delicate - rini au (sequel)

chapter 28: how to feel after being gone

The picnic was amazing, they spent around 5 hours together, talking and catching up. It was the first time in so long that all of them were together. Well, not all of them, but we'll get to that later. Ricky told them everything that has happened during shooting, everything. Thank god that park was empty, because people would have loved to hear all about Maya and him, Jaz and Liam. No one was surprised about it, it's kinda obvious that 4 young people would get bored and needy if they were left alone in the middle of nowhere. All of them told Ricky what he had missed. Seb and Carlos explained how they got engaged, even if Ricky already knew because Seb made sure he would know before he left. Ashlyn and Kourt explained what was like to live together. Red was excited about his channel hitting a million subscribers. E.J. told stupid stories about the drama in the series, no one understanding because, not even E.J. himself, were watching the show at all.
Ricky missed them a lot, he couldn't explain the happiness he was feeling while listening to Carlos and E.J. argue about some random Love Island episode. They have been friends for so many years, no one would have ever thought they would stay this close after high school, but somehow they did. Now, he was getting back to his house, after so many months he actually was home. Everything felt nostalgic, unknown. The first thing he did was laying in bed, so comfortable, feeling how it was asking him to take a nap on it. Avoiding that voice in his head saying that he needed to do other stuff, he took off his jacket and got between the sheets. He exhaled, and without realizing, he fell asleep. A nap ended up sleeping until 5AM, but he didn't regret it, he was tired as hell and needed to actually rest. His first thought was to curse because the time difference was going to kick his ass this first week back. He took a shower, grabbed some of the leftovers of the picnic that Ashlyn insisted he take home, because he didn't have any food and he needed to eat. He laid on the couch and decided it was time to talk with his manager and his team. His phone was still broken but he had a back up one just in case. He charged it and saw the thousands of texts from Benjamin. He started to read them all, turns out his manager would text every update, every new, everything as if he was there. He read the messages and his anxiety and anger filled his body. He knew he had to talk with Nini and tell the world the truth, but how? He didn't know how to even look at her after 6 months of being away, plus all the hate she received for his mistakes. Gina hated her because of him. It was his fault, and he knew it. He opened twitter and searched his name. It was 8AM when he checked the time again. It was not a good idea to check twitter, his fans were kind of upset and mad at him, not for leaving or dating Nini. They were mad because she wasn't at the picnic, and she was still getting hate. He opened his chat with her, seeing all the messages. Tears were streaming down his face, he felt guilty. She used to text him every day, she even texted him when she went out on a date with some Ryan, who he read that talked shit about her. She stopped at some point, and then she started again. The last text was from the day everything went downhill.

"I wish you were here. It's hard to deal with this on my own. Part of me wants to hate you for leaving, but part of me wants you here, to hold me and tell me that it'll be fine. I'm going to rest alone for a while. I'm sorry for not picking you up from the airport, I know that I will break down if I see you. I'm turning off my phone, only E.J. knows where I am. Come when you are rested, we have to figure so much shit out."