madeline // a Taylor Swift adoption

29 // youre back!

maddies pov

it was now monday, and it's been a week and two days since i broke my leg.
it was all over social media, there was even a video of me collapsing and screaming that circulated the internet and all of the celebrity news channels.
it made me sick just knowing that millions of people saw me like that.
i haven't talked to taylor or anyone actually since the day i had surgery.
well, i've said a few things. for example, i told her i wanted to go to school today.
but that's literally all i've said to her.
i wasn't mad at her.
i wasn't mad at anyone, so i don't really know why i'm not talking, but i feel like it's just easier.
that way, i'm not crying or getting all emotional.
at 2:15, the bell finally rang, dismissing everyone to go home.
"ready to go to practice?" peyton asked from next to me.
i nodded my head and she picked up my backpack to carry.
she's been carrying my things all day.
she's also been trying to get me to talk to her, but i haven't.
"well.." peyton started to say, opening the doors to the front of the school. "just incase you were wondering, i made the states team over the weekend at regionals... i just wish.. you could be racing with me.." she said looking at the pavement as i crutched beside her.
she kept rambling about other things for
a few more minutes, and then finally we made it to the locker room.
"maddie!! you're back!" i heard as soon as i walked in, and then i was surrounded by all the girls wanting hugs.
then my coach came up to me.
"we missed ya, kid." she said, then she put her arm around my shoulders.
"okay! states is next weekend, two weeks away! the ten girls running at states need to get out on the track to warm up. the rest of you need to turn in your uniforms and then you can head on out!" she said, without letting me go.
i forgot about my uniform.
oops.
i sat down on a bench and then i watched as peyton headed out wit the rest of the girls.
then, coach looked down at me as she finished putting the uniforms in the box.
"i'm assuming you forgot yours, bring it tomorrow, okay?" she said and i nodded my head. "also, sarah told me that when you get back to go talk to her." she added, and my heart dropped.
shit.
i forgot about that too.
i groaned, and my coach laughed at me before heading out to practice.
i grabbed my crutches from the floor and stood up, walking slowly to the door that lead to the training room.
then i opened the door.
"what do ya need?" i heard from her desk around the corner. after there was no response, i heard sarah's wheels on her chair roll against the floor.
"oh, maddie! hey!" she then said. "shut the door and sit down somewhere, would ya?"
i shut the door and walked over to a table across from her desk, taking off my shoe so i could put both legs up.
"i heard you had surgery, how has recovery been?" she asked after she closed her laptop.
i didn't answer or look up.
if i looked up at her, i'd cry.
"hm, i'm guessing not good?" she asked again, and i finally spoke for the first times in days.
"it's fine. just a little pain.." i said, fiddling with my fingers as i spoke.
"i'm sorry, that's stinks." sarah said with a frown.
"well.. i wanted to talk to you last weekend about some things i noticed about you... and some concerns that both me and your coach had- and honestly, the things that happened last weekend almost confirm our thoughts, but i wanted to hear from you." sarah paused and looked at me as i stared at her with wide eyes.
concerns?
"i'm just gonna get right into it... uhm.. so i've noticed that you've lost a significant amount of weight since i first met you, and your coach was actually the one that brought it to my attention."
oh god.
after i didn't say anything, she continued talking. "a huge sign of not fueling properly is passing out, more injuries, weight loss, and... you have all of those." she said, looking at me, waiting for me to talk back, but nothing would come out.
"i eat, sarah." i said, and i sounded rude, but i didn't care.
i was fine.
"maddie." she said, rolling over to me on her stool and placing her hand on my foot. "i've never once seen you eat."
i furrowed my eyebrows. "okay but? why... would you see me eat? you don't live with me."
sarah took a deep breath in, trying her best not to lose her cool.
"i'm only talking to you about this because i'm worried and i care about you, maddie..." she started.
"i mean.. your shorts that fit you perfectly at the beginning of the season are literally falling down."
she was right... they were.
i looked down at my hands, and before i knew it, i silently started to cry.
i heard sarah get up from her stool, and she sat down next to me, rubbing her hand up and down my back.
"you can't tell taylor." i said quietly after a few minutes, wiping the tears from my face.
"maddie..." she said, but i cut her off.
"she'll think it's her fault." i whispered.
i wasn't wrong.
this started for several reasons, but one of them happened to be because i was getting bashed online... taylor would lose her shit if she found out about this.
she would blame herself, i just know it.
"i'm sorry, mads... i have to tell her. you're sick, and you need help." she said, and i was immediately sent to tears again.
this cannot be happening right now.
sarah opened up her laptop to find my parent contact card, and then grabbed her cellphone to call taylor.
i watched as she put the phone to her ear, and held my breath when i heard taylor's happy little "hey!" on the other end.
"hi taylor, it's sarah.. i need you to come get maddie and meet us in the training room.. we have a few things to talk about."