Two feet - Go fuck Yourself (Slowed n reverb)
I don't about you guys but this song is hell sexy for me. Just hearing it makes me smiling without any reason. :)
##################################################################
Alexa
"I need to talk to you both," I decided to talk to Gabriel and Gabriella about my divorce. I keep this a secret for two days before I decided to speak up.
"Is there anything wrong? You look tired and I can see the bags under your eyes," Gabriella asks with concern. Last two days, I was crying a lot and I know I said to myself that I am not going to cry or waste any more tears for Jared but it does not say as I thought. Before signing the divorce, I was fine but then, it all turns into a total heartbreak, mental breakdown, and feelings of betrayal. It all hits me. Even though I said I am going to be fine and I am happy with all this. I still have a heart and I hide all my emotions in it. I am no longer someone's wife and that's fine but what is not fine is, he got to be happy with his life with that woman while me, thinking about all the memories of us for twelve years. This is the biggest heartbreak and yes, this is much more hurtful than the first one.
Now, I think I am a bit fine. I need to be fine. Two days is enough for me to let it all out all my emotions. No more man is needed in my life.
"Jared and I are not together anymore. Well, we are not legally divorced yet but we already signed the papers, and now, wait for the court's decision..." I said and Gabriella is quite close to Jared so she looks sad with all this but Gabriel, I don't know what is he thinking. "He chose his life and there's no need for us to act as a couple anymore. It's better that way,"
"Mom, I am so proud of you. I really am. You are the strongest woman I've ever met. It's okay, we're here for you and we're okay with all this. I bet Helena and Austin will too. It's okay mom, even though I am a little sad-" Gabriel stops her sister midway.
"There's no need to be sad for him. That scum bag doesn't deserve our mom. He chose his path and I hope he died in a car crash and don't ever get to live anymore. To be honest, I want to kill him with my own hands but I am still thinking about mom's life. Mom, this is for the best. Now, what are you going to do?" I don't know how to react but Gabriel just makes me so proud of him. He turns to be a really mature boy and handles all this in the right way. I think It is because both of them used to be in the same position and they handle it well.
"I want to go to New York and planning to bring all of you," I tell them. It feels like deja vu. I was running away from New York and start a new life in Los Angeles because of my first divorce and now, I am going back to New York because of my second divorce but this time, I'm not going to stay forever there. I need to get away from here for a few weeks or maybe a month. We'll see about that. Being away from the scene where I have been hurting is a must for me. At least in New York, Thea is there. I actually thinking to go somewhere alone to keep my mind away from this but I am thinking about Helena and Austin. They are not used for me to be away for a long period yet. So, bringing them to New York is my best decision now. At least, Gabriel and Gabriella can meet Elijah while we're there. "I don't know for how long but it's better if we all go and you can meet with your dad too. He must be happy to see you both," I said to them.
"Whatever is your decision, we will follow but what about school? We're not on school holidays yet," That's what makes me have a headache too. There can't take too long holidays from school. I don't want them to miss out on their studies.
"I'll talk it to the principal and work it out. We're going for about one or maybe two weeks. I don't want to go there too long because you might miss out on a lot at school. Let's just hope the school will be okay," Finger crossed.
***********************************************************
I send a text to Jared saying, 'I'm bringing the children to New York.' That's all I said. He should know about it even though I hate him. I don't want him to make a report of false kidnapping or something. He is becoming unpredictable now and it's like I don't even recognize him anymore. He is changing to someone that is different from his old self. Hera makes a pretty huge impact on it. I look at the text and he left me on read. Well, I don't even expect him to reply to it. I know he doesn't even care about it.
I am glad I was able to talk to the principal of their schools and at least they can come with me for one week. Even though one week is not enough, I think it is better that we can't get away from here at all. I have lots to do now.
First, I need to find a new assistant which is quite hard since Hera broke the trust I gave her. Maybe I should find someone who already has a family and that way, I know she won't make me look stupid. Let's just hope it will work!
Second, I want to move away from this house. I don't want to stay in this house anymore. My plan is to sell this house and start a new life in a new house. Living in this house makes me remembering all the memories and I don't want that.
Third, I need to explain to Helena and Austin about their dad not going to stay with us anymore. It's hards to explain but I hope they understand.
Our flight is tomorrow in the morning. I start to pack my clothes and other stuff since I still have to pack for Helena and Austin too. Sandy going to be going with us which is super good. At least, she can look after both of them. "You can't bring them with you," Jared said as soon as he open the door.
"What the hell are you doing here? You are not welcome in this house anymore. Get out!" Gabriel shouts at him. He looks furious and if Jared didn't move now, I bet my son will punch him hard. "Are you deaf?!"
"Hey hey, I got this okay? You go to your room and I'll handle this," I said to him.
"Are you sure? Because I want to-"
"Yes, I am sure. Now, go to your room," With that, he walks to his room slamming the door hard to show that he is mad. "Now, what do you want?" I turn my head towards Jared.
"The text," Of course it is because of the text. "You are not going anywhere with my children. You hear me?"
"They are my children," I said to him.
"I said you can't bring Helena and Austin with you to whatever you wanted to go. If you want to go, just go alone or with your children. You are not bringing my children anywhere," Oh now, he wants to play hard huh? He talked like he is the one who carried both of them in his womb. Act like he is the most responsible dad in the whole world.
"I don't want to hear any of your nonsense. If I want to bring them, I will bring them. Don't make like you can take care of them here. You used to be a good dad to them but now, look at you. Do you expect Helena and Austin to live with you and Hera in that small apartment? I won't trust Hera to be with them anymore. So, shut your mouth and get out," I said to him and continue to pack my clothes. He didn't move an inch from where he is standing. "Anything else?" I ask him.
"Don't make it complicated, Alexa. I came here not to have an argument with you over this stupid little thing. Also, can you stop mentioning Hera in every conversation we have? She got nothing to do with this matter right now. This is our problem and only you and I involve in this. Hera does not involve in this at all. All I am saying, Helena and Austin are too young to understand everything. You get mad at me. Okay, I understand that but please don't use them to get back at me," He is talking like he has no brain. Defending his so-called girlfriend like he is proud of her now. I know what they are planning. I guess my institution is right that they want to take Helena and Austin and make them stay with them. I don't think it is a good idea since Hera is now pregnant, I don't want them to feel neglect when the baby is here.
"You will have another baby soon. I think you should just focus on that for now. I don't think you both are capable to take care of another two additional people in your house. Hera is jobless and you look like you are going to get fired soon. So, think wisely before making any decision. Even if I let you have them while I am gone, tell me where are they going to sleep? On the floor? Your apartment only has one bedroom and one bed," I said to him. I think doctors are paid quite well but I don't know why Jared looks like a mess after we got a divorce.
"I can buy a new house and if you think I don't have money for that, you wrong. I have money and I can make them comfortable. If you want, I can purchase any house and buy all the furniture right away,"
"We just going for a week. I think you are fine with that since you used to be away quite long before. So, what's the deal now?"
"Alexa, I know why you want to go there. You want to meet with your ex-husband right? You want to go back to him and you want to f-" I slap him. How dare he said that.
"Don't talk to me like that! You have no right to say that. I've been talking to you with a patient but you cross the line! Don't talk like you didn't do worst! Remember, you cheated behind me for almost five years! Remember that! You are nothing but a man with no dignity and no self-respect. You know my past! You know it all but you decided to do this to me! NOW GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! I will bring them with me no matter what! GET OUT!!" He didn't say anything and walk out. The tears coming out and the pain is hitting me. Me going to New York is not because I want to meet with Elijah but I need Thea with me.
If Elijah is there, I can't do anything with it. He is married and already happy with his life.
Why would I go back to him after all?
There's no way I do that!
_____________________________________________________________________________
New York, here she comes! Hehe
don't forget to vote and leave the comments!
xoxo