hot chocolate ; lrh

short end of the stick

Luke Hemmings POV:

i am no longer built for black out drinking, ive realized tonight. i'm too... old? god i can't believe im saying that right. 22 isn't old, but it isn't young either, it starts to hurt a lot more the more i do it. what hurts more however, is seeing the girl i love...sorry. used to love? i dont know at this point. the time period during the writing of our album youngblood, but specifically want you back, was a really low point. but i thought i was doing so good. i hadn't thought about her lavender shampoo or the amount of times i'd find sprinkles in my kitchen after swearing up and down it was clean when she left in a long time.

but last night was a knock of reality i wasn't ready for in the least. she's alive, i can't keep pretending she's not. for my sake. not only was i absolutely gone with the alcohol, her face was the dead give away. if it weren't for that precious, curious face, i would've thought it was someone else. under the infracstructure of that face was genuine panic and looking back now, im understanding now that i caused that all those years ago. i cant imagine how horrible she must feel. but i'm confused. why was she here. and... how? then again, i don't know where she left, and nick the dick certainly wouldn't tell me. i miss him. he was my best friend for years. i wouldn't be in this mess if it wasn't for him. but then again i wouldn't change it for anything.

i groan, and rub my face hoping it took the hangover with it. i stood up off of my bed and felt incredibly dizzy. it did not. the hangover was in fact still there. i walk out of my room and all three of the boys are at the dinning table, doing various things, on their phones or eating. clearing my throat i try and confirm whether last night was a dream.

"pretty sure its the hangover talking here guys, but did i see talia last night?" no one said anything after a while, which makes sense, cause i sound ridiculous even asking a question like that. ashton spoke first.

"uhm luke i think you need to stop drinking man. why in the world would you see lia at our release party last night?" michael hummed in agreement.

"ash is right, there is no way she was there man. sorry." he pouted, giving me a comforting pat on the back.

calum was eerily suspicious. i dont remember him coming home with us...so where was he? "calllllummmm?," i dragged out. the thing with calum is, is he was good at lying sometimes. but if it came to someone he knew, it was easy.

"i didn't see anything, i swear."

"calum."

"okay so i definitely wasn't with a lady the whole night. and she definitely wasn't best friends with lia and she definitely wasn't there last night and she definitely didn't see you on the mic, and she definitely didn't leave the party to throw up around the street cause she saw you, and i definitely didn't take her to her apartment to help her calm down while she told her friend who's definitely not my lady friend person everything,"
he breathed out, telling me everything.

"oh my god i hate all of you you know i cant lie about my family." he screamed, running away to the other side of the living room and slammed the door to his room.

"fuck me," i groaned, resting my face in my hands. ashton and michael are dumbfounded.

"holy shit lia's in NEW YORK? well no wonder we could never find her at home, she wasn't even there!, "ash cried out loud.

michael sighed. "luke, dude im so sorry. you really got the short end of the stick."

"i know," i responded, walking out of the living room into my room. if only talia knew that my management told me having a girlfriend and being in a boyband at the same time wasn't good publicity and left me taken so girls would like me less. we got better management and now those rules were revoked. ashton's seeing someone i think and michael's engaged calum and i are the only single ones, and judging by his outburst, he wont be for long. which leaves just me. the only reason i haven't spoken to talia is because i had no contact, no clue where in the world she was, and to be frank, i didn't think she'd even want to hear from me at all. which makes sense. i left my girl in the dust and it wasn't even my choice. regardless, i cringe at the thought of packing, ive got a wedding of an old friends to go to and im just glad that i can use the vacation to australia for this wedding to destress. ill get to see my family, and watch my friend marry his bestfriend who knew each other since they were little. now that i thought about it though, watching someone marry their best friend when i should've done the same seemed more stressful than anything.