Must Date The Chef

|| 48.

The thought of being with other men leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, I banish it to the back of my mind and close my eyes to allow the images of the people I saw upstairs pass. I try not to think of their position or the fact they were alone in the room. To convince myself there is nothing intimate about him having his hands around her wrists. But her giggles float in my head, taunting and teasing as they ring in my ears with grit.

"What will you eat?" Chi's voice penetrates my messy thoughts. My eyes fly open to see her push an empty plate in front of me.

The seat at the head of the table is empty, same with some chairs by the right of it. This is the oddest party I have attended, the host and celebrant are missing but no one seems to care. The faint music playing in the background changes to a traditional tune, cheers of approval fill the air and their heads bob in rhythm for a short while until they return to their conversation.

"Pauline." My head jerks to Chi, she frowns and I offer her a small smile which causes her to sigh. She is tired of me, I am tired of me too, I want to go home. Touching the empty plate with a fork, she murmurs, "I was talking about food. What will you eat?"

"Who cooked?" I ask instead.

An emotion flashes across her face which pales, she levels me a gaze, I grimace and blink slowly. "Don't know but it's not Paul."

Her answer disappoints me, sadness tickles me for a split second. A heaviness descends on me, I straighten up and trail the lock on my purse. It would have been nice to eat his meal one last time before leaving. This whole thing is messing with me, if only I can find the control for my feelings to shut them off. I should at least try to move on too, he has done that but I am stuck here.

Where do we stand now? I sigh. One thing is for sure, after that fiasco I saw upstairs, I am standing on my own. Chi takes a bite from the plate of funny looking sauce in front of her and moans in satisfaction. My eyes widen in recognition of the meal named after me, I purse my lips and my shoulders sag. We will never get a chance to properly celebrate his win or the special.

Chi nudges me with her elbow as if to ask if I have decided on a meal yet. I shake my head. I don't feel hungry, if I did before, my appetite flew out the window the moment I saw those two together. Does he like her as much as he does--did me? My heart skips a beat, I wonder if he calls her love or touches her with the same gentleness he does when we makeout and a soft sigh escapes me.

Torturing myself with images of them in intimate positions, I shift in my seat and my eyelids flutter as visions assault me. Him on top of her, hands intertwined above her head as both of them kiss before they break apart to let her fingers weave through his beards. Does she also give him forehead kisses like I do? Tears sting my eyes, I place a hand over my chest, right above my calm heart. It hurts too much to think about them but I can't stop. He moved on without me.

"Pauline," Chi says through gritted teeth, "I-"

"I'm not hungry," I cut her off and direct my gaze to her plate, she is almost done eating.

A long hiss follows my reply, she motions for a passing waiter who she instructs to stuff my plate with jollof rice. By the time the waiter takes her leave, my plate is filled with more fried meat and plantain than actual food, just how Paul likes to serve me. It's the only way he can get me to eat in large quantities, meat always does the trick. He will start by seducing me with meat, then add spoonfuls later until I have eaten more than I thought possible for my belly.

"If you don't eat," she states, "I'll call Paul."

Speaking of the devil, my brown-eyed devil, he walks into the dining hall with Evil in tow to stand behind an empty seat and all conversation ceases. I tune him out as his lips start moving, my eyes zeroed in on his partner, trying to find a fault in her overly flawless appearance. My gaze lands on her tiny hand wrapped around his arm, I scoff.