ISABELLA'S POV
After Indiana's first birthday, Ian hasn't bothered to see her. I've been over to the house to drop Indie to him but he's changed the codes to the gates and when I buzz he never answers. Though his cars on the drive and our calendars are still linked so I know he has nothing on.
I was worried about him. Paul had been over to the house a few times to check on him and he just says he's fine and he's sorry and he regrets what he had done. I wanted to forgive him I did. And I love him still, I always will he's my soulmate. But he had a baby with another woman whilst his wife was in the hospital with his sick child. I deserved better than that and so did Indie. She deserved her dad to be there.
Indie and I had moved into our own place, not as nice as our home but it was okay for now. Part of me just wanted to go home and move on from this but I couldn't. I was too hurt. I called Ian to see if he could have Indie whilst I went to my therapy appointment. But he didn't answer. I don't know why I thought it would be any different to the past 3 months.
It's all in the media now. That Ian and I have split and Nikki Reed is pregnant with Somerhalder's baby. The media are really running with it and everyone is dragging Ian on social media. I get it her fucked up big time but there was no need for strangers who are less than perfect themselves to judge him and make him feel worse about it. I knew he was sorry. I knew he felt guilty and bad for what he had done. I don't understand why it's anyone else's business other than Nikki, Ian's and I's. Even my family are staying out of it.
I knocked on Claire's door. "Hi," I say with a smile as she opened the door. "My little Indiana!" She gushed at her niece taking her from me. "Call me if she starts. She's been a little grumpy today." I tell her. Claire pouted. "Is it those teeth hurting your baba?" She asked indie. "I think so... He medications in the bag if she's in pain and so is her lunch." "Okay." "Thank you so much for this." "Anytime... Got nothing better to do." I smile. Elle and James were back at school now so she was at home most of the day alone.
"Mummy loves you." I pecked Indie's cheek before rushing off.
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"Ian? This is important Nikki is in the hospital having your baby!" I say into his answerphone. for his baby mama to be ringing me about the arrival of their child wasn't okay. but childbirth is scary. He should be there for her.
I looked at Indiana in her crib fast asleep. It was 3 in the morning. "Please Ian, show up for her. Go see your baby." I try and sound as encouraging as I could. "Talk to you soon. I hope it all goes okay." I hung up. I left Indiana's room and went into the laundry room. I wouldn't be able to sleep. I'd be too nervous for Nikki and Ian. So I started on mine and indie's washing. Nina texted me asking me if I heard about Nikki. We had a conversation about it before she went back to sleep.
I prayed for Ian's sake that he showed up for Nikki. I really did.
Mr SmoulderHalder
Bodhi Reed somerhalder
8lbs 3oz
Healthy and okay
I'm so glad! I'm sure she's beautiful <3
I put my phone away and went back to the chores that needed doing. If I got it all done before Indie woke up for her breakfast I'd be able to get some woke done today whilst she naps this afternoon. This means I'll be able to go to bed earlier tonight instead of staying up to finish my work. So all-around win.
I got all the housework done before Indie woke up so I laid in my bed for an hour before she woke and I took her down for breakfast. I had the music on, Indie's choice of course, which was Disney music. She loved to dance to it. I loved to see how happy and excited she got when her favourite songs came on.
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It was Christmas day.
I had been messaging Ian for weeks about seeing Indie on Christmas and what he wanted to do. He never replied so on Christmas eve we flew home to England to be with my family. I wasn't depriving Indie of a magical Christmas because her father didn't want to see her.
It's apparent that Ian is not doing so well. Paul said he's drinking a lot. Which worried me. I loved him I didn't want him to be all alone wallowing in his pain. I married him, he's still my husband I wanted to support him but I had to remember he did this to himself. And I had to put Indiana first, she deserved the world on a silver platter after the year she had.
I sent Nikki a Christmas card and a present for Bodhi from Indiana, they are sisters after all. She even sent Indie one. We have to be mature for the girls at the end of the day. I hated Nikki for what she did to me, but Ian did it too. So I put my differences aside for my little girl. I didn't want her growing up in a hostile environment. I wanted it to be loving and inclusive, supportive, Happy. That's all I wanted so I did it for Indie, not for anyone else.
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"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO NINA! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!" The room sang awfully together. Neen's blew out her candles and we all cheered. Ian was here, I was happy to see him. I missed him. I know I probably shouldn't because of what he did but I do. I miss him and my love hadn't gone away.
"Do you want to take Indie to the bounce house?" I asked Ian. I could smell the alcohol on him and I frowned. It's 1 pm, no one had been drinking. Maybe it was from last night? "Don't think that's a good idea." He said. "Dada," Indiana said making grabby hands at him. "You okay Ian?" "I'm not your problem." "You're still my husband." "About that, I was thinking we should put the paperwork through." My breath caught in my throat. "You want a divorce?" "We're not together, what's the point of legally being together." I blinked the tears back, him saying it made it real. I wasn't ready for that step yet.
The love had for him hadn't died, or changed. I still loved him, I guess that's what unconditional love is. Loving someone despite their fuck ups. "I'm not ready yet," I say looking up at him through my eyelashes. I met his eyes in a short gaze before looking away. "Why?" I didn't know why. I didn't want to let go of him completely. "We can talk about this another time," I tell him and he nodded. "You sure you don't want to take her. She's missed you." I tell him. She carries around his photo sometimes, it's cute but also sad. I just wish he'd hold her for a minute, give her a hug. "I've been drinking." "I know... But you wouldn't hurt her... You're her dad." "I was your husband... still managed to hurt you." I wiped a tear away quickly not wanting anyone to see that I was upset. "She needs her dad Ian." "She needs a good Dad... I'd never been that." "You're a good dad Ian. You're a good person you made a mistake." "A pretty big mistake that tanked out marriage and a 10-year relationship." I looked down at my feet. I wanted to tell him we'd work through it but I didn't know if that was true. I didn't know if I could get through the pain of his betrayal. Sometimes I think I can and other times I feel like I'm drowning.
"I take her swimming on Thursday's... would be good if you could be there." I looked at him, needing him to just do something, tell me yes he'll be there. When he began shaking his head. "I'm walking away." "Ian," I called after him, I felt eyes on us. "I'm letting you go. You won't hurt me by letting me go. So I'll do it for you. I don't want to see you. I don't want to see Indie. I don't love you. I don't love her. I don't want you!" He said harshly. "Please don't do this," I said quietly my voice was too shakey to project it. He walked away. I froze and looked around the garden. I felt like I was spinning. I passed Indie to the closest person to me before running after Ian.
"Ian please," I say holding his door open. "I'm so sorry Elle." "I love you." I cried. For a second I thought he would just hold me. Tell me it'll be okay. We'd fix it. I wanted to fix it. I couldn't lose him. He was mine. All I've ever wanted and he made one mistake. I knew he regretted it. I knew he was sorry. I knew that. But his eyes flicked back to dark before pulling the car door shut. "Ian!" I shouted banging on the car window. He had been drinking he shouldn't be driving. "E! Ian." He pulled off.
I rubbed my face frustrated at everything. "Bella?" I turned to look at Nina, she was stood with Paul who was holding Indie. She was visibly upset, crying. "Mama." She mumbled through her tears. I covered my face with my hands took a deep breath. Squished all the emotions down. I took my baby, holding her close to me. "He loves you. He loves you so much, princess. I promise. I promise he loves you." I tell her. He did. He loved her.
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I met with Nikki so Indiana could meet her baby sister. It was awkward. Very awkward but Indiana seemed to have a good time at the zoo. She always did. She also loves babies so she was fascinated by Bodhi. She's the youngest in the TVD family. So she's not around babies all that much but she likes to play with Amelia's baby doll when she's at Kat's
Nikki and I agreed that the girls should get to know each other as they grow. I was glad we were mature enough to move past the bad blood between us for the sake of our children. She even asked for help on sleep training Bodhi. My experiences were different to what hers will be because indie was in the hospital for a large portion of her life. I gave the best advice I could.
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"Indiana!" I called to her as she was pulling all her toys out of the baskets. "No," I told her she gave me a cheeky smile. I raised my eyebrows. She babbled nonsense words at me. "We're leaving... Come on." "No." She told me. I tried my best not to laugh at her sassiness. we were going to JoMo's house for a bbq but Indie had other ideas. I've already had to get her changed twice today. She went into the garden and played in the dirt, and the second time she spilt her water down herself. Though that can't be helped, I'm currently teaching her how to use a cup instead of a bottle but she's not got the hang of it yet. it's kind of cute when she does it, she gets so excited that she is doing it right then she forgets what she's doing and spills it.
"We're going to play with Melia," I tell her. She pouted. "Mama." She said walking over to me. "Yes, princess." "Juice." "Water." I correct her. Nina gave her Juice twice when she was watching her when I went to an audition and since then she keeps asking for it.
We eventually leave for JoMo's and she was happy to be there when she got there. Of course, I didn't get to relax whilst we were there Jo doesn't have a pool safety gate so Indie was running around the garden and I was anxious she'd fall in so I pretty much chased after her and the other kids for the enter time but it was good to be with everyone again.
I got an hour to myself when Indiana fell asleep at nap time, but Darcy and Holly sat on my lap the whole time talking my ear off about their school performances. I didn't mind all too much. I didn't get to spend as much time with them anymore. Because they're in school and I have Indie.