Chapter 16
Sho's POV-
It's been a week since I last met Sakura. I angrily left her apartment. It made me angry how easily said that the Takuya bastard is there for her. As her best friend, can't I be there when she needs me? After I left, she messaged me apologizing. Well, I also pretended that it was nothing to be angry about. But it really made me angry.
Arashi was on a location shooting. It was Sunday. I planned on meeting with Sakura but she told me that she already had plans with Takuya and it spoiled my mood again. Seems like Sakura and Takuya were going to meet Sakura's parents. They wanted to meet him too. We were sitting in our vanity van. I was reading a newspaper. Not exactly reading but pretending that I am reading but I am just thinking about Sakura and Takuya and it was irritating.
I slammed the newspaper on the table.
"Oye! I think instead of irritating yourself, why don't you properly accept your feelings and confess Sakura-chan!?" I heard Aiba saying.
"Sho-kun, Aiba-kun is right! Otherwise, you will be late!" now it was Nino.
I ignored those two.
"Don't ignore us! We are saying for your sake!" Aiba-kun said.
"Urusai!" I got up and left the van.
I really don't behave like this. I am always calm in any situation but now I am so fed up. I feel frustrated because Sakura easily moved on from me. Was I feeling sad and hurt?
I looked at the sky.
Soon the shooting started and I didn't find time to think about Sakura again.
In the evening, as the shooting ended, we got back in our car to go back home. I took out my phone to check for any updates. I saw Sakura's messages.
Sakura: Sho, my parents really liked Takuya. I told him that I was happy to marry him. Dad said he is perfect for you. We haven't decided on the date yet but Takuya says that he wants to get married soon so my parents also said that next month would be perfect. I will call you at night. Otsukare~
So, she finally decided to marry him. I just sat silently staring at the message. Suddenly, my eyes felt watery and few drops of water fell down on the phone screen. I wondered what it was and then I realized as those drops rolled over my cheeks, it was my tears.
Aiba-kun was sitting beside me. I didn't move. But maybe he noticed because he held my hand.
"I told you, you'll be late!" he said sadly.
Others looked at me. Jun-kun gave me his handkerchief and I wiped my tears.
"Talk with her," Ohno-san said.
After that, no one talked. Everyone was silent. How could they understand me even when I don't say anything? Their care and kindness are making me cry more. I kept looking outside the window till we reached home.
I went back to my room as soon as we had our dinner. I took bath and was sitting on my bed trying to write lyrics. My phone rang. The caller was Sakura. I walked into the gallery as I picked the call.
"Moshi Moshi (Hello) Sho!" she sounded cheerful.
"Doushita (What happened)?" I asked her.
"Nothing. I told you that I will call you at night." She spoke.
"Ah, yes!" I said plainly.
She told me how meeting with her parents and Takuya went. I was just listening.
"Naa Sakura..." I cut her in between.
"Hmm?"
"Are you really happy with your decision?" I asked her.
There was no answer. I understood. She took it just to get over me. That idiot.
"I knew it. Sakura, it was because of me, right?" I asked her.
Again, no answer.
"Good night Sakura! Answer me when you will have the actual answers to my questions." I said and cut the call.
I am being an idiot too.
Sakura's POV-
Sho's questions really surprised me. Why he would ask something like that when finally, I was trying to get over him?
I had messaged Ai telling her about today too. She had replied just one line.
Ai: Aisuru nara, chanto saigo made onaji hito wo aise! (If you love someone, then properly love that same person till the end)!
I know. I know it! Why everyone keeps on saying it!? I am doing my best to get over the fact that Sho and I can be nothing more than friends. He doesn't feel the same for me that I feel for him. I know it more than anyone else. Why can't they understand that this was the hardest decision for me to take? Well, I couldn't blame them for this.
I was wrong. I should have stopped myself from feeling too deeply. But now I am finally giving up. It's not like I hoped that he Sho would love me. I knew that. I knew that but, a little thread of hope was still in my heart. But now that thread is also broken. On that day when he told me that he didn't have any feelings for me. That day I threw away that little hope. I will try my best to be happy with Takuya.
After a few days-:
It's been a while since I visited Takuya's home. We had planned to make dinner together tonight. So, after work, we went to his home together.
"Ojamashimasu (Thank you for having me)!" I said as I entered his house.
He handed me a pair of slippers and went inside. I followed him after I wore the slippers. He put the bags he was holding on the kitchen counter.
"It's been a while since you came here Sakura!" he said as he took a seat on the sofa.
"Hai. But everything's the same. You really like to keep your house clean, right Takuya!" I chuckled as I sat beside him.
"I am not messy like you Sakura!" he laughed at me.
"Hai hai!" I frowned.
Suddenly, I felt like he was coming close to me. Before I could react, his lips had already touched mine. I shivered. It lasted for almost like 5 to 6 seconds. Not too long. He pulled back. I was shocked not knowing how to respond.
It's not like it was our first kiss. He had kissed me before. And both of the time I was just too shocked to respond. That time I didn't know that he loved me. But this time, our relationship is different. We are going to marry. He got up and went towards the kitchen.
"Sakura, let's prepare dinner." He called me.
"Ah, hai!" I broke my train of thoughts and went towards the kitchen.
In the next hour, we prepared dinner and set the table.
"Itadakimasu!" we both said before taking the dinner.
It was delicious. Takuya loves to cook and he is really good at cooking. I love the dishes he makes. While having dinner we mostly talked about work or any other things. I was trying to avoid talking about the kiss earlier.
"Gochisousama deshita!" we both said.
I helped him clean the dishes. And after we were done, we sat on the sofa drinking beer.
"Sakura, stay here for tonight." He suddenly said.
I looked at him.
"Ah, okay!" I agreed.
"I think that we should move in together." He said.
"Eh?" why he suddenly brings up such topics?
"We are getting married so it's obvious. This is my own house so the rent of your apartment can be saved. And we will get to know each other more." What he was saying was actually thoughtful.
"But, I really haven't thought yet." I don't know what to answer. "I need some time Takuya," I told him.
"Okay! Take your time Sakura!" he smiled looking at me.
"Thank you, Takuya!" I gave him a small smile.
And then he kissed me again. But this time, his kiss was different. It was more passionate and deeper. His hands were cupping my face. I didn't kiss him back. But his kiss was getting deeper and deeper. One of his hands pulled me closer to him. His pressure slowly increased and I fell on the sofa with him on top of me. He didn't break the kiss. It was too much for me to process. But somehow, I responded. I kissed him back. For a few seconds, we did nothing but kissed.
Now, he slowly started kissing my neck. His hands playing with my body. Suddenly, those moments flashed in front of my eyes. The moments of that worst day of my life. When I was raped.
Somehow, I felt disgusting. I wanted him to stop. But he is Takuya. I am going to marry him. He is different. He is not like those filthy men. I should endure. He started opening the buttons of my top. I remembered how those men tore apart my dress that day. I closed my eyes and tears started rolling down. I was remembering each and everything those men did with me.
'Yamete! Yamete! (Stop! Stop)' I was yelling in my mind.
'Dare ka tasukete (Please somebody help me)!'
'Sho! Help me!'
I could not endure anymore.
"SHO!" I yelled and pushed Takuya away from me. I sat on the sofa clenching my unbuttoned top.
"Sakura?" Takuya came near me.
"Stop it! Please don't do anything to me!" my eyes were closed. I totally forgot that he was Takuya.
"Sakura! Are you okay? It's me Takuya!" he sat beside me and held me by my shoulders.
I opened my eyes and saw him looking at me with concern.
"Sakura, what happened?" he asked me.
"Takuya! I'm sorry! It's just all those painful moments flashed in front of me. I was afraid! I thought that..." I couldn't complete the sentence and broke down.
Takuya hugged me.
"It's my fault Sakura! I was rushing things. I am sorry for hurting you." He apologized.
"Takuya, I am sorry but can I go home for today?" I really wanted to be alone.
"Okay! I will drop you." He said to me.
"Drop me till station, I can go home from there," I told him.
He nodded. I fixed my dress and we left his house. He dropped me at the station and after that, I went home on my own.
I threw myself on the bed as I entered my apartment.
I don't know why but I was uncomfortable with Takuya doing all such things. It may be because I have never thought of it in that way. But we are going to marry so I should change myself. I laid on the bed thinking about it. After half an hour or so, I heard the bell ringing.
Thinking about who might it be, I walked towards the door and opened it. I never thought he will be standing there.
"Sho?" I was shocked to see him at such a time.
Sho's POV-
I just got back from a photo shoot and was just going to take a bath when my phone rang. It was from that Takuya bastard.
"Moshi Moshi (Hello)!" I answered the call.
"Can you please go to Sakura's apartment?" he asked me.
"Why?" I wondered what happened to her.
"Well, I can't tell you much but I think right now she needs you, it's frustrating though." He said and cut the call.
I didn't know what to do. But he sounded serious so I wore my coat and left. After some time, I reached her apartment and rang the doorbell.
In a few seconds, the door opened. She looked at me surprised. "Sho?"
I didn't say anything. She suddenly hugged me and started crying.
"Sakura?" I hugged her back. "What happened?" I asked her. Did that Takuya guy do something?
She broke our hug.
"Let's go in!" I said and we went inside. We sat on the sofa. She was still crying.
"Can you tell me what's wrong? Suddenly, Takuya called and told me to go to your apartment. Did he do something?" I asked her.
She moved her head in no.
"Then what happened?" I asked her again.
She wiped her tears.
"I remembered about that day again." She said with a pain in her voice. "It was not Takuya's fault. Everything just flashed in front of my eyes and I pushed him away. I had hurt him!" she said hiding her face in the palms of her hands.
I kind of understood what happened in them.
"Idiot! It's not your fault." I told her as I held her hands. "I can't say that I can understand your pain because there is no way I can understand it. But Sakura it's not your fault. Everything needs time to change. People need time to heal. No one will blame you for taking time to heal. Take your time Sakura. I know Takuya will understand you."
"Sho!" she looked at me with teary eyes and hugged me once again.
As I hugged her back, I thought about how time should stop here. The only thing I can do for her to feel relax is to stay with her, to be with her.
"Sakura, you're tired. Go to sleep." I said as I took her to her bedroom.
I tucked her in the bed.
"Oyasumi (Good night)! Jaa na (Bye)!" I turned to leave but she held my hand.
"Please stay with me Sho!" she said with her weak voice.
"Hai!" I said and sat beside her on her bed.
She didn't leave my hand.
"Sing something for me." She said to me.
"Eh?" what the hell she is thinking. "Sakura, are you an idiot?"
"Shut up and sing something!" she said as she closed her eyes angrily.
I smiled and started thinking about what song to sing. She behaves like a kid sometimes.
I remembered she said that she loves the song 'Be with You'.
Hodou ni naranda fusoroi na futatsu no kage
Yorisou you ni nobite yuku
Awatadashii toki no naka nagasarenai you ni
Bokura te wo tsunaida...
Two asymmetrical shadows lined on the ground
Are spreading to get close
So that we won't be washed away inside the fleeting time
We joined our hands...
Hitogomi ga nagarete
Isogu hito no naka de
Kanashiku natte kimi no namae yonda
Crowds of people are flowing
And among those hurried people
I became lonely and called your name
Toorisugita kaze no nioi
Atarashii kisetsu he hora iro ga kawatteku
The wind's scent was left behind
Look towards the new season, the colors are changing
Kimi no koe de sono egao de sono subete de
Me wo hiraite boku wa arukeru
Donna kako mo donna asu mo wakachiaou
Dakara boku wa kimi no moto ni
Because of your voice, your smile, your everything
I can open my eyes and walk
No matter what past, no matter what tomorrow, let's share it
That's why I'm beside you.
Finally, she fell asleep. I slowly kissed her forehead and went to sleep on the sofa.
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Hey guys! I'm back with a new chapter. Hope you enjoyed reading it.
I finally got a job and I started working yesterday as an application developer trainee.
I hope I enjoy my work!
Anyways, I hope you all are safe and happy.
Comments are always welcome!
Take care!
Bye!
~Priti (Tacchan)