Ari POV
Have you ever felt empty? Like you not sad but you're far from happy. That's exactly how I feel.
"I'm so glad it's about to get cool outside" Santana say
"Me too. I'm ready to wear my boots" Tae say
"And get some long hair" Miracle say
Someone walked in causing me to look up. Fucking Kelsey. I forgot about this bitch
"I just came to see how everyone's doing" Kelsey smile "and I heard about Young" I rolled my eye
"Bye Kelsey" I say
"Oh it's still raw. I'm sorry. Don't be depressed dick ain't that good you dodged a bullet honestly" Kelsey say
"Bye Kelsey" I repeat standing up. It honestly doesn't surprise me. How does she even know we had a past? Bitch wasn't in the shop when we became official
"You want to fight about dick" Kelsey ask "we better than that"
"Oh I'll get a bitch fighting about dick" Santana laugh
"And what does that mean" Kelsey ask
"You know why your car got financed" Santana ask
"Fuck you talking about" Kelsey ask
"Because a bitch wanted a trip" Santana say "I'm telling ya! Pussy so good I got that nigga selling his babymama car"
Kelsey rolled her eyes "you a fucking lie. My nigga not gay"
One thing about Santana he not lying about who he fucking he gone let you know. In details "oh baby you know I got receipts. Let me think your rent was late because I wanted a Rick Owens bag, your baby didn't get school supplies because I wanted my nails done, and you cried yourself to sleep last night because I wanted to cuddle"
"Not the baby school supplies" Miracle laugh
"Oh you picking them?" Kelsey say
"Picking? We all family" Miracle say "just a little fight we gone work through"
Poor Miracle because I'm done with Kelsey. Bitch might as well be dead.
"Agreed" Tae say
"Fuck y'all" Kelsey say
"Well another night you're going to be a miserable bitch because I think Imma be in a mood to go shopping with your food stamp card" wow. Santana was handling her without even touching her
"Santana you making shit up" You could tell it was bothering Kelsey. I mean if a nigga telling me my nigga gay in a shop full it'll get to me too
"Okay your pin is 0671 and you get them on the 12th of every month, your kitchen is dirty, and I heard that head it trash" oh my God "and let me tell y'all good pussy don't keep a nigga at home. You got to have good head. I'm telling ya" That's a fucking lie. You can have both and they still choosing the babymama
"Ariana" she look at me like I was annoying her. First off I didn't even say anything.
"Kelsey just leave" I say
"I can't for Young to get out! I swear I can't" I just started fighting her. I'm just so tired of everyone blaming me, disrespecting me, and taking my niceness for granted. That shit is old.
Tae pulled me back and I rolled my eyes at him. I'm fucking over him as well.
I walked to my office and grabbed my keys and phone. It's like I can't get any peace anywhere. It's always some shit
I got in my car and pulled right off. I didn't want to go home because Madison is there, the shop is full of aggravating bitches, and I don't know where else I could go.
My phone started ringing and I looked down. Kayleigh? She must want her hair done or giving me an update on Kay. I answered "hello"
"Hey. Katorah is here" Kayleigh say
"Ari" my stomach fluttered. I really hope I don't throw up
"Kay" I say
"I'm guessing you didn't get it" Kay ask
"I didn't" I say "and I know how you feel. It'll be gone don't worry"
"I was thinking. I want you to have my baby" Kay say "if you don't mind"
"Why" I ask
"Fuck you mean why" Kay ask
"Why should I keep this baby" I ask
"Ari I feel some way about you" Kay say
"What way" I say
"I don't know. I want you to keep it" Kay say
"You have a ten year sentence" I say
"I might take a plea eight years" Kay say
I rolled my eyes "so, what the fuck my child is going to know your voice and see you in eight years"
"No maybe like five. Good behavior" Kay say "I got hope" and I don't know why
"Hell no man" I say "that's selfish"
"Tell me you don't want that baby and I'll never bring it up again" Kay say "you abort it and we forget all about it"
Where is this coming from? She was just team abortion and now she wants me to have it because she feel a way about me
The night before she got arrested was nice. I felt secured. I really did enjoy it. I thought about it. A happy little family. My family
Too good to be true. I like Kay. No matter how much I try to hate the bitch I can't. I don't know what it is "Katorah you are in prison. It's not a few months thing you have years man. Ten years"
"You didn't say it" Kay say
It's not that hard. I've been saying it since I found out "I don't want it"
"Abort it then" Kay say "any papers you need signed give em here or I can get Dominique to sign them"
"Are you upset" I ask
"No. I already told you" Kay say "my full support"
"Thank you for understanding" I say. Whether she understood or not it's just not happening
"Fasho" Kay say "I gotta ask"
"What" I heard a noise
"Can you hear me" Kay ask but it sounded muffled
"Kinda" I say
"Fuck! That's time. I love you Kayleigh" Kay say
"I love you too" I forgot she was there. I smiled. Ive never heard her say that. Although it wasn't towards me I liked the fact she made sure she told her before the call disconnected. Now she knows about this thing. Too many people was finding out about this pregnancy. It was a loud annoying sound "Ari are you there"
"Yeah" I say
"I'm sorry" Kayleigh say "sometimes we get Bryce and you can come to the house. If you want"
I smiled "thank you Kayleigh. That offer means a lot to me" I don't want to be the reason Jada stop letting them see him. I don't want her to pop up and shit go left. Unfortunately I'll have to keep my distance
"Okay I'll call you when she calls again" Kayleigh say
"Okay" and I hung up. I don't know what to do. It's like everything has came crashing down at once. My phone started ringing. Now here this nigga go "hello"
"You don't live in the apartment anymore" Trent ask
"Who told you that" I ask
"I'm here waiting for you" Trent say
"Why" I ask
He started laughing "what do you mean why? I thought we were cool"
"I mean like, why are you in Atlanta thought nothing was here for you" I say
"I want to see you" Trent say
My stomach did the uneasy feeling it's been doing and I pulled over. I placed the phone on mute and leaned over and emptied my guts. This shit is getting real old.
"Hello" I could hear him yelling
I got up and unmuted the phone "Trent I'm going to send you my new address" he's a male. I can definitely use his signature
"Okay" Trent say and I hung up
I sent the address and continued driving. Once I got there the first thing I did was brush my teeth
Trent: park anywhere?
Me: as long it's not a number on the parking spot it's okay to park
I went ahead and grabbed my keys and headed downstairs. Once I got to the lobby it didn't take me long to spot him. I watched his walk as he approached me "I miss you"
"I miss you too" I smile and when he went to kiss me I turned my head
"We don't greet each other like that anymore" Trent ask
"Let's go upstairs" I say walking off
Once we got up to my place he was smiling "damn I'm proud of you"
"Thank you" I smile. I'm proud of myself.
"Wassup you curved my ass downstairs" Trent say
"I just don't want to kiss, fuck, suck, or anything else. I'm on a much needed break" I say
"Imagine fucking so much you need a break" he laugh
I don't think I did it a lot. Well for one I was in a relationship. When you are in a relationship right it's your job to please your partner?
It's not fault the bitch popped percs and always had a hard dick
"Imagine being in my business" I say
"I was just joking" Trent sit on the couch "you on yo period"
I wish I was. I'm telling you if I was to start my period I'll be so damn happy.
I sat next to him keeping a great distance "I'm um I'm well" my dumb ass couldn't even say it "I- Trent"
"Come on Ari. I'm by yours side forever. You my girl" yeah we gone see after this
Just to throw it out there when Trent calls me his girl it's not him saying we together. He's calling me his girl like he always got my back. Basically in a friendly way. He's my forever and always friend.
"I'm pregnant" I say playing with my hands. I could not look at him.
"Yes! Yes" Trent get up "I'm so glad I didn't use a condom. This is amazing Ari. Our baby gone have a perfect life"
I have a choice. Trent can take care of my baby. It could just be a secret I can keep. He's been wanting a baby with me and we can do this
Until my baby comes out with freckles. I can't do him like that "it's not your baby"
"Huh" Trent ask sitting on the table in front of me. No house manners.
"I'm not pregnant by you" I say wiping the tear. This is why I have to get an abortion. All this damn crying is for the birds
"So you let another nigga get you pregnant" Trent yell standing up "after everything we've been through? Ari you just dumb. Kyle would slap your ass if he was alive" and he walked out
Just fuck everybody at this point.
Trent is upset and if we're being honest I don't want his baby or Kay's. He just started taking care of his kids. I'm done with him.
Tae done pissed me off. The reason Kay even knew about the pregnancy is because he thought it was okay to pillow talk my business with Dominique punk ass. I'm almost certain that I would not have told Kay.
Kay is just a bitch and she been a bitch. Her getting arrested surprised the fuck out of me. I was really looking forward to seeing if she was going to change. Probably not. She was just saying it because it sound good.
I don't know what to do. I cut people off then I'm wrong but if I keep them around I'm dumb.
Maybe shit will be better. I mean Kay is locked up and I'm not holding her down. Not putting my money on no damn books. Trent is mad about a baby I don't even want.
I opened up Facebook. When everything is bad just open social media for a good laugh. That rhymes. I smiled. The first post that came up made me laugh. Facebook really shady because bitch how you know. The post read 'when a nigga says he has a babymama but they're not cool they just live together for the kids, just tell him to shut up and run'
Nah if a nigga got a babymama just run.
I walked upstairs and to my room. I stripped out of my clothes and turned the shower water on. I looked at my body in the mirror. "Ooh bitch you fine but you did fuck up" I be having to look at myself and tell myself the truth sometimes "that's okay though because I know you had good intentions" and I did. Making everybody happy is not my job. I just have to focus on Ariana and I'll okay "but letting that bitch nut in you? Over and over? Yeah bitch you played yourself"and I did. No condoms or birth control? Definitely playing with fire
I stepped into the shower. So, what is next?
I'm starting to believe this abortion is not happening. Nobody is supporting my decision. I don't really like that.
Young POV
I looked at the calendar on the wall. I really just wish I could fast forward because I don't want to be here. This shit is just mad whack
"Marrero I'm shopping you to a men's prison" that was what I feared the most. I ain't finna cap with a mouth like mine they finna be whooping my ass
"Woah you getting beside yourself" I say "my birth certificate say female my nigga"
"And you can get women pregnant. I'm not risking that in my prison" I rolled my eyes
"Well let me go home" I say making him laugh
"You have two options" he was an old Italian. Know he finna give me a fucked up ass choice "one you tell me what I need to know to clean up the streets or I'm sending you to a men's prison"
Like I said a fucked up ass choice.
"Clean the streets up you just need to get all the trash up. I'll even go that community service? That's an option" I ask
"You have ten years" He say "are you willingly to choose someone else's life over yours"
"I ain't no fucking snitch" I say
"Do you know how men prison is? Them guys will eat you alive. You pretty in the face and some of them have life and haven't saw anything feminine like you" he say "trust me you don't want that"
"Can I have like an option C because that's some bullshit" I know damn well I wouldn't survive "you really setting me up"
"No you setting yourself up. People like you come in here all the time trying to keep your mouth close and let me tell you the streets don't love you. You in here and they free. Your son? He's going to be fourteen when you come out and that's just if you don't get time added. With your smart ass mouth I'm sure this ten year sentence is going to turn into life" he was pissing me off
"Don't talk about my son. Yo bitch ass don't know shit" I say
He laughed "you have a week and I'm shipping you off. Get out my face"
"This not even your fucking country and you trynna tell me what to do. Immigrant ass bitch" I stand to my feet
"I'm the wrong enemy you want to make" he say
"Bitch fuck you. Looking like the off brand godfather. Fat obese ass bitch" I say "hope you fucking die eating spaghetti"
He started laughing. "So racist" I shrugged my shoulders and walked out
I walked back to my cell. I got to get out this bitch. My cellmate walked in "How did your conference go? Your lawyer gone get you out of here"
"How the fuck you know about my conference" I ask
"Everybody know everything in here" she say "these walls talk"
They got me in here with a crazy bitch. Hoe talking about talking walls "I'm not gone lie I wish you would just shut the fuck up"
She started laughing "okay"
Yeah okay bitch. "Out of cells" this guard yelled. I heard her voice coming closer and closer. I still didn't move "Marrero get up and get out"
"Nah I ain't in the mood" I say
She started laughing "man come on. You don't want no beef" I looked at my cellmate
Bitch probably right. I stood to my feet and followed everybody out to the yard. Some of these bitches are big. He trynna ship my ass to a men's prison and he need to ship them. Just big as fuck
The last time I did time I was seventeen and in Juvenile and they fucking shipped my bitch ass on my eighteen birthday. I was in prison for like three years. I refuse to stay in this bitch too long
I took a seat away from everybody. Ion want no friends.
Man I hope Jada really come see me. I tried adding the five people I know on visitations but the man ain't approve that shit. She not answering my phone calls and I just want to talk to Bryce. I know I fucked up and my son probably gone forget about me but shit ain't much I can do
That's why I have a change of heart. I want Ariana to have the baby. I just know she'll stay in my life if she has it. I hate to say this. I will never tell her this but I think I love her.
I don't know but I want Ariana in my life forever. I know my life on pause for like ten years but that's really not that long.
"Yo" I looked up at this 6'2 ass bitch. Man I swear
"Yo" I say looking at the bitches around her. Not a fight I'm gone win
"I heard something about you" she bite her lip
"Fuck you hear" I ask
She looked at her friends and they walked off. She sat next to me "you got a dick"
"That's false. I don't know who told you that but it's false" I say
"A guard. That did your strip search" she say putting her hand between my legs "it's there"
I moved her hand "sexual harassment, where the fuck is Human Resources" I start laughing
"Tonight in the shower. I want you" she say
"Ion want you. You big as fuck I don't do big girls" I say. I'm not about to fuck no tree. It's just not about to happen. That ain't cute
"I'm going to get it one way or another" she stand up "and ain't nobody gone stop me"
"Bitch I'll kill you" I stand up
"When you mad your accent comes out. I like that" she say
I gagged "you a big bitch" this hoe grabbed my neck and pushed me against the wall.
"It's been six years since I got dick. I see you in the fucking shower" she licked my neck and walked off
I leaned over and threw up. I'm fucking disgusted. I'm gone beat this hoe ass. Big ass dumb bitch.
"You need medic" a guard ask
"Hell yeah" I say
"Aw I'm sorry they close" I looked up at her
"Fuck you ask me for then" I ask
"Just to be nice" she shrug
Why is everybody in here so evil?
"Do you see that big bitch?" I ask
"Johnson? She's nice" she smile
"Nice? That bitch ain't nice" I say
***
They didn't allow me to shower with everybody and as much pussy as I would've seen I was happy. I didn't wanna be in that shower with thirsty ass hoes.
I laid in my bed. Uncomfortable as fuck. This is exactly why I don't want a job that pay taxes because this is straight metal. I wouldn't even let Linda sleep on this hard ass shit
I closed my eyes.
I woke up to something hot being poured on my body. Fucking spaghetti. This Italian bitch smirked at me before walking off.
I wanted to cry. I can't be here no more.
The rest of the night I just sat at the end of the bed pissed off. My lawyer come tomorrow and word to my son if she don't tell me what I want to hear I'm slapping the dog shit out of her.
I watched the sun come up through this small ass window. This is exactly why people kill themselves in this bitch. It's fucking depressing
"Showers" I stood up with everybody else. Last night they made me wait for everybody to get done but This spaghetti gotta go.
"Damn man. I told you to keep your mouth closed. It's only going to get worse from here" my cellmate say And walked out
I waited for a guard to come grabbing my towel and a change of clothes "you have a personal shower" I followed her out and scrunched my face up when we got outside "there you are"
"Bitch do I look like a dog" I say "or a car? This is how you wash a car"
"I'm just doing my job" she shrug
It was a fucking bucket with bubbles and water. I walked towards it and kicked it over "take me back to my room"
"That's your musty ass" she shrug again
Once I got to my cell. I pulled my clothes off. I just changed clothes.
I just paced back and forward for hours waiting for my lawyer. Bitch never came.
I walked to the side to get a phone call. I waited in line "no need. Your privilege has been revoked"
"Who you talking to" I ask
"You" she point "no showers, no meals, no phone calls, and no visitors. I don't know what you did but you done pissed somebody off"
I hope this whole place just burn up. Right now
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