My Everything • LS

eight

**Harry's POV**

After Liam left, Niall and I spent another hour finishing the movie and chatting before I decided I should probably be going home too. After I left, it took around 15 minutes for me to walk back to my house and once I got home I decided to have a shower since I didn't at Niall's. I quickly stripped down and got into the hot shower and let the water completely soak me, since I didn't have anything to do that day I let myself take my time just time thinking over anything and everything. Like always, as much as I had tried to stop this, my thoughts returned to Louis. I couldn't help it, somehow it gave me a sense of peace just thinking of his beautiful blue eyes of which I knew every little detail memorised in my brain.

I knew I had to move on. I just had to. He didn't like me, of course he didn't, he's straight. He's probably out right now with some gorgeous girl having an amazing time, someone who he can have a future with, get married to, and have kids with. Just not me. He deserves someone much better than me. I'm just ugly and worthless. I'll probably end up alone for the rest of my life, I mean who would want to be with me for the rest of their life?

I got out of the shower after what must have been around 45 minutes when the hot water began to run out. I out the towel around my waist and looked in the mirror above the sink to see that my eyes were bloodshot, I hadn't even realised I was crying. That seems to be happening a lot more recently. Once I had returned to the warmth of my bedroom and got changed into my favourite comfy clothes I noticed it was 7pm meaning my mum would be home soon. I decided that having nothing to do and knowing the she would have had a tiring day at work, I would make something simple for dinner since I wasn't a great cook. My mum worked so hard for our family and I often forgot to thank her for it, we didn't have much money as a family and my dad left 2 years ago without saying anything so she's been constantly working at the hospital as a nurse trying to provide for my sister, gemma and i. She's truly incredible and she's my favourite person in the world.

I headed down to the kitchen and got out everything I needed to make mums favourite pasta. Just as it was finishing and it was being served up, i heard the door open and my mums voice ring though the house, "Hi Harry, i'm home! Ooh is that pasta i smell??" I laugh at the excitement in her voice and call her through to where I am as i set the plates out on the table. Gemma is currently at collage so it's just mum and i every night. When she comes through i see that she looks absolutely exhausted from work, I give her a hug and tell her to sit down so she can eat and get to bed as soon as possible.

we began to eat and i tell her all about my time with niall and liam. I can tell she's tired but she always listens to me. she tells me about her day, it seems the same as every other day but to her it's always something new. I love hearing all the stories she has about her patients and everything that goes on in the hospital.

we finish dinner and i clean up so that she can go to sleep, thankfully she has Sundays off so she won't have to go in tomorrow. we say goodnight to each other and i head up to my room, i decide now would be a perfect time to get as much homework done as possible as it's 8:30pm and i  don't usually go to sleep for another 2 hours and i have nothing better to do.

time moves terribly slowly but by 10pm i was finished all of the homework due monday so i'd have tomorrow to do whatever i wanted to, i wasn't sure what that would be yet. i close the lid of my laptop and walk towards my bed and fall into it, immediately falling asleep.

...

with my eyes still shut, i threw my hand around looking for the source of that annoying sound that interrupted my dreaming every morning indicating yet another slow day of school. I eventually found my phone sitting on my bedside table still buzzing and making the most irritable noises ever, i had to change that alarm sound as soon as possible.

it was 7:15am and I had 20 minutes before I needed to leave the house. having had a shower last night, I didn't need to have one this morning so I just got changed, brushed my teeth and fixed my hair taking on around 7 minutes. Once I looked fairly presentable, I went downstairs to find my mum sitting at the table looking a bit brighter but still tired. She had cooked bacon and eggs and it was lucky I got ready so quickly because I still had some time to eat some of it.

After grabbing a plate, I sat down across from her at the table and we spoke about what our days were going to look like. I hadn't told her anything about my situation with Louis because it wouldn't make sense without telling the whole story and I wasn't ready to tell her about my feelings for him. That would spark a whole new conversation which I didn't have time for nor did I want it.

Once we finished our food, I rinsed the dishes and put them in the dishwasher and headed back up to my room to grab the bag i packed the night before to my benefit as i was needing to leave the house now. i quickly put my shoes on said goodbye to my mum and headed out the door. the cold air immediately hit my face and i immediately regretted not bringing my jacket but i did't have time to go and find one. I began my walk to the bus stop wondering how today would go.

There's no point in saying i wasn't upset about not talking to louis anymore, who, despite everything, i would still consider my best friend. It often surprised me that I never saw louis on the journey to the bus stop in the morning considering he lived just a few houses away from me, but to be honest i was thankful for it. We used to both walk together and sit together on the bus and then would be attached by the hip the whole day at school then would hang out after school as well and now I don't even see him at all. I wished things would go back to how they were before. and it was all my fault.

Before I knew it I was at the bus stop and just as I arrived, so did the bus. I quickly got on and sat down to escape the cold air. I plugged my headphones in as I usually did and watched as the trees and houses became just a blur as we drove past.

Once we arrived at school, I went towards my locker and after putting everything of mine away I headed to liams, where him and niall were standing.  I plastered on my fake smile and said hi to them and they did the same to me. we spoke for a while but I wasn't fully there.

suddenly my mouth went dry and I went lightheaded still faintly hearing the distant-sounding mumbling of niall and liams conversation. I saw a girl pressed up against someone's locker with louis' tongue down her throat.

new chapter!! I haven't been doing great recently so that's why I've been quite unmotivated to update but I decided to get one out so here ya go :)

please comment what you think of it!! x