I sat quietly at the very back of the airplane as people chattered among themselves all around me. My phone was turned off since the fight happened, which was yesterday. Afterward, I gathered my things and ran off to the nearest hotel, where I booked a flight home immediately. The nearest flight was this morning, so here I am- Drugged up and emotionless, with a billion thoughts in my stupid head.
I didn't speak to anyone since the fight happened and I wasn't even planning on it. Grayson would see that I bought a ticket home through my credit card, anyway. But by the time they'll get home, I'll be long gone from their lives.
That was my plan.
I knew that I had to leave everything and everyone behind. The realization that I needed a fresh start, hit me out of nowhere last night. So I started planning, scheming...anything really. Eventually, it seemed I had come up with a perfect solution- flee the scene. I would disappear from everyone's lives as if I was never there in the first place. If everything went according to my plan, I would finally get my life together and if they want me back, I'll be back. But for now, I had to go. It was obvious that I was poisoning not only my own life but also theirs and Hunter's. It had to stop, as soon as possible.
"Ma'am, would you like some champagne?" The flight attendant asked sweetly. holding onto a tray full of drinks and snacks. My eyes scanned over the tray, looking for something closer to my liking. Ah, there it is!
"I'll have some Vodka"
***
I stared at my packed bags, holding back a heavy breath of air that was trapped in my lungs. No crying, Scar. Get it together, you have a flight in two hours. Picking up the bags, I huffed from the weight of them in my unprepared arms. I guess traveling through Europe will be harder than I thought if I'll be carrying so much crap around.
And then it hit me.
I don't need any of this shit.
Dropping the bags to the ground, I stared at them in deep thought. What use would these be to me? All these branded, overly-expensive designer clothes...were just painful reminders of my previous life. I was planning to change completely, become a whole new person. I was planning a brand new life and I was sure I would achieve it. So, these clothes...they're useless to me. I was starting fresh- a new life, a new me, a new environment...with new people. So why was I dragging all this pointless crap into it?
Smiling to myself, I carried the bags downstairs to Grayson's and Bethany's fireplace. I threw the clothes in, watching them turn to nothing but expensive flames. It felt good. It felt like I was letting everything go. The whole plan was finally starting to feel real.
An idea popped into my head and I went with it, grabbing the packaged pills from my pocket. Eyes dancing between the illegal substance and the fire, I tried to think my wild idea through. This is the right thing to do, right? If I'm starting fresh, this shit needs to go too, right? I hesitated for a moment, doubt taking over my spontaneous plan. The problem was that I knew it would be hard to quit cold turkey. I knew I would have to go through literal hell, entirely on my own...in a foreign country. But I did it anyway. I threw the small packages into the fireplace and watched as they disappeared from my life, mentally let go of my history with them. I was done with everything. I was actually done with all of this shit.
Scarlett Harper? No idea. I only know Scar. Or, you know, Scary. She's badass too, I think.
***
My fingers were tingling with excitement as I went through security. Then two men raised their eyebrows at my strange smile. ''You alright, Ma'am?'' One of them asked as he checked my only small backpack, containing only the essentials for my new life.
''Fantastic!'' I gushed, holding back a laugh as he stared in shock. ''Sorry, I'm just very happy right now'' I waved him off, chuckling to myself. The thought of looking like an absolute nutjob in the middle of security made me want to laugh out loud.
''Okay, well, you're good to go'' He shook his head, smiling slightly.
''Thank you, Sir. Have a good day!'' I grinned. Gladly, I took my backpack from him and wandered off in the direction of the plane. I was already trying to come up with ways I could calm my nerves during the flight. Pills were gone, alcohol was gone, Hunter...was now gone too. How was I going to handle this long-ass flight on my own?
''I think...'' A girl's voice interrupted my thoughts as I walked down the aisle, struggling to push through people who were trying to get into their seats. The girl's eyes were searching the seats in an agitated manner. ''God, I don't even know what to think! Where the hell is my seat?!'' She exclaimed, making everyone whisper around her. She was causing a scene, but I didn't feel an urge to judge her. So I laughed, making her head snap my way. ''What are you laughing about?'' She raised an eyebrow, before scanning my appearance briefly.
''Here, show me your ticket'' I finally made it to her, chuckling at her defensive stance. The ticket was shoved into the palm of my hand and I quickly searched it for the familiar seating coordinates. ''46A'' I said, amused by her surprised expression. ''Howdy, Neighbor!'' I grinned.
''What?'' She asked, dumbfounded.
''Mine's 46B'' I elaborated.
''Oh!'' She exclaimed loudly, catching on finally. ''Thank God! I'm glad I get a normal person to sit next to, honestly. Because let me tell you, I'm literally terrified of flying and I was so paranoid I'd get some snobby, Judge-Judy sitting next to me! Like, ugh, hell no! I would literally deck her in the face, honestly. And the World would be one shitty-show short!'' She ranted carelessly as everyone around us stared at her with judgment.
''I'm terrified of flying too'' I chuckled as I searched the aisle four our number.
She stood beside me, not helping at all, as her fingers tapped away on her phone. ''Oh, no shit?! What a coincidence, right? Hey, do you have an Instagram? I'll add you, you're cool'' She blabbered as I found our seats.
''Em, no, not anymore'' I grimaced, remembering how I deleted all my social media accounts and changed my phone number only yesterday.
''What?!'' She gasped loudly, making an elderly couple mutter profanities behind our seats. Flipping her long hair behind her back, she flipped them off discreetly. ''Why'd you delete it? Are you doing one of those social media detoxes? I heard they're like, really cool. But I don't know if I could ever, like, go through with it, you know?''
I plopped down in my seat by the window, dreading to look outside and focus on any part of the plane. Deep breaths, Scar. ''No, not really. I just...wanted to start fresh'' I shrugged, turning my attention to the bubbly blonde by my side. Well, this flight is definitely not going to be boring.
''Oh, that's cool!'' She nodded enthusiastically as her long, hot-pink nails tapped away on her phone. ''Is that why you're going to Germany?'' She asked, finally looking up from her phone. ''Sorry, I just need to answer some questions on my website! I can't keep people waiting, you know?'' She excused herself, smiling brightly.
''Yeah, I'm thinking Germany first...then I'll probably head to Spain or France, and then I'll see where my heart takes me'' I sighed, thinking about my plan. I was going to travel through Europe for a few years before going back to the US. Then, I would start a business of my own with the fund my parents left me.
''Listen,'' Her eyes scanned me with interest. ''I can't believe I met you! Girl, I've literally been looking for an ambassador. Nobody is up for it because every, like, 4 months you have to move to a new country...''
I stared at her, shocked. ''Okay, this is weird'' I joked, making her laugh too. How did I come across her? How the hell is this so convenient? Is this a prank?!
''No, but, are you up for it?'' She was practically jumping off her seat with excitement. ''I can explain more! Of course, how can you agree if you don't know what it is that I do? Ugh, sometimes I'm such a dumb bitch. Sorry! Okay, so...''
I watched as she ranted on and on about her career and her many projects. At first glance, you'd never be able to guess that she was who she was. It was fascinating and most importantly, it was inspiring. Her goals, her determination, her many achievements. She was damn Boss Bitch.
''Wow,'' I let out a breath. ''That's incredible!''
''Oh, stop it, you!'' She waved me off, before pulling out some papers from her bag. ''Here, sign these!'' She gave me a pen, smiling brightly.
My eyes read over the information on the documents, stating that I was going to become an official ambassador of ''World's Youth Support'', a charity that helped children, teenagers, and young adults all over the world achieve their goals and succeed in life, no matter what their life story was or the number of mistakes they've made. I smiled down at my signature on the bottom of the page. ''This is great, really. I can't wait to see it all happen'' I whispered as my hands found their way to a brochure with all the success stories.
''You'll love it!'' She nudged me, smiling at the brochure too. ''You can call me Viv, by the way''
''And you can call me Scar'' I mumbled happily, still engrossed with the brochure. All the young people in the pictures were delighted with their current lives, explaining how the charity helped them start a new life. I desperately wanted to help people. I wanted to make sure that no one ever got themselves into a situation as I did. ''So when are we starting?'' I asked Viv, eagerly.
''Well, I have a conference in the morning. I think I'll introduce you to all the details tonight if you don't mind. That way, you'll be ready to attend the conference with me'' She explained as she searched her phone for something. ''I just need to find my assistant's number, hold on''
''A conference? What if I mess up or something?'' I was nervous.
''No, bitch, you won't. I can see the fire in you, even though it's hidden now for some reason. It's quite like the one I see in myself. Whatever it is that happened to you, you're going to let it all go and become the badass bitch you always were. Alright?'' She spoke confidently as her phone was pressed up to her ear. She winked at me before her assistant picked up and they started discussing tomorrow's conference.
Where did my fire go? She was right. I hid it. So many things had happened, I lost myself in the middle of it all. It was time to find myself again. It was time to be myself again.
''So what did you do, before you decided to start a new life?'' Viv asked me right after she ended her call. ''I can't wait to hear your story!''
I cringed, ''You'd think I have much to tell...but I don't''.
''Lies'' She rolled her eyes, motioning for me to keep going.
''Okay, if you insist'' I laughed, getting comfy in my seat. ''As a teen, I was absolutely unbearable. No, seriously, I feel so sorry for my parents and brother!'' I chuckled as she laughed at my confession. ''I dropped out of college, was admitted to rehab at one point, partied every fucking day, went to therapy for my anger issues, crashed my frickin' Lambo over some girl, refused to get a job, refused to get my shit together...and so on'' I sighed, thinking back to it all. ''And then my parents died...and my whole life was turned upside down...'' I threw my head back slowly, letting it rest against the seat as I gathered my thoughts. ''My brother was forced to take my irresponsible ass in, even though he has a family of his own now and was clearly grieving our parents' death too. But I didn't even think about any of this. I was so focused on myself and my grief, I forgot all about him and his grief. He tried to be everything for me, and I didn't even appreciate it. I feel so shitty now''
''Grief is a crazy thing. You can't blame yourself for not thinking of others while grieving. He's older, I assume, and he has a family to take care of. Obviously, he was going to put his feelings aside to focus on everyone else in his life. You're still young and you don't quite know how to deal with your feelings, I figured. You see, we have so many young people like you in our organization. They get better, trust me. And so will you'' She was suddenly serious, mother-like even. Her previous bubbly, carefree, loud nature was gone. I was fascinated by her professional approach to everything. ''Anyway, keep going. I want to know how you got to this'' She encouraged me, smiling now.
''Well, my brother got me a job...which wasn't exactly his brightest idea. But I'm thankful he did...because that job taught me a lot, honestly'' I nodded at my own words.
''What job?''
''His best friend owns a diner in our hometown'' I pursed my lips into a thin line at the memories of it all. As much as I whined about it, I loved that damn diner. I loved how important I felt there, how I had something to do with my time. Most importantly, I loved how Hunter and I seemed to grow closer each time I worked a shift.
''Oh, wow, you never stop surprising me, Diner Girl!'' Viv was impressed, nodding in approval. ''So what went wrong? Did you fuck your brother's best friend or something?'' She joked.
Only I didn't laugh.
And she stopped laughing as soon as she noticed my serious expression, ''Oh...well, shit''.
''Yep!'' I winced, glancing down at my hands in embarrassment. ''We kind of, em, had some history before all that, though'' I tried to explain, fighting the blush on my cheeks. ''I was helplessly in love with him when I was a teen''
''Oh, this is getting better and better! Keep going'' Viv motioned for a flight attendant to serve her. I waited until she ordered herself some food to continue my embarrassing story. ''Wait, do you want anything? My treat!'' She offered, smiling brightly. After bickering about paying, I finally gave in and ordered myself some food too. ''Now, keep going'' Viv encouraged me again, sipping on her ice-cold water.
''Well, we fucked...a few times'' I pursed my lips into a thin line. ''And recently, he was going to get married but the bitch was pregnant with some other man's child-''
''What?!'' She was confused, gaping at me. Oh, Dear...I never realized how this whole ordeal sounded to other people. So I explained everything regarding Tyler and Brittany, trying to make it as easy to understand as possible. ''Holy shit, you live in a soap opera or something?'' She joked, shaking her head in disbelief.
''Sometimes, I feel like I do, yeah'' I exhaled, my throat dry from all the talking I was doing. She pushed a glass of water into my hand and I groaned, not wanting to keep talking anymore.
''Drink up, Buttercup. I wanna know how it ended!'' She urged me.
***
After telling her how everything ended, I was ready to take a nap. But Viv had other plans for me. ''You know, I think he's your soulmate'' She spoke about Hunter, her tone serious. I shrugged, not sure she was right. How could I leave my soulmate behind, if it were true? ''You'll see. Soulmates always find their way back to each other'' She added with a wink.
''I highly doubt that'' I rolled my eyes, secretly hoping she was right.
''Aren't you just a ray of sunshine!'' She let sarcasm drip from her tone. ''Also, here, I found your friend's interview. People love it, from the looks of it. All the comments are supporting'' She showed me her phone screen, where a video of Tyler sitting in an interview was playing.
I almost gasped as I set my eyes on him.
He looked...free.
''Oh my God...'' I whispered as I watched him talk about his sexuality in front of so many cameras, broadcasting his truth to the world. ''He looks so happy!'' I gushed, my heart was warming at the thought of Tyler finally living his best life. No hiding, no lying, no pain. Only love, and freedom. I was happy for him.
''His sister is a total bitch, by the way'' Viv sighed as the interview came to an end. ''I know her, personally. She was my classmate, a long time ago. And from the looks of it, she hasn't changed one tiny bit. Like, a year ago, we asked her to be a spokesperson for a project involving some well-known CEOs and she literally told us to go to hell''
''Mhm, sounds like her!'' I gritted my teeth at the memory of punching her nasty face.
''I'm so glad you punched her'' Viv laughed, remembering that part. ''Now, every time I have to deal with her I'll just picture you punching her big-ass nose''
I laughed, ''So glad I could be of service to you''.
''Oh, trust me, I'm glad. You're going to do great things in my Charity, I can just feel it. You're perfect for the job!''
And with those words, I allowed a new sense of hope into my mind. Maybe I was going to be useful, after all. Maybe, just maybe, I was going to do a lot of good for the world.