Wayward ➳ Edward Cullen

9. Natures

Spine stiffening, I grit my teeth. I felt the shift of my clothes against my skin as my muscles tensed. For the first time, I noticed the mile markers passing my window. "You should be," I said, my voice darkening as I thought of the machete in my room.

"We've run across hunters before," he revealed.

A chill ran up the back of my neck, all the way to my prickling scalp. "Did you kill them?"

"My family doesn't kill," he claimed. "We leave."

I turned to the passenger window, staring out at the signs passing by. "Why haven't you left, then?"

Edward was quiet for a moment. "I said I was staying," he said, soft and carefully worded, as if it was an admission. "They've decided to stay with me as long as they can."

"You're staying for me?" I had to be sure I understood this right.

Edward's eyes sought out mine and held them. "I feel very protective of you."

My nerves tingled as a warmth spread throughout my limbs that had nothing to do with the heater. "Because of my blood."

Edward's lips pressed together, brows knitting as he leaned his head away and put his narrowed eyes back on the road. "No." A moment later, he amended, "Not entirely."

This back and forth about my blood confused me. "I don't understand, Edward. Do you want to kill me or not?"

"No!" He insisted, face contorting into pain. Gritting his teeth, he added in a strained voice, "But I am what I am." His hands tightened on the wheel. "I can't trust myself."

I curled my hands into fists. "And what are you, Edward?" I asked softly.

He stared at the road. "You know what I am."

"I thought you couldn't read my mind."

His smile was self-deprecating. "I don't need to. You've seen enough."

The crinkle of the plastic bag around my books as I gripped them tight was the only thing interrupting the silence. "Vampire."

"Are you afraid?" he asked.

He had to hear the pounding of my heart. "Yes."

"Good."

The silence was deafening. It was so absolute I could hear the pounding of my pulse in my ears. "You say your family doesn't kill. How do you survive?"

"We feed on animals." Edward's mouth curled at the corner. "We call ourselves vegetarians. Our private joke."

"And that makes you safe?" I wondered.

Edward's brows lowered. "We're never entirely safe. The craving is always there."

Did I dare believe him? I stared out the window, trying to process all he'd told me. He thirsted for my blood but wanted to protect me. He drank animals instead of people. But that didn't make them any less dangerous.

But was Edward, or one of his family, responsible for the murdered man? Did he sate his bloodlust somewhere else? Or had one of the other Cullens fallen off the wagon.

"Why hunt animals at all?" I wondered aloud.

"I don't want to be a monster."

There was a world of longing behind his words. I couldn't help but want the same for him, too.

But he was a monster. One who even admitted to wanting my blood.

Yet, Edward wasn't just some creature—some evil thing. He had saved me, twice. He was intelligent and clearly loved his family. He wanted to be better than the beast his dark impulses tried to make him into.