how could you describe your surprise when you saw his figure standing right at the end of the staircase, looking at you as if you were the most beautiful girl he has ever seen. You had to pinch yourself a few times to make sure everything was indeed real and not a dream. You even asked your sister that was standing by your side if the man that was standing there is in fact your fiancee.
Had this been your first life, you would have run down the stairs and given him your biggest smile with your heart thumping like a maniac. But now, you felt like you were about to puke just by seeing his face. The thought of going to the debutante didn't seem that appealing anymore. Deep down you wanted to reject him there and now, if possible you could slap him and say all the curse words you've been swallowing the entire time.
But unfortunately for you, he is a duke's heir, a man with a higher position than you. If you went as far as to anger him, your life that was running so smoothly would have gone to waste. You've finally received the love you've longed for your entire six lives, this man won't stop you from having it.
So instead you sucked it up and went downstairs to greet the man with the fakest smile you've given to anyone. "I didn't know you were coming as my escort, Leo. Had you told me, I would've coordinated our attires to have matching colors"
Leo chuckled and offered his hand as I took the last step down the stairs. You reluctantly placed your precious hand on top of his as he led you towards the carriage. "Of course I had to come, I am your fiancee after all. You look really beautiful in that dress, (Y/N). I just hope the men would keep their eyes off you or else I would have to... dirty my hand."
Whilst saying those horrid words, he was smiling the entire time with his eyes closed. You felt chills down your spine as you realized just how cruel and blood-thirsty this man is. Let's just hope he won't direct it at you. You kept your smile at him as the carriage carried the two of you towards the venue.
Now that you think about it, he should have seen Sophia back there right?
"So, you've seen my sister?"
You looked at his reaction through your lashes. If you're speaking honestly, you wholeheartedly expect him to have a lovestruck expression. You're six lives proved just how much this man is truly destined to love Sophia. No one, not even God himself could ever separate him from her. When he said he'll love her even in their next lives, he literally meant it.
"Yes. You seem close to her. She kept on glaring at me as if she wanted to tear me apart for taking you away from her."
"Really? Well, you could say that. I've taken care of her since she was little so I guess she grew attached to me. I hope you will forgive her for that. She's just a bright child and a very lovable one at that." Your mind took you back to your previous lives when she would always worry about you even when Leo was restricting her from meeting you. She kept worrying about you and even scolded him multiple times. You still remembered when she screamed for you when you were about to be executed, her eyes were filled with overflowing tears. You unconsciously smile.
After a few minutes of relishing the touching moments, you woke yourself from the beautiful daydream and proceeded to wait for him to ask more about your sister. His interest should be piqued by now.
"I hope you'll smile like that for me as well."
"What?"
"Your smile is really beautiful, (Y/N). It suits you much better than any of the smiles you've given me today."
"I... see."
"How about we have an outing tomorrow? To make up for the lost time."
"U-uh, I'm sorry but tomorrow I have something to do with my sister."
"I see, then what about the day after that?"
"I'm busy as well."
"Is that so. Then I'll visit you three days from now. I expect you to be the one to open the door for me."
You only smiled as a response to hide the lies you've been giving out. This man is so persistent! Just say you want to meet my sister instead of me! You mentally heaved a harsh sigh as you darted your eyes towards the window to see if you're close enough to the castle.
This night will take forever.
As soon as you arrived, the servant quickly announced your arrival to the room resulting in all eyes on you. You knew some of the people here but all of it recalls only bad memories. One of which had been haunting you for the past six lives. Speak of the devil, the girl is heading right towards you with her entourage behind her.
"Hello there, (Y/N). Congratulations on your debut. I see you're accompanied by Leo himself. How thoughtful of you, Leo. You could've asked me since I was in need of a partner as well." She said with a flirty fashion towards your fiancee. Her name is Serena Lansford, the daughter of Duke Lansford. Rumors said that had you not been there, she would've been chosen as Leo's fiancee.
She liked Leo a lot and it resulted in her hating you instead and boy she never tried to hide it. Every party you went would always end with you either drenched in tea or covered in mud. Even after you tried to open her eyes that Leo was in love with your sister, she still remained firm on bullying you for taking what was supposed to be hers. Not once have you ever held a normal conversation with her.
In this life, you were already so tired of her and her antics that you just ignored her. You didn't even bat an eyelash at her and simply walked away with a smile with your hand firmly grasping Leo's arm. Serena was so shocked witnessing your attitude that she marched towards you and grabbed your shoulder harshly. You gasped in pain and Leo who noticed it quickly hit her hand to protect you.
In a blink of an eye, you were already positioned behind him while he shielded you against Serena who was left in shock after being hit by her crush. Leo eyed her with contempt as she tried to reason with him.
"I- Leo, you need to understand, I did it by accide-"
"It's Duke Basten for you, Miss Serena. Do you think I don't have eyes to see how you went after my fiancee? I hope you've learned your lesson and serve this as a warning to anyone who dares to bring any harm to my fiancee." He glared at everyone in the room before walking together with you towards the pastry section.
The ball went silent for a whole minute before the host cued the musicians to start playing again to break the ice. The crowd soon turned alive again but this time they were avoiding the two of you. You on the other hand enjoyed the delicacies with a smile on your face while Leo stood beside you, watching you eat contently.
After greeting a few people and having a few pleasantries, the two of you went back home safely. Before he left though, he stole a forehead kiss from you and ran away, leaving you as a blushing mess as soon as the maids opened the doors.
When he opened his eyes, he realized something wasn't right. His body felt much lighter and his view is shorter than usual. His room was also different from his shared room with Sophia. But he knew where this was. It was his childhood room. To confirm his suspicions, he looked at the mirror and saw a small version of him staring right at him.
He had returned to when he was the age of four.
Nothing significant truly happened this year except for one. The day he met that girl.
(Y/N) Bythesea.
The girl he ruined.
You truly did nothing wrong. The one to blame for your demise was himself. He had driven you towards madness to the point where you took your own life to escape him. He was too blinded by love, a love that was given to the wrong girl.
After you died, Sophia couldn't forgive him and avoided him like a plague. She sent him your diary and all the letters that you never sent since you thought it was too cheesy to send. He read through it, every single page, every single letter. All of your feelings for him were kept there to hide your affection for him.
Your diary was also the one to remind him of your first meeting, a memory he had forgotten way back. You were his first love, and yet he forgot about it after years of harsh training.
The guilt slowly ate him alive, he couldn't focus on anything. Coincidentally, he was sent by the emperor to deal with a rebellion in the south. Before he knew it, a sword had already pierced through his heart as he knelt down feeling numb from the loss of blood. His subordinates yelled for him but he couldn't hear them.
Before he took his last breath, in front of him was you, the little you smiling at him as the two of you read a book about the history of magic. Your cheeks are so rosy and red while your eyes shine, rivaling those of the stars.
"I'm sorry (Y/N)"
And now he's back to where it started. This time, he won't mess up again. He'll cherish you and love you for a whole lifetime and more.
You were still the same as before, still so lovable. Your curiosity and kindness attracted him the most and it still does. The day your fathers introduced the two of you once more, he was smitten for the second time. How could a human being be so pretty? You were only three years old and yet you already look so beautiful.
He couldn't remember what you look like when you were older. He kept on trying to search for anything, a glimpse of your face, but he doesn't remember. His mind had been so occupied with your sister that he barely had any time to spend with you. Regret filled him as he played with you, wishing he had treated you better. You could've been happy with your life but he ruined it all for his own selfish desires.
While the two of you were reading a book about magic, he suddenly took your hand and grasped it tightly, making you wince a little. Seeing a small pain, he quickly loosened his hold but still kept a grip.
"I promise I will never let you be sad (Y/N)! You will be the happiest girl in this world!" Your eyes widened for a bit before laughing it off. "Alright, alright. I'm sure you'll do that. Let's just hope you actually remember that promise of yours."
Hearing your words left him in silence. What did you mean by that? Do you not trust him? But during this age, you were supposed to be in love with him right? Shouldn't you be happier when he promised you those words?
Your reaction kept him awake at night. Perhaps, did return back as well? If that was the case then it would be harder for him to win you back.
He had hurt you so badly, he'd be surprised if you actually wanted him back.
Let's just hope that's not the case.
"I hope we never meet again."
And you left him with his eyes and mouth wide open.
It seems he was right. You had returned back in time as he did. And now you wanted nothing to do with him. As he watches your figure slowly get smaller and smaller, his chest felt pain for the first time. Something was piercing it over and over again, like a sharp needle.
Perhaps it was best for him to let you go.
He was the cause of your pain. If he stays away from you, wouldn't you be happy? You wouldn't have to be reminded of those scarring days with him. He heaved a sigh as he closes his eyes once more. Yeah, it's for the best.
One day, when he was studying swordsmanship at the academy, he received a letter from your father asking him to be your escort for your debutante. It's already your debutante? He didn't attend your previous debutante because he was too busy with studying but now that he knew everything, he could leave it behind and accompany you.
So he replied with a yes.
When he arrived at your estate, he was greeted with warm welcomes from your parents. He remembered they didn't care about you back then but it seemed you had changed them. They told him to wait for you down the stairs as a surprise since they didn't tell you about him.
While he stood silently, anticipation filled him. How will your reaction be when you see him? In this life, he hasn't made any mistake or hurt you in any way. You should be more forgiving with him... right? He hoped you would at least show him a smile or two.
The sound of heels made its way to him as he lifted his head to see you.
Oh boy
He could feel his heart thumping so hard at the sight of you in that dress, it almost jumped out of his chest. His eyes focused on you for the remainder of the night, as if no one else truly matters to him. He feels like a lovesick puppy all over again.
The previous thoughts of having to let you go flew right out of the window. He had to make you his.
Even after you tried asking him about your sister, he brushed it off quickly as if it had nothing to do with him. He knows you are worried about him falling for your sister instead of you, but he'll prove to you that he has changed for the better. He'll cherish you and love you like no other to the point where you won't think about anything but him.
After the debutante, he frequents your mansion to the point where it feels like it's his second home. Your parents love him and would always try to get the two of you to have an alone time together. He is after all the most popular single man currently. With his achievements and lineage, every girl would die to have his hand in marriage. Except for you and your sister.
He took advantage of your parents' goodwill every time while you did the opposite. At first, you were going to ignore him since he should be coming to see your sister, but instead, he came to see you. He surprised you countless times with gifts and presents, even took you out on a date to the nearby town. Despite all that, you still can't make yourself trust him.
You've been through hell and back during your six lives, him showing a little bit of kindness wasn't enough to patch all your wounds. You don't think anything he does could ever mend it back. You told Sophia of your thoughts about him and she suggested that you talked it through with him. Though that led to you shivering out of fear and trauma from your previous life where he immediately slit your throat.
"I'm truly sorry Sir, but my sister is still sick and is seeing no one at the moment. Maybe it would be best if you go home and come another time."
Sophia shows him a sweet smile but he knew better. He has seen her show this smile when having to encounter annoying nobles. It feels odd being on the receiving end.
"But I just saw her taking a walk in the garden with a smile on her face. Can you elaborate on the reason why she's ignoring me? Have I done something wrong?"
"She simply doesn't want to see you right now. Though in my opinion, she's rather annoyed at your advances. Anyone could clearly tell she's very uncomfortable but you keep on pestering her with gifts and presents that she doesn't even like. I suggest you keep your distance from my sister, Sir."
Sophia ended the conversation with her slamming her cup of tea down on the table. She stood up before leaving the room, not before giving him a glare as a warning.
Leo knew she was a sis-con but to think she would go this far... Was his approach wrong? Should he have taken it slow with you? And those gifts, Sophia was the one who said those are your favorites! He sighed in annoyance for having been lied to. He should've known better than to trust her.
Even after getting rejected, he's still as calm as ever because he knew you can't get away from him anyway. Your marriage is in one year and is already planned thoroughly. It's a contract written on paper and signed by both your and his father. No matter how hard you try to get away from him, you won't get far as long as the contract still exists.
"Sophia, what should I do? The date is getting closer but I don't want to marry him at all. I would rather die than having to marry that bastard." You cried as you curled inside the thick blankets. Time passed by so quickly that it was already a week before your marriage. You've succeeded in avoiding him for the last couple of months but now it's inevitable to meet him again.
Dread was slowly eating you alive as each day passes. The thought scared you so much that you had trouble eating and digesting anything, your appetite dwindled down to nothing. You lost so much weight that everyone in the mansion became concerned about you.
Leo on the other hand was having the time of his life. He's been busy picking out the venue, the food, decorations, everything on the wedding had to be perfect. Though at times he would be down since he hasn't seen you in quite some time but after the marriage, he would get to see you as much as he wants without anyone getting in his way.
To ensure your safety, as he says, he stationed his guards around your mansion to make sure you're not hurt. You knew though that he's doing this to make sure you don't escape from the wedding. No matter how much you try to convince your parents, they wouldn't budge about your wedding. Even Sophia tried to reason with them but they still ended the conversation with a flat no.
The night before the wedding had arrived and you couldn't sleep at all. Many things crossed your mind. You've come so far only to be tied down to him. How did this happen? He has never paid attention to you during those six lives, and when you've finally decided to leave him alone, he comes back with full force?
Your mind unconsciously brought you back to your early lives, when you were still utterly in love with Leo. The stupid things you did for love. All of you were meant for him and he shrugged it off as if it was dirt stuck in his eyes. Loving him only reminded you of pain and suffering. The only time you ever feel happy was when the two of you were still little.
You're scared of the fact that what if he suddenly changed again? He has loved Sophia for six lives straight, why not another one? You know he has changed a lot but the chances are still there.
And yet when you wanted to end everything, you feel it wasn't right. You worked so hard to where you are now, alive and very much loved by your family. You were no longer in the shadows of them. So what if he changed? You could just file a divorce, don't you? Sure, divorces are usually met with skeptical eyes from the nobles, but since when have you cared for their opinions? You have your family to back you up. They would never let you suffer.
With this in mind, you drifted off with peace in mind.
The wedding went smoothly without a hitch. You kept silent during the whole process while your now-husband is smiling from head to toe. No one has ever seen him so happy that even his soldiers were getting creeped out.
Regardless, after the event was over it was time for the dreaded... first night.
The maids had already prepared you so splendidly for the awaiting night, some of them even gave you a wink and thumbs up before leaving you alone. The waiting was nerve wrecking, to say the least. Your back was almost wet due to your own sweat.
Just when you thought he was not coming, the door opened wide to reveal the devil himself. He was already in his nightclothes but his face was still bright and pretty much energized. Leo walked at a normal pace towards you with an ever-knowing grin on his face.
"We're finally husband and wife, (Y/N)."
"Y... Yes..."
"It took me so long to finally get to see you again so closely. And yet you were so obedient during our wedding. What made you change your mind so suddenly?" He asked you still with a smile on his face. At this point, you were starting to get scared by the man in front of you. His smile did nothing to hide the monster in him. The monster that ruthlessly killed you six times.
"I... I just... I just thought that even if we were to be married, I could just... d- divorce you if you ever you know... fall in love with another girl."
You've never stuttered in a sentence so much for your whole life. The air in the room drastically went cold as your husband's face grew darker. Did he perhaps change his mind already? Was he about to pull his sword and kill you right there?
You immediately closed your eyes, waiting for the pain that is to come.
A second went by.
A minute came and go.
But nothing came.
Instead of pain, you were enveloped in a warm hug.
"I'm sorry, (Y.N)"
He apologized. You hear his voice shake and noticed that he was crying. He left you speechless.
"I'm sorry for everything I did. I'm sorry for being so blind. I've hurt you so badly. I'm sorry (Y/N)."
That night, the two of you were drowned in your own tears as each of you poured out all your grieves and pain for each other. The next day, your faces left the servants speechless. The two of you had come out with reddened eyes, but at the same time, the atmosphere between you two had also changed for the better.
It would take time for you to personally forgive him and forget those past experiences, but he was willing to wait for you.
And as for Sophia, she was content that the two of you are finally happy together. Seeing her sister finally living with a smile on her face was worth all the pain and suffering she had to go through. She would go through anything and everything to make you happy.
Even if she had to make some sacrifices.
"Did you hear? Duke Lansford's daughter had disappeared last night. Some are saying she was running away with her lover, but many are saying she got kidnapped."
"I've heard of it as well. I wouldn't be surprised if someone did it out of revenge. The lady has been known to be rude and selfish. Weren't you one of her victims as well?"
"Yeah, though at some point, I feel the same as her. We do crazy things for love."
"You're too kind! As for me, I hope she's never found! Good riddance. What about you Sophia, what do you think happened to her?"
Sophia looked surprised when asked about the situation before awkwardly smiling. "Well, I'm sure she gets what she deserves, right? She did so many bad things to you sister!"
She playfully cried to you as you petted her head softly. Unbeknownst to anyone, the bright girl was smirking with darkness swirling in her eyes.
"After all, no one can hurt my sister."
who is the real yandere i wonder :D
and while you're here, i recently wrote another yandere book for characters like genshin, anime, etc! it's more like short stories and headcannons. it's called strawberry. alrite ty for reading, see u in another month.