Sunghoon
"Why didnt I know? "
Mom just laughed a little before embracing me.
"He doesn't want you to worry about him. He said, he's older, he should look out after you. When Jungwon got sick, he's so determined to not loose him. And you know what he told me before?
He told me 'Dad, I don't want to be scared anymore. Let me challenge myself. I have been escaping going out my comfort zone because I'm scared if I do, I might loose something but now, I want to do this not only because I want to help Jungwon but also, because I don't want to loose Sunghoon as well.' He wants to be prepared for the worst. He said just in case the worst came, he don't want to loose himself because he don't wanna loose you. That's why he's doing what he could to go all out. I think like me, he doesn't like to regret things"
I smiled at my parents before running back to Jay's room.
This time, I will be your crying shoulder, and that will go on as long as I live.
Opening his door, I saw him already dressed up, maybe for work.
He look at me, shocked probably but before he spoke a word, I ran and hug him as I just cried and cried. Not saying a word.
"I'm sorry. . "
Was the only word that left my mouth as I continue to sob.
I felt him rub my back as a small laugh left him lips.
"What for?"
"I'm sorry . . . I gave you a hard time before. . .I'm sorry you have to be hurt just because I'm such an idiot. . I'm sorry . ."
He released from the embrace as he smiled at me.
"You're a great brother Sunghoon and you deserve a great brother as well"
"But . .. I've been horrible. . you can't even share me your burdens because I'm such a weakling. . . how can I deserve you?"
"Hey . . you have no idea how strong you look to me. Did you think the one year you are in pain, makes you weak? No . . not making a move to fix yourself is weak . . even if it took you a year. . . I'm still proud that you made it this far. . you Sunghoon have no idea how you help me hold on. . . I'm not giving up . . you know why? Because I know if I fall, I still have you. . that's why I always go on. . "
"Won't Jungwon be jealous of me?"
He laughed as he sat on the couch.
"When I saw you on that stage during graduation, you spoke to everyone and I'm so proud of you. I told myself, wow he's finally growing up. . . you always are so afraid of talking in front of people but on that day, you made it"
"That's because I can't let you down. You always got my back and I can't let you down."
"Exactly, I am not always the good brother here."
We both laughed as I hug him again.
Imagine my life without this person, I might not have one.
"BTW . . Jake mentioned something"
I widen my eyes. . .
Is it the k.. . . .
"He told me you went skating with him. He also said you did something that changed him. . he told me he's gonna show me when we meet. ."
I smiled as I remember how Jay still don't know the sound of Jake's laughter again.
"You went ice skating?"
"Yeah. . . Jake found the skates Sunoo got me before. . . I had it sharpened before we went to the ice rink. . I thought I'm gonna freak out but Jake got me there. . "
"And you . . . you have no idea how you are to Jake . .I mean, I've never seen him that happy before. . . I think it's a sign. . "
"For what?"
"For you to do something for someone and this time .. I think you might not notice but . . . Jake. .he's happier now. . honestly, I've never seen him smile that wide but then I did when I saw you two together in the game booth. . Sunghoon, you're actually now growing up. . . it might sadden me that you might not need me anymore but its more happier for me to see you be your own person. . . I'll always be here"
That is so . .. I don't know . . .
When we got out his room, our eyes darted to the room where Jake is in who is currently giggling and laughing as he play with the dogs.
Jay immediately stopped in his tracks as he went closer to make sure he's hearing it right.
"He just started laughing when we're on the ice rink"
Jay without a word enter the room and engulf Jake in a big hug before exclaiming ,
"I've never heard that laughter since forever. . . thank goodness"
Jake laughed before signing and Jay just laugh.
"I'm not overreacting, I'm just happy you know. . . ah . . I'm gonna be late for my shift. . I have to go to work so . . see you when I see you. . oh after you sleep you can visit Jungwon haha "
Jay greeted our mom before we heard him and dad's car drove away.
I look at Jake and he's smiling before gesturing to the bed.
I went there and lay down as he follow.
We fell asleep so fast.
.........................................
We woke up and it's already afternoon so I went to the bathroom to wash up and I saw my phone with Jay's text.
"My work ends at three"
Ok so we have one hour to get ready and go to the hospital.
I woke up the sleeping puppies before waking up Jake as the two dpgs are literally wrapped around him.
"We have to get ready"
He began stretching and I went to the bathroom and did my business before I wash myself.
After we all are ready, me and Jake hop into Jay's car where he drove us to the hospital as our parents went to the company.
"How's he been holding up?"
Jay smiled.
"He's doing better. . at least now, he can eat solid foods unlike before that he has to result to tubal feeding which is terrible. He also loose weight"
When we reached the hospital, Jay walk around as if he's memorized this place and we are face to face now with a door and as it opens, we saw Jungwon and his mom.
"Hi auntie. . . sorry I'm late, I had to pick up my brothers . ."
We bowed to her as a greeting before she smiled.
"It's ok. . . I'm just glad you're here. I really have to go back to work. . . I'm going now sweetie . ."
She kissed Jungwon's forehead before she wave goodbye to us.
Jay placed the food, we got on our way on the table as he approach Jungwon whose eyes are slowly opening.
He examine the room before his eyes landed on Jake and me.
"Hey Jungwon"
He smiled and when Jay said he loose weight, he didn't mean a few pounds. Jungwon is thinner now and his cheekbones are visible. But nonetheless, I still wonder how he still look . . . . pretty. . . I can't imagine how horrible I might look before haha.
"How are you feeling? I brought a little something here. Don't worry Bunny, I am now close to mastering the curry. . it's so simple but complicated"
Jay said making us laugh a bit and Jake instead let out his adorable giggles. I don't know, he could be laughing or what but all I hear is giggling, I should get my ear checked.
One thing that Jay and I have in common would be calling our boyfriends with animal names. Sunoo doesn't like to be called a fox tho so I ended up calling him Sunshine. But yeah, wonder why I call Jake 'Puppy'?
I'm really happy he allowed me to call him that.
Because I will be calling him my Puppy for the rest of my life.
.
Jungwon's head turn to Jake as he look at him with wide eyes as if he's questioning something.
"Did I just hear you laugh?"
Jake nodded before running to him and hugging him.
I saw how Jungwon looks at Jay as if they're talking and just like that, Jungwon's gaze are now on me.
What did they just talk about telepathically?
Jay laughed at my face.
"Jungwon seems to suspect you have something to do with Jake's laugh and I just confirmed "
"Did you really converse through your mind?"
Jay nodded
"I'm not sure but I don't know how we came to understand each other. Just before when the oxygen mask is on his face is when we just stared at each other and boom, I kinda read hahaha I don't know"
Jungwon laughed as Jake pull away.
"Actually I also don't know how I understood him. Maybe because I see him everyday, I memorized his facial expressions"
I'm glad Jungwon is better now.
Jay brought out the food as we shared stories, and they share their own.
I miss this, when we just sat around and talk and laugh and of course eat, this is so great.
Jungwon can now feed himself according to Jay. I also kinda suspected that Jay actually fed Jungwon a lot before when Jungwon is still weak.
But now, seeing Jungwon still on that bed but with a smile that lasts longer than before, I'm really happy.
"Wait . . . did the tumor really was gone now?"
My eyes almost water as Jay mentioned the operation going successful but Jungwon still needs to rest to recover.
Jake's hands made their way to Jungwon's stomach and indeed, the bump is gone and is back to flat.
"Woah! I can't . . . thank goodness. ."
I don't know but I feel like I'm all over the moon when they said Jungwon will slowly recover.
Thank you Sunshine. . . oh wait . . is it ok if I still call you that? Is that puma kid gonna be mad at me?
With that short celebration in the hospital room, my mind suddenly has to do something so I called Jay for a bit.
"So out of the blue? What's up?"
"I like Jake. . . . "
I blurted out and he smiled.
"Really?"
"What?"
"You really did hit on him didn't you?"
I laughed as I remember the first day I met Jake where I asked Jay about him and he's like "why do you plan to hit on him?"
The thing is I didn't plan to, I just did and I didnt hit on him, I fell for him.
"Yah! You made it sound like I'm a playboy or something. . . just tell me . . tell me is it ok with you or his mom or. . . how will I take Care of him?"
"Hey . . . everyone holds something differently, how you hold your spoon is different from me. . . point is, how I will take care of Jake will not be the same with how you do it. . ."
"Why? . .isn't it the same? I mean you know how to for instance calm his nightmares, how will I do that?"
"*sigh* I'm his brother and you're going to be his lover, you kiss him, I don't, that simple. We're not the same with Jake , Sunghoon. How will you take care of him? You have to find out. Jake will also approach us differently. What I do will advice you, as you discover each other, embrace every flaw of him. Every darkness and fear and everything. Not just his smile and his light. . Everything Sunghoon. . "
_____________to be continued
How did you like the chapter so far? I'm sorry if it is full of JayHoon but hey, they're adorable. Haha one of the reasons I made them brothers here.