Secrets Until Someday

Chapter 24

Sydney's POV

Sitting here looking at Brooks I feel such anger towards his dad I could explode. Brooks explained the entire conversation his dad and he had that night. He explained to me how scared he was that he was going to lose his family over me and how he wasn't prepared for that. As much as it still hurt I understood. It eased some of the anger I held against him for all this time never fully understanding what actually happened and feeling like he had used me to get what he wanted. I wish he would have called me, I wish he would have said something and all of this could have gotten cleared up so long ago.

    "Why didn't you call me and just tell me?" I ask.

    "I knew if I talked to you, even over the phone I wouldn't be able to walk away. I knew I would pick you and I was scared. I didn't know if this was really worth that and I wasn't ready. So I bolted. I stayed away for the last year and a half avoiding you and this. I don't even think I realized how hard I was running from it until I saw you and how angry you were with me. It was like I blocked all of those feelings out of my memory. I told myself I was doing what I had to do because of what my parents expected out of me" He confesses.

    I reach over and lift his chin up so that he is looking at me. "I forgive you," I say and place a kiss on his lips.

    At that moment I knew I had to give him my forgiveness because my anger had been largely misplaced. I couldn't believe that his dad put him in that position because he didn't approve of me, how could someone do that to their kid? And how vindictive do you have to be to make up the lie he told me about Brooks having a girlfriend? He already knew Brooks ended it so why twist the knife even further?

    "Really?" He looks at me with pleading eyes. "I'm so sorry for hurting you, I promise I never had a girlfriend, I wouldn't have done that to you Sydney." He reassures me. "I can't believe my dad would have said that to you. I'm so pissed and so confused, I mean how did it even come up that I had a girlfriend? It doesn't make sense. Are you sure that's what he said, I don't know why he would be so cruel?"

  Irritation flows through my veins that he doubts the lengths his dad would go to or that he thinks I would misunderstand something that me such heartbreak after the fact.

"I'm sure," I say sternly pulling my eyes away from his. "After that night I never heard from you once you got home, and then the next day nothing...so I came to your house, I knew something was up and I felt like you were ghosting me after we slept together and so your dad answered the door." I continued my revelation about the conversation that took place.

"Thinking about it now it makes sense, the way he looked at me, he knew why I was really there." Brooks nods at me to continue, "he told me you left. That you went back to school for an internship so you could be close to your girlfriend for the summer." I nearly choked on the sadness coming out of me with the words. "Trust me, that's a conversation I'll never forget." 

I can't help but wonder what I ever did for Mr. Dawson to dislike me so much. I was a kid and he intentionally created this story to cause me pain. Because I was a smart ass? Because I didn't follow his lace-lined rule book for what it meant to be a proper lady? It feels so unfair to be judged so harshly for being myself. 

    "I'm so sorry. My dad is pretty used to getting what he wants, but I just don't understand why he was so against this." Brooks is holding his hand against my cheek and rubs away the tears I didn't realize were falling from my eyes.

    "I just...I thought...I just thought you completely used me" I choke out through the tears.

    "I'm gonna fix this Syd. I promise. Please just trust me, I wouldn't have done that to you." his words comforting me over and over.