hello to everyone starting this book!
this story will be updated on my own time whenever i can. i just wanted to publish it now because it's (winter) break still and i want to write as much as i can!
and btw, this is a highschool au story
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I feel the most alive
when I'm alone.
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Jung Wheein finds herself sitting under the large cherry blossom tree at the gate of the school, a spot where she normally seeks for her isolation to herself, since it something that she truly found to be fond of. She especially always had to carry her sketch journal, letting the breeze flow through the pinked leaves of the tree fall all around her. To Wheein, it was normal of her to remain to the side while she watched other students pour into the territory of her school𑁋RBW High𑁋in large groups together.
It felt peaceful just to be by herself𑁋the feeling of being alone with her own thoughts and her own vivid imaginations. She was able to define herself other than letting other people define who she is. And although sometimes she did really seek to enjoy the little moments with someone, right now, it was just by herself.
No one noticed her anyways, and that's okay.
Right?
She had always been the shy type ever since she was young. Her anxiety had been one of the main reasons as to why she's always been quiet and unnoticed. It wasn't that she didn't like to talk to people𑁋it's just that she found it hard to approach someone and to blatantly start a conversation with them. And since no one in her school chose to approach her at any point, she didn't bother to approach them either. She didn't mind being in the sidelines or alone; she felt more at home that way anyways.
Wheein shades in the final set of details on her sketchbook𑁋a simple drawing of the opposite cherry blossom tree that stood on the other side of where she sat𑁋narrowing her eyes down carefully to view the details of the tree. However at the corner of her eye, she notices something peculiar about the tree𑁋not the tree itself, since it just looks the same, but if she squeezes her eyes and focuses slowly, she could clearly see the outline of a figure who sat behind the tree. She couldn't get an exactly clear view, since she could only see their covered legs, but she smiles faintly before drawing in the miniscule detail on her drawing.
At least there was something different about the tree today, Wheein thinks to herself.
Before each school day, she had always been able to complete one drawing before going to class, though it's often mostly the same thing𑁋a tree. Don't be surprised if you find thousands of drawings of the same tree in her journal, though she has hoped many times to drawing more complicated visuals, such as a city, a garden, or maybe even... a person.
And as the bell rings out loudly, Wheein just continues to sit until she finishes up her drawing. It didn't take her long to finish before she scrambles her sketchbook back inside her backpack, shoving all of her neatly laid out drawing supplies in one of the pockets. She stands up quickly, brushing down her jeans and fixing the sleeves of her comfortable sweater. She adjusts the bangs out of her face as she leaves her desired spot, cowering her head low to avoid any sort of eye contact that was looking in her direction.
However, she just recalls something in her head as she glances back up, pausing in her spot to look back up at the cherry blossom tree that she just drew. Her eyes narrow in the direction of the tree, scanning for the figure that she remembered clearly seeing and inputting in her work. And to her dismay and the angle she was viewing in, she could see the figure at a more clearer view.
For some reason, she felt something jump inside of her, with the urge to approach the figure to tell them that school was beginning. However she resists, shaking her own head before continuing her way towards the school.
But she stops for a second time, and this time, the only thing that she could spot about the figure was their long, dark hair that draped on one side of their shoulder; a girl.
Wheein takes in the singular detail in her head𑁋though it can literally be anyone in her own school𑁋before walking inside the building by herself, clutching the strap of her backpack tighter with every step. She usually takes her steps slow to avoid being trapped in large crowds in the hallways, but this time, her steps were exceptionally slow. It was if she was waiting to see the girl at the tree walk inside the school just so she can see their face. But the slower she walked, she realised that she would be late for class.
She swiftly picks up at her pace towards her first class, mind still wandering about the girl under the tree.
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Wheein finds herself placed in the back of the classroom for her first class which happened to be English, a class that she mostly dreads for a variety of reasons. Those reasons seemed to continue to drag onto every single class she was enrolled in, except for her art class. It would constantly be the same thing every day𑁋mostly the same students just from how miniscule her school is, the same boring lectures, and the same people who constantly find new ways every day to start and spread drama and rumours throughout the school.
She hated naming names, so she chooses to ignore them, and she wondered as to why people find pleasure into degrading other people for no reason. The thought makes her aggressively click the pen in her hand loudly on her desk, to which the sound easily gets lost with the voices travelling throughout the classroom. The teacher wasn't there yet, which makes her sigh. She cups her forehead and bangs with her hand as if to shut out the voices in her head and around her, eyes frequently glancing from the door of the classroom, to the other students in the class who were all not in their properly assigned seats, and out the window which she received a clear view of the outside and front of the school. Everyone's desks were two-seaters, yet Wheein didn't have someone to sit next to, but she's been used to it ever since school started.
Her mind wanders as she props herself up slightly, seeing her reflection in the window made her immediately feel self-conscious yet she doesn't stop. She looks down towards the ground and in the direction of the tree that she sat at, smiling warmly to herself. Her eyes then travel towards the oppositely placed tree, the smile fading slowly from her face of the disappearance of the girl under the tree.
It did make sense though, since the girl under the tree was a student, but Wheein continuously thinks to herself if she will ever see that girl again. It could have been a one-time coincidence of seeing her, since she has never seen any other person sit under that tree other than the girl, yet something inside of Wheein that made her heart throb just to the thought of seeing her again, and she wasn't sure why.
Her eyes lay on a few students in her classroom, with the irony of most of them not knowing her name even though she memorised each students' name in her head. She found it somewhat amusing that they were all mostly separated in their own cliche stereotypical school groups𑁋the popular ones, the intelligent ones, the nerds, the athletic ones, and then there was just her.
There were of course more students that filled the groups than just her classroom, yet she was still by herself to her own thoughts, her own realities, her own company, and that was okay.
"They're here! They're here!" A loud voice rings throughout the class, rendering everyone to silence. Wheein raises her head up and directed her eyes towards the door, and as she releases a sigh of relief, her teacher walks inside the classroom, setting a stack of papers down on the table that was either homework, graded work and tests, assignments, or all of the above.
Her teacher, whose name is Mr. Kim, or in some cases, Kim Heechul, raises a hand up to gather all the attention from the students towards him. (lmao imagine how fun for heechul to teach an english class, that chaoticness i can already see.)
"Before we begin the class, I'd like to introduce the welcoming of a new student who is being enrolled here," he states loudly. Wheein could already hear the whispers of other students throughout the classroom, which makes her mentally shake her head. Whenever a new student would come to her school, they would always be the new talk of the program, and she hated that. "I would like for everyone to be on there best behaviour, alright? Miss Ahn, you can come in now."
And suddenly, all eyes switch towards the door. From where Wheein sat, she could clearly see a girl standing outside the classroom with her eyes directed to the floor. Wheein could already sense the harsh transfer of words throughout all of the students in her class, and it made her feel extremely nervous for the girl who was about to walk in.
But it was too late.
The girl steps her way inside of the classroom, hands and fingers laced together as her face held a merely faint smile. Wheein blinks a couple of times, feeling as though her eyes were permanently set on the girl. Her gaze outlines the girl's visual, admiring her beautiful dark and long silky hair, along with her unique features and bronze complexion. Wheein could only take in the girl's presence even though she was in the back of the classroom, watching as she pulls her head up to meet eyes with all of the students in the classroom.
Wheein overhears a couple of almost-quiet laughs, making her mentally glare in the direction of the source.
"Miss Ahn, would you like to introduce yourself to the class?" Heechul asks, snapping the dark-haired girl out of her thoughts.
"Um," the dark-haired girl murmurs, feeling her own throat becoming scratchy just from saying that word. Wheein only continues to stare towards the girl, in a way that wasn't like her other classmates' gazes, but in a way that somehow brings up her confidence slightly. "My name is, uh, Ahn Hyejin."
Ahn Hyejin. Wheein takes a mental note of the girl's name in her head, putting it with all the rest of her memorised names of her classmates, but this time it was placed in a much more farther place in her head.
Hyejin stands completely still in the front of the classroom, hands shaking furiously. She could sense all of her classmates' eyes on her, and all of their gazes sent a chill up and down her spine. What happened to all of that confidence she had prepared before she walked through the doors of the school? She felt as if she had been rehearsing it a million times already, but this time, it was real, and she didn't know what to do or how to even move.
"Is there anything else, Miss Ahn?"
Hyejin faces towards the teacher𑁋who she just learned to be named Heechul𑁋shaking her head to his question.
Heechul gives a brief smile before continuing, "Alright, okay. There should be a spare seat near, let's see..." He glances in the direction of Wheein, who quickly hides her face away from view. "Jung Wheein. There is an empty seat next to her."
All eyes suddenly face on Wheein, who immediately melts into her seat, secretly hoping that she could just fall through the floor. She quickly became overwhelmed from the stares of her classmates as she couldn't bare to look up from her eyes being lasered through her own desk, heart racing to an exceeding amount. She had always been wondered to the feeling of being noticed, but not in this way𑁋not in a way that gives her the feeling that she's somehow floating and out of her own reality, not in a way that makes her want to just implode right then and there.
She hears some footsteps towards heading in her direction before feeling the warming presence of the dark-haired girl𑁋Ahn Hyejin𑁋next to her. Hyejin places herself in the seat, quickly placing her bags down on the floor before briefly looking up at Wheein, a shy smile on her face.
Though Wheein expected a greeting from the girl, Hyejin turns her body to face forward to the front of the classroom, the smile quickly leaving her face and being replaced with a nervous expression. Wheein notices it immediately, feeling her chest tighten from the closeness of the girl. And as she observes the girl's features a bit more, taking it in a bit more within her system, her mind goes back to the cherry blossom tree, seeing the long dark hair that was the same as Hyejin's. Now that the girl was closer to her, she could silently admire the details of her, just like she does with almost everything around her.
However, the mood is quickly lowered as at the corner of Wheein's eyes, she could see a group of girls at the opposite side of the classroom. She narrows her eyes, gazing past Hyejin and towards the group who were all sneaking snide remarks in her direction, whispering amongst each other and indirectly pointing her way.
Wheein could feel the angering flames fume inside of her, but her expression steadies from how tense Hyejin looked right next to her, and how the girl was glancing in the same direction of the group of girls that Wheein was looking at. And for some reason, something inside of Wheein made her believe that they were all talking about Hyejin, or her, or possibly even the both of them.
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i hope i get the motivation to actually write this
wheein is a wallflower <3