THE SLOPES | shawmila

nine.

A/N: i'm about to drop the final chapters so y'all best be commenting!!!

--

Like everything in Marlene's room, the drink she gave him was bubbly and pink. Shawn thought it tasted way too sweet, but took a few polite sips anyways.

They sat on her bed, Shawn back against a mountain of fluffy pillows while she sat cross-legged at the foot of the bed. Attila was on the floor by the bed, her ears twitching in his direction.

He hadn't even meant to come over here. He just knew he had to get away. He couldn't stew in that cabin, walls away from her, unable to think about anything but the last forty-eight hours.

She was right when she said he leaned in, because he had. Everything started to make sense when they were rehearsing—why she seemed one second to be all over him, and the next she was pulling back—he was forbidden, apparently.

He guessed he understood, their sisters should come first—but then she kissed him. Or, well, he kissed her. But she kissed him back.

He could practically hear his fifteen-year-old self in the back of his mind, screaming at him something like 'Why are you whining? She lets you kiss her and touch her, isn't that enough? I would kill to be you right now!'

But no, it wasn't enough. He wanted all of her. And the realization that she wasn't going to give in, even after he touched her like that, it was heart-wrenching.

Wandering around in the cold, feeling the damp parts of his body rapidly freeze outside seemed to be the only thing that sobered him up and dowsed the fire in his body that she left.

He couldn't stop hearing it echo in his mind, the way she sounded when she moaned, the way she said his name because he told her to. Fuck, it was amazing, it was everything he would have killed for before.

He supposed he should be grateful Marlene pulled him inside when she did, there were icicles starting to form in the hair at the back of his neck.

"So..." Marlene pulled him out of her thoughts.

"So?" He looked up from watching the bubbles in his drink.

"So! So, why were you out there looking all sad!" She leaned towards him. "I thought everything was going fine. Didn't you do any of the things I suggested!"

"Of course, I did!"

Shawn hadn't meant to get her involved in his problems, but it all came out last night. One second, they were rehearsing and getting a real feel for each other's music, and the next, he was going on and on about having kissed Camila.

To his surprise, Marlene seemed instantly invested. She had him retell the story of helping her rehearse her scene, and though it was a little embarrassing, he told her about kissing Camila and then how distant she became.

Marlene seemed convinced that all he needed to do was get her alone again, maybe nice and romantic by the fire, just like where all their best romantic moments had been. It was why he took her sledding again today, and while it worked—better than he'd expected, seeing as she chose an even warmer spot for them to relax—the fall out was even worse.

"Well, what happened?"

"I—we—we ended up making out a little." Shawn glanced away, trying not to blush as he took a sip of his drink. There was no way he was going to tell her where that led.

"Ooh!"

"Yeah, but then she freaked out and got all distant again." He sighed. "I'm sick of feeling like this—like I'm doing something wrong every time I kiss her. I mean, she kisses me back, so it's not like—I just don't wanna feel this way all over again."