“I’m not taking everything too fast, am I?”
Anna looked puzzled. “Taking what fast, exactly?”
Many months have passed in the form of bliss. In spite of how December have crawled and faded into a hopeful New Year, to Elsa, it still felt like yesterday was the fateful July that brought her so many surprises; pleasant and whatnot—as if time mocked every meaningful, long lasting second Elsa has spent with every soul she held dearly.
To others, or to most people, each Season symbolized how things shift and change—that was what every autumn leaf, each blooming flower and the summer heat defined all too well—but to her no season was palpable, regardless of the snow descending from the dreary skies at the moment since it is still the middle of January.
It wasn’t the season, nor is it how trees were deprived of leaves, how the sun rose and how the moon sets everyday—it was growth that is the evidence of how time flies.
Like the time Elsa saw Aiden conversing comfortably with a team member with a smile, and he wasn’t just nodding to show he was listening when apparently he was not—he was actually interested with whatever topic they were talking about. She was also surprised to find a little spark of mischief among his green eyes when he snuck his presence into her office—not that it was a bad thing—most especially when he leaned in and pulled her in to a heated kiss. All she had to say that it really was an eventful lunchbreak.
At that time, she was also worried.
The changes with him were so overwhelming she had this intense fear for a moment, that he would completely change. She didn’t want him gone—she didn’t want the man who would fall asleep during a Marilyn Monroe movie gone, she didn’t want the man who would hum a love song against her hair gone.
She didn’t want him gone. She didn’t want someone different gone.
But when she witnessed how he could still be flustered around her, or anybody occasionally, perhaps he wasn’t entirely changed. When she saw him watching the Misfits rather than the private golf game Heine was pulling him into, her worry ceased slowly.
And when he still asks how was her day every time they jump in that shiny red KIA of his to escape somewhere, anywhere, she would still answer with a chuckle or a laugh that it has been great—and he would drop a quick kiss on her temple to let her know that he was listening each second they chattered in the midst of New York’s traffic.
That was when she concluded he was still the same.
Steering her attention away from the fire roaring in the hearth, Elsa sank on to the loveseat with a heavy sigh. The redhead straightened herself from her own seat and frowned at her older sister’s anxiety.
“Anna...” Elsa began.
“I’m all ears.”
“How long did it take you to realize that... It was Kristoff?”
Anna blinked at the unexpected question, her other hand on top of the other as she poked her knuckles, a habit of hers, “You mean, how long we dated before we got married?”
Elsa nodded silently, her face buried in her hands in what may be distress.
Still perplexed, Anna answered nonchalantly, “A year, or less. Usually others would take up to years, but I don’t know. It just happened and we know it ourselves we want to spend the rest of our lives around each other, everyday. Like, you just want to wake up next to him and you can’t imagine anybody else spending eternity with you but him.”
The blonde sucked in a breath shakily as she folded her arms, “Oh my god.”
Anna’s expression shifted into one of realization and shock as she perked up on her seat with a gasp, “Oh. Oh gosh. Elsa you really want to tie the knot—”
“Yes. Damn it, yes, Anna, I want to, I badly want to. But there’s a slight problem,” Elsa bit her lip.
“And what could that be?”
“What if he thinks I’m taking our relationship too fast? What if he’ll start to look at me as if I’m some crazy woman who is drooling after his heels?” Elsa blurted out nervously.
Anna shook her head. “Elsa, you know it yourself that you’re not like that, you’re just overthinking! And it seems like you’ve made up your mind.”
Elsa frowned, “But what if I’m not using my mind correctly right now? Oh god am I being irrational right now?!”
“No, and no. This is you making a decision that you are not too sure about when actually you are, because you don’t know what Aiden feels about it right now. Calm down and take a breather,” Anna reassured, “I’ll ask you a few questions. Do you love him?”
Elsa’s eyes sparkled almost instantly, and she answered, “Of course I do.”
“You don’t want anyone but him?”
“Yes.”
“You accept his imperfections, any sort of flaw and you’ll be fine with them for life?”
“Accurately.”
“Do you want to see him whenever he’s at his best OR at his worst?”
“I love him either in tears or with a smile.”
“Then I don’t see the problem—unless Aiden thinks otherwise, that is,” Anna sheepishly spoke, “While I think it’s better if you both talk about it–” “No, no, I... I’m too afraid to talk to him about it, Anna. I have this doubt in my head...”
“What doubt?” Anna asked with a quirked brow.
“What if he doesn’t want me?” Elsa sadly closed her eyes, “I meant, what if he doesn’t want to share his life with me yet? What if he’s still... Uncertain that it will be me? No, actually, maybe it isn’t me...”
“Oh for godsakes sis, the man looks at you like you’re his world,” Anna groaned, “There’s always this twinkle in his eye whenever he looks at you. He saved you from a bullet, he wants to give you what he can, it’s all in his eyes for crying out loud. Not to mention that one time in your office I caught you two—”
“Anna!” Elsa furiously blushed.
“Okay, okay, sorry. I just can’t believe I’m having this conversation with you right now,” Anna grinned, “I mean, you used to be...”
Elsa chuckled, “Stoic?”
The redhead let out a bark of laughter, “I was going to say uninterested, but hey, that works too.”
Elsa smiled softly, “Well, I enjoy talking to you like this. I’ll have a child, a husband, anyone from the future—but you’re my best friend, Anna. Distance didn’t make us drift apart from each other. You’re my sister, and I’ll always be happy speaking to you, be it when I have a problem or I simply want to.”
“D’aww.”
“Are you crying?” Elsa laughed.
“No, stupid, Chef Leonardo assigned me as substitute to chop onions—of course I am crying, silly,” Anna sniffled, “I haven’t talked to you like this for so long. It’s like we’re talking before you walk down the aisle.”
Elsa’s smile faded.
“Hey, Anna.”
Anna looked at her.
“We’re not starving for love, are we?”
Anna paused—a frown reappearing on her features. Her brows furrowed, and the question the blond asked weighed heavier than she thought when she couldn’t think of an answer.
What kind of question was it anyway?
What was she trying to say?
“W-what do you mean?” She shuddered with a grimace.
“You know damn well what I meant, Anna. We lost mama and papa,” Elsa sobbed, and Anna knew her older sister wasn’t lying, “Are we—a-are we just desperate for love?”
Anna stared at her sister for a brief moment, blue orbs reflecting upon its same color—only that they were different shades—and it’s just so funny. They never seemed to look like sisters, and they were polar opposites as Elsa was much more reserved in public and it was her usual demeanor. Anna was bubbly and is a social butterfly and it didn’t matter to her if she was showing her vulnerability to someone or not.
Elsa was a different story.
Many would expect them to hardly get along well, but the redhead knew her like the back of her hand.
And as her eyes read through the unsaid words and worries that reflected itself through the oceanic window pane of Elsa’s eyes, she recognized it too well. The worry which predominated the older’s ardent blue hues told Anna that she still hasn’t changed, even after all this time apart—she still can’t take things easy.
“When Claire came along, you didn’t take her in out of pity, did you?”
Elsa’s tears came to a halt.
“I took her in because I saw myself in her,” she admitted, “I’ve bent down, looked into her eyes and I only saw myself—orphaned, alone. And I didn’t want another innocent heart suffering a burden. We were both left with nothing...”
“I see. Then what part of you do you think chose to do that?”
Elsa gritted her teeth. Anna had always been the smarter one, in terms of verifying things involving emotions.
“Let’s face it, Els. Our heads had never been the one in control of what we want—it has always been what beats in here,” Anna pressed a trembling hand to her chest, “Your heart chose him. You didn’t ask for an Aiden Laurant—you didn’t ask for someone different. But you chose him. You want him.”
Elsa remained quiet, and her tears have gone dry.
“There are things beyond our control. Like how long we can resist before we can no longer deny you just want to spend the rest of your life with someone. We’re human, if you’re forgetting that.”
They stared down each other for a fervent moment, none of them uttering a word since they’re still trying to recover from the recent tide that the redhead just unleashed.
And then Elsa’s phone rang.
Steadying her shivering hand, Elsa looked at the caller ID and swallowed a ragged breath.
“Hello? Darling?”
Sniffling lowly, Elsa responded, “Oh, love. Goodness, I was surprised you called. What do you need?”
“Are you sick elskede? Your voice sounds like it.” Worry was etched in his tone.
“No, no, love, I’m fine. Now, do you need anything?”
“I-i, uh... Is Claire at home right now?”
“Yeah, she’s out playing in the snow with Kristoff at the moment.”
“Mind if I come over?”
Elsa’s lips cracked into a small smile, and at the corner of her eye she could’ve sworn she saw Anna jump out of her seat and break into a little celebratory dance in her favorite sweater.
“I hoped you would,” she teased.
“I miss you too,” He affectionately murmured, “I’ll be there in a few, I’m kind of helping mama with something right now. Tell Claire to be prepared for a tea party, I got brownies.”
Elsa chuckled. “She’s got you wrapped around her little finger.”
“Can’t say I’m not, she’s a pretty little lady. Must’ve gotten it from her mama.”
“Okay, okay, flatterer, I’ll see you later.”
“Okay. I’ll see you?”
“Mmh, yes. See you.”
Call Ended.
To be continued
on the next chapter...