My Everything • LS

five

**Louis's POV**

I'd never felt so alone despite being surrounded by my 3 best friends, well perhaps 2 now as I'm messing everything up, 'it has to be done' I remind myself. Harry and Niall haven't stopped talking to each other, Liam is infatuated with Zayn for some reason, and I feel like I'm completely alone.

It occurred to me that the game had ended as everybody began to stand up. Judging by everybody's smiles and cheers, I'm guessing our team won but I wouldn't have known since I was apparently in my own little world the entire time. We all began to walk towards Liam's car and Liam turned round to wave to Zayn again, I was very confused as I'd never seen them together before, oh well. We had this sort of tradition where after a football match, we'd all go to Liam's house to hang out but due to the fact that me and Harry weren't exactly speaking I didn't feel in the mood to hang out so I quickly tried to think up an excuse.

"Um, I'm going to head home early tonight" My head raced to find a suitable excuse, "Lottie wasn't feeling too good before I left so I told mum I'd help her out after the game. Sorry guys, hope you have fun." That was a decent excuse right? I mean Liam seemed to buy it, Niall looked hesitant but Harry could see right through me, his perfect emerald eyes stared right into mine and I could see the sadness in them, he was clearly putting the blame on himself for our situation, I couldn't tell him the real reason as much as I wanted. I cut the eye contact to save myself from spilling everything. It hurt so much to have to lie to him but I had no choice, it would only hurt the both of us even more if I were to tell him the real truth.

With Harry still looking at me, I knew I needed to get out of this as soon as possible so instead of letting Liam give me a lift home I decided just to walk. I said goodbye to everyone and turned away and began to walk away. I could still feel Harry's eyes burning into the back of my head but I wouldn't let myself turn around and risk loosing control of my body and run towards him and never let him go as I all too often wanted to do.

Finally I heard Liam's car start up and drive away, towards his house. I continued walking letting my thoughts take over, something I'd tried to avoid but couldn't any longer. It wasn't until I felt my foot become drenched as it fell into a large puddle that I realised it had been pouring with rain. My clothes were drenched and my hair was dripping with water. I picked up my speed hoping to get home as soon as possible, I just wanted to go to sleep.

Another 10 minutes and I was entering the drive way to my house and like some cruel magic trick, the rain stopped rather abruptly and I cursed it for pouring as I was outside and deciding to stop as I entered my house. 

"Oh hi honey, you're home earlier than I- oh my goodness you're soaked!" mum said as I walked in the house shivering and dripping rain all over the wooden floor. She helped me take off my jacket and shooed me away upstairs to have a warm shower.

As I stepped into the shower, I just stood there giving myself time to calm down and relax. As the hot water ran over my skin, I realised that's not all I needed, I needed it do more than just wash the outside, I needed it to heal me inside. I wanted rid of the feelings I had for Harry, I needed it to heal the pain I felt every time I saw him, just wishing I could call him mine. I needed them gone, they caused me nothing but pain.

After standing in the shower for a good 40 minutes, I stepped out and wrapped the fluffy, white towel around my waist and made my way to my bedroom to get changed. I put on a pear of grey joggers and a black t-shirt and shook out my hair and swept it to the side not caring how it looked at the moment. Remembering that my mum had asked me to come down after my shower, I made my way downstairs.

"Come on boobear, come sit with me" My mum said to me once I entered the kitchen where she had been tidying up. I could tell by her tone, she'd rather be asleep right now suggesting this was rather important. I sat down beside her and yawned causing her to yawn as well. "I just was wondering why you came home so early today, don't you normally hang out with the boys after a match? Is everything alright?"

"Oh right, I guess it was just a long day at school and I was too exhausted and you know better than anyone, I can get pretty grumpy when I'm tired and I didn't want to put that on them." We both laughed and she nodded. After we both stopped laughing, she turned back to me and looked deep into my eyes and I knew that, just like Harry did, she saw straight through my lie. They were the only two who knew me well enough, I guess that's what you get when you spend your whole life attached to them like magnets. 

Mum thankfully decided however, not to comment any further on it. "You do look tired to be honest" we both laughed at the subtle insult, "You go get your beauty sleep honey" I smiled and she kissed my forehead and headed towards her own bedroom. I got myself a glass of water and headed up to my room. I lay down on my bed and as soon as my head hit the pillow I fell asleep.

...

My phone lit up with a message from Harry, waking me up.

Hazza 💚: I'm outside, come out when you're ready? x

I checked the time realising I'd slept in again 'damn I need to get a better alarm' I said to myself. I ran to my closet and put on the first thing I saw, a pair of black jeans and a plain t-shirt, same as almost every other day.

Me: Ahhh sorry I slept in again, I'll be out in 5 x

I ran to the bathroom to brush my teeth, I fixed my hair, grabbed my bag by the side of my desk, pulled my shoes on and ran out the door to meet Harry in his car. 

As I got in the car Harry just sat there and gave me his gorgeous dimpled smile and I could tell he was not surprised that I had missed my alarm again. After giving me the 'you need to be more organised' look, he reached over the middle of the car and planted a delicate kiss to my temple and as he moved back to his seat I stopped him, grabbing the back of his neck and pressed my lips against his. It was just a small gentle peck but still managed to send shivers down my spine as it did every time.

"Come on, we're already late enough" he said as he turned back to his seat and turned the engine on. We both laughed and I apologised for the delay. 

When we got to the school, it was half an hour into first period, we could have been more or less on time if it wasn't for the huge amounts of traffic. "Well is there any point in going to class now if we've already missed half of it" Harry spoke up and seeing the mischievous look in his eyes, I could tell where he was going with this. I grabbed his hand and we began running towards the back of the school. Out of sight, we both sat down with our backs against the fence but he quickly pulled me up so I was sitting on his lap.

I could stare into his eyes for hours without getting bored, and clearly I was "stop staring it's creeping me out" Harry laughed. I shook myself out of my daydream and we both laughed .

"I missed you hazza"

"C'mon it was only one night without me, I'm back tonight if it's alright with your mum"

"You know it is, she loves you almost as much as I do" we laughed because we both knew it was true, my mum loved Harry as if he were her own, thank goodness he wasn't. I think she prefers him over me to be honest.

Harry put his arms around my waist and mine instinctively wrapped around his neck and we stared into each others eyes, we both began to move in closer. Our eyes closed and I could feel the heat of his breath against my lips, just before our lips touched we were interrupted, "Louis!" "Louis!" I looked around but couldn't tell where it was coming from as there was no-one around. I turned my attention back to Harry but I kept hearing it.

"Louis!"

"Louis!"

"Louis! Come on!"

I shot up in my bed and saw my mum standing at my door trying to get me to wake up. I sighed wishing I could go back to sleep and continue what had become a reoccurring dream. It was only Wednesday and it felt like Friday, this was going to be a long hard week. I got up nonetheless and got ready for yet another boring day of school, having to avoid the one man I've ever loved.