Gangland 2 [L.T.]

Letters

Letters
[let-erz]

1. A written or printed note to someone

******************************
Songs for the chapter:
Sleeping at last - Turning Pages
I'll keep your memory vague - Finger Eleven
***************************

The kiss ends due to lack of oxygen, both Louis and I gasp for air.

I open my eyes to see a smiling Louis. My eyes widen, I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have given in and kissed his perfect lips.

He sighs, "I needed that."

"Needed what?" I question

"The reassurance that you still have feelings for me."

"Who said I still had feelings for you?" I lie

Of course I still have feelings for this conniving gang leader.

Louis scoffs, "You don't kiss someone that you don't have feelings for like that."

"Like what?"

"Like whatever that was." Louis laughs, I laugh along. But the feeling of laughter is foreign to me, I have barley even smiled in the last 18 days let alone laughed.

Louis turns serious, "What are we now?"

I shrug my shoulders, "I don't know."

I want to be with Louis, I really fucking do, but I can't handle this back and forth shit.

"Can you come back?" He asks quietly

I run my fingers through my hair, "I don't know..."

"Goddamnit Harley. You know you want to be with me just as much as I want to be with you." He raises his voice

"Of course I want to be with you Louis but I can't! I can't handle you always fighting with me! I almost fucking relapsed today because I thought that there was no other way to forget about you. And then you just show up and expect me to come back." I yell back

"Yes Harley, I do expect you to come back! We're both just going to get worse and worse until we're together!" Louis stands from his seat

I look down at my hands, what the hell am I going to do.

"I think that we need to think about this for a couple more days." I gulp

Louis nods his head, but not in an understanding way. In a
fuck-you-right-now kind of way.

I close my eyes as Louis stomps out the front door, slamming it shut behind him.

I start to sob once again, shit stop fucking crying.

"Damnit!" I scream

I pick up the empty bottle of vodka, throwing it against the white wall. It shatters instantly.

With the little energy that my malnourished body carries, I run up to Tony's room. I sob even harder at the sight of it, at the smell of it.

I lie down in his fluffy bed, enveloping myself in his blankets that smell just like him. Goddamnit I could use a Tony hug right now. Or just some advice from him. Something.

My eyes travel to a small box on top of his desk, I can see that it's labeled 'Harley (Lee Lee)'

I stand up, grabbing the box before sitting back down on Tony's bed. My tears have ceased, for the time being.