Chapter 23

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Maja had been full of apologies as she had told me that she couldn't come up to Barton and help me with my outfit, hair and makeup this year because my Mother was holding a dinner party the next night so, of course, Maja had been put on a strict schedule to clean all the invisible dirt from our house. Which left Belle to help me and despite moaning that she was a best friend not a maid, I had managed to convince her on the condition that I would fill her in on every single piece of gossip that was made during the event so she could be the one to announce the gossip or use it to her advantage to threaten girls in the school.

After I'd put on my dress, I spun for Belle to have a good look at my outfit before she helped me with hair and makeup. Of course, it was Belle so I wasn't expecting a glowing compliment but I wasn't expecting the criticism she gave me. With her arms folded and a frown on her face, she considered my dress before giving her judgement:

'No. You can't wear that.' She left no room for debate so I gaped at her, I had planned this for ages – why couldn't I wear it? And what was I going to wear instead? 'You look like you've just broken up with someone and are really upset. And I know that's the case but you can't let Ed see that because he sure as hell will look pristine,' after conceding that she was right, she flicked through my wardrobe muttering to herself and shaking her head in despair. Until she issued a faint sigh of relief and held out a dress.

'This one. Absolutely. Don't even look at Ed, just sashay around looking confident and sexy and talking to everyone but him. Trust me.' She said with absolute conviction, and after I'd looked at the dress, I knew she was right. It was a devastatingly simple strapless black mini dress which we paired with a few gorgeous pendant necklaces and waterfall earrings. Belle messily plaited an updo hairstyle and did a perfect flick of eyeliner over both my eyes. Lastly, she went to her room and returned with a pair of black peep toe stilettos. A quick glance in the mirror, I was running late and needed to get there, told me that Belle had chosen my outfit perfectly, there was no way that Ed would look more okay than I did because I looked as though I was completely over it.

'Don't do anything I wouldn't do!' Belle called after me as I rushed down the stairs towards the door.

The set up was once again incredible for the Midsummer's Ball – although the same event took place every year, the whole set up and decorations were thought up newly by the elders that year to add some diversity to it. This year, the ball was held outside under a marquee, and despite the doubt of many of the members, outside was an inspired decision. The late sunset of the mild summer's night lit the tables ladened with fresh platters of food. And once the sun set, I could see the lines of candles and lights that would aid the stars in lighting the Ball. At regular intervals along the table were small arrangements of gentle white flowers which were mirrored in the taller displays around the dance floor.

The group of immaculately dressed teens milled around, moving with a gentle current between groups of people laughing politely and taking delicate sips from their wine glasses - another thing the Brigade taught you was how to cope in society in later life. After receiving my generously filled glass of chardonnay, I scanned the groups telling myself I was just deciding who to go and talk to, but I knew deep down that I was really looking for Ed. Even though I loathed myself for caring, I couldn't stop looking for him because despite everything, he was still Ed. And I still loved him.

And then I spotted him, his familiar blond hair and confident posture and my heart warmed. I hadn't been this close to him for... since we broke up. The hurt seeped back in and cleared my gaze from the love filled fog, only for me to notice that his arm, his arm was... tucked around a girl's waist while she laid her head on his shoulder. They looked so comfortable, it was the way we always used to stand at Brigade events. Except that girl... she wasn't me. Ed was here with someone else and from their settled position they were together. No, he couldn't be here with someone else I must be imagining it. But there he was with the girl and even as I watched he leaned down the give a quick kiss on the top of her head. Was he really going to flaunt his new relationship in front of me, was he really that much of a dick? Because they weren't hiding it and he obviously knew that I was going to be here. A small noise of anger and upset escaped me and the attention in the marquee turned to me, everyone looking at me with faces mingled with pity and annoyance for the drama. But I didn't want to, couldn't, face the whole Brigade right now.

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