The Summer of '93

Keeping it in the family

We went back to Dionisis' Aunts. I had no preconceptions about impressing his family but it was clear as soon as I walked into the hall she disapproved. The house had a dark and gloomy entrance. The house felt cold. It wasn't the weather, the heating was on. There was no natural light, the nets restricted the light from passing in and it was bordering on hostile. The deviation inside was so dated and of a period reminiscent of my Grandma's. It sang 1950s to me. His Aunt gave a weak smile, looked me up and down, but there was a clear disapproval on her part of me being present and involved with her Nephew. She was olive skinned, middle aged, dark haired, which was in a flicked bob - it was shortish, and she dressed very conservatively. It was apparent that she felt she had the measure of me but she smiled. I think Dionisis had to stand up to her, me being there. I sensed a clear friction between them. Another difficulty was that I couldn't understand their conversation. It was so frustrating, but then when the language isn't there, it is much more apparent as to what the body language and tone of language is communicating.

Dionisis dropped off his things at his Aunts. We went into his room. This room was full of natural light and it streamed in and danced around the walls and he drew the curtains. I studied his room. 

He had an ink drawing of a poster he had done of lettering and of a car. Dionisis loved cars and basketball. His cartoons were wonderful. As we drove about he would always pick out Audi TT's and I craved a Mazda MX-5 with its luxurious bronze paintwork. Dionisis could easily have been an accomplished illustrator. His room felt homely with a poster of Mariah Carey on the wall. There was a poster of Sam Fox too, which made me chuckle. He loved Mariah's music and I could understand why. His sound system happily came into life. Oh how I missed music in my home! Marian's voice broke the quiet and  it was as clear as a bell when he played it in his room. Life finally entered. There was more music in this room and I sensed it was because his pre University possessions were here, rather than his necessities that were contained in his bijoux abode in Heidelberg. Whilst we were there, he copied some music for me to take away (and he wrote all the cards neatly in his beautiful stylised curvaceous script). It felt like it was a new experience of him to share his taste of music with me and for it to be genuinely appreciated. Life felt good. This trip had been good for the soul. Dionisis was good for my soul. I felt truly content.

I wasn't happy that he gave up his bed to me and he made himself a makeshift bed on the floor, but I understood and I was quite frankly surprised we were getting away with sleeping in the same room. Having travelled alone around Greece when I was 17 and having a bus companion stranger look down her nose on me for travelling alone without a chaperone, I could only imagine what a low opinion his Aunt had of me right now. I am sure she was thinking a good Greek girl with morals would not entertain it. I imagined his Aunt perceiving me as the defiant corrupter of Men. I did consider too in a less dramatic way that perhaps his Aunt was scared of my presence. I didn't need to speak Greek to understand that. She wanted nothing to interfere with his studies and I was an unwelcome corruptive distraction. I doubted too that he made a habit of this behaviour. The last thing I truly wanted was to be perceived that way. Studies came first ahead of everything. I am sure he was being very out of character as he carried an air of defiance whilst there.

It was pleasurable driving both brothers into Bad Wimpfen.  It was a picturesque medieval town. His brother Giannis wasn't as outgoing as Dionisis but he was pleasant and we shared laughter. By this time we were sharing a genuinely enjoyable time and had a fantastic evening. Dionisis was in advertising mode. He showed me all his drawings. We talked cars and music. It was one of those talks that just goes on forever, punctuated with an endearing passion and exuberance. It felt like I was meeting his family to almost seek approval on some level. I sensed he was happy to enjoy and catalogue all this personal effects in his room, a rare occurrence clearly now, purely down to lack of opportunity. My head was completely full of nonsense as I observed and couldn't help smiling at his personal joy to feel comfortable amongst his treasured possessions which he greeted like old friends and handled. Each one had a history, a story. I sat back and interjected with affirmation and smiled. By now I was hoping for a future with him. My mind wandered. I stopped and reined myself in. This Hormones, must be.

We stopped at the Blue Tower named after its limestone hues. I read that it was almost completely destroyed in a fire and was only reinstated in the 1970s. I was amazed to read that from April to September at noon, there is a trumpeter who plays chorales from the top, resonating across the town. Germany really had some historical traditions. 

We had dinner and the Men effortlessly and articulately switched between Greek and English. I did try to speak as much Greek as I could. With Giannis and Dionisis the laughter flowed and even his Aunt joined in. I really did enjoy their company. I offered to help cook and wash up but they were not having any of it. 

Later his Aunt popped her head round the bedroom door to check on us; I was in Dionisis' bed and he was on the floor. It wasn't the Greek way! You know when someone is receiving grief and is cross to have to justify the response. His conversation with her made it so obvious that that was transpiring between them. For the first time I saw Dionisis troubled as his brow furrowed.  I understood that at 23  he should be respectful in his Aunt's house and I was conscious of that. However I just didn't want to spend a moment apart from him. I was smitten. But at this moment I wish he'd gone for Easter with his family alone. I didn't want to be the cause of any friction or unnecessary grief. It really was not boding well. Dionisis' Aunt was the conduit into his Mother and I was concerned. 

The following day we were up at lunchtime. To be honest I didn't sleep well. I think it was all the bad feeling that was swirling around. The house had an atmosphere. However I tried to overlook it and otherwise, we had a very pleasant day; they were so kind and had bought me an Easter egg. I wish I had anticipated it. I only realised that I should have take his Aunt something. But Dionisis had the handle on all plans and I wasn't part of the discussions, which made things difficult, without the language and the local knowledge. If I had known I should have taken some shortbread with me for impromptu gifts like this and as well, I was way out of that comfortable place. We shared the egg. I think I had been out of tune because at home, Easter eggs were more for children. It never even crossed my mind.

"Thank you so much! I'm not used to all this kindness." I said.

"You're welcome!" he said. I genuinely felt embarrassed because I had nothing for them.

"How is Easter celebrated?" I asked. 

"You know, it's probably more important than Christmas." He continued, "Back home eggs are dyed red and children are bought new clothes. It's a big family celebration. It never even dawned on me this was the reason why Dionisis had returned back to his Aunts. It was the tradition to be with family. We had a meal together but his Aunt didn't speak English and it was nice to hear them relax and chatting in Greek. Both Giannis and Dionisis  were so attentive and thoughtful, passing plates and cutlery could across the table. Afterwards we hung out in Dionisis' bedroom. We listened to his music. He  swapped tracks and enjoyed himself and took along with him and it was just great, so blissful together and relaxing so freely. He was consistently great company. There was a bit of discordance between him and his Aunt whenever she visited his room. The conversation was so obviously incongrous, even in Greek and it was clearly about me sharing his room again as well as her disapproving expression to top it off. It was completely obvious that my non-Greek face didn't fit, at all. I felt badly but what could I do? 

We awoke together. I missed lying and waking up next to him. It's amazing how quickly something you crave becomes a habit  so easily when you want it. I felt as though we were forced apart. I was very glad to leave his Aunts. I eagerly left behind her pervasive disapproval very gladly.