My Dearest Warlock

Matchmaker

"Metatron, watch my kids while I'm gone. This time, don't leave them unsupervised to start the Apocalynope," said the voice of God.

God stepped out, taking a female human form. They looked to be fifteen at the oldest, which was oddly strange that God would pick to be a teenager. Dark black hair was cut into a pixel cut, which was another odd choice for God, considering that God had always been pictured with long, golden blond hair. Their skin was a light tan in color, which made their dark brown eyes look all that more beautiful. A long, loosing fitting white dress adorned their body, giving God the look of a humanized Angel.

It was like God wanted to say, "Screw everyone who painted me as an old white man in nice silk robes."

"Of course," said Metatron slowly, looking God over one last time. "What may I call you, my Lord?"

"You can call me Juanita[1]." God whirled around, facing Metatron one last time. "Also, since I'm currently female, say Lady. I really like that actually... I might stick with that one permanently. Oh, this is so very exciting."

Metatron looked like he was being to regret being appointed to his role as God's... well, second-in-command. Sorta, kinda second-in-command. It was a complicated ordeal- it would require a lot of graphs, data, strange pictures, and needless accounts from stuck-up Angels. "Yes, my Lady."

~

Adam walked along side Dog silently, almost as if he were upset or angry- his dad did the same thing when he was angry, minus the walking part. However, he was neither upset or angry, but rather curious. While his physical body was on the mortal plane, his mind wandered adrift, far too lost in space to be quick functioning.

Why do ducks exist? Why am I alive? Who is Gadreel? If I had a set of wings, what would they look like, and what color would they be? Will I get married? If I do get married, who will I marry? Why isn't Pluto considered a planet by the mean NASA people? If I try to turn someone into a goose, could it work? Why are aliens call aliens and not 'spacelings'? Do guardian angels actually watch over people? Do demons have humans they watch over? Do soulmates really exist? Are girls actually werewolves?

It was needless to say that Adam was curious, just like his namesake. Given, Adam didn't take a bite from the Forbidden Fruit, but that's not the point. The point was that, simply speaking, Adam craved knowledge. He didn't want world domination; he wanted to understand Heaven, Hell, Angels/Nephilim, Demons, and whatever Purgatory was- if it existed, of course. He didn't want that knowledge to corrupt the world but rather to help.

Now, God was very curious about their grandson and creation- sorta creation. He was deemed the Antichrist, only due to the fact that Satan was his father. Had it been Gabriel or Micheal or nearly any other Angel, Adam would have just been classified as a Nephilim- which was a violation, not to be fooled. However, the Antichrist was bound to this notation that they would be evil, no matter where born in the timeline or who raised them.

Adam was a sort of mystery to nearly everyone. Great prophecies and writing from those deemed mad and insane had come to pass with practically no side downsides. All the plans, carefully constructed by Angels and demons alike, had fallen apart like a row dominos that just got hit with a small rubber ball. It was almost needless to say that Gabriel had been brooding every since, to the point that God considered flicking him onto another planet.

Regardless, no one knew of the boy's true intentions, which brought practically no one comfort at all. Even if he had denied his fate of ending the world and destroyed nearly everything, no one knew what he was going to do next. It was like an unpredictable mystery story written in three outdated languages, all of which had secret codes that only three dead people knew and could understand. Now, one could simple replace the mystery story with the Antichrist, the three outdated languages with Angels, demons, and humans, the secret codes with the boy's thoughts and the dead people part with what the future held for the boy. This would read: