I Hope the Worst Isn't Over ✔️

Chapter Three

He recalled this old pain as he turned back to the fire, black curls falling down over his dimly lit face. He let out a huff, running a hand across his cheek to feel the dry skin below his fingertips. He wanted to be done thinking about it, all of it, but his own afflictions prodded around in his mind as well. At least he could rattle those off without any of the confusion that came with trying to remember whatever the hell caused white hair to pop up randomly. Everyone had a feature they grew up hating, and for him, it was a birthmark. A port-wine stain that covered the left side of his face, patterning itself down his body, over his shoulder, and down his arm. He remembered the relentless bullying he used to receive for it, and how people called him such unclever, albeit still rather hurtful, names. He'd always been told by his family that he should consider himself lucky it never worsened-- lucky that it never became horribly swollen or disfiguring like it did for some. Janus figured that maybe, he was somewhat lucky for that after all, even if the mark did cause the affected area to be uncomfortably dry, and if its lack of treatment throughout his young life led to other issues. The worst of which, in his opinion, was most certainly the increased optical pressure from the mark's placement over his eye. That's called a glaucoma, they'd said, and although it only caused mild visual impairment back when he had access to medication, the end of the world allowed it to progress freely. Slowly but surely, he was left in his current state, practically fucking blind in one eye. Sure, it could make out the fact there was a light source in front of him, but nothing more. Janus could only thank his lucky stars that his other eye remained healthy, granting him mostly normal vision if not for the frustrating lack of depth perception.

"Hey, Dee?" Remus asked, crawling over the log and finally sitting down normally beside Janus, pulling the man from his thoughts in the process.

"Yes?" 

"You're caught up in your own head again."

Janus shrugged, staying quiet with nothing to say. He pressed his teeth into his tongue, rolling the two halves around in his mouth. He'd gotten it split when he finished highschool, a body modification he enjoyed using to scare the people who called him a snake. Lying, curel, and stuck half way through shedding its skin, they'd say. He used to find their reactions hilarious when he took their insults and ran with them as if they were nothing.

Remus sighed and poked his friend's shoulder, "You know what I've been caught up about?"

"What is it?" Janus asked, "and I swear if you make another bondage joke I will-"

"Not that," he chuckled, "I mean, I wish, but not that. I've been thinking about Virgil."

Immediately, anxiety settled into the air, and Janus felt his form stiffen. Remus, however, went on nonetheless, rarely being one to bother reading the room. "What do you think the odds are that he's okay? I mean, I know realistically they can't be great, but I like to assume there's a chance, don't you?"

Janus turned to look at the other man, debating his words before speaking, "I don't know, Reem. We left him with the bag, helped him hide, it's always possible."

The brunet nodded and yawned, stretching out his arms and laying on Janus, "That's vague, I can see you're just trying to reassure me. I don't enjoy the image of those zombies tearing him apart either, but you could make your responses realistic. I hate when you baby me."

Janus sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, "One last request then, how about you just rest until dinner is done? You're obviously tired."

"Fine…" he mumbled, settling in and closing his eyes without dispute for once.

Janus watched as Remus fell asleep, how his buried tension faded away, and how his breathing evened out. Janus was tired too, but by now it was more of an emotional exhaustion than a physical one. The world in this day in age was draining, and what happened to Virgil still took its toll on him. He knew it always would, and he could still remember what happened as if it were yesterday...