𝔑𝔬𝔳𝔞
(Finally! I finally published this:3)
וווווו×
Outer's POV
Killer and I were chatting about random topics. He had been my friend a few years now but.. a friend isn't what I looked at him. He is my crush. I've been planning to confess ever since but everytime I was about to, something or someone would interrupt. And I'm planning to confess right now. I hope nothing interruptts us.
"...And I said 'It was a Killer'."
I laughed at the pun and wiped a tear from eye. "Hey Killz, there's something I need to tell ya." I said as I finally recovered from all the laughing.
"Hm? What is it? Is it one of your best Sansational jokes?~" Killer joked. I giggled again but it died down quickly, wanting to confess now. Sweat started to form on my skull and Killer noticed. "Hey, you alright bud?"
I sighed and then faced him with a serious look. "Killer I want– I lo– ..." I couldn't seem to let out the words. My soul was beating rapidly and my mind kept arguing with me. What if he denied? What if he doesn't like me back? What if after I confess, he'll never want to see me again? What if—. I snapped back to reality when someone was calling out Killer's name.
"Killer!"
It was Nightmare.
I swear I noticed Killer had a small tint of red spreading across his cheeks and then quickly disappeared. One more thing, Killer has a crush on Nightmare. There's a bigger chance that he'll deny my confession. "Oh hey Nighty!" Killer greeted. I got jealous over the nickname, I wish he calls me a nickname too.
"Break time is over." Nightmare blankly stated.
"Aww.. only five more hours please?.." Killer used his puppy eyes so he could spend more time with me, which made me a little happy.
"No. And there's something important I need to discuss with you with." I watched Nightmare avert his gaze from Killer and blush neon. I knew there's something bad gonna happen. "Fine. See ya next time Outer." Killer stood up and went with Nightmare. "C'ya." I sighed and decided to stay there a bit and have some me time.
A few minutes later, I heard some squealing and someone tackled me into a hug. "K-Killer??! What's up?" I blushed at the current position were in. He was currently on top me while I laid flat on my back.
"He confessed to me!!! Nightmare confessed to me, Outer! He likes me all along. I'm so happy." Killer hugged me with the 'exciting' news, and my smile dropped. I felt my soul shattered like a thousand peices. I was too slow. He's finally taken. "I'm.. happy for you too Killz." Killer pulled apart from the hug which made me feel somehow cold. "I should tell Color!" He exclaimed, clearly happy of what happened. "See you later!" Then he left me, alone, again.
I sat up and processed what Killer had just said. I didn't even get to confess to him... I buried my face to my knees and silently cried.
After some time...
It's been 9 months since Killer got into a relationship and it's been 9 months since Killer hasn't visited me yet. I stared at my phone, thinking if I should call him or not. After a few minutes, I finally decided to call him. The phone rang 4 times before the phone was answered.
K: Oh hey, Outer. Sorry I haven't visited you. What's up?
O: Nothing much. I was just wondering if when you'll visit me.
K: Oh, sorry Outer. Maybe next time. Right now, me and Nighty just came home from shopping.
O: Oh... ok. See ya then.
I ended the call before Killer could make another word and then I flopped myself onto my bed. I sighed, still not moving on and still feeling heart broken. A tear slid out from my left eye socket and realized that I was about to cry. I wiped the year away, not wanting to disturb my brother's sleep from my crying.
11: 10
It's been 5 hours since I called Killer but still couldn't get him off my mind. I shifted my position and tried to sleep but the thought of him still lingered in me. I miss his warm embrace, I miss smile, I miss his laughter, I miss his punny jokes, I miss everything about him. I miss him.
I decided to take walk outside since I couldn't sleep. I grabbed my hoodie and and went to the spot where Killer and I always hang out. When I saw the place, memories flooded through my skull. I sat down at the edge and looked at the starry atmosphere. We used to tell a lot puns at nighttime and tried our best to keep quiet, which is, quite impossible. The silence isn't so bad until I looked at my hands and feel sad because the spaces between my fingers are right where his fingers fits perfectly.
I can't remember the last time I slept, everybody is even worried for me, but I tell them that it's only insomnia and nothing new. "Or because cold nostalgia chills me to the bone." I chuckled at the pun I made, Killer would have laugh his ass off. I pouted, remembering that Killer isn't here. But waist deep in thought because when I think of him I don't feel so alone. As many times as I blink, I'll think of him tonight.
I should move on. Killer is finally happy. If he's happy, I'm happy. I managed to make a smile, a happy one. I'll forget the world that I knew but I swear I won't forget him. I won't forget Killer. If only, if only my voice could reach back through the past, I'd whisper in his ear and tell him that I wish he were here with me.
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Hoi!:3
Nova ship I wuv you *pets Outer*
I was inspired to make this by a little help from the song "Vanilla Twilight" by Owl City. That explains there are some lyrics in there:D
- Vivi
