Played like a Guitar

Chapter 24 : The Ceremony

"Oh, I wouldn't mind, Hazel Grace. It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by you." - John Green

***

"Hurry up, I'm gonna be late!" - I yelled at Elektra, who was struggling to conceal the huge dark circles around my sleep deprived eyes.

"It's a concealer Noah, not a miracle worker." Once she applied the entire bottle, I gathered enough confidence to check myself out in the hand mirror.

"Well, considering you woke up half an hour ago, you look...adequate enough." - Leo failed to console me.

"Oh please, the outfit is so BOMB, no one will even care about those heavy eye bags. Look at you, so elegant and sophisticated!" - I pretended to switch poses like a model, with my matte black pants and white blazer with black pockets and lapel. I chose an approachable formal look, but nothing too fancy to draw unnecessary attention. "With all those celebrities around, no one will even notice you." I threw the mirror onto the bed but it bounced right off the edge, the glass smashing against the wooden floor. Ugh, why am I so clumsy whenever I'm in a rush?

"Don't worry, I'll clean it. Just go!" - El reassured, pushing me to the door.

"Thanks love, I'll see you guys later at the party!" - I gave her a fat smooch on the cheek before disappearing outside. Majorly disoriented, I asked random folks for directions every five minutes to ensure I was on the right track. It seemed like the world was preventing me from making it on time, as a random parade was taking place in one of the main streets we passed through last night. Go around and take the longer road, or push my way to the Cathedral?

Checking the time on my watch, I dived right into the crowd, a real human tsunami ready to crush me to bits if I were to stand in its way. People with flags, instruments and posters all were clustered together like a can of sardines in this slender street. I squeezed through the right side, trying not to stumble against the cafe chairs and tables filled with tourists. Trumpets buzzed into my ears only inches away and feet kept stepping on my new shoes, making me regret choosing this path. Alright, halfway there, no turning back now! The moment I squeezed out of the crowd, a dark cat jumped out of a restaurant onto the table next to me, spilling a glass of red wine all over my white blazer. I opened my mouth, wishing to scream until every glass within a mile radius shattered, but I kept my composure. Are you fucking kidding me?! This isn't happening right now...

The passersby laughed at my misfortune, as I was covered in wine and humiliation. What the hell do I do now? The last rows of the parade passed, allowing me to analyze the nearby shops for any clothing stores. As expected, not a single one was in sight. The only option left was the sweater seller, to whom I prayed internally would have something appropriate for me not to make a complete fool of myself on every magazine and news channel tomorrow.

"What can I do for yer, sham?" - an old man with a long grey beard asked with the strongest accent I've ever heard, but his question answered itself upon seeing the disaster that was my wedding suit. No words required.

"Let me clap what oi can fend." - he mumbled an alien language, whatever that meant. He proceeded to roam around the store but all I could see were sweaters (who would've thought?), cardigans and T-shirts with Irish flags and shamrocks. He approached one of the corners where an adult-sized leprechaun costume stood. Does he plan on...? No freaking way. No, no, no!

"This is al' oi 'av." - he said, showing me the green jacket with three black buttons, confirming my biggest fear. Going back to our accommodation was not an option since Leo and El probably left already and took the only pair of keys with them. I was even doubting whether the wedding was even worth attending dressed like a clown, but the costly tickets we paid shall not go to waste. "You flied all the way here to see the man who broke your heart twice, get married. You're a clown already." - the voice couldn't resist adding. I'm the whole circus, excuse you! Ah, the things I'm willing to do for that bastard. I tried the green piece on in front of the mirror, afraid to see my reflection.