Hate That I Love You Still (S...

By scoutbrothel

93.9K 1.6K 4.1K

Spencer Reid and Y/N were past-time lovers in high school. But as graduation came about, their relationship w... More

1. before, part 1
2. before, part 2
3. after
4. wheels up
5. bottoms up
6. inner turmoil
7. girls night
8. moving day
9. boxed memories
10. watch your back
11. finally
12. home...maybe?
13. surprise!
14. making amends
15. haven't seen u in a while
16. forgiveness
18. teamwork
19. remember me forever
20. recovery
21. us, always
NOT A NEW CHAPTER

17. leave us alone

2.9K 49 128
By scoutbrothel

a/n:

I felt bad for not uploading for a while so here's another chapter my loves :)

tw: kidnapping, guns

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

"I insist." Spencer throws his hands up as he reaches for his wallet. You've been protesting that he does not have to pay for you, but he insists it is his treat.

"At least let me pay you back." You counter.

"No." He says as he looks down and shuffles through his wallet. 

You roll your eyes, knowing you are fighting something you can't win. "Fine. But next time it is on me." You say.

"Next time?" He smirks, while handing Willow money for the bill and mouthing a thank you so he doesn't interrupt what you are about to say.

"I mean, uh, if we ever find ourselves out to eat again it is on me." You scramble.

"We will cross that bridge when we get there, okay?" He says as he stuffs his wallet back into his pocket. You take a few more sips of your water before you decide you are full, and Spencer sits there patiently for you to finish. He finished his coffee and pancakes well before you. You are even a slow eater, as many people have liked to point out to you. Thankfully, Spencer doesn't say anything about it.

"Are we ready to go?" You say as you wipe your hands off on a nearby napkin. Spencer nods, and begins to stand up and walks to your side of the booth to help you up if needed.

"It was lovely to see you two again!" Willow projects from across the diner when she notices you two leaving.

"You too, Willow! Take care!" You wave goodbye and push the door open. You hear the door close behind you and Spencer trails behind you to the car.

"Here." He says as he opens the door for you and waits for you to get in. 

"Thanks." You say as he closes the door and you buckle in.

"To the lake now?" You eventually comment as he settles in the seat.

"If you want, yes." He says back, not looking at you. He has his attention directed towards backing the car up, his arm across the back of your seat and his eyes glued to the back of the car. You watch him intently as he focuses on moving the car.

"Yeah, that's fine." You say eventually, as he switches gears and the car crawls forward.

"To the lake then." He smiles, and darts off.

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

Your phone begins to ring, and you search through your bag until you finally find it. 

"Hello?" You say into the receiver.

"Hey, Y/N. It's Hotch."

"Hi, Hotch. What is up?"

"Is Spencer there with you?" He asks.

"Yes." You decide not to lie to him this time, especially since he apparently can tell when you are lying.

"Okay. Make sure he can hear what I am about to say." You switch the phone to speakerphone and tell Hotch he is good to speak.

"Great. We arrested the unsub, and it went smoothly. I just wanted to let you both know. So when you both make your way back home we will be at Quantico waiting for you both." He says.

"That's great Hotch." You comment. "Is everyone okay? I can imagine the takedown was a bit dramatic given the profile."

"It was." Hotch begins. "But nothing we can't handle."

"That's good." Spencer says beside you.

"I just wanted to keep you both updated. When should I expect you both back?" Hotch asks.

Spencer and you both look at each other, not sure when you were both planning on being back. Spencer pleads with his eyes for you to answer.

"Uh, probably tomorrow." You conclude, cringing a little at the close date you picked.

"Tomorrow? Great. See you both then." Hotch says and quickly hangs up before either of you can respond.

"Tomorrow, eh? Cutting the trip a little short now?" Spencer comments.

"That's the first time I could think of, sorry." You say genuinely. "Plus I do miss work."

"I do too. But you know you can't go into the field, right?"

"I can still travel with the team, I'm just stuck at the local PD or whatever. I'll take what I can get." You sigh, feeling stuck and bound to your past traumas. They are pulling you down- not allowing you to be the best agent you can be. You hate it.

"I see." Spencer says. "I'm glad you can at least follow along, you help a lot." He compliments.

"Thanks." You smile. "You too."

Silence falls between you two. The only thing you both hear is the sound of the car moving and the soft music emitting from the radio. It's quite peaceful, the open road. It brings back many memories of the rides to the lake back when you two were dating. The laughter and kisses seem so distant now, almost as if it existed in another lifetime.

You immediately recognize the landmarks that indicate that you are close to the lake. All the signs that point you towards the Strip are replaced with trees and bushes; even the air changes from city-like to fresh.

"We are here." Spencer announces as he pulls into the parking lot. You inhale a deep breathe, preparing yourself for the sight of the lake. It has been a really long time since you have been here, let alone you both. You've spent so much time thinking that you'd never come here with Spencer again, so it's surreal to you that it is happening right now.

"Everything okay?" He asks, noticing your distantness. 

"Yeah, I'm good. Let's go." You open your door and jump out of the car. Taking a deep breath of fresh air, you smile at the warmth the sun paints your cheeks with. The summery air pushes your hair around a bit, forcing you to tuck some of your hair behind your ears. 

Spencer waits patiently in front of the car for you, all while looking off into the distance. You approach him slowly, and attempt to creep up behind him.

"Boo!" You screech behind him. Except he stands still, and turns around completely unbothered. 

"Ready now?" He laughs.

"How did I not scare you?" You exclaim.

"I saw you coming." He shrugs nonchalantly.

"This is bullshit. I'll get you one of these days." You taunt.

"Alrightly." He smiles, while pushing his sunglasses up. You squint as you watch him do so, since you forgot your sunglasses in the car.

"You know you should really wear sunglasses, Y/N." Spencer begins as you two walk the trail towards the lake. "The sun exposure can ruin your eyes."

You roll your eyes at him. "Thanks, genius. I had no idea." You say sarcastically. 

As you both continue to walk, you can see the horizon of the lake coming into your view. 

"There it is." You say quietly. The last time you were 'at' this lake, it was when you were dying and saw it in your visions.

"Everything okay?" Spencer asks as you two finally come to a stop and settle down on a bench near the edge of the lake.

You stay quiet for a moment. That is, until you speak up and say, "Can I tell you something?"

Spencer's face twists with concern. "Of course, what is it?"

You take a deep breath and look away from his intense gaze. "When I passed out in the ambulance, I had a dream."

He looks at you, and waits for you to continue.

"When I 'woke up', I was here. In the dream, I wasn't hurt. It was peaceful, really." You say as you look down into your lap.

"You dreamt you were here?" He asks.

"Yeah. I didn't understand it at first." You sigh, composing yourself. "Until someone showed up." You say, looking up at him.

"What, me?" He asks, shocked.

"Yeah. You showed up." You sniffle. "And so did my dad."

"Your dad?" He asks.

"Yes. After you both disappeared I pretty much woke up." You sigh, rubbing your hands together awkwardly.

"Oh." Is all Spencer says in response. "Well, do you want to dance?" He asks randomly, not wanting to dwell on your dream any longer.

"What?" You say while laughing out loud.

"Sorry, that was really random and weird-" He tries to deflect what he just said.

"Yes, I do." You say while standing up and grabbing his hands with yours. You hang your arms off his neck and he rests his on your hips, and both of you move slowly together to the sounds of the nature in the background.

"I've spent the last 7 years missing you, Spencer. There wasn't a day that went by where you didn't cross my mind." You sigh into his chest.

"Me too, Y/N, me too. Everything I did to try and get rid of the lasting memory of you failed. There is no possible way I could get rid of you." He says back, making your heart swell. You look up at him, longing and adoring.

Without thinking, you press your lips to his. He doesn't hesitate to reciprocate the kiss, moving with you in harmony. He brings his hands to your cheeks, pressing them together as he deepens the kiss. You pull him closer to you, both your chests flush to each other.

After a few moments of kissing, you both pull away breathlessly and look at each other.

"I'm sorry, I really should stop kissing you so rand-" You begin before he cuts you off with another kiss.

"I don't mind." He whispers to you in between kisses. Suddenly, you feel your ankle roll on a rock and you grab Spencer for balance. But, you both fall down onto the grass, both a giggling mess as you roll around from falling.

"Are you okay?" Spencer asks seriously.

"Yes." You confirm while laughing.

You both lay on your sides looking at each other. Leaning in, you both lightly kiss again.

"As mad at you as I was when I first saw you again," Spencer begins, "I've been wanting to kiss you properly since then."

You smile wide. "Same."

"What on Earth?" You hear someone exclaim behind you two. You roll your eyes, immediately recognizing the voice.

"How did you know we were here?" You exclaim, looking up and behind you. 

"I followed you guys, duh!" You profile her, analyzing her to see what her motive is for being here.

"Why are you really here Kendra?" You sit up and turn to her.

"Well, you see. I am not very happy with where Spencer and I's conversation left off-"

"Why are you so interested in Spencer?" You ask, interrupting her.

"See, what you fail to realize, Y/N, is I have been interested in Spencer longer than you think." You watch her click something with her hand, confusing you. You and Spencer stand up, both knowing deep down something is wrong.

"I'm simply here to make sure I take what I want and get rid of anything that is in my way." She says.

You narrow your eyes at her. "How did you really know Spencer and I were even in Las Vegas?"

"You want the truth?" She taunts. "I'll tell you the truth. But first, you both need to sit down on that bench over there." She points to the bench you both sat at just moments ago.

"And if we don't?" You ask.

You watch as Kendra pulls out a gun from under her shirt. How did you not notice earlier?

"Okay, okay. We will sit." Spencer finally speaks up. He grabs you by your hand and leads you to the bench. Kendra has the perfect advantage right now- not only does she have a gun, but your ability to run at all is completely diminished due to the state your body is in, and the fact that you rolled your ankle just seconds ago.

"I was always there, don't you see, Spencer? I was always there." She sighs, crouching in front of him.

"Your first days at CalTech, the BAU, your apartment at, what is it? 937 Hoover St, apartment 23?" She smirks, as Spencer's face pales. Kendra has been stalking him since high school. How did he not notice?

"This place is pretty special to you guys, isn't it?" She grins, knowing she has full control of the situation. You rest your hands on Spencer's, trying to give him at least a little comfort.

You both stay quiet, trying not to fuel the power hunger journey Kendra is so very clearly on.

"Got nothing to say? Okay." She scoffs, walking circles around you two. "Well, I do. I never understood why you were so hung up on her all these years. She's...she's nothing compared to me!" She yells in both of your faces.

"She's everything compared to you." He hisses in her face. 

"Aw, standing up for her? That's cute." She drawls. She doesn't see it, but you managed to sneak your phone out behind you and text Penelope to call the police for you. You hoped and wished she would get it.

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

Penelope runs as fast as she can to the bullpen of the BAU to tell everyone what is going on.

"Hotch! Derek! Emily! JJ! Rossi!" She screams into the room.

"What is it baby girl?" Derek says.

"It's Spencer and Y/N! They are in trouble!" She cries.

"Woah, slow down babygirl. Tell us what is happening." Derek rests his hand on Garcia's shoulder to slow her down.

"Y/N texted me asking me to dispatch local PD to her location because they are in trouble. I tried calling her and Spencer but neither are picking up." 

"Did you track their locations?" Hotch asks.

"Yes. Both of them are at a lake in Las Vegas." Penelope phone dings once more. "Y/N just texted me again!"

"What did she say?" JJ asks frantically.

"Kendra Russell. That's all it says." She throws her hands up.

"Garcia, please go search Kendra Russell's name and see what you find. JJ, contact local PD and see what they find at the lake. We will go from there." Hotch says.

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

"What a pity. Such a shame." She drags her finger across the bottom of your face.

"What do you mean?" You say, staring at her.

"I've spent the past 8 years loving Spencer. And yet, he loved you." She looks at you. "I don't see it, you know?" She gives Spencer the side eye.

"Anyway, I've been planning for this moment for 8 years. The moment when I could finally get rid of you."

"You picked a poor time." You say back.

"Did I?" She smirks. "It's a shame what happened to you, really. Gary, his name was? He really loved Tammy, didn't he?" The color from your face drains. You never told her about Tammy, let alone your captors name. Kendra set it up.

"Oh, did I touch a nerve? Sorry about that." She laughs coldly.

"What do you want?" You hiss.

"Spencer, obviously." She laughs. "What I want you to do is to get up from the bench, walk away, and never speak to him again."

"That will be hard to do." You say as Kendra cocks her gun up into your face.

"How so?" She says as you stare down into the barrel of the gun.

"We work together, there is no way I wouldn't be able to talk to him." You protest.

"No exceptions. I have eyes everywhere." She says back.

"Okay." You say as you stand up.

"Y/N, wait-" Spencer begins to protest, but you hold a hand up to get him to stop talking. As you walk away, you know deep down Kendra isn't going to let you leave. You know the second you are far enough away, she will shoot. She has been planing this for years now, there is no way she will risk her plan by keeping you alive. All you have to do is time it right and dodge the bullet as you walk. You are playing with fire here, but it's the best you have until the police show up.

Hearing her ready her gun, you jump out of the way in the knick of time to dodge the bullet. It whizzes past you quickly, so close to you that it manages to shave your arm just a bit. 

"Kendra Russell, put your hands where I can see them!" A police officer announces behind you. You begin to worry though, because when you look up you recognize the single police officer that showed up.

"Tony?!" Both you and Spencer exclaim. Tony was a popular football player from your high school, and was actually one of the guys Kendra tried to set you up with in high school. Kendra was so intricate with her plan that she prepared for a situation where you attempted to call the police. 

"Kendra, you're in the clear." Tony says. 

"This is going to be fun!" Kendra laughs, while waving her gun around carelessly. "You know, I thought it would be better if Y/N was dead but..." She says as she taps the barrel of the gun to her lips. "I think it would be even better if you were alive."

"Separate them. And take them to the spot." Kendra says.

Tony walks up to you, and you attempt to break free by punching him as hard as you can. But Kendra is quicker, telling you if you even try to escape, she'll shoot you before you even get the chance.

"Okay. We will comply." Spencer says. 

"Aw, thanks sweetie." Kendra beams. 

Tony harshly grabs you by your arm and drags you across the field.

"Don't hurt her!" Is the last thing you hear Spencer say before Tony shoves you into a van.

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

"I contacted Las Vegas PD. They know nothing about a dispatch to that lake." JJ says as she rushes back into the BAU roundtable.

"And I tracked their phones but both connections went dead about 5 minutes ago." Garcia panics.

"God, Y/N cannot catch a break." Emily comments, while stressfully rubbing her face.

"Neither can Spence." JJ says too.

"We will find both of them. And we have a really good lead, too. Wheels up now." Hotch demands.

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

a/n:  I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Thank you so much for 7.9k reads, that's so insane <3

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