I immediately pushed Ash off of me and brought my hands to my head started pacing back and forth "Wh-at.. what do you mean by we!?!." Ash tried to pull me back to him but I reacted before he could and made my way inside his house ran upstairs to get dressed and get my keys.
"Lemon what do you think you're doing? You are not leaving this house!." I didn't pay him any attention the only thing running through my mind is him saying 'we can start fresh together', don't get me wrong I would love nothing more than that but he's married for fuck sake and I never intended to fall in love him.
My dress, shoes were back on but I couldn't remember where I placed my damn car keys. Ash kept making talking and trying to touch me but I couldn't let him. I was about to make my way down the stairs till I heard Ash yell at me for the first time.
"Lemon Martinez will you fucking listen to me and stop acting like a fucking child for once in your god damn life! You're honestly truly pathetic you get mad at Lovella for what? Sleeping with your father? Huh it's truly funny you sleep with older men just like her and yet you cry like a baby and run away from your problems? You're a whore Lemon that's all you will ever be. Honestly I take back my statement I don't want to start fresh with you and I can manage without you in my life get the hell out of my house! I don't ever want to see you again!"
Speechless, I was utterly speechless the man who I was in love completely shattered me. No tears could come out which I was grateful, didn't say anything to him just made my way down the stairs to his garage I saw my keys on the floor right under the passcode box. Picked up my keys, got in my car , started it and waited for Ash to put in his code.
Ash came down, I didn't look up at him so I couldn't even tell you if he looked at me part of me wanted him to tell me everything he said was a lie and pull me out of the car and kiss me, but I knew that wouldn't happen he meant every single word.
The garage doors opened and I backed up and sped out of his driveway not looking back once. I couldn't go back to the house I shared with Lovella the only place I could think of was a hotel. I parked my car got my phone from the back seat and made my way to the front desk.
"Hi welcome, how can I help you?" The lady smiled at me "I just need a one bedroom please." she started typing on the key bored for awhile finally broke the silence "How many nights are you going to be staying with us?." Shit I honestly didn't know "A week."
The lady finally gave me my key card and made my way into the hotel room, took off my shoes and dress and jumped on the bed. I turned my phone back on and no surprise Lovella blowing up my phone, I didn't have the energy to read any of the messages so I just turned my phone back off.
I woke up a couple hours later, not knowing what to do. One thing I do know is I'm getting out of this fucking place, I can't turn my phone on because Lovella will be able to track it. I'm still in my fucking dress, brought no fucking clothes with me life is just fucking peachy.
I ordered tons of room service and watched Grey's Anatomy on TV, I'm in love with McDreamy and McSteamy if only I could have what Meredith and Lexie has but it's a TV show it's not real.
Also I will always say George O'Malley deserved so much better, he shouldn't have died the way he did.
As I'm drowning myself into Grey's Anatomy till I finally get myself out of this funk. I go into the bathroom making sure I don't look like a hot mess and make my way down to the front entrance.
I'm finally in my car and just sit waiting for the tears to come out but like couple hours ago, nothing would come out.
As I'm driving I think of ways to kill myself in this car, but wouldn't that be a cope out? Or would that just make everyone happy that I'm officially gone for good?.
Soon after I park right in front of a library and make my way to a computer to buy a plane ticket far away from here. Thank god one step closer to having atleast peace in my life, it feels like the weight that was on my shoulders is completely gone.
I also break my phone and throw it in the trash, I'm not going to be reminded about what has happened in my life. I drive to T-mobile to get a new phone which comes with a new number.
Before I make my way back to the hotel I stop at Walmart to buy some clothes to get out of this fucking dress, I change in the Walmart bathroom and place my black dress in the Walmart bad and throw it in the trash.
The plane ticket I got is for tonight, I drive to the Hotel the same lady that checked me in last night is there. I walk up to her "Hi, Amanda can I cancel the rest of the nights I'm leaving right now." Amanda just smiles and nods her head.
As she's doing that I go in my phone and order a Uber to take me to the airport, Amanda tells me how much I owe hand her my debit card and pay for everything. "Thank you for you stay have a wonderful night."
"Hey, Amanda here's my car keys you can keep my car don't worry everything is paid for, I don't need it." Before she can say anything I just drop the keys in front of her and walk out and get in the Uber.
Goodbye California and Hello Seattle.
