#nowplaying
= do or not - PENTAGON =
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I love dancing.
Nobody knew it, not even my parents, and that's because I never tried to dance in front of anyone. To imagine myself dancing with a group of people...ugh, makes me uneasy.
One day after school, I came across the school's dance club and watched from afar. Music blasted as people on the sidelines cheered excitedly for a group of boys competing in a random dance play. There was where I spotted Myungho, perfectly blending among the crew as he grooved and break danced to the hip-hop music. His moves were light and fluid... and for the first time, he looked really cool. The crew took turns free styling to the songs that played, and I was so envious of their talent and courage to dance in an open space.
It is the dream to be like them. To dance however I want without the fear of being judged... but dreams are called dreams for a reason. It happens only when we're asleep at night.
But I couldn't fall asleep that night.
Many thoughts clouded my mind and made me wonder if there was really nothing I could do to learn dancing, or at least try. If only I could dance as well as him... if only someone this good at dancing could teach me for free... if only I knew someone who would do that for me...
The longer I pondered as I replay the memory of Myungho dancing, the clearer my answer became. No matter how I saw it, Myungho fit perfectly as the solution.
...
"I'll do it," I told Myungho. "The tutor thing."
A smile crept up his face. "R-Really?"
"On one condition... Teach me how to dance." I said. It's the craziest thing I've asked for, but I was wide awake (maybe with a rush of adrenaline) when I made that bold proposal. I came to this decision knowing that it might be my only chance to learn dancing from someone who needed me as much.
My stomach tied in knots and my hands trembled so I hid them behind me as I waited for his answer in the unsettling silence. He eyed me in seriousness for seconds and... laughed. I took a small step back, immediately regretting my decision. I didn't muster up my courage to tell him this and get laughed at.
"What's the occasion? Why do you want to learn how to dance? Is it for... someone special?" He teased and eyed me suspiciously. That made me think twice again.
As much as I want to learn dancing, this doesn't seem right. I sighed heavily and turned my back to leave, already hopeless. "Forget that I asked."
"Let's do it," Myungho caught my hand. The playfulness in his voice had disappeared. "You teach me and I teach you, that sounds fair."
I spun around meeting his eyes again and deliberated. I gave it up just a second ago... If I agreed now does that make me look too easy?
Just reject him.
"Okay," it left my mouth. I'm puzzled at myself.
His eyes lit up. "So deal?"
"Deal," I blinked, trying my best to maintain a poker face. All I wanted to do then was break out of this long conversation and get back to my seat.
I looked down to see Myungho still holding onto my hand. "Oh sorry," he released my hand when he realised it too.
As soon as I got back to my seat, he turned behind to face me again. "If you could borrow a practice room at M&K some time, that would be great. Try asking your boss if that's possible. I don't mind studying there, you can teach me and I can teach you how to dance between my study breaks." Myungho suggested on a serious note.
In that few seconds he's got everything planned and that impressed me a little. I liked his idea too because that meant we would be killing two birds with one stone. All I had to do was get permission from Daphne.
"Yujin? Jinnie? Yujinnie?" Myungho waved into my face when I forgot to answer him.
"Uh, yeah okay. I'll ask my boss and let you know again," I said, and added a frown right after. "And I told you not to call me that!"
...
His plan worked.
I managed to get permission from Daphne after preparing a mental script on how I could bring up the topic to her. Though I stuttered a lot in front of her, she understood what I asked for and gave me the green light right away. She even left me with the spare keys and said that we were free to use the space as long as the studio was closed for the day and we kept the entire place clean. I promised her so and shared the news with Myungho the next day at school.
"T-Today?" I stuttered with my eyes wide open.
"Yes, let's start today. You've got work after school right? I'll head down to the studio with you." Myungho said, but I wasn't even thinking about starting today or tomorrow. He's always ahead of me in planning. Then he pointed to my head. "And why're you always in a hoodie? You look better without."
I touched the top of my hoodie, feeling glad that I have it. I never had a problem with it so why would he say that?
"None of your business," I frowned.
"I'm just saying," he shrugged his shoulder, looking slightly disappointed but I didn't understand why. I'm just glad our conversation stopped there until it was the end of school.
= School bell ringing =
"Let's go!" Myungho sprung up from his seat excitedly and tossed his bagpack over the shoulder while I packed slowly. I gave him a quick glance, judging him in silence when Seokmin popped in.
"Where?" He asked. He probably thought Myungho was talking to him. "I'm craving some tteokbokki let's get some together~"
I lowered my head and focused on packing. Suddenly I was shoving everything into my bag, praying that Myungho wouldn't mention my name or involve me in their talk.
"Not today bro. I've got plans," Myungho replied him.
"What plan?" Said the curious one.
Before Myungho reveal anything, I quickly zipped up my bag and slipped out of the back door. I was out of the campus in no time and felt a wave of relief in me. At the same time, I questioned myself about what made me anxious. It's not like a conversation would kill me. It's not like I had anything to hide. It was just a deal between Myungho and I, so why can't I be cool about it?
I frowned down to the ground, really hating myself for being like this. But I didn't know how to change.
"Hey!"
I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around to see Myungho slightly panting. "What the hell? We're supposed to leave together."
"I thought you were going to get some tteokbboki," I lied. I didn't know what he told Seokmin but I did trust Myungho to stick to our plan. Guilt sank in. Maybe I should have waited for him...
"I'm a man of my words."
That made me roll my eyes. "Bullshit," I muttered softly, recalling back to the time he said 'really? after what we've been through together?' If he was a man of his words, he wouldn't bring up the snake incident again after promising me that he would forget about it.
"Uh?" Myungho responded after hearing me. I glowered at him before walking off to the bus stop. I have a part-time job to go to and he could follow me or not.
...
I never knew Myungho could be SO talkative.
First I expected us to sit separately in the bus, but he decided to sit beside me even though there were many empty seats elsewhere. The bus ride with him suddenly became a bonding session. I have never engaged in a conversation this long with someone other than my parents, but for most times, it was him talking.
"Can we get to the studio in peace?" I snapped, and Myungho finally sealed his lip in. He was bombing me with questions about my hoodie, my grades, my social life, my hobby... oh my god. I started searching for AirPods in my bag but I couldn't find it.
"What's up?" He peeked closer after hearing me sigh. I wanted music to keep him out.
"My AirPods," I muttered while fumbling through my bag, wondering if I might have lost them.
The last thing I expected was Myungho fitting his earpiece into my left ear, then putting the other one on his right ear. I turned to him and watched as he scrolled through his phone playlist for a song. Soon, music started playing through his earpiece. It only took me seconds to find out that the song was 'Do or Not' by PENTAGON, which got me smiling because it was one of my favorite songs.
"You like it?" He looked up and asked, and I nodded back happily. For the first time, we exchanged genuine smiles with each other.
...
@ M&K studio
I changed into the staff shirt and walked out to the reception where I work.
"Nice shirt," Myungho commented as soon as he saw me. He was already sitting at the couch facing my reception counter and making himself at home.
"What?" I frowned, yet again. I found myself frowning a lot around him, but let's be honest, he sounded like a pervert.
"Nice shirt," he repeated himself. "I swear it's much better than the hoodie you wear."
"What's wrong with my hoodie?" I finally asked, staring at him over the counter. He really seemed to have a problem with it.
"It doesn't show who you are," Myungho answered. He stood up and walked towards me, resting his elbows on the counter. "I can see you better like this. It shows... you." He said while studying me wholesomely.
If not me, I swear that people would think of him as a pervert...
"I don't understand. W-Why would you say that?"
"We're gonna spend a lot of time together. I ought to know you better as a person," he smiled. "I don't like stranger vibes."
I felt my cheeks burn the more he looked at me. I have never maintained eye contact with a guy this long...
"Oh? You're here early! Have you had lunch?" Daphne appeared, walking out of her office. I tore away from Myungho's gaze, nervously rubbing my hands on my lap.
"Yes," I smiled back, but Myungho had to interrupt me.
"No you didn't."
My smile dropped and I whipped my head toward him. Why must he say that in front of Daphne?!
"I-I did! You just didn't know," I forced out a chuckle.
"You're too early for work, honey. I'm not paying you extra hours so go grab lunch with your boyfriend," Daphne said.
"He's not my boyfriend!" I stepped in right away.
"Y-Yeah, we're not... what you think we are," Myungho tried to explain too. He looked awkward for the first time... until he cracked into a chuckle, "she doesn't even want to be my friend."
My eyes went bigger on him. Hoping he knows that whatever he told Daphne is TMI. TMI!!!
"T-That's not true! We're friends. We just started being friends today. Right?" I gave eye signals to Myungho who gave back no reaction. "Right," I agreed for him.
"Sure~ Whatever you say," Daphne giggled and looked between us. "Ahh. How nice to be young and flirting," she said. "Okay bye! I'm heading out for lunch now so look after the studio for me, okay? Call me if anything comes up~"
With respect I sent her to the door and waved goodbye until she was out of sight, before giving my attention to Myungho again. He was leaning against the counter with his arms crossed this time.
"You were totally kissing up to her," he smirked.
I walked past him, rolling my eyes and went back to my chair.
"Why? Do you like her?" He probed, really starting to get on my nerves. "Is that why you want to learn how to dance?"
I sucked in a deep breath. Feeling frustrated but figured that I should answer him so that we could quickly end this conversation.
"Yes, I like her. She accepts me for who I am and she gave me a chance to work here so I'm going to do my best to show her that she made the right decision hiring me."
With his elbows on the counter, Myungho rested his chin on one hand and looked at me. "You're very defensive, you know that right?"
"What? What does that got to do with this?"
"I'm just saying. That's what I think you are. You're trying so hard to be accepted because you're afraid that people wouldn't like you. That's so twisted," Myungho said.
It stung me and I hated how true it was.
"If you're not here to study, get out." I spat bitterly. I didn't want to hear more.
"See? Defensive again. You shut me out every time," he pointed out.
"Get out!" I raised my voice harder.
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