Warning: mild 'smut' scene
"Nothing lasts forever"
➳
Aurora
Sam is being weighed and they've already run tests on both of us to ensure we're both alright. We got to the hospital a few hours ago.
The storm passed 12 hours after my bundle was born so it's currently about 10pm.
"Couldn't you have waited a few more hours to come to the world little one? You had to make mummy suffer without her meds during a terrible storm Sammy" I talk to my son as the nurse hands him back to me. I kiss his cheek.
Atlas is with me right now, the others are in the cafeteria. Uncle A came in a while ago to meet Samuel and he was thrilled. He held Sam for hours and almost cried when it was time for me to feed him.
"Can I?" Attie asks from where he sits on the couch and I smile at him. They're all so in love with their nephew.
"Of course" I say placing a wide awake Sammy in his arms. Samuel coos and moves his arms and legs, he never stops moving unless he's asleep.
Atlas is a natural for this, I know he'll be a great dad one day — well he kind of already is with Eli. I hope their relationship starts growing more and more.
Samuel has dark hair but maybe it'll lighten in the next few weeks...I have the feeling he'll have the Brambello eyes too, it doesn't really matter because he's got the love and affection of everyone and will have it even if he looks like Rodrigo.
His eyes are a light shade of grey as many newborn babies are, his tiny legs are always kicking out like he did on my belly and when he's awake his eyes are wide like saucers.
I haven't slept in 48 hours, I've only eaten some fruit even though I'm dying for burgers. Dad said we'll get some on the way home. Sammy took three naps and I tried to sleep too but nurses constantly came in to check on us.
Sammy is weighing as expected for a premie but thankfully his lungs were well developed and he doesn't have to stay in the NICU. We're so damn lucky he's healthy despite being born earlier than anticipated.
Dad says Atlas and I were born two months earlier, I was way smaller than Attie so even when he was able to leave the NICU I had to stay for a few more weeks.
My heart breaks for my dad, he went through it all alone because Janine wasn't present. At least he had my brothers, young as they were I'm pretty sure they brought great comfort upon him.
A wave of fear courses through me at the thought of someone taking my baby. Now that I'm a mom...I just — how did dad survive?
How did he keep going when I was taken? I feel such pain in my chest just by thinking of my little prince in the hands of cruel people like I was.
"RoRo what's wrong?" Atlas asks coming up beside me and sits on the bed with me.
"What if someone takes him Artie? What if they take my baby?" I say, voice cracking and tears falling. My twin holds me to his chest, careful of he baby between us.
"Shhh, no one will take Sam okay? Dad was completely alone, taking care of three toddlers and two twin newborns when you were taken Rora. It was way easier to take you but with us all protecting Sammy? No one will even dare approach him" he comforts me
I sniff and wipe my tears. He's right, Sam's got five uncles, two grandpas, Zach who can count as an uncle so 6 uncles, a dad and of course — me. We'll all make sure he's safe. We just need to catch Sergei and everything will be just fine.
➳
An hour and some burgers later we're finally home. In the past weeks we've been redecorating Phoenix's and my room, it's now fit for a newborn baby to sleep in there with us and my brothers built a door so it connects with the nursery.
It all looks pretty cute and I'm happy to get Sam settled. We have a co-sleeper attached to the bed for the first months and we'll move Samuel to the crib once he's a little older.
I don't think we'll be moving out of here even if we eventually get married. I love the idea of my kid being surrounded by his uncles and to be honest, I'm not ready to leave the nest just yet.
I may be a mom but I'm still a teenager who's never known what being loved by her family is like.
I want to enjoy it all now that I have it. Phoenix gets the baby out of the car seat as we get to the room. Sammy immediately starts crying, he surprisingly loves the damn car seat.
"We gotta get you all nice and comfy for bed buddy you can't go all crazy on me. I know the car seat is pretty comfortable but I promise you'll love your crib more" Phoenix says as he places Sam on the bed where I set up the things to change his diaper.
It's the first time Nix will do it, I look over to the doorway and find dad and all my brothers waiting and watching. They think Phoenix will fail the 'big mission' and end up covered in shit. Or in baby appropriate language — poo poo.
"You all seriously think I can't do this? Come on I changed Eli's diapers for months and you all probably never have gotten near a diaper in your lives" Nix comments to my brothers raising his brows.
"Eli was bigger when you started changing his diapers and it was easier butthole, he basically put them on himself" Matheo taunts and we all laugh while Phoenix just rolls his eyes.
Sam stopped crying by now and his eyes are just roaming around. He keeps kicking, making it harder for Nix to take the pijamas off to change him. I laugh when his little foot keeps slipping from Phoenix's hand.
"After five kids I still had trouble sometimes Nix, don't worry too much. Specially with Rora, kid screamed her lungs out every time" dad laughs and I giggle thinking of the mini me giving dad trouble.
"Guys I can do it" Phoenix says but it seems like he's trying to convince himself.
A few minutes later he nailed it, I gave him a little assistance but he's got it. I'm sure next time it'll be easier.
I fed little Sammy and he fell asleep right after. I hope he keeps up the habit of sleeping when he has to without too much crying.
"You still in too much pain?" Phoenix asks as he comes into the bathroom while I dry my face. He hugs me from behind and pecks my neck and lips.
"It's a little more bearable now that I took my meds but I feel a little uncomfortable" I say wrinkling my nose and his expression saddens. He hugs me tighter to him and kisses me again.
"I'm sorry baby, if there's anything I can do tell me" he says and I sigh
"I just want control over my own bladder back" I say shaking my head and Phoenix laughs so I swat his hands away and fake glare
"Not funny!" I say struggling to stop my lips form twitching into a smile
"Sure, sure baby. Don't worry though, I'm an expert changing diapers now I'll give you a hand every time" he says and I can't hold it anymore so I smile and he laughs at me.
I kiss him because I just couldn't resist. His laugh pieces me back together. I started the kiss slow but it deepens until little moans escape my mouth.
We have a baby monitor here so I know if Sammy cries. Nix grabs my hips and sits me on the counter. He pulls away and leans into me with his hands bracing on each side of my hips.
"I can't wait to be able to fuck that sweet cunt of yours" he whispers into my ear and starts kissing my neck.
I blush deep scarlet and giggle. We've talked so much about sex when I was pregnant, we had long talks during the night, mostly of me crying and telling Phoenix of the horrors I suffered.
We've talked on how he'll help me heal and teach me that sex can be pleasurable too.
I still remember the first time he made me feel so good I saw stars. We didn't have sex but it's the most intimate I've been with someone and he kept doing it a few more times. I now remember I haven't returned the favor.
A couple of weeks ago...
"What if I never...orgasm again? Am I even capable of it?" I whisper to Phoenix in the dark of our bedroom while laying in bed. The baby must be asleep now since he's not kicking, Phoenix is hugging me from behind.
"We'll work on it baby, together" he says
"Yeah but...what if I'm broken and can't feel anything good — down there?"
"If you're broken I'll make sure to pick up all the pieces and bring them back together even if I have to hold them all with my own hands" he says and I look at him.
"Can...can we uh..try? Yesterday in the shower I tried it myself but I felt nothing" I whisper
"Oh someone's been a naughty girl, and without me" Nix feigns being hurt and I giggle. His expression then turns serious.
"I don't want you to do something you're not ready for just to prove something baby, if we do this I need you to promise you'll tell me to stop if you feel the slightest bit uncomfortable okay?" He says
"Alright" I smile and that's all it takes before Phoenix slowly attacks my neck and face with kisses. He then devours my mouth as his tongue battles mine.
I can feel the hardness of his length on my back and I feel wetness gather in my folds. That hasn't happened in a while.
I'm still on my side with my head tilted enough for Phoenix to have access to my mouth and neck. He trails a hand slowly up my leg until he reaches my waist.
He pulls my shorts down with one hand while he keeps kissing me.
The sole touch of his tongue in my mouth ignites a fire deep inside me, I feel my sex throbbing and aching for him. More. I want more.
I moan into his mouth as his free hand cups my breast and the other slides my panties down.
"So, so beautiful" Phoenix says as he glances down at my pussy. He lays me on my back while he supports himself on his side with his elbow. I blush as he cups me and kisses my mouth again.
"Is this mine?" He asks with the smirk
"Yes" I whisper
"What do you want me to do baby?" He asks as his middle and ring finger start rubbing small, painfully slow circles on my clit. When I don't answer, too focused on the pleasure he stops and I whimper.
"What do you want Aurora?" He whispers and lifts me shirt up, revealing my breasts. He smiles at the sight and takes one of my nipples into his mouth. I moan as I experience a feeling I never knew was possible.
"I want you to touch me" I whisper and breathily moan when he starts moving his fingers again, my hips bucking in desperate need for more friction.
"Like this?" He asks quickening the pace
"M-more" I say and instantly blush. Phoenix just smirks.
"Tell me if it's too much" he says and I nod
He traps my lips in a heated kiss, this time I plunge my tongue into his mouth and he groans.
Too captivated in the kiss I don't even feel when Phoenix stops his fingers. I gasp when he slips a finger into my wet entrance.
The pleasure is instantaneous. Phoenix takes advantage of my mouth slightly opening with a gasp and thrusts his tongue inside at the same time his finger thrusts out and back in.
My hips lift from the bed and I pull back to look into Phoenix's eyes as I feel my release slowly starting to embrace me.
"More" I ask and Phoenix gladly complies
"With pleasure" he says and without a warning he thrusts another finger into me, triggering a deep orgasm within me.
I moan as it hits me like a wave, Nix watches me intensely as I ride his fingers while my body shakes in pure pleasure.
I moan one last time and we both smile at the same time while I pant with the aftershock of my release.
"That...was....wow" I whisper and Phoenix laughs and pecks my lips.
"I'm glad you liked it baby"
I smile and thank the heavens and stars for the angel sent to me.
I would never be able to fully heal all my wounds if it weren't for the cocky man with the boyish smile who's slowly helping me pick up the pieces of my shattered soul and teaching me that I'm strong enough to get myself back together.
Phoenix wipes the tear that fell down my cheek and starts panicking as to why I'm crying.
"Beautiful, what's wrong?" He asks
"I'm happy" I say and smile. I wrap my arms around him in a tight hug.
"Thank you Phoenix" I say
"What are you thanking me for Rora?" He gently asks as he pulls back and strokes my hair
"I wouldn't be able to do this without you, you've taught me so much Nix. You made me realize that I don't need anyone but myself to heal yet you've made sure to lick my wounds and kiss them better. You've stayed up with me night after night when I cried after a nightmare or a memory of everything I went through. Phoenix you taught me that everything takes time, that there's no magical cure that'll make all the nightmares and scars go away but with patience and love, things do get better. I can't even begin to explain to you how thankful I am to whomever sent you to me because I'll be damned if I didn't appreciate how much you've healed. How I've felt a small piece of myself coming back together every minute I'm with you. I love you Phoenix Samuel Thompson and I'll keep loving you for the rest of my life" I finish. Nix has tears in his eyes as he smiles at me and kisses my lips sending butterflies to my belly.
"Oh baby, I'm the one who should be thanking you. My strong, beautiful girl. You've overcome so much, I'm struck speechless every day by your strength. I've learned so, so much with you Rora. I love you so much more than life itself and I promise to cherish, love and support you with every breath I take. You and Sam, you're both my everything and I would trade you for the universe" he says and a small cry leaves me. Phoenix hugs me tightly for a while.
I sniff and wipe my tears, after a few more heated kisses I jump off the counter, but before going back to bed I decide to mess a little with him.
"Oh and Phoenix?"
"Yeah?" He asks as he starts brushing his teeth
"Remember I'll be going down on my knees and putting your dick in my mouth until you cum down my throat very soon" I innocently smile and get out of the bathroom.
Phoenix just stood there, toothpaste running down his gaping mouth as his eyes darkened with desire and I wouldn't have been surprised if he dropped the toothbrush. I'm pretty sure he's still gaping at the empty spot I was standing in.
I scoot on the bed and watch my little prince sleep, he looks so innocent and peaceful. I make a silent promise to keep him safe and never let him feel unloved like I did.
I will shower him in love and teach him how to be strong and independent but to know he'll always have his family to lean on when he needs it.
Phoenix kisses me goodnight and we cuddle to sleep, I set alarms in a low volume to wake up to feed Sammy.
I close my eyes and for the first time in a very long time I dream of my beautiful life, instead of horrible memories that haunt me all night. I have a peaceful sleep...
Well — that is until a high pitched cry wakes me up. Yup, this is my welcome to mom life. Guess my full sleep nights are over and I don't mind one bit.
Okay yeah I kind of do but I'm the happiest I've ever been, I wouldn't trade it for anything.
➳
I'm exhausted. So, so tired. I'm sitting on the rocking chair feeding Samuel while Phoenix gets some more sleep.
It's 6:30am and I slept a total of 2 and a half hours. Phoenix about 4. Sammy woke up almost every hour crying and it took me a while to get him back to sleep.
Phoenix helped a lot, when it wasn't a hunger cry he got up and lulled him back to sleep or changed his diaper but I still couldn't keep sleeping until Sammy did.
I get up and decide to walk around the house so Sam falls back into sleep in case he starts crying Phoenix doesn't wake up.
Everyone's pretty much still resting except for a few maids. I smile at them and they are all enchanted by Sammy when I present him to them.
We chat for a few minutes and I keep walking, it's raining outside so I decide to go watch it on the porch in the backyard. Sam is now asleep on the crook of my neck.
I cover him up with a blanket but when I get to the backyard porch dad is sitting there, coffee in hand.
"Morning dad, why are you awake so early?" I ask and he turns to look at me. A smile immediately taking over his face. I sit on the couch next to him slowly and carefully so Sammy doesn't wake.
"Morning princess, I couldn't sleep" he explains and I nod laying my head on his shoulder as he puts an arm around me.
"I don't know how you did this five times dad, it's my first night and I'm already exhausted" I say and he laughs
"I don't know either. Janine helped a lot with the first three, I barely woke up during the night" he says. I carefully move Sam and pass him to my dad, he stirs a little but relaxes once he feels my dad holding him.
Dad looks at him in such adoration, he smiles and looks at me with a nostalgic expression.
"You were so small, tinier than Sam. I remember wanting to put you in a protection bubble, afraid you might break. Little did I know you would turn out to be the strongest one of us. It was hell to not be able to hold you that first month" he says
"Wow. Smaller than Sammy? He's so tiny I can't imagine a smaller one" I say
"Yeah, when you got out of the NICU you never stopped crying unless you were in my arms. I slept with you on my chest every night. The only way to get you into the crib was if we put you together with Atlas" he says looking towards the ocean with pain in his eyes.
"I admire you you know? Even more than I did before, dad" I say
"Oh yeah? Why's that?" He asks
"You gave me everything the time you had me. I...I don't know how you coped. The sole thought of someone taking Samuel breaks me so much I don't know how you kept going" I say
"I don't think I did Rora, when you were taken I looked for you every single day the first year. I cried every damn night and cursed everything and everyone, you were so small and Janine didn't know you or the care you needed. I was so afraid for your well-being. I guess I just...stopped. The world moved around me but I didn't feel. I had to put on a smile and play with the boys so they didn't feel left out or unloved but I was so broken baby girl. So damn broken" he whispers the last part and I find myself wiping tears from my eyes.
"I guess I know now who I get my strength from. I think everyone's been focused on the pain I've felt all these years but no one's stopped to ask...how does the dad feel? I really can't imagine the pain you felt the last seventeen years dad" I say and sniff. Dad looks at me and kisses my forehead before saying.
"I don't know what I did to deserve such a kind soul for a daughter. You're right no one ever asks the dad, I guess I've felt like I deserve my pain for not being able to protect you but it feels good to finally express what I've felt" he says and I smile at him
"Good thing you have a daughter to talk to and not only hotheaded guys who can't even form a sentence without fighting each other" I say and we laugh
I'm so glad I came out here today. Dad really needed to talk to someone and it's not fair that I'm the only one being taken care of. He deserves so much more.
We talk for a while, he tells me stories of the boys when they were kids and now I can't take the image of a 5 year old Matheo refusing to take the baby pickles out of his ears. Or the 7 year old Alec who pissed his pants every time he encountered a butterfly.
I love my family so damn much. I don't know what I did to get so lucky.
Dad is telling me about the time he tried to teach Quinn how to swim for the first time and ended up with a broken nose from Quinnie's foot when a loud high pitched scream awakes the whole house.
Dad and I get up and into the house, Sam now in my arms.
What I see next makes my blood run cold. One of the maids I talked to earlier is hanging upside down in a room, her throat slashed and a message written with her blood on the wall behind her. It leaves no doubt in my mind it comes from Sergei.
S a m u e l i s n e x t . . .
I ' m c o m i n g f o r y o u.
________