~A/N: Listen As You Read! www.youtube.com/watch?v=tC4rE4… ~
And I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
It was all her fault, anyway. She was the reason he now practically dragged himself out of bed each morning with a discouraged sigh and lilac crescents adorning beneath his heavy-lidded eyes. She was the reason he didn't have the acumen to handle his day-to-day life, only leaving him in a miserable puddle of his own emotions to drown himself in his booze. He hated having to feel so useless without her, to feel like he had no purpose in his life whatsoever without her brushing the pads of her thumbs over his defined cheekbones. Practically loathed himself for being absolutely and utterly hopeless.
He harshly clenched his jaw, shutting his eyes tightly as he knotted his hands together over his knees, willing the water droplets that poked at the corners of his eyes to dissipate from existence. Onyx-raven locks sweeping down over his forehead to shadow the contours of his visage, he gritted his teeth tightly as his sweat-slicked locks dripped the salty perspiration to the ground below. Knuckles white with his grip, his ashen silver hues finally snapped open, releasing a tear or two.
So done with wishing,
You were still here
How idiotic were the couples wandering down the street, arms firmly linked together as a safety precaution as well as doing it just for the sake of being close to one another. The sight made the coffee sliding down his throat taste bitter as he sat outside the meager cafe. Immature young kids who knew nothing of the pain about to hit them square in the forehead.
Begrudgingly, he stared with his eyes slightly narrowed as the two cheery people strolled down the road, laughing and whispering to themselves, caught in an ablaze of loving passion and affection. He fortunately did believe that some romances weren't all too bad, but he also believed that most were not to be trusted. For instance, he remembered quite well when he mimicked the image of the couple before him with her, and look what happened. She virtually galloped into the arms of another man.
A sneer finding its way to his lips, he stood from the uncomfortable charcoal-tinted fold-out chair, and strode in the opposite direction of the couple along with his cup of coffee.
Said I'm so sick of love songs,
So sad and slow
He was so exhausted of it. So utterly and completely tired of all the mental stress put to his head from a thing as simple as the memories of a woman. And yet again, it was so complex. He felt so lost and disoriented without her, the mere thought of her made his heart ache with emotions he wasn't sure he contained, never mind capable of feeling.
He didn't want to think about the way she smiled...
He didn't want to think about her angelic laughter...
He didn't want to think about having their first child...
He just wanted to remove her presence, her essence, from ever existing in his mind. Of course, he had told himself over and over again that he simply needed to forget her. That he was better off without her. That he didn't need her love for him. And at the same time he wanted nothing more than exactly that.
Why couldn't he stop loving her...
When that's exactly what he needed to do to rid of her?
So why can't I turn off the radio?
YOU ARE READING
Attack On Titan X-Readers
FanfictionA bunch of One-Shots for your enjoyment! Each "chapter" is a different story.
