Built From Ash - Sequel to Burned Out

Chapter 5: Setback

    The next few days were typical, well, as typical as they could be. Skeppy had offered to let Sapnap stay at his house for a while, and Sapnap had taken him up on the offer. Skeppy was glad, at least he wouldn't be alone when the nightmares struck.

    They had started off switching every day between who used Skeppy's PC, but after a couple days, it'd gotten old. Sapnap had gone to retrieve his own setup, which was only about three hours away. In short time he was gone, Skeppy acquired another letter from Bad.

    When he saw it, his head started spinning, and he felt like he would vomit. He sat down with his head in between his knees, resting his hands and back on the cool tile and wall.

    He placed the envelope, unopened, on the island, figuring he would wait until Sapnap got back to open it.

    He got half an intro of a video done before he felt an overwhelming exhaustion sweep over him. It wasn't necessarily a physical tiredness, he was more mentally tired than anything, and he found himself wishing for Bad. For neither the first nor last time, he wanted his old friend back.

    He felt as though he would never be able to love anyone the way he'd loved Bad; what if they were just torn away? Somewhere deep in his mind, he knew he'd never heal completely, but he would try.

    He lay on his bed, not feeling motivation to do anything, not even move. When would this feeling go away? Ever? Would he just get these random bursts of motivation before hours of feeling numb?

    Maybe he shouldn't wait for Sapnap to get back. Hadn't he seen the way Sapnap reacted when he mentioned the first letter? It would just hurt him more.

    With what seemed like an absurd amount of effort, Skeppy went to get the letter and brought it back to his room.

    There was a satisfying tear as he opened the envelope. The paper crinkled slightly when hu pulled it out and unfolded it. He braced himself, and dove into the writing.

Dear Skeppy,
It's been a week, but it's felt like so much longer. I hate it in here. I just wish there was someone I could talk to. Good is gone. I mean, I know he can't actually be gone, he's just a figment of my imagination, but even when he was silent, I could always feel him, and now that feeling is completely gone. If I'm being honest, it really scares me. And it kind of felt nice, to know someone was enduring the torture with me. They gave me a book. It's not the best, literally just a copy of the Constitution, but I found a paper that someone must've slipped into the pages. It was this stupid sounding 'spell' that allows you to communicate with people while they're asleep. I know it's nothing, but I'll try anyway. Who knows, maybe you'll see me soon. Do you know what happened to Rat? I hope she's okay. If you can, try to find her and take care of her. It would mean a lot to me. And it's like you'll have a piece of me with you! And how's Sapnap doing? I feel horrible, but that doesn't make up for what I did. I just hope he knows I didn't want to. Tell him I miss him. Sometimes I sing to myself. I know, abrupt change of topic. People tell me they hate that, but it just happens. Anyway, when I feel really lonely, or if I get really bored, I sing to myself. I go in the corner of my room and lean on the wall and sing my favorite songs, or sometimes I make up my own. They said if I'm on good behavior for the next few months I can have a guitar. I don't know if they're telling the truth or if they just wanted me to shut up because it was late. I feel like nothing will come of it, but it gives me something to look forward to. They say I'm never getting out of here, but I might be able to have a roommate in the second half of my life. If you can even call it living.  Maybe I deserve it. Oh, they said I only have another couple minutes until they take the pen back. I miss you, remember, don't shut down.
                      -Sincerely, Bad