Secrets (wolfstar)

Part Eighteen

"Yeah" and then she interlaced their fingers "we gotta sell it"

He nodded and the two headed up the castle. He wonder if holding hands should make him feel something. He guessed it would, he wasn't unrealistic, he didn't think the whole world would collapse and butterflies would shot out his ass cause he was holding hands with someone, but he thought it might make him feel something, anything. He guessed it's cause he didn't like Lucy in that way. But with another girl he would. You felt something when Remus held your hand, a small voice in the back of his mind muttered but he pushed it away. That had been momentary, Remus had taken his hand briefly as they walked back to Gryffindor tower after their evening on the astronomy tower. When Remus larger hand incased his, their fingers sliding together, and Remus had squeezed Sirius' hand, Sirius had blushed, and felt a warm nervous yet happy feeling in his gut. But that was all the circumstance Sirius told himself, they'd been out messing around it was late, he was just feeling exhaustion and excitement.

They walked into the great hall but it was mostly empty. A first year Hufflepuff was walking towards the dungeon, and two Ravenclaw girls with Brooms under their arms heading out to play Quidditch. So their show was for nothing. They dropped hands immediately, and said a quick and pretty lifeless goodbye to each other.

Sirius headed back up to the Gryffindor tower, trying his best to keep his own thoughts out of his head. When he entered the common room, he saw his friends gathered around the fire, James, and Peter seemed to be enchanting pieces of paper to fly at Remus head. Remus, who was sitting in a seat closest to the fire a book in his lap, and his legs hanging over one arm rest, was batting them away with an air of annoyance but fondness that was signature Remus. When Sirius walked over James stopped immediately and jumped up and turned to him.

"How'd it go?" He asked "you snogged? Or does she hate you that would be so funny!"

"No one could ever hate me Prongs, have you seen my hair" Sirius said sitting down in between James and Peter and shoving them both a little so he could fit.

"There is a another chair over there." Peter grumbled.

"Aw but you'd miss me too much Wormy" Sirius said reaching over and squeezing his cheeks only to be slapped across the hand quite hard "hey no hitting we taught you better than that."

"No Padfoot that's exactly what we told him to do" James said, Sirius couldnt help but glance over at Remus and see he had gone back to his book now flying paper had stopped, but Sirius knew he was listening and not actually listening. Whenever Remus was actually reading he furrowed his brow just a little in concentration, and now it was flat and smooth.

"Oh yeah, good job Pete." He said patting his head.

"So tell us what happened?" James said bringing the conversation back to his "date".

"What do you wanna know, we walked, we talked, we defeated a stray giant who wandered on to the grounds and was torturing first years" Sirius said.

"Really?" Peter said excitedly but Sirius just looked at him in a prolonged sorta way "ohhh"

"But it was good. She obviously super pretty and smart" Sirius was interrupted by Remus suddenly getting up, everyone turned to look at him and suddenly he looked like a a deer in head lights.

"What you up to Moony?" James said looking concerned.

"I've gotta go to the library. Need to finish the potions essay." Remus said as he gathered his bag.

"You already finish the potions essay mate." Peter said holding up a piece of paper "I'm copying it now"

Remus snatched it out of Peter's hand.

"When did you even take this?" Remus said shoving the piece of paper in his bag.

"When you were in the washroom, but you definitely finished it. I checked. Didn't want to get half way through and half to give it back and then take it again. Peter said.

"I just realized I made a mistake." Remus said he started to head towards the door, but Peter jumped up and followed him yelling questions about where the mistake was, and how to fix it.

"So the date was good?" James asked.

"Yup." Sirius replied very ready for any other  conversation topic.

"Okay so what the fuck is going on with Remus?" James said and Sirius had to grab the side of the couch so he didn't fall off in shock.

"What me and Remus aren't doing anything why would you say that." Sirius said scooting to the other end of the couch.

"Yeah, wait what. I was talking about how sad and weird Moony has beeen, and he is hanging out with Lukas what the fuck is up with that?" James said. "What were you talking about?"

"Nothing, I was just we are, planning a prank, I'll tell you details later. What do you mean sad and weird?" Sirius tried to recover, James looked sceptical but didn't say anything.

"One how dare you plan a prank with out me, we are officially no longer mates. Two, I don't know he seems to wander off on his own a lot, and when he is with us he isn't really, you know. Like his minds gone. Do you think it's that Lukas bloke again. Like maybe they started dating again and he is being an asshole to Moony making him feel bad. I'll kill him if thats it, then I'll kill Remus for going back to him, then I'll kill us for not noticing or stopping it earlier." He said. Sirius was taken a back with the genuine concern James seemed to be harbouring. He knew James was a good friend, he'd always been a good friend to Sirius at least, but their friendship was mostly jokes, and quidditch. Like yes Sirius leaving his family had been hard, but the laughter James gave him was the support he needed, this was different.

"I don't think that's it." Lily Evans said sitting in the chair that had been previously occupied by Remus "sorry for Eavesdropping."

"No it's fine, I eavesdrop on you all the time." James said in a ridiculous attempt at welcoming Lily to the conversation but when she just raised her eye brows he added "I just mean you can join any conversation I am having ever, like please do, all of them, for the rest of my life."

"Nice save." Sirius said sarcastically under his breath.

"So Remus" she said clearly redirecting the conversation "I agree something is wrong but I actually don't think it's Lukas"

She looked at Sirius, and Sirius knew why. In fact they both knew why Remus was sad. Or at least they suspected. For a moment he was worried she was about to give away his secret as well as Remus'. But she didn't she just said,

"I guess we all just support him, in our own way."

"I agree with Lily." James said immediately.

"You always agree with Lily" Sirius grumbled.

"Yeah it's cause I'm always right."