Naomi Black
I laid in bed that night unable to sleep.
The moonlight had turned into subtle sunlight.
I watched as it changed.
I laid on my side facing the window, my head rested on the pillow while I traced marks into my skin with my fingertips. Like Matti would when we were watching a movie. Or before we would go to bed.
I longed for that feeling.
I craved that feeling.
His lips, how they curved into that devilish smirk. His voice, how it sounded in the morning. Or how it sounded scratchy after a practice or a game. His calloused hands. His hair. His eyes held so much light.
His personality. How he could make me feel better in seconds. Or how he could break my heart just as fast.
Matti Williams was a man that needed no introduction around campus because he was the focal point of Happy Valley.
I pressed my right hand against my cheek to cup it like he would. I fluttered my eyes closed and pictured him. His smirk, his voice, his contagious laugh. Him.
It was my choice, it was a selfish choice.
I wasn't a coward for it.
I just wanted to go home at night and know I wasn't relying on someone else to fuel my happiness when I had worked so hard for so long to be content on my own. With all of the messed up shit Matti had done and with my reactions—I did need to pull back.
I thought I needed to pull back.
I had major issues because I wanted Matti more than he wanted me. But I was reluctant. After the Blake lecture yesterday, maybe I shouldn't dwell on the past. But I was hurting. I was not a coward. I had trust issues. I had been hurt before by men.
I couldn't sleep at all last night. I was fucking consumed by my thoughts. What I could've had. What I should've done differently. What I did wrong. What I did right.
Freshman year with Coen Miller had taught me that men weren't everything.
Sophomore year Mattison Williams had taught me that he was everything.
My emotions were on overload. I was overworking my brain to the maximum. All I did was study, read, think about Matti, and repeat. I wanted no distractions this year, but he had changed all of my plans.
As much as I thought I would be able to get over Matti, I knew I was in so deep that it would take years. I couldn't even look at another guy and find them attractive.
A knock on my door sounded, my alarm clock read 5:30 AM. Who would be up at this hour? "Come in," I spoke as the door cracked open.
Finn.
She came into my room with a bag in her hands. She walked over to my bed and stopped right in front of me. She dropped the bag on my chest and stared at me in silence. Although Finn could have her one-liners, she was quiet. I think it was because she felt like she was always outshined from Caden.
"I'm very observant." She speaks as I turn to face her. I raise my eyebrows.
"It's bullshit," She muttered as I chuckled. "What is?" I ask more like whispered.
"The fact that both of you guys are acting way too good for each other when you're both in love with each other." She pats my head and turns to walk towards my door to leave. "What's this?" I ask as she just shrugs. "It was outside of our front door for you." She walked out and closed the door behind her.
I sat up and turned on the lamp that was right next to me.
I opened the plastic bag, and inside it held a huge envelope. It was orange. I took the envelope out and opened the tab. Inside, it held a letter.
I opened the letter and covered my mouth with my hand.
"Black My Forever Is A Moment With You"
On the back of the letter was a $100 gift card that had a sharpie written, "p.s. Sorry about your ice cream."
I dropped the letter and gift card in my lap and sat with my hands in my lap. There are so many fucking reasons why I shouldn't go after him, so many, beyond measure. I hadn't felt like the way he made me feel in a while. Every emotion that I tried to hide in high school flew out of me. He made that happen.
Forever was a moment with me.
What was I thinking? I had a man that didn't want anyone, wanted me. And I wanted him.
Memories flew throughout my mind. When he hit me with the door, when I called him a waterboy, our first ice cream date, the parties, there were more good than bad. We weren't toxic—we were normal.
I flew out of my bed. I shouldn't go after him. I shouldn't do this to myself, I shouldn't. But I lost all common sense a long time ago when it came to Mattison Williams.
I ran into my bathroom and quickly ran a brush through my hair. I brushed my teeth so hard and so fast, I accidentally choked on my toothbrush when I went too far with it.
I washed my face, threw on some deodorant.
I ran back in my room, grabbed my phone, and bolted out my door.
All of the girls were waiting for me at the table. "Is this an intervention?" I ask as they smile at me. "Nope. Finn said that Caden called her before he left this morning for her to get something at the door." Nat nodded towards her.
"Forever huh?" Sloane smirks as I nod. "I need to go." I speak rushed as they put up their hands to stop me. "It's not even six in the morning!" Sloane yells. I'm running down the hallway as I yell back, "Matti is at the field!" They yelled in protest, but I didn't care at that moment.
"Don't worry, coach and I will go way back, remember?" I yell and close the door. I ran—no, I jumped down the stairs and out the front lobby door. My legs were carrying me so fast down College Ave, I could've actually gone out for the team.
The sunrise was beautiful, it was slowly coming up. But the sky had definitely lightened.
The campus was empty this early.
Turning the corner and speed walking up the walkway to Beaver Stadium, I approached the gate trying to not look like an absolute psychopath. I went up to the gate guard. "Pass and name?" He asked as I groaned. "Naomi Black. I don't have a pass." I speak as his eyes find mine.
"No pass, no entry." He states and I glare at him. "Call coach." I demand as he chuckles. "Bug one of the biggest coaches for a fan? No thanks." He denies me access again. I step back. "Listen. I'm pleading with you. You know Matti Williams?" I ask as he nods. "Who wouldn't know Matti Williams?" He chuckles.
I clap my hands, "Great. He will literally kick your ass if you don't let me through this gate right now." I spat at him as he reached for his walkie talkie. "A crazy girl named Naomi Black is up here. Can someone call campus security?" He asks as my mouth drops open.
He smiles smugly at me as I cross my arms over my chest.
"Let her in." I heard the deep voice of Coach over the radio. The gate guard's face dropped as I chuckled. He put down his radio and opened the gate for me. "My apologies Miss Black," He mutters. I wink at him, "Someone is going to lose their job." I mock as I whistle and skip away towards the offices.
It was Monday morning which meant that Matti wasn't on the field, he was lifting. I had no fucking clue where that was at so I had to go to the coaches offices to figure out. I walked through the unlocked door that led to the hallway of offices. I walked all the way down the hallway to the coaches office.
I stopped at coaches door and he winked at me. "I knew you weren't a stupid girl, Black. I was kinda getting worried for the generation you'd be providing me within the next 18 years. How the hell would your son be able to call the plays when his mother and father can't even hold onto their own thoughts?" He grinned after insulting me.
"You're pretty obsessed with Mattison and I. Stalkerish really," I mock him as he shrugs, "I like a happy ending. You deserve it." I freeze as he looks back down at his newspaper before sipping his black coffee.
"So, Coach, do you mind if I steal your QB1 for a minute? To make up?" I ask, batting my eyelashes. He puts his glasses that were on the bridge of his nose and places them on his head. "Do whatever the hell you want, just don't allow Reese off of that damn bench press," I chuckle at him.
"Where's the weightroom?" I ask and he looks back up at me again. "Down the hallway to the left. Oh and Naomi?" He asks as I smile at him. "Thanks." He thanks me and smiles. I nod at him and skip towards the weightroom.
I followed the smell of sweat and rap music.
But I was fucking intimidated.
I walked into the room and manliness surrounded me. Shirtless men everywhere. There were probably 70 men in here. I gulped.
Reese was at the bench press, I knew that for a fact. But, I was looking for his best friend. I walked toward everyone and scanned the crowd. "No. Fucking. Way." I heard whispers all around me.
"There's a girl in here," Someone said. The weights smacked the floor and all movement stopped. God, it's like they've never seen someone with a vagina before. And what the fuck does Webber give these boys? Steroids?
I look around the room and I can't find the eyes that had been captivating my dreams.
"Naomi, he's not here this morning. He is at a meeting." Griff speaks and smiles down at my now very embarrassed self. I slowly turned a bright red. I thanked him and then turned on the balls of my feet.
As I'm walking out I hear whistles from the boys inside of the room, I rolled my eyes.
I walk my way back to Webber's office. I knock on his open door to get his attention. He looks up from his computer screen at me and chuckles. "Hope the talk went well." He smiles at me. "Yeah, thanks for the heads up that he wasn't present this morning." I roll my eyes at him.
"How's your mom?" He asks me as I raise my eyebrows at his question. "Dead." I state as he folded his hands together and nodded. "You remind me a lot of her," He says as he stares at me. "You've met her?" I was shocked.
He chuckled, "Many times— she was not fond of me though," I nod for him to continue. He grimaces, "When she got a hold of your dad to tell her she was pregnant, he of course had his Steeler's family. But, his boys were back here. Still playing their due's to this team for their senior year. Karla was here too. I was here. And, I was his confidant in big situations like this." He paused before continuing.
I walked into the room and shut the door behind me. I walked towards the seating area and sat down across from him on the cool leather chair. He cleared his throat, "So he didn't believe your mom at first. But then, he did. Something just switched in him. He confessed to Karla. Karla was so upset and hurt over this situation, it got out to the press, she didn't believe for one second you were his baby. She was used to 'ball bunnies' trying to do this to their relationship all of the time. But, between you and I, I hated Karla." He smiled at me to ease the tension of the story he was telling.
"He came and told me what happened. He brought Rob, Blake's dad, with him as well. I opted for the abortion and so did your father." He paused as I glared at him. He shrugged it off before continuing, "He drugged your mother all the way here. She sat in this very office with Karla, Your dad, Rob, and I. We tried to convince her to go through with it because let's face it—his career went down, because of you. No offense." I scoffed.
"So when she said she wouldn't get the abortion everything just blew up. Karla and your dad broke up, your dad literally sent your mom back to Pittsburgh in a cab ride. Then he slowly destroyed himself. But you remind me so much of her, that fire in your eyes. You have a major attitude. I admire you for that," He finished speaking as I sat blank faced.
It was quiet between us for a few moments because how the hell do you respond to a person that just said they were a part of an interrogation to get your mom to abort you?
"I'm quite frankly, a speechless coach. Thank you so much for trying to abort me. Must be such a shame for you, that I'm in your office right now." I mock him as he chuckles. "Ah—Noami, you were a bad thing at the time. But, you're a good girl. You have your head on straight." He nods at me. I quirk my eyebrow at him, "Who are you hearing this from? Your best friend, Ben?" I ask as he chuckles.
"Blake." He says as I inhale. I definitely wasn't expecting that name.
"You're very good for Matti right now, you know that?" He speaks and sips his coffee mug. "He might be a pain in the ass, but that boy is dedicated to something when he wants it, like no other." I chuckle.
Memories of the night in Pittsburgh flashed in my mind—trust me coach. When he wants something, he gets it. Even if he has to work with it a bit.
"I couldn't believe when Matti came into my office telling me about his problems and he spoke your name, I couldn't believe it was actually you. I searched up your name in the system. It was you." He shook his head.
"In the flesh," I winked at him to ease the mood. "You know, Naomi. I'm very fond of you. I'm thankful you weren't aborted. If you ever need anything, my office doors are open." I nod at him and hop out of my chair. "Well, if you excuse me—I have a class to get to. Thanks coach." I nodded towards him as he waves by and sips at his white coffee mug again.
I spot a familiar person as I'm walking in the parking lot of the stadium. Before I could stop my mouth or my legs from taking me towards him, I'm going.
"Blake! Wait." I call out as he closes his trunk. I'm ten feet away as he turns around and rolls his eyes as he walks towards his driver side door. "Please. Can we talk?" I plead as he stares at me with his door open.
I gave him hopeful eyes as he looked me up and down. He was probably one of the most intimidating people on this damn planet. He nods at me and waves for me to get on the other side of the car.
I have about thirty minutes until class, so I definitely wanted to make amends since I had the time.
I walk over to the passenger side and he locks the doors.
I give him a look as if to say "What the fuck?" through the window but he ushers for me to step back. He presses some buttons on his dash before the door opens on its own, upwards. I raise my eyebrows.
Money grows from trees for every Penn State student—I swear.
I sit in the seat as he presses another button to close my door. I look over to him as he is tearing at the sides of a protein bar wrapper to eat. "I could've opened my door." I spoke as he shook his head. "My car. My door. But, you never should let a lady open her own door." He states as he finally gets the bar open.
He takes a bite and looks at me. "Are you gonna fucking talk? Or are you just here to waste my time?" He says with an attitude as my mouth drops open. He always has such a fucking attitude for no reason.
"That's not a way to treat your godsister." I chuckle as he rolls his eyes. "If you lived with us, you would've been a housemaid." He finishes his bar and turns on the car.
"Can we just get along—for Matti's sake?" I ask as he chuckles. "When I am nice to you, it is for him. Not for you, I hope you know that. But, I'll be nice to you without him—if you tell him the truth." He says as I glare at him.
"I am telling him the truth. He just doesn't know about my dad. I didn't lie, he just doesn't know." I state as he chuckles. "Uncle Ben is a great businessman, isn't he?" He mocks me as I sigh. I should've known that Matti would tell him about my personal life.
"You don't know what it is like." I point as he nods. "You know what, I don't. But, what I do know is that my best friend isn't acting like my best friend. Because of you. Naomi Black. Or my godsister. Whoever you are, you need to get your shit together. I'm not always going to be able to save you." He throws that in my face as I choke on my spit.
"I didn't need you to save me. I didn't ask you to save me." I state as he rolls his eyes. "Do you always have such a stick up your ass?" I ask as he hums. "Good one. Do you always play the 'my parents are deadbeats' card?" He asks as my eyes tear up.
"Let me out of the car you fucking asshole." I demand as he gladly presses the button again on his dashboard. He ushers for me to get out and I exit before he could even blink.
Before he could close the door I stood in the way. "Just wanted to let you know that I don't in fact always play that card. Because unlike you— not everything I do revolves around my parents . I have a mother that's six feet under and a father that you think is an amazing person, but in all reality, my mom died and he dropped me off on his parents porch steps. I had to work for absolutely everything I have ever had, and I wont let you belittle me like the football fucking imbecile you are. To play that card—I would have to have parents to talk about. But I never had any and if I did—it was eight years ago, before I buried one six feet under." I spat my words at him before storming away from him.
I walked as fast as my tiny legs would let me across the parking lot. I made it to the sidewalk of College Ave when the black Tesla came hurling at me. It came to a quick stop as the passenger door opened. "Get in." He demanded as I ignored him and continued to walk.
"I don't give people pity. Get in the car, Black." He yelled as I continued to walk. I hear a car door open and footsteps behind me. I'm lifted off of the ground and I kick my legs as he carries me back to his car.
He sets me in the car, reaches over me and buckles me in. Essentially trying to tell me, I'm staying. He walks over to the driver's side, sits, and closes both of the doors. He doesn't move the car though.
"Are you going to sit all quiet or are you waiting for a good time to degrade me even more?" I ask in spite as he plays with the rings on his fingers. "I have class to be in—" I look down at my phone. "—In twenty minutes." He nods.
"When your dad always came over to my house growing up—I could tell he was always on something. My dad taught me to hate your mom and you—" I snicker at his rude comment.
"Why, because I ruined Ben's career?" I mock as he nods. "And as much as I think you're good for Matti—I think you'll ruin him as well." He admits as I cross my legs and glare at him. "Are your mood swings always this drastic?" I ask as he stares at me.
"You're good for him in life, you aren't good for his career." He reiterates for me. "So, you'll save me from getting assaulted and you'll harass me in a parking lot, just so you can tell me that you only like Matti for certain things?" I ask as he nods.
"Exactly. Glad we're on the same page." He gives me a smug grin as I glare at him.
"I think you'll be great for him in college, but when he steps into the real world. It's going to be miserable for the both of you." He states as I continue to just stare at him. "I mean think about it. You guys get together now, it's all fun and dandy until he's bound to end up with a stripper like your dad. Social media is huge now, and nobody wants a bad representation of the NFL." He mocks me as he puts the car in drive.
"Where are we going?" I ask as he starts to press the gas. "Taking you to class." He speaks as I just sit in confusion. "You're making no sense." I state as he chuckles. "It is easy. You tell him that you've been lying to him the entire time—he's going to be more pissed than hurt. He finds out from someone else, he's going to be all hurt—no piss. Our season will be ruined because he doesn't play well with emotions. We just learned that. So, be friends with him. Don't date. You guys are going to break each other's hearts." He states as if it were easy to comprehend.
I sit in silence as I try to sink his words into my head. But the future with Matti is all I'm thinking about. Maybe I just needed to be friends with him because if we were to be anything else, he would end up hurting me.
The drive is cut short by him pulling to the curb, "I'll be friends, but I'm not telling him about my dad." I state as he nods. "Your choice." He closes the door as I watch him speed away into morning traffic.
I walk up the big hill. I had to see Matti today because I wanted to set things straight.
I walked into the building and it was empty, you could hear a pin drop. I was kind of early, but I thought someone would at least be here. I walked over to the vending machine and grabbed some sour patch kids and water. If anything was going to get me through a stressful conversation—it would be those two things.
I walked towards the classroom but the door was shut.
I heard silent giggling, and thumping. Someone was getting it on?
Whoever it was was very fucking bold to be having sex in the classroom we were supposed to be having class in—in about fifteen minutes. I walked back down to the sitting area and waited for others to show up.
But I wanted to know who was fucking in the classroom.
Sitting in one of the comfy chairs, I curled my legs to my chest and played on my phone. I went on Instagram. Nothing really special was on there, just the sorority's posting about bid days.
I was catching up on all of the drama and gossip on my hometown facebook page. I really was invested in reading about how Maddy Clarkson was pregnant with Mr. Michaels (our high school math teachers) baby.
I was so invested that I didn't hear the bookbag slap the floor in front of me until I saw the long legs slouch into the chair directly across from me.
He sat with his phone in his huge hands while he was biting his lip reading whatever he was reading. His long legs were covered by gray Nike sweatpants and he was wearing a "Penn State Football" zip up jacket. He had a beanie on top of his messy head. His choice of shoe was his ugg slippers.
Cute.
I cleared my throat, "Excuse me—do you think I could get an autograph? I'm a huge fan." I spoke quietly. His eyes left his phone as he met mine. I cracked a smile at him as he tried to hold a straight face. He looked back at his phone not caring to comment back on my words.
His left hands fingers played with his oh so kissable pink lips that most girls on campus desired more than a PlanB.
My smile dropped and I tried to not show it in my face that I was disappointed that my plan was slowly getting ruined. I looked back down at my phone. It vibrated.
"Depends, does the huge fan forgive me?" The text from Matti read.
I dropped my phone in my lap and looked back up at him. His small smile was on his face. His bright blue eyes are full of hope. I smiled at him and nodded. He looked back down at his phone and then my phone vibrated again.
"Friends, Black?" The text asks. I look back up at him and stand up. I walk over to him and stand in-front of his large body. He stares up at me. I stare straight at him.
"Well, are you going to hug me or what?" I ask as a silly smile plays out on my face. He chucks his phone on the chair right next to him and stands up. His large arms reach out to grab me.
His arms swallow my body as he lifts me up off of the ground and spins me around in a hug. My face is smooshed in his neck, I'm inhaling his godlike scent.
Jesus fuck.
"I missed you." I say while still off the ground. He sets me down in front of him. He has a huge smile on his face. "I missed you more, Black ." He says.
I take a step back, sticking out my hands. "Naomi Black, nice to meet you." I say as he chuckles. "Matti Williams, it's a pleasure." He shakes my hand and we giggle.
"Do you wanna skip?" I asked with hope because I really wanted to talk with him. "Wow, Naomi Black. We just met and you want to skip class? You're a troublemaker." He jokes.
"Not a troublemaker, I just know of this really good ice cream place. I happen to have a gift card that randomly showed up at my door..." I trail off as he smirks down at me.
He nods and goes to speak but he's cut off by another voice.
"Fuck- Peter." A woman's voice moaned out. His eyes widened as mine copied. Holy shit.
Peter was in the classroom. He was banging a girl in the classroom.
I put my finger up to my lips in order to hush Matti from the howling laugh he was about to let out. I giggled as I watched him try to contain his contagious laughter. "Who is the chick?" I mouthed. He bent down to my left ear. "I don't know. Wanna go find out with me?" His murmured voice sent tingles all the way down my body.
Just friends, Naomi.
I smiled and nodded as he grabbed his stuff. I walked back over to my stuff as well. We had about six minutes until classes started. We tiptoed towards the door. We hid in the tiny corridor that held the art supply closet.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuck, Nicole," Peters voice moaned out as Matti and I froze. I slapped my hand over my mouth as Matti smirked. I grabbed his hand and ran away from the classroom that was currently filled with the moans of Dr. Metz and Peter.
I opened the door to the outside of the building as our classmates started to walk in.
"That guy—is the fucking man," Matti laughed out as I giggled. I looked up at him as the cold wind whipped past us. It was so cold out that you could see the air we released from our mouths into the air.
"Come on—let's get out of here. I'm freezing." He grabs my hand and we walk towards—not his jeep. "Yo, what is that thing?" I laugh out loud as I look at the sport's car.
He nods towards it, "That my ride while I get my snow tires put on Camille." He tosses the keys up in the air and catches them as he looks back at me and smiles. He chuckles at the look on my face.
"I usually wait at the place while they're putting new tires on my car." I speak as he laughs at me. "Wanna drive it?" He winked at me as I gasped.
"You'd let me?" I speak as he chuckles. "Yeah," He chucks the keys of the black BMW at me. He reaches for the bookbag that was in my hand. He takes it off of me as I stand and stare at the key that is in my hand. He laughs at me as he walks to the driver's side door. I follow him as he opens it and motions for me to get in.
"Usually I don't let people I've just met—drive me. But it's all good." He jokes as I giggle nervously and sit in the car. He shuts my door and opens the one directly behind me and sets our bags in. He walks over to the passenger side and opens his door. He slides in and closes the door before chuckling.
"Naomi—fix the seat. You can't even reach the pedals." He laughs as he points at my feet that are a good foot away from the brake and gas. I look around the side of the seat trying to find the buttons. I was cut off by a large body reaching over mine. His face was directly hovering over the top of my legs as he adjusted the seat forward.
I nervously giggled as he looked up at me. "Always doing everything for you," He jokes as I raise my eyebrows. "How is that? We just met." I speak as he hums. He drags his hand across the top of my thighs as he goes to sit back into the passenger seat. He stares forward as I just look at him.
Fucking hell, I wanted to rip his clothes off.
He buckled his seat belt and then chuckled. He looked over at me. "You gonna start the car orrrr...?" He led off as I scrambled to start it. I giggled as he chuckled.
I pressed the button to start the engine and when it started—it purred.
Pretty sure something else was purring too.
I cleared my throat.
"So, don't kill me. I know we're strangers but I happen to have a multimillion dollar—" I cut his obnoxious speech off as I rev the engine. His eyes widened and he gulped. "Relax Williams, I'm not going to kill you." I winked as I put the Beemer in drive. I stepped on the gas and pulled out of the parking spot.
"Do you like sports cars?" He asked as I chuckled. "My dream car is a White BMW," He smirked at my comment and nodded.
As I pulled out of the parking lot I sat and had a 'come to jesus' moment with myself. I loved Matti Williams so much that I was willing to put my own feelings aside and recognize that I couldn't be the one to ruin his future. Like Blake said, I had already ruined one man, I couldn't bear the thought of ruining another.
"When is your birthday?" He asked as I turned left.
"November 26th. What about you?" I asked as he chuckled. "A sagittarius? My birthday is June 7th. I'm a gemini." He smiled at me. I looked at him as it slowly started sprinkling.
And from that moment I knew that I would never be able to get over Matti Williams.
And that maybe in another lifetime, I would have a happy ending with this loser, when he wasn't the actual Matti Williams.
And I didn't have a chance of ruining his future.
"That means that we're meant to be." He continues as I sit silent. I hum, "Oh is that so?" I tease as he chuckles. "Listen, I know my zodiac shit, Black." He argues as I giggle.
I pull into the creamery.
"Wanna get pizza?" He asks as I turn and look at him. My mouth dropped open. "What?" I ask as he chuckled. He nodded again before repeating himself, "Do you want to go get pizza?" I stare at him and nod.
He steps out of the car and rushes over to my side as I turn off the car and wait for him to open my door. He opens the door and I smile at him as I step out. He closes the door behind me as I open the back door and grab my wallet. As soon as the wallet was in my hands—it was ripped out and thrown up towards the dashboard. I gasp as he moves me and shuts the door before locking it.
"Mattison!" I laugh as he shrugs and grabs my hand and drags me towards Hi-Way pizza. We enter into the delicious smelling shop and it takes everything inside of me to not outwardly moan at the smell.
Matti drags me up to the counter as a guy walks up to the cash register, "Welcome, what can I get you guys?" He asks as Matti orders. Matti hands him his credit card and the guy freezes. "Wait—as in thee—" Matti cuts him off by nodding at him.
The guy behind the counter hands him back the card. "On the house," Matti thanks him as the guy pulls out a paper for Matti to autograph. I stand back and watch him do all of this.
The guy's face lights up as Matti hands it over to him. He smiles at him and my heart flutters. He was a good person. He didn't deserve me to ruin his future—he made so many people happy.
He taught so many people to love the sport that he loved.
Matti ushered us towards a two seater table on the side and pulled out my chair to sit down. I thanked him and sat as he walked to the other chair and sat. He stared into my eyes as I watched him.
"Do you enjoy this?" I ask as he raises an eyebrow at my question. "Do you enjoy the attention?" I ask again as he sucks in a breath. "I think—it's something I'll definitely have to get used to. But, the look on peoples faces when they see me as some type of superhero—it's indescribable." He said softly. I smiled at him as he looked into my eyes.
"Are you going to be an ER nurse?" He asks as I shake my head. "I want to be a pediatric nurse. With babies." I specify as he nods. "You like kids?" He asks as I shrug.
"I don't like them enough to have my own," I say as his eyebrows raise. "That's a shock." He says as I chuckle. "Why children then?" He asks as I pause. "I want to give care to children that don't get care like they should," I mumble as he sits up.
"In what way?" He grilled me as I cleared my throat. "I just wish to give love and care to children like I should've been given." I confessed.
Instead of him pressuring me to give more answers he just loses all facial expression. He reaches for my knuckles as he rubs his thumbs against them. He always does that.
"What Black? You're telling me you don't want to be a mom because of your mom or because of your parents?" He asks me in shock as I shrug.
"You know what, Black. You'd make the best mom. I'm having my own football team— not now of course but maybe somewhere down the road. I'm not down with the whole young dad thing, I got shit to accomplish. But when I do, trophy wife and mommy car, all of that. But, I can't buy my kids to like me as a dad. You don't have to buy your kids anything to make them like you Naomi, they'd just like you because you're you." He smiled at me as I just looked down at the metal table.
"And deep down, Black. I think you know you'd make a good mom too. If we don't have kids together, I'll tell you about mine. I promise." I looked up at him in awe.
He chuckled at my expression.
"Hi. Order for Matti and Naomi? Large Pepperoni?" A guy interrupts us by juggling a pizza platter.
I looked down at the table again as the man placed the pizza in between us separating us from our conversation. And the pizza was a metaphor. Because the actual thing separating us was Matti's future.
And I would do anything for my friends even if it meant sacrificing my own happiness.
HEY BESTIES! HOLY WOW! 26,000 OF YOU GUYS?!? WE ARE GROWING SO SO SOOOO FAST! I LOVE YOU GUYS! THIS IS A TEAM EFFORT & THANK YOU FOR FALLING IN LOVE WITH THIS BOOK!
I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE CHAPTER! VOTE & COMMENT! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT!
STAY SAFE BESTIES!