Rabid Cur (Kylo Ren x Reader)

Chapter Five

"Do you know what everyone's been saying about you? Everyone hates you now," Anya told you after hours.

You had finished another day yelling at people, glaring, threatening. You truly fit right in with your colleagues more and more everyday. But there was a price to pay.

"Look it's not a big deal. You think people like my brother or Ren?" you asked her sitting down on your bed, ready to go to sleep.

Anya had been coming over at night to your quarters when most people had gone to sleep. It was the only company you had here besides your appointments with Pryde. You had never even shared a bed before with anyone, and now Anya was right beside you, literally breathing down your neck.

But you couldn't complain. You had been the one to offer her to come over more since the influx in residents on the West end but it slowly had turned into her staying the night more often than not. You couldn't blame her for not wanting to stay on the other side of the ship now, they were packed.

The Order had to add in more recruits to keep up with the missions and deaths of some officers. You had yet to hear the mission briefing for your upcoming one, but you knew this was all just the start. The final steps of completing Starkiller Base was of utmost importance if we had to bring on this volume of newbies.

You dreaded going to your first Supreme Council meeting. It was at 12 noon tomorrow on the dot. You were so nervous you honestly felt like you could throw up. This is what everyone onboard dreams of and you just... didn't want it. You never did!

"I can see those wheels turning in your head, don't try and fool me! You're thinking about that meeting tomorrow aren't you?" Anya asked concerned.

You were biting your lip in response to your thoughts and had been buried in your own anxiousness. You had read the briefing on the mission previously but were still just so on edge about the meeting.

"But of course," you sighed. "You know me too well."

"Look you're overthinking it. You deserve this damn spot!" she said trying to cheer you up although we both were aware why you got this position.

"I mean not really...and they all know that too! They barely even know who I am and now all of the sudden I'm one of them."

"And God forbid if Armitage tries to do something to ruin things," you said angered. "That fucker ruins everything for me."

"No stop it. You're stressing too much! Everything will just fine okay, I promise," she said sweetly, trying to reassure you.

The light was turned out and she crawled under the covers. You followed and were nice and warm in your big king bed. Maybe you're just overreacting with her staying her overnight. After all, what's the point of all this room without someone to share it with, right?

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"Good afternoon," you greeted, sitting down in the large conference room where the other Supreme Council members were seated.

Armitage glared at you with such a level of disgust—the only person that that made you feel that dirty and wrong. Phasma had sat next to you with her helmet off which was comforting. She was already over the little fight you two had gotten in a few weeks prior. Pryde was at the head of the table and looked nauseated that you would ever come in with such a greeting.

You cleared your throat. "So where's Ren?"

"Nevermind him. Not important," Pryde said, gathering the files in front of him and straightening them.

"We should probably wait for him though-"

"No. Don't act like you know how to run things around here. You don't. So shut up and pay attention," Pryde told you sternly.

You had never heard him speak that way to you before when you were around other people. Your cheeks burned red and you caught Armitage sneering to himself.

The door bursted open and in came Kylo Ren.

'Was he always this tall?

Or is it because I'm sitting?'

He looked more intimidating from a sitting angle but he still wasn't that scary.

He sat down at the other head of the table and took his mask off. He raked his hands through his long raven hair and threw his mask on the table.

He looked exhausted and annoyed. You watched him carefully, and very slyly, run his hands over his forehead and squeeze his eyes shut as he tried to compose himself.

You felt almost bad for him.

Well kind of... curse your ridiculously kind heart.

To be fair this job could tire anyone out. You've spent barely any time being a bitch onboard and it was exhausting. Nevertheless your business had no time to wait and this was the true new normal.

"So kind of you to join us," Pryde spit. "Our new mission from the Supreme Leader is of utmost importance. If we do not conquer it he will be relentless in making his stance known so you all better cooperate," he said condescendingly, as if you all already weren't aware of Snoke's wrath.

"Just give me the mission," Kylo replied bothered.

"A map to Luke Skywalker. That's the goal. Since you're so ready to go, I'll make it brief for you," Pryde said his anger rising.

"You, Armitage, Miss Hux. Take Ren's command shuttle out to the only information we have. You'll be going to a different system. Don't fuck up."

He threw the briefing papers down in front of Kylo as he rolled his eyes and put his mask back on, not even bothering to look at the papers.

From across the room was Armitage, royally pissed that you were accompanying him on something of such importance. No one even believed that Luke was real anymore, and yet you'd gotten information on his whereabouts. This was huge and yet all they could do was be annoyed and upset.

"Phasma, gather your best troopers and train them even harder. It will be a long time before we get anywhere but we will be the first ones to find him. I don't care how dangerous it is. You're all dismissed."

You got up to leave but were pushed down by Pryde's hand.

"But not you," he whispered.

You took a big gulp and shifted nervously in your seat. You didn't even want to know what reason he had for keeping you but you would unfortunately soon find out.

"You my love," his breath tickled your cheek as he kissed your ear. "Meet me at midnight."

His hand left your neck and you felt the hair standup at the loss of his touch. It was mind boggling, the lengths he would go to just to get you in bed more. That's what all of this was about, wasn't it? For once, your poor eyes filled with tears and you wiped them away as you gathered yourself. Disgusted, you left the room as soon as he was gone and stumbled into a large figure.

"Sorry," you mumbled, brushing past them to continue your way into your only safety here.

You literally could not breathe. It felt like your uniform was tightening around your neck, and you had reached your breaking point. There was too much going on at once, it was making you sick to your stomach. Your first big mission would include your brother who hates you and the killing machine that couldn't stand you or anyone else. Their reactions were all you needed to know.

The reason why they didn't want to go on this mission was because you were going. You were the outlier here.

And that made you want to die.